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2nd Trimester
numberonemama
member
I don't think DH likes me pregnant!
numberonemama
member
He hasn't tried to have sex with me in weeks. We have had sex a total of two times in 7 weeks or so and I initiated it both times. I have initiated it on several other times too and nothing. A couple of weeks was my fault since I didn't initiate b/c of his facial hair.
He wouldn't have sex with me last pregnancy and then until I lost the weight (three years later) I could count on one hand how many times we had sex. And it wasn't for the lack of my trying. I could have sex daily, a couple of times then also. He even told me when I started losing the weight a couple of years ago (when all of a sudden he wanted to have sex with me again) that "I was starting to look like my old self".
I have not gotten over this. Probably b/c he looks more pregnant than I do. I get not wanting to have sex with a big belly but come on...he can't have it both ways and it really hurts my feelings!! I think it sucks that he only finds me attractive when my stomach is flat and that he's allowed to look like ***. He's also been really short with me and is pretty much an ass to me. He barely will say good bye to me when he leaves for work let alone kiss me good bye like normal. I've tried talking to him and he just gets pissed off and says something rude or leaves.
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Re: I don't think DH likes me pregnant!
I can't relate to my DH being rude to me about it, but I have noticed that we NEVER have sex anymore... and now when we do, I initiate it or I have made a comment earlier that day about how we don't ever do it.
However, I have been having an internal dilemma about whether it has anything to do with the pregnancy (he always says that's not the case and makes a special effort before we leave for work to tell me that I look cute/beautiful/pretty, etc). The same week we found out that I was pregnant, he found out he got a second job he had been trying forever to get. So now he works two full time jobs, and literally has no day off. So he always says he's tired. I believe him, but it is still so difficult sometimes when my body is changing the way it is, to believe it has nothing to do with me.
Good luck and I feel ya.
After reading some of your previous posts, your husband sounds like a douche. First, he throws a fit about about having to make a few stops for you on a long trip, and now this? Wow.
Yes, I'm completely aware my DH is a douche these days. He wasn't like this when we met, when we got married, ect. He even was acting normal up until a few months ago and it's like a switch was flipped. Not sure what's going on.
Were you two trying to have a second? Could he be anxious about the extra obligations?
This one was not planned...big "oops" moment! Though I was the one flipping out when I found out and am still freaking out. DH was really great and excited...Maybe he's changed his mind.
In his defense, when he first started acting like a douche we were having our first kid, then the economy crashed and we have suffered like everyone else, and he lost his dad. Maybe it's the whole stress thing. I don't agree with the way he's treated me and don't excuse it, but it's most certainly not who he was or even necessarily who he is to the rest of the world. I guess I need to go back to the marriage counselor and see what's up.
Good idea.
Yes, this. Why do you want to be with someone who treats you this way? I would imagine this isn't the only area of your life in which he treats you like crap. I once dated someone who told me that he was very attracted to me, but that if I ever gained more than about 10 pounds, he would still love me, but he would not be attracted to me.
I dumped him very soon after.
No, you both should go back. I'm sure that's what you meant, but just in case it wasn't...
And if he started acting like a douche during your first pregnancy before all the stressful events, then no, it's not stress, he's just being a douche. Either way around, he needs to grow the *** up; if he can't do it on his own, there's nothing wrong with seeking professional help to make it happen. Good luck!
This.
this is my favorite response ever.
Sorry you married a douchebag?