June 2013 Moms
spaceunicorn
member
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snarky mommies?
spaceunicorn
member
So, I've only been on the bump for a few days and I have seen so many snarky comments, attacks, and bullying between mommies on here. someone attacked me for using the word "preggie" to describe a pregnant woman. i mean, seriously? Heck, I call myself knocked up and preggie really isn't that bad.....
I don't come onto these boards to be ridiculed or harassed, thought these boards were for support! (happened on a different board.)
anyone else notice stuff like that going on?
~spaceunicorn~
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Re: snarky mommies?
Yes....I have noticed it. I've been on here a few months but honestly haven't had the time to 'lurk' and whatnot. I come on every now an then to see what's happening or if I have a question.
There are a lot of nice ladies and good information that I have found very useful. But to be honest, there are quite a number of ladies that are a bit snarky imo even though they say they are not snarky. I sometimes feel afraid to post because someone will attack me...or my husband/family etc.
Sometimes I wish there was a 'TTC no snarkiness allowed' board.
I'm sure I'll get nailed for even posting this
BFP#1 09/2009 * EDD 6/19/2010 * Born 6/12/2010
BFP#2 6/03/2012 * EDD 2/09/2013 * MC @ 5w2d 6/13/2012
BFP#3 8/30/2012 * EDD 5/16/2013
Maggie, well I know you're not alone. I sort of posted the same theme of a post on the "new to the bump" boards and got quite a few replies with one "snarky" comment, telling me to grow thick skin because that's just how it is on this site.
My hope is that the June 2012 (or any birth board for that matter) isn't as cut-throat as the rest of the community is.
I have a mommy friend who echoed the same (negative) feelings about the bump, but she also said that she has made wonderful friends through her birth boards. Hoping for that same experience!
and I second on the "no snarkiness allowed" board idea. I wonder if it's possible, seeing how there is a "Snarky and T-TTC" board! Why not have a 'safer' zone!
Yes, I completely agree. I felt a bit alone in that for a few weeks. I haven't ventured onto any other sites yet. I do think there is a lot of good information, support and experiences on here. But at the same time a lot of anger, snark, rudeness etc. I can understand being angry about situations, but please do not take that out on me, my family or others.
I have 1 child and I'm a working mom, trying for our second. I try to stay positive in my life as much as possible, which doesn't mean I don't complain or have frustration or down/sad times. I do have those feelings many times! But that is the reason I look for positive support, empathy, shared experiences and advice. Not for someone I don't know personally and doesn't know me or my family to call my husband a douche bag. I love my husband dearly and me taking his feeling in consideration does not make him a douche bag. (that was a mini vent from a post I received, bah!)
BFP#1 09/2009 * EDD 6/19/2010 * Born 6/12/2010
BFP#2 6/03/2012 * EDD 2/09/2013 * MC @ 5w2d 6/13/2012
BFP#3 8/30/2012 * EDD 5/16/2013
well hopefully we will all end up on this board and all be supportive of each other!
I'm really glad I'm not alone. I have been on other baby boards before (different websites) but I thought I'd try something different this go around, and have found the website to be very nice.
Hope we all get our BFPs next month!
BFP#1 09/2009 * EDD 6/19/2010 * Born 6/12/2010
BFP#2 6/03/2012 * EDD 2/09/2013 * MC @ 5w2d 6/13/2012
BFP#3 8/30/2012 * EDD 5/16/2013
I'm with you guys. I posted in the "Trying to get pregnant" board and had someone that was so mean to me so now I don't post there anymore
I came here hoping have a support group not people who were mean to me. I am hoping to be either in the May or June 2013 group 
I'm glad there are so many nice people here already!
Good luck, everyone!
Chelsea, that sucks people treated you badly. I wonder if they see our "newbie" badge and pounce on us all? lol! GL on TTC!
Oh, I totally can relate to that ^^. my first DS was 7 months when I got KU with DS #2. It'll be okay, and hopefully you will have that good experience you were looking for this go around
BFP#1 09/2009 * EDD 6/19/2010 * Born 6/12/2010
BFP#2 6/03/2012 * EDD 2/09/2013 * MC @ 5w2d 6/13/2012
BFP#3 8/30/2012 * EDD 5/16/2013
May I join you ladies? I was afraid to post on here, but I've read all of the posts and it seems like we've all been teased for being hopeful...
