Pregnant after 35

Ladies, we lost him!!! (long)

Oh ladies, i cant believe i am writing this and i apologise and am deeply sorry for upsetting anyone but i know your wondering whats going on!!!! 

We lost our precious Sean James on saturday, i did my usuall and checked heartbeat in morn after waking, he is usually pretty quiet at night so dont remember anything different, wasnt happy thought slow so checked again and heard lovely beat and checked 3 more times and was finally happy, went downstairs and had breakfast, he usually goes mad kicking and moving when i eat but i didnt feel anything, i went up immediately and checked heart and i could hear nothing, called doc, checked and nothing, drove to hospital which is an hour away, did scan etc and we found no heartbeat!!!  It all happened within half hour from hearing heartbeat and then nothing, i had even felt him kick before going to have breakfast......oh ladies it is so awful.....i was given a tablet on the saturday and was taken into hospital on monday, induced with gel at 7am, again at 1pm, not long after waters broke, went 8hrs and then had epi, got some sleep for abit and then gave birth to our precious son at 430am, 8lbs11oz and 54cm long!!

We buried our beautiful angel yesterday beside his little cousin Carla, my DHs brothers first child, she died 2days after being born 14yrs ago.  We are so devastated, to have gotten to 40wks4days.....oh he was/is so beautiful, peaceful and angelic!!  I apologise if im not making some sense in this post, we are here and just drifting in and out of emotions, i dont know what more i can say, again im so sorry for upsetting you, i hope im doing the right thing by posting!!

Take care ladies ((((((hugs)))))))

 

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Re: Ladies, we lost him!!! (long)

  • I am so incredibly sorry for your loss.  I can't imagine the heartache you must be feeling.  I wish you peace and I send you an endless supply of hugs.  
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  • oh honey, I cant stop crying for you.  I am sitting here just bawling.  I am so sorry your sean was taken from you.  I know there are no words that can make you feel better but I wish I had them.  Know that my thoughts and prayers are coming to you and your family and I believe in my heart that my daughter in heaven is watching over your little boy.  Remeber to take pictures of you and him because even if you only had him for 9 months he was still your son and youwill want those memories and I bet he was/is so very very beautiful.  and if you feel like sharing anything or need someone to talk to you can give me a private message or I can send you my phone number. Lots of love and hugs to you and your husband and your son.
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  • I'm so sorry for your loss :(

    T&P to you & your husband. 

  • I am so very, very sorry on the loss of your precious son.  I wish I had some words of comfort to offer at this time.   I'm so sorry.   

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  • I have no words other than I am so so sorry. I am praying for you.
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  • I know I don't post on here much, but my heart breaks for you and your family.  I can't even imagine your heartache.  I am praying that God's healing hands embrace you during this difficult time. Huge healing hugs to you and your family....
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  • You're absolutely doing the right thing by posting. I can tell you my sister found a lot of comfort with Compassionate Friends. She spent a lot often there after my nephew passed. You are in my thoughts and prayers, and if you're interested, PM me, I'll see if I can get more info from my sister. 

     I don't know if you're the religious type, but I am. If you are, know that God didn't do this. It's not part of his plan. It didn't happen for a reason. But, he knows better than anyone what it's like to lose a child, and he'll help you through it.  

    Hugs. Know you're never alone, and we're all thinking of you.

  • I am so very very sorry and cannot even imagine the pain and sorrow you must be feeling. Words can't come close but I truly wish you and your family the best. 

    Hugs.  

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  • Oh I feel just awful now having posted and begging for an update. I am so, so sorry... like Jess I cannot stop crying because it is unimaginable to me that this has happened to your family. I am so sorry! So many thoughts, prayers, and virtual hugs going out to you.
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  • So, so, so sorry for your loss. You did the right thing to let others know who can carry you in their prayers.

    As another poster said, when you are ready, there are many loss support groups & infant-loss support groups to share with others who have survived such a thing.

    Again, so sorry - (((hugs))) 

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  • I am so sorry for you and your husband. I can not imagine the pain you must be feeling. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. My sincerest and deepest sympathy.
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  • OMG, I am so utterly speechless, and so sorry for your loss.

  • steverstever member
    I saw this earlier and couldn't bring myself to post a response. There are no words. I am so terribly, terribly sorry and hurt for you. Please take care of yourself.
  • Oh Karen, I am so sorry!  I know that there are no words that can take away the pain you are feeling, but please know that you and your DH are in my thoughts and prayers.  Please take care of yourself and each other and know that we are all here for you.

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  • I am so incredibly saddened by your loss. You and Sean are in my thoughts. 
  • I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. I am at a loss for words and incredibly saddened by what has happened to your family.

