It appears I shall be versed in another aspect of healthcare.. — The Bump
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It appears I shall be versed in another aspect of healthcare..

Palliative.  

My mother, whom I'm not particularly close to (both her and my father were addicted to drugs and left me about 15 years ago, my grandparents raised me) is at a hospital in DC.  She has lung cancer, which I knew about but what I didn't know was that the lung cancer is a metastasis from colon cancer, and that tumor is huge.  Yesterday she was taken to the hospital and they thought she may have had an abscess in her brain or that the cancer had spread.  So mad at myself for clinging to hope that it was an abscess, MRI came back that it is a metastasis.  She's in and out of being lucid.  She didn't know who I was yesterday.  Her mouth is nothing but sores and her lips are literally going to fall off.  She hasn't eat or drank in days.  Her INR was through the roof, she wont' clot, had to do platelet and blood transfusions.  

No one knows what to do, and here I am having to make MORE medical decisions and it Fing sucks.  My dad's a mess but obviously he can't take care of her if she got to that state, and now i'm trying to figure out if she has DC medicaid or medicare or hospice and my head is SPINNING. 

DD1(4):VSD & PFO (Closed!), Prenatal stroke, Mild CP, Delayed pyloric opening/reflux, Brachycephaly & Plagiocephaly, Sacral lipoma, Tethered spinal cord, Compound heterozygous MTHFR, Neurogenic bladder, Urinary retention & dyssynergia, incomplete emptying, enlarged Bladder with Poor Muscle Tone, EDS-Type 3. Mito-Disorder has been mentioned

DD2(2.5): Late term premie due to PTL, low fluid & IUGR, Reflux, delayed visual maturation, compound heteroygous MTHFR, PFAPA, Bilateral kidney reflux, Transient hypogammaglobulinemia, EDS-Type 3


Re: It appears I shall be versed in another aspect of healthcare..

  • image-auntie-:

    I am so, so sorry. It's hard to make medical choices for parents under the best of circumstances; when the relationship is complicate dby a history like yours, it is just unfair.

    This was interesting to me-

    http://www.nytimes.com/2012/07/29/fashion/the-father-is-child-of-the-man.html?pagewanted=all

     

     

    Auntie, that was very interesting.  My parents have both been attempting to receive some type of forgiveness from me over the last year or so.  I have not seen my father since they left (it was because of him she left-legal/law issues) but she could have stayed, easily.  She chose him over me.  Regardless she came home a couple of times a year, etc.  I am so angry, and H doesn't understand it's not just that she's dying.  I'm mourning the loss of never having her, and that I never WILL.  Their are 'normal' mother/daughter relationships through all ages of life.  I am so jealous when people say their mom went with them and their LO's to target, or mom this/mom that.  SO JEALOUS.  My grandparents are in their upper 70's & 80's.  I know they won't be here forever (they have 4 children, though and even though I was raised as their own, that won't all fall on me, well I guess they will have 3 left.)  I'm an only child.  It just really sucks to see her like this and to think that it may drag on.  We finally had a break in appointments, and i'm going back to school Fall semester, and now...this.  

    DD1(4):VSD & PFO (Closed!), Prenatal stroke, Mild CP, Delayed pyloric opening/reflux, Brachycephaly & Plagiocephaly, Sacral lipoma, Tethered spinal cord, Compound heterozygous MTHFR, Neurogenic bladder, Urinary retention & dyssynergia, incomplete emptying, enlarged Bladder with Poor Muscle Tone, EDS-Type 3. Mito-Disorder has been mentioned

    DD2(2.5): Late term premie due to PTL, low fluid & IUGR, Reflux, delayed visual maturation, compound heteroygous MTHFR, PFAPA, Bilateral kidney reflux, Transient hypogammaglobulinemia, EDS-Type 3


  • Sorry to hear RD, you really need a giant group hug. Left Hug


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  • Girl...it's about time life stops throwing punches your way!  You've already earned a gold medal in boxing!  They don't make a platinum one!  HUGE HUGS!
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