Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: AW: Im so tired of stupid people
Yuck. So sorry to hear this. I grew up in a town of 2000, so I hear you.
OH MY GOD!!! are you kidding me ... WTF.... I am flaming mad FLAMING for you.
UGGG !
our Blog -http://dosbabies.wordpress.com/
This disgusts me. People are so *insert very inappropriate word here*
I am so sorry you are going through this!
Blogs: Our Growing Family - CT Working Moms
I know, me either. I live in such an insulated world that I forget that there are other places in this country that people think *and say* this crap. I am so sorry.
Ugh, that is so awful. Your family values are lacking? In a text message? Seriously? Never mind the utter ridiculousness of worrying about their children's safety with someone who is SO CLEARLY DEVOTED TO THEIR CHILDREN as a coach for four years.
I realize this is probably an inappropriate moment for humor, but they know it's SOFTBALL, right? If their kids keep playing, they might want to get used to lesbian coaches.
AMH 0.5, AFC 5-8, FSH 7ish
IVF #1 - antagonist. Empty follicle syndrome. 1 retrieved, 0 fertilized.
IVF #2 - antagonist. Ovulated early. 3 retrieved, 2 fertilized, 0 blasts
That is absolutely disgusting. If I had my child on that team, my child would not be on the team after this.
I worry about crap like this, though. Once my partner is officially transitioning and even fully transitioned to being my wife, I don't know how others will handle it. It's one reason why we know it is extremely important for us to stay IN Chicago, in the city, no matter what. I feel that it's the safest possible place for us to be, even though we're struggling financially and really can't pay our rent (horrifically underemployed). Family (who has no idea about the gender issue, and won't for a while) doesn't understand why we won't just "move back" (although we have no money to do so, no place to go, and no jobs to go to--staying with family is NOT an option, either), so we have to just keep saying "no, we're staying here" and taking loads of verbal abuse for our decision to stay put. But put simply, we have no choice but to stay here, because this is probably the best shot we have at being accepted and validated as a family. Under no circumstances do I want to end up living somewhere where our daughter will be ridiculed for having a mom who "used to be her dad." I'm not saying it won't happen here but I don't think it will be on as large a scale and I know for a fact that we WILL have support here; we already do.
Even though I've only been away from small town conservatism for almost 4 years, I really do forget how bad it can be. Days where my partner is presenting as my wife, we often have to stop ourselves and think about where we are going, if we have to go to the suburbs for something, how the clothing looks, etc. When I read this post my initial reaction was "seriously? what?" but then it hit me; I got away from places like that for a reason, and that crap still actually happens for some completely unknown reason. I really don't like people most of the time.
blog! thescenery.net
Is it sad that I have no idea what to do with myself now because I don't coach? J kept texting me and asking if I was okay and I honestly was just so shocked that I didn't know what to say. Now it's all kind of hitting me. I love those girls and devoted so much time that I can't believe their parents would just take that from me. *sigh*
This is why I always say I can't wait to move. We have plans to move outside of D.C. but not for four years (when our student loans will be paid off) because the cost of living is so low here. I currently live in a 3 bedroom, 1800 sq ft house for 450 a month lol I know I'll find ignorance everywhere but it won't be as prominent. As you all have said, you forget that there are people like this in the world because you don't face it everyday. I hate having to "feel" people out before I can say that I'm married to a woman. It's just getting so tiring, I'm hoping I can make it four more years. I just know that I don't want my children growing up here and having to endure constant bullying because they come from an interracial same sex household.
This was me..for some reason I was logged in under my wife's name and it took me awhile to notice.