I'd like us all to get our BFPs in a few weeks so we'll all have June 2013 babies!
boysenberry, LOVE THE NAME!
and yes, of course, please join us. I mean, we are just hopeful right now, right? I hope we all get our BFP's!
Thank you!!!!
I really hope we'll all be able to make this our board! My husband and I are intensely wanting a baby - I think he's even more obsessed than I am. We began discussing having a baby last September. By November of last year we had names picked out, and we started "trying" a week before we got married, in March. When I showed him the BFP on June 29th he got so excited. Our loss was devastating to us both, and we're still crying every day. It happened recently, but our doctor gave us the green light to conceive again right away. Now my husband has baby fever and he wants 3 kids. I'll be 34 by the time our baby is born, so we're eager to have all of our babies within the next 4 years...
The name "Boysenberry" is actually the title character of the children's book series I'm working on. Boysenberry is my alter ego...
hi ladies! i just popped in here - not sure why, except that I'm hoping to be a may or june 2013 mommy! - i don't go on the bump that often and I haven't had any bad experiences personally but I do know what you're talking about.
I just wanted to say that there's another site I'm on a lot called www.countdowntopregnancy.com for those of you still ttc and it's almost completely snark-free. Actually I've never seen an instance of anyone being less than friendly on it. (I think the forums here have more traffic, but I like it because you can chart and track tww symptoms and stuff on there in addition to the forums)
I'm el2011 on there if you decide to join. If not, I hope to see you all around either here or on the May 2013 mommies board. (AF is due in 6-7 days, the wait is killing me!)
BFP with #1 (twins!) 11/18/2011 - missed m/c at 8weeks3days; d&c 1/19/2012; myomectomy to remove 18cm+,10cm & 5cm fibroids 4/2012; TTC again 7/2012; BFP #2 (twins) 11/13/2012; missed m/c at 7weeks;
BFP #3: baby girl born 3/5/2014
Balaustine: an anthology about wanting family
throws more baby dust in Banker's eyes. NO YOU CAN'T!!
Yep!
Pot/kettle?
running off to another board doesn't mean others can't read this still.
BFP #1:10/31/10 DS born 6/22/11BFP #3:4/24/12 DD born 12/31/12
oh, get over yourselves.
the ladies on here so far are quite encouraging. it's what i would like to get out of TB.
Overall TB is full of nice folks, but people to tease and try to stir the pot just confuse me - do ya'll have nothing better to do that poke at newbs? seriously? TTGB is a wonderful board, and I do 'lurk' there, but THIS board is where i am AIMING to end up.
Trying to get away from as many snarky people who have 'seen the same questions over and over' that the newbs keep asking and veteran bump members jump on and flame.
hope ya'll have a super day.
So will you post on every BMB until you actually end up on one? and almost every single post that gets "flamed" on TTGP can be answered by reading and lurking.
I've looked back at other BMB and other people have done the *same exact thing*, yet other people don't get all mad about them posting there. Really, I don't know why me (and other mommies on this June 2013 board) are so looked down upon because we are hoping to make early connections with like-minded people.
I posted this thread in my early days of being on TB, and I honestly felt that a lot of people were pretty snarky. Since then, I have seen very compassionate and honest ladies as well. I'm sorry if you think that me expressing my opinion and posting in my own way offends you or some unwritten code of TB, but this is how I want to use the boards, and it's my right to.
Cheers!
Believe me, this is not the first BMB that has gotten a side-eye for people posting on it when BFPs aren't even happening for it.
You can make early connections with like minded people, on TTGP/BOTB - the bonus of those boards is that you don't have to keep jumping from BMB to BMB month after month if you don't get a BFP. You can build some really awesome ones and have a "home board" that doesn't change every month.
I just honestly do not see the point of posting on a birth month board when you do not yet know that you will be a part of this board. If I did that, I would have been moving from board to board every month from June 2011 to February 2013.
Why does this bother you so much? And if it's only supposed to be those due in June 2013, why are you posting here. People will post where they like.
BFP#1 09/2009 * EDD 6/19/2010 * Born 6/12/2010
BFP#2 6/03/2012 * EDD 2/09/2013 * MC @ 5w2d 6/13/2012
BFP#3 8/30/2012 * EDD 5/16/2013
LOL I was waiting for the "why are you posting here" silly retort. I'm trying to be helpful and guide people to a better place to post for their situation. Not to mention, the OP called out another board that's actually a great resource for those trying TTGP just doesn't shoot baby dust in your face and tell you to totes test when your nips hurt at 4dpo like other sites. I've visited some of the "nonsnarky" sites mentioned and I worry for those who post there false sense of positives telling people they see a line when clearly there is not is so misleading and tons and tons of improper Clomid dosing and treatment plans. Seriously, you're much better off pulling out the big girl panties and sticking around on TTGP.
