The girl who thinks it's gross- update

nurrieum · July 2012

Well, that night my MW came over to check me (technically we're having a hospital birth and there she will act as my doula, however she is a direct entry mid-wife and is trained to do checking etc). I'd been having solid painful contractions 4 mins apart for 6 hours- she checked me- I was 100% effaced and dilated 2cm. However she noted that while the baby's head is fully engaged his head is not bearing down on my cervix yet. ggggrreeeaaattt shortly after- the contractions slowed and became less painful.

The next night contractions started up again- pain in my back, menstrual like cramping, my whole belly tightening and pulling inward and down, cervical pain. These started slowly around 1am- I was able to sleep but they would wake me up and this continued until 9am- by my OB appointment at 10 that morning- once again they were basically non-existent.

Here I was gearing up getting ready for the grossness and everything- and it would stop. I struggled with getting really frustrated and upset and angry. I don't want to be induced and my OB has yet to suggest that (my due date is July 7- tomorrow) or any form of augmentation (which is cool with me because as per my birth plan I didn't want any until I was 41 and a half weeks).

I've felt really stupid (I'm a FTM so I don't know what labor feels like but when the signs are there and it's lasting for hours!) I'm doing my best to stay calm and remember that this baby will happen when it's time- or at least by a certain point the doctors will encourage his debut into the world. My mom kept posting things on facebook about it (really drove me nuts) because I would have to reply to people- no- no baby yet.

As far as how I feel about the gross factor- part of it still bothers me but honestly I feel like i've been teased by my body and I just want this child to come out!!!!! lol I'm a bit curious to see how I'll react once it's all really happening though.

My husband made a pretty cute comment to me: "I have this deep fear that when your water breaks you aren't going to tell me until you're done cleaning it up!" LOL

LaurelBee · July 2012

Same thing happened to me! I had regular painful contractions for 2 weeks leading up to my labor. (Delivered at 39w1d) It's a total mind fvvck!! Take a hot shower, if the contrax slow, it's a falsie

GL mama!

nurrieum · July 2012

LaurelBee:
Same thing happened to me! I had regular painful contractions for 2 weeks leading up to my labor. (Delivered at 39w1d) It's a total mind fvvck!! Take a hot shower, if the contrax slow, it's a falsie GL mama!

They weren't slowing with a warm bath- walking- laying down- anything. My MW thinks that they weren't BH, however did warn me they could stop. They did. It sucked. I hoping this doesn't last too much longer.

KayaXavier · July 2012

Hang in there, mama. Don't feel dumb, I'm a STM, and I'm not even sure how I'm going to know I'm in labor, its so different every time. Its great that you are feeling so much change because you probably won't have to worry about giving in to augmentation. Good luck on getting the natural birth you are hoping for. It's going to be totally gross but you can do it!

nurrieum · July 2012

KayaXavier:
Hang in there, mama. Don't feel dumb, I'm a STM, and I'm not even sure how I'm going to know I'm in labor, its so different every time. Its great that you are feeling so much change because you probably won't have to worry about giving in to augmentation. Good luck on getting the natural birth you are hoping for. It's going to be totally gross but you can do it!

Thank you for the encouragement

danienross · July 2012

I'm a STM who will have no clue how to know if I'm in labor. I had contractions for seven weeks prior to my induction last time. So not only did I have false alarms, I never even got to start labor on my own (office policy was to not go past 41wks).

Hang in there. It sounds like your body is doing a lot of prep work and that's a good thing.

KateLouise · July 2012

DD2 totally messed with me, by giving steady painful contractions and then just stopping. I was a STM, and still didn't really know what was happening.

Try and get heaps of rest, and nourish and hydrate yourself.

Can't wait to read your birth story and see how the "grossness" works out for you.

FWIW to my mind birth isn't "pretty" but it's friggin amazing, and none of the gross stuff matters. At the same time I remember that before I gave birth the idea that I might poo in front of people was not made better by the thought that I wouldn't care. WTF?? I'll be pooing in front of people, and not caring?? What on earth can be happening that I'm not caring?

Answer: Something painful, exhausting, beautiful, overwhelming and just friggin amazing.

Good luck :-)

dosafyre · July 2012

This is why I was actually kind of relieved when my water broke all over the floor the second time...there was no doubt the it was "game on" that time!

mmmhilary · July 2012

This happened to me for 6 weeks before my sone was born at 39 weeks 6 days. When I was before 37 weeks they actually gave me medicine to stop my contractions! My midwife thinks that he was sunny side up all that time, and my body was keeping him from truely getting things going. Her theory is that when he finally turned, labor was fast and furious from then on. I could barely talk/walk through what I call my "first labor contraction." I knew instantly that it was NOT a false alarm. GL mama. I know it's hard. I even called my dad over seas to tell him I was in labor, and then had to call him back and say nevermind.

nurrieum · July 2012

KateLouise:
DD2 totally messed with me, by giving steady painful contractions and then just stopping. I was a STM, and still didn't really know what was happening.
Try and get heaps of rest, and nourish and hydrate yourself.
Can't wait to read your birth story and see how the "grossness" works out for you.
FWIW to my mind birth isn't "pretty" but it's friggin amazing, and none of the gross stuff matters. At the same time I remember that before I gave birth the idea that I might poo in front of people was not made better by the thought that I wouldn't care. WTF?? I'll be pooing in front of people, and not caring?? What on earth can be happening that I'm not caring?
Answer: Something painful, exhausting, beautiful, overwhelming and just friggin amazing.
Good luck :-)

Thank you for the encouragement and kind words!

