Sorry guys!! (and thanks bs for letting me know about the page the other day.. I missed it!) I'm up pumping,,,, you'll all get to enjoy these 3:30 am feeds too ;-) Evan is doing great. He's been putting on weight and is up to 3 lbs 8 oz as of yesterday. We've started letting him explore breast feeding and he seems to know what to do but doesn't have the strength to do it yet. It's only a matter of time though. They are thinking of trying to let him regulate his own temp today or tomorrow and if so he'll be out of the isolette! Im doing well, yesterday was tough not having him home for fathers day. Every day is a little easier because I know it's one day closer to him coming home. But it's still hard. Physically I feel "normal" and like I was never pregnant. Which is a weird feeling. Ill try to keep you all posted more often but if I miss a message and someone can let me know that's great. It's hard to read all the posts about pregnancy when I keep thinking "that should be me" ... Im so happy for you all and wish the best for you all but I still struggle with feeling ripped off a lot. I barely got to feel him kick before it all ended. I never got my big pregnancy belly. I will never see his foot come through my belly or feel his hiccups. Dh doesn't think he wants anymore kids because he's horrified I'll be hospitalized again and we will end up in nicu again so I may never get to experience those things. So im sort of mourning the loss of my pregnancy if that makes sense. Don't get me wrong. Holding my son makes it all worth it but I struggle. So if I'm not around a lot that's why. It's also tough to see people complain about being pregnant when I wish I could still be. Sorry if this was a bit of a downer :-( we really are both doing awesome and I will keep you updated and try to post on my good days because I think of you all frequently!!!
Our little hippo was as impatient as mom!
Hoping for a full 40 weeks!!
Re: Update
You are not being a downer!! Do what is best for you and let yourself feel everything you are feeling. My friends who have had preemies describe feeling pretty much the same way you are... don't worry about not posting here (even though we miss you!) When Evan is older and home and things start to feel "normal" again, we will still be here for you when you are ready! Take care, and thanks for taking the time to update
So happy Evan is doing well.
I can't imagine what you are going through emotionally, you sound very strong. So glad that your son is doing so well and I hope you continue to do well also.
You are not being a downer and I can see how coming here would be difficult, I hope everything gets better each day. Congratulations on you son again!
Aww Philly! You aren't being a downer. You're actually helping put things into perspective. I know a lot of women, myself included at times, just want to meet and hold our little ones so badly that we want to rush the beautiful moments like feeling the kicks and hiccups.You help us realize that maybe those little kicks and hiccups are exactly what makes pregnancy so wonderful in the first place...especially when they are taken away from you so quickly.
Know that all of us are thinking of you daily and wishing you the best!!
Mom of 2 monkeys and 1 on the way!
Christian12/06, Liam 08/12, Monkey #3 10/10
Thank you for being so honest, PG. I am so sorry you are having to go through this. You voice your sorrows and disapointments well, and I'm so sorry it's hard to come here and read about pregnancy when you don't have that any more.
But I am SO glad Evan is thriving and even getting to bf now! Kudos to pumping, that is such hard work. I hope he gets to go home with you very, very soon.
Take care.
You're the best Philly! Thank you for the amazing update and I am so, so, so, so glad you and Evan are hanging in there like the champs you are!!!
You are not a downer, and we're here for you!!! Big hugs as always!!!
Make a pregnancy ticker
PG, you are certainly not a downer, and I'm so happy to read your update! IMO your feelings are 100% justified and normal considering all you, your DH, and Baby Evan have had to go through these past few weeks
(((HUGS))) and I'll be continuing to pray for you all as you get through the upcoming weeks before bringing your sweet boy home!!!
Hang in there hun
~Sweet Girl *8/18/08* c-section ~ Sweet Boy *12/2/10* VBAC ~ Sweet Boy *8/14/12* VBAC~
VBAC Birth Story 2VBAC Birth Story
I'd never read this and think you are being a downer, what you are saying completely makes sense.
I'm so glad to hear baby Evan is growing stronger, that's great!!! We are all thinking of you and hoping for the best for both you and Evan.
DS #1 Born: 10/03/06, DS #2 Born: 08/06/12 My Cooking Blog
it wasn't a downer at all. i, as usual, love reading your updates. i am always so touched by the honesty and true emotions you share. i really appreciate it.
i'm so grateful that you and evan continue to grow stronger. grateful and relieved.
i'm sure there are SO MANY mixed emotions right now, but i am confident that, with time, all that will remain are the good ones.
love to you and your family!
FET #1 Dec 2013 BFN
FET # 2 Feb 2014 BFN
No more frosties
IVF #2. September 2014
PGD yielded 2 perfect 5d blasts
SET November 9, 2014
Nov 23, 2014. Another BFN
Not sure where to go from here.
Thanks everyone. I just called and they informed me that he gained another ounce last night and is in clothes now!!! (they keep them out of clothes until a certain weight/ jaundice is not a concern as much) so that's a huge step. They are testing his body temp regulation now so he may be in an open air crib in the next few days. My little rock star is making mommy so proud!!
(and I have been posting on preemies too so if I go Mia you can always find me there!!)
AWESOME NEWS!!!!! he is a warrior, for sure!
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