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Baby Showers
Kristine822
member
Who's hosting? Houston we have a problem..
Kristine822
member
in Baby Showers
My family is already 100% decided upon throwing me a baby shower. I am so grateful to have a big wonderful caring family, and I already know we will literally be showered with gifts, we are SO blessed!
My problem lies here: My stepmother is being somewhat controlling about being the only "host" of the shower. My mother and sister want to be included as hosts and have all 3 of them plan it together. (my mother and sister are very close to my stepmother. My family is all very close -they even live 4 houses down from each other and we do holidays together - where I should note, dad and stepmom usually host because they are the good cooks of the family, so it's natural for her)
My stepmom has made some comments about my mom not being "allowed" to host because she's the grandmother and it's tradition or whatnot (btw, I don't care about tradition), and said "she's got it covered" and she's getting together with her best friend (who I know, but is not close with me or the rest of my family) to get stuff together for the shower.
Is it wrong of me to want to bring this issue up to my stepmom and ask her to please not fight the inclusion of my mother and sister in my shower? I feel weird about deciding who to host my shower - the shower in itself is a gift, but there is absolutely no way I want to have this split into a 2 shower ordeal, there are too many mutual friends and close family members and I'm not double inviting people, etc.
I also feel that my mom and sister understand my taste better and know more of what I would feel comfortable with. We are not very traditional, and I have many male friends who will be invited, so I don't want a super girly-traditional shower. I'd rather have a get together with food, friends, and family - no silly games, no frilly tea parties, and I just have a feeling my stepmother is already thinking in this direction.
What do I do?!
My problem lies here: My stepmother is being somewhat controlling about being the only "host" of the shower. My mother and sister want to be included as hosts and have all 3 of them plan it together. (my mother and sister are very close to my stepmother. My family is all very close -they even live 4 houses down from each other and we do holidays together - where I should note, dad and stepmom usually host because they are the good cooks of the family, so it's natural for her)
My stepmom has made some comments about my mom not being "allowed" to host because she's the grandmother and it's tradition or whatnot (btw, I don't care about tradition), and said "she's got it covered" and she's getting together with her best friend (who I know, but is not close with me or the rest of my family) to get stuff together for the shower.
Is it wrong of me to want to bring this issue up to my stepmom and ask her to please not fight the inclusion of my mother and sister in my shower? I feel weird about deciding who to host my shower - the shower in itself is a gift, but there is absolutely no way I want to have this split into a 2 shower ordeal, there are too many mutual friends and close family members and I'm not double inviting people, etc.
I also feel that my mom and sister understand my taste better and know more of what I would feel comfortable with. We are not very traditional, and I have many male friends who will be invited, so I don't want a super girly-traditional shower. I'd rather have a get together with food, friends, and family - no silly games, no frilly tea parties, and I just have a feeling my stepmother is already thinking in this direction.
What do I do?!
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Re: Who's hosting? Houston we have a problem..
This is probably the best idea but can I also add in that technically she's a grandmother for the baby too
All of this.
Technically your step mom is right: Family members do not throw showers because it looks gift-grabby. Showers should only be thrown by those outside the family. But this rule also excludes step mom from throwing it!
The way around this is to make sure that this is a family-only shower. Then it's ok for family members to throw it, and then go ahead and sit down with step mom and ask her to somehow incorporate your mom & sis. Although if it were me, I'd let them work it out on their own, as the honoree you can't really dictate who does what.