Yeah I started to have some really painful pulling contrax today- but they stopped so I didn't get my hopes up! lol Basically just waiting until my water breaks lol (praying to God that it does!) My DH has been wonderful about letting me get tons of rest and being incredibly helpful with SS.

I'm a little interested myself to see how I will feel at the end. I saw a photo once of a woman pulling her child out screaming "I love you" at the top of her lungs and I was like "that's not going to be me. I'll do something ridiculous." My mom was saying how beautiful the photo was, I was just like "AUGH! that looks awfully unpleasant." My DH has already been there with my SS though it was not a natural birth (induce/epi) so at least he's prepared for a vaginal delivery. That helps- I think he's most worried about being helpless to do anything when I'm in pain. We both have a dry odd sense of humor though, so I'm wondering how that will come out. My MW has told us some funny stories of angry women during transition. Everyone thinks it's funny that I'm a huge advocate for natural and home births and seeing my reaction to things upon getting pregnant as the realization slowly dawns on me- "Oh dear Gawd- and I'm doing it that way!" I have received a lot of encouragement and am really committed to having a natural birth despite my adverseness to the ickyness!

nurrieum · July 2012

mmmhilary:
This happened to me for 6 weeks before my sone was born at 39 weeks 6 days. When I was before 37 weeks they actually gave me medicine to stop my contractions! My midwife thinks that he was sunny side up all that time, and my body was keeping him from truely getting things going. Her theory is that when he finally turned, labor was fast and furious from then on. I could barely talk/walk through what I call my "first labor contraction." I knew instantly that it was NOT a false alarm. GL mama. I know it's hard. I even called my dad over seas to tell him I was in labor, and then had to call him back and say nevermind.

Thank you!! My MW has told me that his back is facing my belly and the way his head is in my pelvis he's going to need some good contrax to get him down onto my cervix. She is confident that natural labor will start though. I appreciate the story- I hope I know that fast myself! Thanks for the encouragement! It means a lot!

CTri17 · July 2012

can you go to the chiro and make sure everything is in alignment.

Also, check out the pelvic floor release on spinning babies

https://spinningbabies.com/techniques/activities-for-fetal-positioning/pelvic-floor-release

kali55 · July 2012

nurrieum:
KateLouise:
DD2 totally messed with me, by giving steady painful contractions and then just stopping. I was a STM, and still didn't really know what was happening.
Try and get heaps of rest, and nourish and hydrate yourself.
Can't wait to read your birth story and see how the "grossness" works out for you.
FWIW to my mind birth isn't "pretty" but it's friggin amazing, and none of the gross stuff matters. At the same time I remember that before I gave birth the idea that I might poo in front of people was not made better by the thought that I wouldn't care. WTF?? I'll be pooing in front of people, and not caring?? What on earth can be happening that I'm not caring?
Answer: Something painful, exhausting, beautiful, overwhelming and just friggin amazing.
Good luck :-)
Thank you for the encouragement and kind words!
Yeah I started to have some really painful pulling contrax today- but they stopped so I didn't get my hopes up! lol Basically just waiting until my water breaks lol (praying to God that it does!) My DH has been wonderful about letting me get tons of rest and being incredibly helpful with SS.
I'm a little interested myself to see how I will feel at the end. I saw a photo once of a woman pulling her child out screaming "I love you" at the top of her lungs and I was like "that's not going to be me. I'll do something ridiculous." My mom was saying how beautiful the photo was, I was just like "AUGH! that looks awfully unpleasant." My DH has already been there with my SS though it was not a natural birth (induce/epi) so at least he's prepared for a vaginal delivery. That helps- I think he's most worried about being helpless to do anything when I'm in pain. We both have a dry odd sense of humor though, so I'm wondering how that will come out. My MW has told us some funny stories of angry women during transition. Everyone thinks it's funny that I'm a huge advocate for natural and home births and seeing my reaction to things upon getting pregnant as the realization slowly dawns on me- "Oh dear Gawd- and I'm doing it that way!" I have received a lot of encouragement and am really committed to having a natural birth despite my adverseness to the ickyness!

