Special Needs

Feeling discouraged

DS has been showing some great progress with therapy and through the autism center he goes to two mornings a week. But along with that progress I feel like we are embarking on some new challenges with behavioral issues, along with DS deciding he likes to take his diaper off during quiet time and bed time. I cleaned up a pretty disgusting mess today, and just about broke down crying because I feel like there is always something and I feel like more things start to "fall apart" before something starts to feel like its "coming together". Maybe its just this season we are in, but man its getting tough. 
 
I don't know what to do about the diaper issue. He's nonverbal ASD, and DH brought up the idea of starting potty training. Talk about overwhelming and adding more to my plate, especially with having an 8week old at home. Geez.
 
Life just feels really hard and my plate just keeps filling up faster than I can process whats going on. 
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Re: Feeling discouraged

  • I'm sorry.  Is your son showing signs of readiness for the toilet training?  If not, I would move it to the back burner for now.  I know loads of NT boys who were not PTed at 2.8.  Most were 3-3.5, a few were 4.  With a newborn and other challenges on your plate right now, unless he's really self-motivated, I wouldn't bother.

    Re the diaper issue, can you put him in a onesie?  Or even fasten the diaper on backward with the tabs at the back?   

  • I second the zippered sleeper on backwards. We had to do this at about 4 am...after cleaning up a big mess as well! It is so frustrating & it sounds as if you've got a ton on your plate already. Unless he's really ready to PT, I wouldn't add that to your list at this point. Good luck & hopefully it works!
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  • ((hugs))

    I'm so sorry you're going through this.

    DS1 began potty training early on--but then we had issue after issue and then he finally wasn't potty trained until after the age of 3 (we finally pretty much forced it around 3yrs2months when he was being held back at daycare--we didn't want to see this happen when he had just gotten used to his room and friends)

    For us, we definitely had to stop when DS2 was born--it was just too much.  We did what we could but he just wasn't ready---we did the pull ups and that helped a little.  Finally at the above mentioned age we just went to undies and truthfully--the first week or two it was a mess--but he finally "got" it.....and although he still had a lot of 'accidents' for a while--months later he became mostly accident free. 

    I say maybe try a pull up???

  • Sorry to hear this.  DS1 didn't potty train until he was a little over 4.  He had no interest before that point, despite school trying their hardest.  Once he was ready, we got it down (including nights) over the course of a weekend.  It was frustrating to have him in diapers that long, but not forcing it was the right decision for us.  Potty training turned out to be rather easy.
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  • My ds is one who likes to remove the diaper and is close but not quite ready for PT. Originally he just liked to put his hands in his diaper, he quit doing that before he turned 3 and now he takes his diaper off as soon as it gets wet (and then hands it to me if I'm available). We used to just put a onesie on under his clothes and that worked until he was about 2.5 and outgrew reasonably priced onesies then during the day we just started dressed him in overalls to help keep the diaper on. At night we used to put him in fleece zip up pjs and he would leave the diaper alone, then once it got warm out we had to move to two piece cotton pjs. After a few days a cleaning up pee and then a day of cleaning poo off of his carpet we stopped gating him in his room at night and now he comes and wakes us up as soon as he wakes instead of taking off his diaper.
  • I am sorry.  It's so very hard.  I know.

    Also, give yourself a break!  Looks like you probably still have some intensified emotions going on given you have a new little one as well.

    Some days it's literally hour to hour.  And that is all I think about.  This hour.  

    Thinking of you! 

  • We had a poo all over the room night 2 nights ago, I feel your pain.

    My DS is no where near being ready to use the potty and I just can't bring myself to add it to my plate right now so it's on hold until he shows more signs. 9 out of 10 times the footie jamies will work to keep him contained. 

    Good luck. I feel you 100%. 

    Diabetic, 2IF, PCOS; blessed beyond words to be called "mommy" to Drew (6/30/09) and Alynn (5/16/11).
    Parenting author for Women of Worth. Mom Blogger and photographer.

     Andrew David: mixed receptive/expressive language phonological disorder, sensory processing disorder, Disruptive Behavior disorder-nos and insomnia.


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  • gwennecgwennec member
    My daughter unzipped her footed pjs and took off her diaper last week before her nap. When she woke up, I walked into her crying and saying I peed. Yes, all over her sheets and self, thankfully it was only pee! I have the best tip though, we now put the footed pjs on inside out. It has worked WONDERS! She can no longer access the zipper and everything stays put!
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