My friend had a baby and got an epidural and she is overweight, and her husband was all like yeah we had to sign all this stuff because its more dangerous if you weigh a certain amount. I want to know why they were discussing her weight ... and I thought everyone had to sign forms?
anyway, I have no idea why he just blurted that out and was really tactless, but I wanted to know if they discuss your weight at depth in the delivery room. I mean I am not shy or whatever, but obvs have gained weight with pregnancy and I don't need my husband to be learning how much lol. (its not a lot, but still, men get stupid ideas about stuff like "omg she gained weight" even though it doesn't make that much of a difference, I only gained 20 pounds)
Re: Do they talk about your weight when getting an epidural? +
I'd be PISSED if MH made a comment about my weight while carrying his child! I'm not sure about them asking during the epidural but just wanted to mention how mad I'd be
Cooper Edward
9.25.12
yeah he definitely said that she had to sign special forms because she was overweight..so I'm wondering if the anesthesiologist said something?? I have no idea. anyway, it was a really uncomfortable convo..like she was overweight before getting pregnant and gained a ton, so why would he be focusing on her weight ...
I haven't gained that much so far, and I'm not a big girl, but I still think its gross to discuss your weight in front of your husband..like none of his business! if he thinks you look good, then that's enough. I find that most people don't know what weight looks like ...and wouldnt' be able to guess a person's weight anyway, but when you put the pregnancy gain number on a person, they can be like WHOA that's a lot or something. when you look fine...you know? I dunno anyway, just thought it was super weird.
I just had to sign the form. No one mentioned weight while at the hospital.
And I'm pretty sure you aren't giving husbands enough credit. Every time I make a comment about my weight, (I get on the scale every couple of nights and announce it) DH says "You are growing and carrying our baby! You look beautiful!" I would punch any husband if he said something so crass to me or any other women.
Also, I just read an article in Glamour that actually discussed how men actually don't think women should be as skinny as we think we need to be, that they like a healthy look :-) Don't underestimate how beautiful your husband thinks you are.
I wouldn't think it was unusual at all for an anesthesiologist to ask and know your weight. In fact, I'd be concerned if they didn't. Not everyone gets the same dosage. A person who weighs more is likely going to need a higher dose of meds.
Also, if my H had an issue with how much weight I've gained, he can kiss my @$$! I was just telling my H the other day that I'm pretty sure I weigh more than him now I take comfort in the fact that he's only 2" taller than me and not a very big guy.
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Any husband who is actually bothered by his wife gaining weight in pregnancy deserves to be left and given child support orders as a parting gift. And wives who freak out over pregnancy weight gain in relation to letting their husbands see them or know what they've gained weight really just need to... stop. Seriously, stop. I can't believe there are women who want to be pregnant and then cannot differentiate between becoming obese from liking food too much (hey, like me!) and gaining some weight because they are carrying and growing another human being. Seriously, you're PREGNANT. You are going to grow. If you are truly concerned about the person you married finding out how much weight you have gained while carrying his child, you really need to rethink your choice of partner, because any man who is actually bothered by that will only pose more problems down the road.
Like PP said, I can see weight playing a role in how much anesthetic they give you. I know it's a huge factor in general anesthesia--the amount I would need to be completely knocked out, for instance, could probably kill a much smaller person; just like if I was given the amount that a smaller person needs, I might be wide awake. Not that epidural = general anesthesia and therefore possible death, but I can see the need for heavier people to be given more medication in order for it to be affective (think about children's dosages of medicine vs. adult doses, etc). And as far as I know there are always forms to sign with epidurals, no matter what you weigh.
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This. With DS, they asked me how much I weighed at my last OB appointment. It had nothing to do with being overweight (I was borderline underweight to start and gained about 35 lbs). I didn't ask but assumed it was to administer the correct dosage.
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A thousand times this! WTF?
This!!!!!!
pregnancy and childbirth are more risky when you're overweight, including the epidural. However, who gives a *** if your husband is in on the conversation? You're pregnant, it's too late to do much about the weight gain now.
I just signed regular consent forms. I do not remember a conversation about my weight but I don't remember much more than saying "please give me the epidural now!"
I have no experience with the epidural, but regarding the OPs comments on sharing the weight gain numbers with DH...
While I do agree that some people get hung up on numbers rather than health/how the person actually looks, when it comes to pregnancy, gaining weight is just something that comes with the territory and if a person is that hung up on numbers that they can't process that these numbers are coming from growing a human being, it's a little worrisome.
Other than that, as PPs said, I believe weight would be discussed in relation to the amount of medicine used, etc.
Sometimes, I'm hilarious.
Uh my husband and I have a great relationship and he even administered my strep b swab for me, so I have NO squeemishness about him seeing whatever. That I could care less about. I just think he doesn't need to know my numerical weight. So what?
I also has a miscarriage and bled out everywhere, he has seen me "unglamourous" you people are ridiculous. I don't plan on wearing makeup and doing my hair for labour.
And, I am not prissy, or weird about fluids or recovery from surgeries etc. I have no issues with being seen at a bad moment, I just don't want a number being put on my weight, I think that carries a bigger stigma than anything else. Like when my friend's husband (the one in the story) found out she weighed more than 200 lbs he judged her. HARD. And before he knew that, he was fine with how she was..there is a mental judgey ness about weight whether you ladies want to believe it or not.
Some husbands will have no issue with the blood, gore etc. that comes with it, but WILL to having a wife over 200 lbs. Sorry, just facts.
...Just facts that certain men are pigs. If you are married to someone like that then I feel sorry for you. The actual number of your weight should have no bearing on how your husband feels for you. I'm sorry if he is really THAT vain that you feel you have to hide your weight from him.