    IVF #1 ET 1 d3 embryo 10/30/11 BFP
    3 Embryos frozen (1 d5, 2 d6)

    DS born 07/29/12

    FET #1 ET 1 d5 embryo 02/10/15 BFN

    FET #2 1 d6 embryo didn't survive thaw, transferred last d6. CP :(

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  • I am so sorry for your loss. Try to stay strong,will includ you in our prayers! :-(



  • How terribly heart wrenching. There are just not words for such horrible news. I wish you peace in this awful time.
    BabyFetus Ticker
    BFP May 2017. 
    BFP July 2014. Low Progesterone. DS born by repeat c-section for breech presentation.
    BFP November 2011 TWINS!!!. Lost a twin at 7 weeks. DS born VBAC.
    BFP July 2009. DD born via c/section for breech presentation.
    BFP Jan. 2009. Missed miscarriage at 9 weeks.D&C March 2010
    December 2009 - Diagnosed with bicornuate uterus.
  • Oh Karen, I have no words.  Just please know that I am thinking of you and keeping you and your husband in my prayers.  I am more than heartbroken for you.

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  • I can't even think of anything to say right now and am typing through my tears.  I'm so deeply sorry for your loss.  May God bless you and your sweet angel. 


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  • Oh, I am so so so sorry to hear this.  Sending the biggest (HUGS) to you.  I don't have the words.  T&P to you and your family.  I am heartbroken for you.
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  • I have no words, except that I am sorry and will be thinking of you and your DH.  I hope that you will keep in contact, so that we know you are doing ok considering your terrible loss.  (((hugs)))
    TTC since 10/09 Me-43 DH-44 RE and testing 10/10-11/10, Recommending IVF 1/11 New RE AMA and DOR-DH low motility IVF #1.1 cancelled 3/11 due to poor response IVF #1.2 May 2011, one perfect 8-cell embryo, 3dt-BFN, IVF #2.1 Converted to IUI d/t poor response. New RE 9/2011. IVF 2.2 completed using HGH,EPP,DHEA, Q-10 and accupuncture. Transferred one 8-cell, grade one embryo on 10/19. BFP 10/31/11 Chemical pregancy on 11/2/11. Started stims for IVF #3, our final try, on 12-2-11. ET on 12/18. Transferred 3 Grade A embryos-BFFN Planning DE IVF, late March/early April- Donors ER expected to be 4/2-4/4. PAIF/SAIF welcome
  • Oh Karen.  I cannot even say that I am sorry because it doesn't seem enough.  My heart is aching and weeping for you and your husband on this terrible loss.  I cannot imagine the pain and sorrow you are going through after losing your precious Sean.  You, your husband and Sean are in our prayers.  If there is absolutely anything that I can do for you, please please let me know.  It must have been terrible for you to have to post this, but thank you for letting us know as we have all be thinking of you and Sean.  I am sending millions of hugs your way.
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  • emikatemikat member
    My heart is truly breaking for you right now.  I can't imagine the pain of such a loss.  I'm so very, very sorry.  
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    TTC 10/11. IUI 2/12. BFP 3/8/12. 4/26/12 missed mc. RE consult 5/17/12. IVF #1 ER 7/13/12 53R, 41M ICSIed, 32F, 8 5d, 6 6d blasts - all PGD/frozen. PGD results 1 normal M and 1 normal F, 1 maybe M. FET 9/6, transferred 1 F embie. Beta 9/15 BFN. FET#2 planned for 11/2012 put off until 2013. Surprise BFP 11/21/12!! My son was born on 7/24/13!

    FET 4/28/2015 - Transferred 1 M embie. 5/6/15 BFP!

  • I am so sorry for your loss. I wish there were something more to say.
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  • So, so sorry.  sending up some prayers for you tonight for peace and strength!
  • Oh Karen I am so sorry to read this. I can not even imagine what you are going through right now. I don't even know what to say that will give you comfort because nothing will right now. Life is so f*cking unfair sometimes. i am so sad for and just want to give you a hug. I am so so sorry.
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  • I'm sooo sorry.  Hugs to your family.
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  • Oh Karen, I cannot believe this has happened to you. My heart breaks for you and your DH that Sean was ripped away from you. I have no answers for why bad things happen to good people. I am beyond heartbroken for you and wish you great strength to endure this crushing loss. I wish I could do or say something to ease your pain but sadly I know nothing will help. Just know that women around the world are thinking and praying for you. Take good care of yourself. I am so incredibly sorry.

    TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
    DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
    5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
    OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
    DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
    DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
    CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
    DE IVF #3 1/14  ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d

    DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
    First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!

