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August 2012 Moms
Reilly626
member
Which is better- daycare, in home nanny or babysitter's home?
Reilly626
member
There's pros and cons to all, but Im curious what others think. I like the daycare idea because its regulated and most you can watch your child online from your desk thanks to cameras. What I dont like is the assembly line feel and the fact that your kids get sicker quite a bit. A nanny again you would really need to trust as a babysitter who could possibly plop your child in front of a tv all day or have harmful people over. Its all so hard as its not you, the mother. What are your thoughts?
*Im okay the first year as I am taking a year maternity leave, and the next year I will use my parents, but they are in their 60's so I am thinking I will need to put them somewhere part of the week to give my parents a break. As a teacher, parents in town offer to babysit but they want $100 a day for 2 for 8-3:30. NJ prices are crazy- its $25-30 an hour for a sitter anyway for 2. Full daycare for the month is $1800-2000 for 2.
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Re: Which is better- daycare, in home nanny or babysitter's home?
I did daycare with DS when I went back to work after I had him. I didn't like how sick he was all the time. I did like the teachers, but I didn't like that the kids were always sick and there was not one time I'd walk in without a kid with snot running on his/her face. Disgusting. I mentioned it a few times, it never was resolved. I interviewed some in home daycares. I ended up taking him out of daycare and sending him there. I didn't like it. I don't know why...I couldn't pin point it. Maybe because she was the only one and there was no guarantee that DS would be attended to if he was crying and another kid was crying at the same time...I think it was all in my head. I then sent him to an old friend's house this past winter. She watched him during the day and my mom would pick him up after she got off of work. I liked it because he was older and she had a daughter around his age so they played well together. She had a newborn baby, but I didn't doubt her ability to take care of DS, her daughter and her newborn.
It's totally up to you. Minus the fact that the kids were always sick, I preferred the daycare better. If I would have kept him there, I would have pushed for their faces to be wiped WAY more often. Plus, it's more expensive.
I have worked all three of these jobs.
Nanny: I was a nanny for twins for five years and I think that is the best option if you can afford it. Although since you're having twins it may be less for a nanny than a center or home daycare. The cons are that you have to be really careful about who you hire. I would suggest a college student with great references. Older nannies often have nanny friends and they sometimes neglect their charges at the park if their friends are there. When I was a nanny the kids and I often ran errands and stuff together. I would prep veggies for dinner, make marinades, laundry while kids napped. That would be great for you with two little ones.
Home daycare: For babies, a home daycare is my second choice. This is good because they usually operate with a license so the people working have to have some child development classes. Also they are usually CPR certified. My family I worked for paid to get me certified when I was a nanny though so it isn't hard to have a certified nanny. Home daycares are more likely to abide by your schedule than a center and are often less $$. Mostly it depends on the facility. There are great ones and not so great. Also home daycares are more flexible if you want to work four days a week. If you go this route, just use your instincts.
Center: While there are good centers, the baby to staff ratio is often higher. Also the schedule is less flexible. I think this is best for kids 2 and up. Again there are great centers out there though. It depends on what is near you. Usually people who work in centers have to have degrees in a child development or education field. That is encouraging. Most of the big name places like Bright Horizons treat their employees horribly. This isn't good because the last thing you want is a daycare teacher taking it out on LOs. If you tour a place be sure the staff is not talking to each other about their weekend. Like to see how happy the kid seem.... but a crying baby doesn't necessarily mean a bad center. The way the staff handles a crying baby can be very telling.
I was a nanny for three years and after a year with my first nanny baby, the parents put her in daycare (it was cheaper than a nanny). That was when she started getting sick constantly. Every time I saw her, she had a snotty nose, a cough, and runny eyes.
Then I nannied for two little boys, from different families, in a nanny share (the parents split the cost of me). One of the boys was with me Mon-Fri, the other boy was with me Mon-Thurs, and then would go to his grandma's in home daycare on Fridays. That boy was always sick as well, and would bring back so many germs and get the other boy sick.
