Community› The Bump Message Boards› TTC After a Loss
TTC After a Loss
New Discussion

FB vent (pregnancy mentioned)

ebwhitebwhit member
in TTC After a Loss

So a girl I went to HS with that I actually adore announced her pregnancy on FB over a month ago and her due date is only a few days from mine. At the time I was still pregnant but shocked at her decision to have announced it so early on. She was only like 6 weeks! She is constantly posting about the pregnancy and it doesn't bother me so much that I would block her but it bothers me irrationally that she was the one who was so confident in her pregnancy that she announced it to the world super early. It seems like the outpouring of congratulations insulated her from going through what I did. We hadn't even had a chance to tell our parents. I know this is crazy and something could, god forbid, still happen to her lo but it just really annoys me and I had to complain about it. I just want to reach through the computer and shake her by the shoulders until she understands that what happened to me could happen to her too! Vent over.

Daisypath Anniversary tickers
ME (26) DH (32) Diagnosis- unexplained recurrent pregnancy loss
BFP #1 7/12- MC 8w.3d
BFP #2 10/12- CP 
BFP #3 1/13 - CP
BFP #4 8/13- MC 6w3d
IUI #1 50mg Clomid/Ovidrel 1/13-BFN
IUI #2 2/14 100MG Clomid/Ovidrel- BFP! grow baby grow

Report Reply to Post

Re: FB vent (pregnancy mentioned)

  • rlajamberlajambe member

    Ah, blissful ignorance, I remember it so well.

    Nobody thinks it would happen to them.  Nobody wants to imagine the worst.  Hopefully, she has uneventful pregnancy and doesn't need know our pain.  Be kind and leave her in her ignorance.

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers

    imageimage
    BFP #1 - 01/12/12, EDD 09/12/12, Medical Induction @ 21 weeks 05/03/12
    BFP #2 - 10/30/12, EDD 07/04/13, Natural m/c @ 5 weeks 11/01/12
    BFP #3 - 02/07/13, EDD 10/12/13
    Dx: Incompotent Cervix

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickersLilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    image

    Report Reply
  • Loading the player...
  • LLPtobeLLPtobe member
    imagerlajambe:

    Ah, blissful ignorance, I remember it so well.

    Nobody thinks it would happen to them.  Nobody wants to imagine the worst. 

    This was so me...Although I hadn't announced on fb yet, thankfully. But I totally get where you're coming from. (((hugs)))

    July TTCAL Siggy Challenge - Favorite Children's Book
    Donkey-Donkey - Roger Duvoisin 1968 Vintage Childrens Book
    Surprise BFP 5/15/12, EDD 1/29/13, mm/c @ 8wks, discovered at 11wks, D&C 7/11/12
    AF finally arrived on Christmas after 167 days of waiting.
    TTA until January 2014
    Follow Me on Pinterestimageimage
    PGAL/PAL always welcome

    Report Reply
  • RachaeleighRachaeleigh member
    Yep, all of what pp have said. I get angry about not being blissfully ignorant anymore. We were all on a camping trip in May when my BFF found out she was expecting her third (found out as in she poas and it came up positive after she had received several negatives days before). She then told everyone. And posted her 6 week u/s on FB weeks later. Ugh...

    4 Losses (2003, 2008, Apr 2012, & Oct 2012)
    All RPL and IF testing with multiple REs = normal

    5 IUIs = BFN

    All AL are welcome
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    Report Reply
  • ravenclaw1ravenclaw1 member

    that is annoying

    I am SO happy we didn't "go public". the thought of having to go through this with the entire FB world makes me ill. 

