Breastfeeding

"Happy to starve"?

This is something my ped said when DS was 1 week old. He said some babies won't cry when they are hungry and will just be calm and passive but secretely starving. This has played with my head ever since. It seems like hogwash to me. I can't imagine any living creature just happily starving... and eating is such a urgent drive for babies. Has anyone ever actually seen a case if this?

Re: "Happy to starve"?

  • I have not heard this phrase, but my LO is really laid back and does not cry when she is hungry.  She might fuss a little, but you can distract her so easily that she would go hours without eating.  I fed her at home every 2 hours just to make sure she was good.  At DC, they feed her every 3 hours to the minute, and I KNOW she's not crying/fussing on such a regimented schedule.  I was at my parents' house this past weekend and with so much going on, I definitely didn't keep LO on the every-2-hours thing, and she was FINE.  So yeah...I believe it.
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  • And to add....when my LO was born, she was so sleepy, and didn't eat, and they were doing tests so she was in and out of the nursery....I didn't BF her for at least 8 hours after her birth, maybe 10?  It was a long time.  We had visitors (hello, DH's entire family!) and before I knew it, all that time had passed....and she was still sleeping. 
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  • I am so worried that my DD is doing this!  She has cried on occasion for food, but goes so long in between meals- and then only eats small amounts (1-2 oz).  It makes me wonder if she doesn't have a signal to her brain to alert her to hunger.  (But, on the flipside, if I try to make her eat when she isn't hungry, or after those few oz, she will flat out refuse, so I am guessing she may just get full more quickly?).  Not sure.  It is SO scary though.  I wonder how they diagnose this, and what treatments they do for such a LO?
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  • Good points! I hadn't thought of it like that. Do you think this applies to older babies who have learned breast=food=not hungry as well or just newborns?
  • jcsumm0jcsumm0 member

    I think "starve" is a bit strong, but my DD was one who was always pretty content and never an "on demand" BF'er.  She was slow to gain weight, even when she was 4 months old, and I found I really needed to offer to BF her every 2 hours rather than wait for hungry cues. 

    I think it is important to remember that "don't offer, don't refuse" is weaning advice.  It is great to BF babies on demand, but it also never hurts to offer whenever you feel like it. 

  • My baby is a very content little guy, who does not really cry for much of anything. I agree that having a laid back baby can be a bit of a guessing game.  I just decided that I would offer at least every 2 to 3 hours in the beginning.  I was super careful that he always had an adequate diaper count.  As he has gotten older, I will let him sleep a little longer during the day, but if he's awake I offer like clockwork even if he's not giving much in terms of hunger cues.  Most of the time, he is happy to nurse when I offer.  When he's not interested, he will suck a few times and then turn away.  I am still counting diapers as well.  His weight gain has been completely fine.  He was born 5 weeks early at 5 lbs 12 onces, and I think he's around 13-14 lbs now.    I don't really think there's anything wrong with his ability to feel hunger, or anything pathological that requires treatment.  I think this is a matter of temperment, and that he just needs me to take the lead on things a little bit.   When he goes to daycare, I will tell them to feed him every 3 hours, unless he's giving hunger cues.  I don't expect to have a problem.  I think they might think I'm a little obsessed with diaper output, though! 

    There's a section about laid back babies in The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding

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  • One of the hospitals in my town offers a breastfeeding clinic and you can take your baby to be weighed. Do you have something like that in your area? Or maybe a way to weigh her? Because as long as her growth seems on track I don't know that it is anything to really worry about. I would wake LO every 2 hours before 2 weeks old, but then my pedi said to do "on demand." Now he definitely demands so I could see it being difficult if he didn't. I would probably aim to feed every 3-4 hours during the day if she doesn't fuss and then let her STTN if she can. Maybe you can also ask your pedi the longest it would be ok for her to not eat? I'm just basing this off how often DS eats. Sometimes he can go 4 hours at night, at most, but he's younger.
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  • imageAmyG*:

    Well it actually makes logical sense to me.

    In the womb they had automatic nutrition before they even knew they needed something, they got it.  they just slept their lives away without having to work to eat or drink.

     

    some babies seem to have a delayed hunger instinct, so they'll lay there all happy and comfy looking, or sleep so much and not realize that they have to wake up and do something to get food.  Like they'll just wait for it to be delivered automatically thru the umbilical cord.

    If you realize that their stomach is the size of a marble when they are born, they may not actually feel hunger until they eat something, it digests and then they feel the emptiness.  some don't seem to know that means you have to actively nurse to take care of the emptiness.

    also the longer they go without eating, the longer they can go without eating, because after a bit you don't have the hunger pains anymore.  if you combine that with jaundice, which makes them sleepy, and if they don't get enough fluids, they get more jaundiced, so then they get more and more sleepy and just can't wake up enough to actually eat or know they are hungry.

     

    That is why it's recommended to feed a newborn frequently, about every 2 hours until they regain their birthweight, even if you have to nag them to get them awake.

     

     This is all very well said, but the bold part is SO true.  DD2 was born early (35w) and I had to wake her up every 1.5-2hrs to force her to eat.  She would have slept until she shriveled up into nothing had I not woken her up.  She had jaundice issues that lasted longer than most due to being preterm.  One of the hardest parts of BFing her was making her wake up.  Even if I got her awake long enough to latch, a few sucks into it and she was back asleep.  I had to constantly do things to keep her awake so she'd keep eating.  So yes, they definitely will sleep instead of eat and then get dehydrated very, very quickly.  


    • DD1: August 2009
    • DD2: December 2010
    • DS: August 2012
    • M/C 9/2013, 12/2013 
    • DD3: October 2014 - April 2015 Miss you baby girl.
    • Current Due date:  April 14, 2016
    Musings of a Farmer's Wife
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