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Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss
Intro
Hi everyone-
Recently suffered my second m/c. We lost our first son at 18w 2d due to incompetent cervix and this pregnancy at 11w 5d. Sadly with this pregnancy even with all of our planning it has been rife with problems. We have no children yet
My questions to everyone here: What are some good ways to deal with the worry you will never have a successful pregnancy? Any recommendations for when the guilt hits and you blame yourself? Has anyone suffered nightmares after a m/c and how did you handle them?
Thank you all!
Missing my two little angels.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Intro
I'm so sorry for your losses. I don't think there is any easy way to deal with the pain, or the fear, or the blame (even though it's something that is completely out of your control). Just keep talking about it with supportive people--this board has some wonderful women on here. You are not alone.
(((hugs)))
** BFP #1 - M/C at 6 weeks 4/13/2012 **
** BFP #2 - expecting a little leprechaun!! EDD 3/21/13 | HB 7/30/2012 (6w3d) **
NT Scan 9/4 - looked great! | Grow, baby, grow!!! | A/S 10/29
***All AL always welcome***
I'm very very sorry for your losses.
As to your first question, I would urge you to see a specialist, Either an RE or an MFM. You should have a full RPL panel done to rule out anything else beyond IC. I don't know how to deal with the worry, I'm there myself, but I will say seeking further medical reasons helps ease y mind a bit.
In regards to the nightmares, you may want to consider seeking out therapy, either individual or group. Sometimes talking it out, bringing your fears to your consciousness helps relieve your sub-conscious. There are so many emotions to work through after loss, it is not something anyone should have to go through alone. And of course, we are hear to listen as well. Just venting to other women who understand what I'm going through helps me tremendously.
BFP#1 10/1/2011. Our perfect little girl, Her heart stopped @ 12w1d. D&E 11/23/11
BFP#2 3/13/12 Weird CP/Possible EP @ 6w0d
BFP#3 5/28/12 CP @ 5w0d
BFP/WTF#4 10/26/12 CP
BFP#5 12/10/12 EDD 8/23/2013
I am so sorry for both of your losses. I think we all want to know what we can do next time to ensure that it never happens again. I wish there was a way to actually do that. I know that I plan to talk to my doctor to see if she will monitor me more closely next time- like every week or every other. I know that won't change anything, but it might help me deal with my crazy anxiety that I will now experience as soon as I get that bfp.
Edit:
I just realized this is not what you asked. After my first m/c I was convinced I would never get pg. I ended up going to a acupuncturist who became like a therapist to me as well. I don't know that I can say the acupuncture worked, but it did help me to talk to her every week and at least let me feel like I was doing something pro-active.
Thank you all for your kind words and thoughts-
After my last loss DH and I had a pregnancy loss group we could attend, since that loss though we have moved out of the country and are working to find a similar group.
As to this m/c I see my high-risk OB tomorrow (It was supposed to be my dating and cerclage planning appt). My midwives and my OB want me to come to the appt so they can see what they may be able to figure out.
I am also Rh negative and we don't have DH's type, but I have had two Rhograms in the last year. Because of the bleeding I had it could have been a factor.