I am currently living in a different state with my son while he is undergoing cancer treatment. So, although my husband visits as often as he can, it's just me and my 14 month old in our temporary household.
My son has never been a good sleeper. He currently wakes 4 to 6 times a night and, each time, cannot go back to sleep without being rocked - sometimes for an hour. I am exhausted (and in my first trimester). One night at 2 am I couldn't take it anymore and just left him in his crib to cry himself to sleep. Except that he didn't. After 3 hours, he was still crying and standing up. Previous attempts at crying it out have gone the same way.
Aspergers runs in my extended family, and in my immediate family. I am starting to wonder if my son might have something that is making it difficult for him to self soothe. I have read the FAQs and the other behaviors he has that I have noticed are:
-shakes his head no frequently while playing, walking
-doesn't necessarily fixate on one part of a toy, but doesn't play with them as they are intended. For example, we have a ball drop toy and he will play with the balls, but never roll them down the ramp. he will never imitate the things I do with his toys.
- when he hears an airplane, he stops everything to try and locate it. The other kids around him don't even hear the airplane
-shrieks when he sees familiar things that he likes, like a picture on the wall or a certain flowerpot.
-he only has one word and mostly communicates by shrieking. He doesn't point at things, but will look if I point at something. He does make eye contact, but doesn't always answer to his name.
I can't make an appointment for an evaluation until we return home in a few months. What are your thoughts: is it possible there is some developmental issue impeding his ability to self soothe? Or, is my lack of sleep making me dream up issues? Dealing with cancer is hard enough; I'm afraid to think that there may be more rocky times ahead.
Re: Is sleep deprivation making me see things that aren't there?
Yes, to answer your question sleep deprivation could be making you see things. However, your son is young and under going cancer treatment. His communication will most likely improve once you guys are out of the traetment cycle. My youngest sister had numerous health issues (2 transplants, strokes, 100 blood transfusions before age 2). Her developement was slowed down by being in the hospital all the time. She didn't have the energy to just be a kid.
Yes, your son could have ASD, or AS but I wouldn't make a diagnosis your priority right now. Just focus on getting through the treatments. Nothing seems like a huge red flag.
I have never been in your shoes but wanted to say growing up with my sisters medical issues I know how stressful it can be. Take some time to just enjoy your DS. My mom developed severe anxiety and still sees things in my sister no-one else does. It's part of being mom to a child with an illness. Nothing will change that.
You sound like a brave strong woman. Follow your gut. Good luck.
Thanks for putting things in perspective. The continuous lack of sleep is really making things difficult for me. On the really bad nights I am at a complete loss of knowing what to do to get him to sleep. Even though he has rough nights, he is always wide eyed, smiling, and ready to go at 100 mph each morning. It is cute, but I am a zombie for the first half of the day and can barely keep up with him. I don't know where he gets the energy.
You are right, he has spent so much time in the hospital and keeping away from others that he rarely ever gets to be around other kids.
I really could use a break! But I'm just going to keep on trucking through the next few months. It is a constant worry in my head and, Id like to get him help as soon as possible if he needs it. I have noticed, from reading this board, that an appointment with a developmental pediatrician takes months to get. Perhaps I should call now in hopes that he will be seen shortly after we return. Thank you again, Auntie. I tried to embed my responses in the text body above. I hope it worked!