I know kids get sick but if I had a choice, I would have a in home nanny, and if I couldn't afford to pay for one on my own, I would find a family to share a nanny with. In addition to the one on one care, you don't have to pack a baby up in the morning and rush to drop them off at daycare, you don't have to mess with baby's morning routine if you wake up late or if baby had a bad night because the nanny is coming to you. Also, your nanny SHOULD do all baby related cleaning-baby laundry, baby dishes, clean baby toys, wash baby sheets, do grocery shopping for baby (if store is nearby), make food, etc.
I also have been all 3. I would never send my children to a center unless I had zero other options. Even the most $$$ centers in my area are crap, they cover stuff up all the time. Ratio for an infant here is 4 to 1, well I had 4 in my room and was always alone since I could be. It sucked. Babies had to wait, babies cried. Parents got to watch (not hear) their crying babies on camera, even higher ups could but no one would come to help. I had walkers and tiny babies since the rooms were set for that age range. That was pretty hard too, a baby always had to be "in" something so they didn't get trampled by a 1 yr old. Oi, and the illnesses.....yuck!
My 5 yrs as a nanny were great, would be my first choice if I had to do it.
I now do in home care, but am exempt for license as I don't care for more than 2 additional kids. I lucked out with a great family and will watch her new baby along with her toddler once my new baby comes! Her and I are 1 week apart, and my son is 3. It will be hectic but doable and will help pay the bills without putting our kids in day care. Her kids are in a home environment, low germ level, and much more personalized care. Sure, it's 4 kids total but the age ranges help....the older two like to help and can do more on their own.
This sounds like a lot of the reasons we picked a home daycare. I will only be going back work for 3 days and most centers in our area will only do full time. Also the provider is someone we have known for a while and trust, also being as we live in a small town it was the best option for location also. I am very excited about it! I think you just have to choose whats right for you and the babies.
I'm a fan of the center environment. It's super structured and I love that they follow a curriculum. I could be biased, but I also think that DS is much more socially advanced than my friends kids who aren't in daycare (when it comes to things like sharing, interacting with other children and adults, etc). And as you mentioned, it's a highly regulated environment, which gives me peace of mind.
I certainly think you can find great in-home options, but I think they require more background research and are harder to find.
Proud Mama to cleft cutie
We have a nanny for DD1 and will be keeping her when DD2 arrives this August. I love our nanny. We did to a background check and pay for her to be CPR and First Aid certified. I interviewed about 12 nannies before selecting ours.
She does so much around the house to help our family, from laundry, dishes, cleaning and grocery shopping. She has even taken DD to doctor for checkups when I could not get off work.
I love that when I leave in the morning I can leave DD sleeping and do not have to drag her out in the cold Chicago winters.
Mom of 2 monkeys and 1 on the way!
Christian12/06, Liam 08/12, Monkey #3 10/10
We were similar to you in that we were able to keep DS home the first year.
After that he went to an in-home daycare in our neighborhood. It's just a few houses away and we walk him too and from every day. I prefered it to a daycare center when he was still an infant because he got more personal attention and it was more on-demand care. There is not a lot of learning there, but it's a very loving environment.
This fall he will turn 2 and will start preschool.
I think something like this would probably work best for you if you are looking for something to give your parents a break from babysitting just that 2nd year. You are probably not going to find a daycare center that you can get part time care. But starting then they are 2 you'll have preschool and MDO options that are part time if you prefer that.
It really depends on what is available in your area and budget, and what your parenting style is. We've been in two centers we were incredibly happy with. I thought in-home was more my style, but we didn't see anything we would have sent our child to, even those that were highly recommended.
We are doing a licensed in-home daycare, but we already knew the provider before signing up. I'd probably be a little less comfortable with that setting if I had to interview providers that I didn't know. Some of the benefits (aside from those already mentioned) are that I don't pay for sick days or days that I don't send him. I'm a teacher so this works out well for me. I'd have to pay for all of those days if I used a center.
ETA - I am in NJ as well and I will be paying $400/month for part-time care. If I do full-time care it is $600/month.