Saying No

klibby707 · May 2012

Is there a point to saying that at my son's age? (he is 13 months)

Typically, I just say it if he hits me or goes somewhere he shouldn't. He generally then goes away or stops. Sometimes, he will cry, and then, I just feel like a mean, bad mom. =(

RunningGal900 · May 2012

I don't say no, but I don't allow hm to do whatever he wants. I try to save no for maor things (like when he tries to eat choking hazard size rocks in the backyard). He responds better with being told what to do (please hand the food to mommy instead of throwing it) vs what not to do(don't throw the food). When we trained our dog I remember them saying don't use no because it eventually just becomes a meaningless word to them. I realize that we are raising people, not training dogs, but still the same principle seems to make sense.

klibby707 · May 2012

Thanks. I definitely appreciate the advice!

itsmevkb · May 2012

The response about saying no in different ways got me to thinking about the last episode of Modern Family.

Anyway, I say "no" sometimes to my 10 month old. They actually do start to understand what you are saying and yes, sometimes kids will cry when you're telling them they can't do exactly what they want when they want, but that is part of being a parent. You're not being a mean mom, you're being responsible one.

Nicki Boston · May 2012

my DD is 13 months and I absolutely say no, and I know she knows what it means.. I also do the "ah ah ah" sound which is usually more effective.

saying no doesn't mean youre mean...

bugandbibs · May 2012

We almost never say "no", but that's because we are trying to avoid her learning the word to say back to us. (It worked with DD1).

Usually we say things like, "We don't hit. Be gentle with (name)". Sometimes, I physically move her while telling her what not to do/what she should be doing instead. "We don't climb the bookcase, let's read a book together on my lap." While I move her to another area.

I don't think saying no means you are a mean, bad mom, but I don't think it is very helpful sometimes. I think sometimes kids aren't sure what they should be doing and that can lead to a lot of "no" behaviors.

MissLadyTay · May 2012

Um, yes, I say no often. Like when he hits me or someone else. Or throws food. Or tries to grab my hot coffee mug. And then he cries. And I ignore his tantrums. And he learns limits and is a happier baby.

Jeremy'sMom · May 2012

DS is 13 months also and I tell him no. 99 times out of 100 he just laughs at me and does it again. Like when I tell him not to his his big brother. He is quite a handful already, lol.

azzyberry · May 2012

DD understands what no means but when I say it she'll just start shaking her head from side to side and giggle.

At this age I don't think there is any point of saying no to get her to stop doing something. I just redirect her to something else.

virginiagirl11 · May 2012

Usually we say "No no" in a nice voice and then redirect him. It usually works. He definitely knows what's off-limits and sometimes identifies those items as "nonos" (outlets, which we have covered, the transmitter for his monitor, etc.). Sometimes he pushes his luck and specifically messes with the items, in which case we say no no more sternly. If he doesn't stop, we pick him up and relocate him and kindly direct his attention toward something else. It works pretty well. If he does throw a fit, I say, "I'm sorry, sweetie, but the outlet is dangerous and it can hurt you. We don't play with it. Let's read a book. Can you pick out a book for us to read?"

The one or two times he's been in a truly possibly dangerous situation, a sharp "No!" immediately stopped him in his tracks because he wasn't used to that tone of voice.

At this age, I think they definitely get it.

Saying No

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