    BFP #1 - Mango - 6/11/12, EDD 2/22/12 Natural MC 7/15/12
    BFP #2 - Nacho - 10/14/12, EDD 6/20/13, MMC 8 weeks, D&C 11/16/12
    All testing shows both H and I are perfectly normal. Baby Nacho had triploidy. 
    Back to normal business December 2012
    BFP #3 - Froggy - 1/15/13, EDD 9/27/13 TEAM GREEN
    It's a girl! Alice - Born 9/20/13, 8lbs 2oz

    imageimage
    Report Reply
  • Adam2010Adam2010 member
    so sorry you are going through this, hun. Just know most of us feel your pain :( big hugs to you!
    Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Fourth Birthday tickers
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers Daisypath Friendship tickers
    TTC #2 Since October 2011
    RE testing results: DH- normal ME- DX:PCOS and One copy of MTHFR gene
    IUI#1 Sept/Oct 2012-Follistim, Ovidrel, Metformin, Baby Asprin, Lovenox, Crinone, and Neevo Beta 10/24=BFN
    No 2nd IUI but instead TI with Metformin, Baby Asprin, Neevo and Prometrium
    BFP #4 5/4/13-EDD 1/19/14- grow little one, grow!
    Beta #1@15DPO HCG-95, progesterone-25 Beta #4@24DPO HCG-2498, progesterone-30, 1st U/S 6mm,133BPM 2nd U/S 1.6cm, 167 BPM
    Chart
    Lilypie Maternity tickers Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    ~*~*~*~Everyone Welcome~*~*~*~
    Report Reply
  • D&S724D&S724 member
    imagerlajambe:

    Ah, blissful ignorance, I remember it so well.

    Nobody thinks it would happen to them.  Nobody wants to imagine the worst.  Hopefully, she has uneventful pregnancy and doesn't need know our pain.  Be kind and leave her in her ignorance.

     Well said.

     I have seen a few FB pregnancy announcements by women who are due around the same time I was, and it hurts.  I made the mistake of telling people too early (not on FB), and if I get pregnant again, I'd do it differently. The process of un-telling everyone is just so painful.

    Mommy of 3 beautiful boys!
    image.
    Report Reply
  • frogs007frogs007

    I'm sorry.  I go through this process too, for me the big kicker is when people announce after 12 weeks and comment on the "safe" zone.  I guess it bugs me that people think everything will be fine after the first trimester and I'll never be able to feel that again.  Hugs.

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers My Blog
    Report Reply
  • HoolahZingerHoolahZinger member
    I had a friend who did that early on and then had to un-tell the FB world. It was heartbreaking to see her have to go through that on top of the painful loss. I hope you friend can stay in ignorant bliss and never have to go through this nightmare. 
    imageimage
    image

    EDD 1/31/13, MC May 17. EDD 3/31/13, MC July 26. I miss you so much already my angel loves

    image

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Report Reply
  • hellotarrahellotarra

    My FB is intimate so I had no problems announcing when we got high HCG levels and blood test confirmation. It's been awhile since my first loss and it was weird so this was our first together and it felt like a different kind of loss.  I posted my 8w u/s and everything was fine for a week. Honestly, I wasn't embarrassed to tell people that our baby didn't make it, it was much more comfortable to do it electronically. I am more dreading telling people that don't have Facebook or I'm not friends with. I was outed at school and I am not friends with a lot of the younger students esp.

    So yeah, I was probably that jerk, but I wouldn't judge people for doing what was right for them. There was one person that judged me for telling before 1st Tri was over and it hurt my feelings a lot. Plus the outpouring of love and support on my Facebook has really helped my healing. Knowing so many people care about me eases the pain a little.

    Serious Business. August Siggy contest:
    image
    hellotarraLuna
    The artist formerly known as Sunbird
    Read my blog! hellotarra.com
    Report Reply
  • Becky&JamesBecky&James member
    Our first one I told everyone!  Facebook, people at work, friends, relatives.  Our second one we told a very select few so I didn't have to untell everyone when the time came.  
    TTC 03/2011 several rounds of Clomid BFP 11/02/2011 blighted ovum Dx 11/23 - Cytotec 12/07 miscarried 12/26 BFP 04/01/2012 stopped growing six weeks - natural miscarriage 05/27 BFP 09/28/2015 image
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"