    K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days

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  • I am beyond heartbroken to learn this. Karen, I am so incredibly sorry for this terrible, terrible loss; I am awed that you even had the strength to post. Know that we are all thinking of you and grieving with you.
    me - 41 (dx: DOR); DH - 53 (no problems); 7/18/09 - married!; 8/4/09 - BFP on first (real)try; 9/14/09 - missed m/c; 9/15/09 - d&c; 11/09 - 3/10 - 4 natural cycles = BFN; 4/10 - dx hyperthyroidism caused by Graves' disease; 6/10 - thyroidectomy; 7/10 - 12/10 - 1 natural and 5 medicated IUI cycles = BFN; 1/11 - new RE; dx low ovarian reserve (AMH .42; 1/26/11 -- BFP (ectopic) from IUI #6; methotrexate 2/10/11; 6/2/11 - IVF #1 = BFN; 9/12/11 - prescreening for DE; 9/15/11 - IUI #7 (unmedicated)= BFN; 11/8 - begin DE cycle (shared risk program); 12/5 - ER (5 eggs/4 mature/3 fertilized/2 left by day 5) 12/10 - ET of one 1BB blast (expanded, "fair" quality), none to freeze; 12/22 - totally shocked by +hpt; beta #1 = 413; #2 = 3952 2/14 - CVS reveals a healthy baby girl! EDD: 8/27/12 DD born 8/31/12, 10 lbs 10 oz and perfect in every way. 
  • I am so sorry for your loss.  I can't even begin to imagine what you are going through. I'll keep you in my prayers. 
    TTC since Feb 2012. Me: 39, DH: 37
    BFP #1 5/27/12- m/c 7/9/12 @ 10w2d (cytotec induced @11w).
    Fibroids, Hashimoto's Hypothyroidism
    BFP #2 11/18/12  EDD 7/27/13
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  • I have no words other than I am truly, terribly sorry for your loss. Many prayers coming your way. 
    Lucky Mom to 5 girls: 09/97, 06/99, 10/02, 11/04, 04/08 & Peanut #6 due in April! Pregnancy Ticker Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • Oh Karen I am at a loss to find any words that could even begin to offer you comfort. As I have journeyed with so many of you ladies through this time in our lives, I feel like friendships have been made on these Bump boards, even though we are far apart. I wish I was in Ireland and could hug you close!!  Know that a friend in California is wishing you and your DH strength and much love through this most difficult time in your life.  Prayers are being said for your beautiful butterfly Sean James.

    With sympathy,

    JM 


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  • I can't imagine what you are going through.  I am so, so sorry for your loss.
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  • Karen I'm just so sorry and heart broke for you and your family. 
    Mom to Hope 2004 Blessed with #2 due to arrive 11/02/12
  • I am so incredibly sorry.  My heart is breaking for you and your family.  I am praying for you and your family.  
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  • I am so very sorry for your loss. Words escape me. Your family is in my thoughts, prayers and heart.
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  • I am so sorry, my heart just breaks for you and your husband. My thoughts and prayers are with you both.
  • I can't imagine the pain you are going through.  T & Ps to you and your family at this time!

    Me: 41, DH 43 TTC #1 since 8/09 CP 10/09.
    3/11 Clomid-Ovidrel-IUI #1-progesterone= BFN.
    5/11 Femara-Bravelle-Ovidrel-IUI#2-progesterone=BFN.
    6/11 Femara-Ovidrel-IUI#3-progesterone=BFP!
    Beta #1 7/1: 39. Beta #2 7/5: 301 U/S 7/19 - saw HB!!
    EDD 3/12/12
    DD born 3/5/12
    Baby #2 Beta #1 12/16: 439.  Beta #2 12/18: 1240
    EDD 8/22/15


  • Oh, Karen, I am so incredibly sorry for your loss.
    TTC #1 since June 2010
    Me: 36, DH: 42
    Dx: DOR and MFI

    DH: low count + very low motility; hormones all normal; Sperm DNA Frag. test = poor to fair; male karyotyping normal
    Me: FSH 13.4 + AMH 0.26 + hypothyroidism; Scratch the hypothyrodism (?); Blood clotting and immune panel all negative; endometrial biopsy normal

    IVF #1 (MDLF - Jul/Aug 2011): BFN (9R, 5M, 3F with ICSI, 3dt of 1 10-cell grade 2, no frosties)
    IVF #2 (EP-antagonist - Sep/Oct 2011): BFN (6R, 4M, 3F w/ ICSI, 3dt of 1 6-cell, 1 7-cell, grade 4s, no frosties)
    DE IVF #1 (shared cycle - June 2012): c/p (6R, 6F w/ICSI, 3dt 1 8-cell grade A- and 1 7-cell grade A-; no frosties)
    DE IVF #2 (shared cycle with new donor - Nov/Dec/ 2012): - BFP!!!!! 12/14/12. U/S on 12/27 shows twins!!!!!

    SAIFW/PAIFW
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