I had a natural at home birth and I ended up pushing for nearly 3 hours (my MW explained that they will only let you push for a maximum of three hours and then you get cut) and I was so tired and I yelled at one point "get this little f-er out of me". Not exactly a beautiful moment. Lol. But when they put him on my chest... Wow... It was worth all that labour and more. Im not a religious person but it really does feel like god is in the room.

Best of luck and you can totally do this. You were built for this! I had a similar situation with DH, as he has two daughters, both were epi births. He found he was A LOT more involved, because I needed him to be with me through each contraction. He was physically worn out when DS was born.

Tampasomedaybride · July 2012

nurrieum:
LaurelBee:
Same thing happened to me! I had regular painful contractions for 2 weeks leading up to my labor. (Delivered at 39w1d) It's a total mind fvvck!! Take a hot shower, if the contrax slow, it's a falsie GL mama!
They weren't slowing with a warm bath- walking- laying down- anything. My MW thinks that they weren't BH, however did warn me they could stop. They did. It sucked. I hoping this doesn't last too much longer.

Sounds like Prodromal labor or "false labor." Its basically the bodies way of "warming up" for the birth. THey are similar to Braxton Hicks in that they are the bodies way of practicing. But they are actual real contractions. Think of it this way. If your body continues with prodromal labor there is a very good chance that you may have a quick and maybe easy labor since your body will hopefully be all ready to go when real labor starts. Hang in there!

nurrieum · July 2012

Tampasomedaybride:
nurrieum:
LaurelBee:
Same thing happened to me! I had regular painful contractions for 2 weeks leading up to my labor. (Delivered at 39w1d) It's a total mind fvvck!! Take a hot shower, if the contrax slow, it's a falsie GL mama!
They weren't slowing with a warm bath- walking- laying down- anything. My MW thinks that they weren't BH, however did warn me they could stop. They did. It sucked. I hoping this doesn't last too much longer.
Sounds like Prodromal labor or "false labor." Its basically the bodies way of "warming up" for the birth. THey are similar to Braxton Hicks in that they are the bodies way of practicing. But they are actual real contractions. Think of it this way. If your body continues with prodromal labor there is a very good chance that you may have a quick and maybe easy labor since your body will hopefully be all ready to go when real labor starts. Hang in there!

That's encouraging! Thank you!

nurrieum · July 2012

kali55:
nurrieum:
KateLouise:
DD2 totally messed with me, by giving steady painful contractions and then just stopping. I was a STM, and still didn't really know what was happening.
Try and get heaps of rest, and nourish and hydrate yourself.
Can't wait to read your birth story and see how the "grossness" works out for you.
FWIW to my mind birth isn't "pretty" but it's friggin amazing, and none of the gross stuff matters. At the same time I remember that before I gave birth the idea that I might poo in front of people was not made better by the thought that I wouldn't care. WTF?? I'll be pooing in front of people, and not caring?? What on earth can be happening that I'm not caring?
Answer: Something painful, exhausting, beautiful, overwhelming and just friggin amazing.
Good luck :-)
Thank you for the encouragement and kind words!
Yeah I started to have some really painful pulling contrax today- but they stopped so I didn't get my hopes up! lol Basically just waiting until my water breaks lol (praying to God that it does!) My DH has been wonderful about letting me get tons of rest and being incredibly helpful with SS.
I'm a little interested myself to see how I will feel at the end. I saw a photo once of a woman pulling her child out screaming "I love you" at the top of her lungs and I was like "that's not going to be me. I'll do something ridiculous." My mom was saying how beautiful the photo was, I was just like "AUGH! that looks awfully unpleasant." My DH has already been there with my SS though it was not a natural birth (induce/epi) so at least he's prepared for a vaginal delivery. That helps- I think he's most worried about being helpless to do anything when I'm in pain. We both have a dry odd sense of humor though, so I'm wondering how that will come out. My MW has told us some funny stories of angry women during transition. Everyone thinks it's funny that I'm a huge advocate for natural and home births and seeing my reaction to things upon getting pregnant as the realization slowly dawns on me- "Oh dear Gawd- and I'm doing it that way!" I have received a lot of encouragement and am really committed to having a natural birth despite my adverseness to the ickyness!
I had a natural at home birth and I ended up pushing for nearly 3 hours (my MW explained that they will only let you push for a maximum of three hours and then you get cut) and I was so tired and I yelled at one point "get this little f-er out of me". Not exactly a beautiful moment. Lol. But when they put him on my chest... Wow... It was worth all that labour and more. Im not a religious person but it really does feel like god is in the room.
Best of luck and you can totally do this. You were built for this! I had a similar situation with DH, as he has two daughters, both were epi births. He found he was A LOT more involved, because I needed him to be with me through each contraction. He was physically worn out when DS was born.

I expect a moment like this! lol

My SS's BM had a very easy labor and was apparently pretty nonchalant about the whole thing. Dh is looking forward to how this birth will be different and how he will be more a part of it.

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