FB vent (pregnancy mentioned)

ebwhit

So a girl I went to HS with that I actually adore announced her pregnancy on FB over a month ago and her due date is only a few days from mine. At the time I was still pregnant but shocked at her decision to have announced it so early on. She was only like 6 weeks! She is constantly posting about the pregnancy and it doesn't bother me so much that I would block her but it bothers me irrationally that she was the one who was so confident in her pregnancy that she announced it to the world super early. It seems like the outpouring of congratulations insulated her from going through what I did. We hadn't even had a chance to tell our parents. I know this is crazy and something could, god forbid, still happen to her lo but it just really annoys me and I had to complain about it. I just want to reach through the computer and shake her by the shoulders until she understands that what happened to me could happen to her too! Vent over.

rlajambe

Ah, blissful ignorance, I remember it so well.

Nobody thinks it would happen to them.  Nobody wants to imagine the worst.  Hopefully, she has uneventful pregnancy and doesn't need know our pain.  Be kind and leave her in her ignorance.

LLPtobe

rlajambe:

Ah, blissful ignorance, I remember it so well.

Nobody thinks it would happen to them.  Nobody wants to imagine the worst. 

This was so me...Although I hadn't announced on fb yet, thankfully. But I totally get where you're coming from. (((hugs)))

Rachaeleigh

Yep, all of what pp have said. I get angry about not being blissfully ignorant anymore. We were all on a camping trip in May when my BFF found out she was expecting her third (found out as in she poas and it came up positive after she had received several negatives days before). She then told everyone. And posted her 6 week u/s on FB weeks later. Ugh...

ravenclaw1

that is annoying

I am SO happy we didn't "go public". the thought of having to go through this with the entire FB world makes me ill. 

Adam2010

so sorry you are going through this, hun. Just know most of us feel your pain big hugs to you!

D&S724

rlajambe:

Ah, blissful ignorance, I remember it so well.

Nobody thinks it would happen to them.  Nobody wants to imagine the worst.  Hopefully, she has uneventful pregnancy and doesn't need know our pain.  Be kind and leave her in her ignorance.

 Well said.

 I have seen a few FB pregnancy announcements by women who are due around the same time I was, and it hurts.  I made the mistake of telling people too early (not on FB), and if I get pregnant again, I'd do it differently. The process of un-telling everyone is just so painful.

frogs007

I'm sorry.  I go through this process too, for me the big kicker is when people announce after 12 weeks and comment on the "safe" zone.  I guess it bugs me that people think everything will be fine after the first trimester and I'll never be able to feel that again.  Hugs.

HoolahZinger

I had a friend who did that early on and then had to un-tell the FB world. It was heartbreaking to see her have to go through that on top of the painful loss. I hope you friend can stay in ignorant bliss and never have to go through this nightmare. 

hellotarra

My FB is intimate so I had no problems announcing when we got high HCG levels and blood test confirmation. It's been awhile since my first loss and it was weird so this was our first together and it felt like a different kind of loss.  I posted my 8w u/s and everything was fine for a week. Honestly, I wasn't embarrassed to tell people that our baby didn't make it, it was much more comfortable to do it electronically. I am more dreading telling people that don't have Facebook or I'm not friends with. I was outed at school and I am not friends with a lot of the younger students esp.

So yeah, I was probably that jerk, but I wouldn't judge people for doing what was right for them. There was one person that judged me for telling before 1st Tri was over and it hurt my feelings a lot. Plus the outpouring of love and support on my Facebook has really helped my healing. Knowing so many people care about me eases the pain a little.

Becky&James

Our first one I told everyone!  Facebook, people at work, friends, relatives.  Our second one we told a very select few so I didn't have to untell everyone when the time came.