Once real June 2013 Moms start here, then you'll get snarked to go back to TTGP and wait your turn but I guess you'd probably just go squat on July 2013 instead.
I never called out a specific board, but rather, just posted a general "boo hoo there are mean people on the bump" post.
TTGP is a wonderful group of people, overall. There are some that jump on the "OMG this has been asked here like a ba-zillion times, you noob, so frickin figure it out!!!1!11!1" and while the OP of the "dumb" questions really could have put more foot work into figuring out their answer(s), they were coming to TTGP for a reason. I too dislike the whole "omg i have all these prego symptoms" messages, but seriously, i just skip over them and move on.
Eh, based on what other BMB have done early in their posts, they didn't jump on the whole "OMG you dont have a BFP yet, so WTF are you here you creeper!" bandwagon. I'm not too worried.
At the end of the day the ladies posting on June 2013 are in the mindset that it's ok to be hopeful and post on this board. There are also some ladies that have expressed their opinions that doing such does not follow the culture of TB, and have made it very clear that is not 'accepted' on TB.
To each her own. Really, can we just agree to disagree and use TB as we see fit? What harm is there in that?
Ladies - don't let it bother you. No matter what is said on this board or that, it won't matter to certain people. They will continue to take out anger, bitterness and aggression here because it is not socially acceptable to do that in the 'real world' (aka - not an internet board).
BFP#1 09/2009 * EDD 6/19/2010 * Born 6/12/2010
BFP#2 6/03/2012 * EDD 2/09/2013 * MC @ 5w2d 6/13/2012
BFP#3 8/30/2012 * EDD 5/16/2013
Please show me where I have been angry, bitter, or aggressive.
I just happened to be lurking the other boards
And I completely agree!!
I did not hang around the TTC boards for that reason- I even called it bullying and got slayed for saying that too. lol.. it is true though and sad. We are all adults- and get that ttc can be frustrating, but we are all here for support!
I do have to say that once you get your bfp and you are on your 2013 month board it does get a bit friendlier
Best wishes to you for your BFP!! Don't let anyone get you down, take it with a grain of salt.
BFP#1 10/1/2011. Our perfect little girl, Her heart stopped @ 12w1d. D&E 11/23/11
BFP#2 3/13/12 Weird CP/Possible EP @ 6w0d
BFP#3 5/28/12 CP @ 5w0d
BFP/WTF#4 10/26/12 CP
BFP#5 12/10/12 EDD 8/23/2013
true dat, yo! for serious!
I agree that some of the comments on here can be down right mean. About a year ago I posted on here, I don't remember which board and had a simple question about if it was safe to mow the yard ( kinda bumpy) and this one reply said " is this a joke, what a stupid question". I even mentioned in the post that I had had 2 m/c in the previous year, so you would think a little compassion would be there. I just wanted to do any and everything to keep that pregnancy. I wish I could reply back to her and say, just to let you know I ended up m/c that one too for #3.
BFP#1 09/2009 * EDD 6/19/2010 * Born 6/12/2010
BFP#2 6/03/2012 * EDD 2/09/2013 * MC @ 5w2d 6/13/2012
BFP#3 8/30/2012 * EDD 5/16/2013
I also just happened to be lurking here, seeing if there were any June 13 BFPs yet. I didn't get any snark at all while I was a newbie. I did once as a bronze poster (I'm guessing - I may have been silver already, don't remember) because I posted something stupid. Whether you get snarky responses has nothing to do with whether you've got the "newbie" badge. It has to do with the questions you ask and responses you give. Are you asking questions that can be answered in 5 seconds by google? Or have you done your research but still can't find the answer? Are your responses well-informed or are you just relating what your SIL's cousin's acupuncturist (nothing against acupuncture) said and trying to say it's the ultimate truth?
BFP1: DD1 born April 2011 at 34w1d via unplanned c/s due to HELLP, DVT 1 week PP
BFP3: DD2 born Feb 2013 at 38w4d via unplanned RCS due to uterine dehiscence