WTF DH?!?! (Clearly a vent - feel free to share!)

[Deleted User] · May 2012

I get that he's tired. P's been sick (and not sleeping well) with probably HFM. I'm tired too. However, he's being a real jerk about it. This morning I apparently whispered with the slightest wrong inflection, so he got huffy. Huh? I'm trying to be nice despite being bone tired. This morning his "apology" was beyond lame.

Gah! All I want really is for him to say anout HALF of what runs through his head. Is that asking too much? lol. I am going to be soooooo happy for Pen to feel better, DH to get a nap or 5, and peace to resume in the monkey house.

Anyone have a DH (or other) vent?

LibberDuck · May 2012

Your post reminds me of my DH! I SAH and he works, so I'm always getting the "I'm too tired to help out and you don't know what it's like" crap. I don't buy it! I love my LO but staying home is no walk in the park, either! Ugh.

My vent has to do with our landlord and partly with DH. The house we are renting was put up for sale with a realtor in November. In the beginning of February, our landlord called and told us they took it off the market and we could rent it as long as we needed to. Well, the realtor never took down his sign nor took it off his website. Last week we receive a call from our landlord saying that someone was interested in buying it and when would be a good time for them to come look at it? My DH and I were a little stunned since she had told us it was off the market, but since the realtors sign was still up, we figured okay, whatever. We set up a time for Tuesday when DH was off of work and called our landlord Monday night to confirm. Landlord told us "oh, she can't make it tomorrow, so how about Wednesday instead?". We say fine. Tuesday night the realtor comes to take his sign down. DH asks him if we will see him the next day and he had no idea what DH was talking about! Apparently the house was off the market, but our landlord didn't submit the paperwork until last week. It then dawned on us that since the realtor wasn't showing the house and our landlord lives two hours away, it was up to us to show the house to the potential buyer. Anyway, we get the house all clean and ready for Wednesday and the woman never shows up! We tell our landlord and she says "oh yeah, she had a doctors appointment and couldn't make it". Ugh! We then reschedule for last night at 6 and she the lady didn't show up until 7:15. When we asked our landlord if she was coming she said "oh, shes just running a bit late". She also brought some random neighbor kids in with her (we didn't realize until after she left) and her parents showed up and I had to show them the house too.

So in short, all these random people walked through my house and looked in our closets and our landlord was shady and expected us to do what she was paying the realtor to do before she fired him. It was really frustrating, especially considering our landlord never told us when the time and day changed AND she had told us months ago that our house wasn't for sale anymore!

Sorry to take over your post, sofa, I just had to get that off my chest! And the reason I'm mad at DH is because he was such a big baby over the whole thing. He was so annoyed with our landlord that when the woman first arrived, he barely said anything and left me to play realtor and give them a tour of the house. And now he wants to move out asap, regardless of whether or not the house sells. Of course, it falls on me to look for a new place since I SAH. Living in a town of 2500 with nothing but desert surrounding us, our options are quite limited!

Again, sorry for hijacking the post, I'm just so frustrated!

Edited for formatting issues... my Kindle made it into one giant paragraph!

Cheekers2010 · May 2012

LibberDuck:
Your post reminds me of my DH! I SAH and he works, so I'm always getting the "I'm too tired to help out and you don't know what it's like" crap. I don't buy it! I love my LO but staying home is no walk in the park, either! Ugh.
My vent has to do with our landlord and partly with DH. The house we are renting was put up for sale with a realtor in November. In the beginning of February, our landlord called and told us they took it off the market and we could rent it as long as we needed to. Well, the realtor never took down his sign nor took it off his website. Last week we receive a call from our landlord saying that someone was interested in buying it and when would be a good time for them to come look at it? My DH and I were a little stunned since she had told us it was off the market, but since the realtors sign was still up, we figured okay, whatever. We set up a time for Tuesday when DH was off of work and called our landlord Monday night to confirm. Landlord told us "oh, she can't make it tomorrow, so how about Wednesday instead?". We say fine. Tuesday night the realtor comes to take his sign down. DH asks him if we will see him the next day and he had no idea what DH was talking about! Apparently the house was off the market, but our landlord didn't submit the paperwork until last week. It then dawned on us that since the realtor wasn't showing the house and our landlord lives two hours away, it was up to us to show the house to the potential buyer. Anyway, we get the house all clean and ready for Wednesday and the woman never shows up! We tell our landlord and she says "oh yeah, she had a doctors appointment and couldn't make it". Ugh! We then reschedule for last night at 6 and she the lady didn't show up until 7:15. When we asked our landlord if she was coming she said "oh, shes just running a bit late". She also brought some random neighbor kids in with her (we didn't realize until after she left) and her parents showed up and I had to show them the house too.
So in short, all these random people walked through my house and looked in our closets and our landlord was shady and expected us to do what she was paying the realtor to do before she fired him. It was really frustrating, especially considering our landlord never told us when the time and day changed AND she had told us months ago that our house wasn't for sale anymore!
Sorry to take over your post, sofa, I just had to get that off my chest! And the reason I'm mad at DH is because he was such a big baby over the whole thing. He was so annoyed with our landlord that when the woman first arrived, he barely said anything and left me to play realtor and give them a tour of the house. And now he wants to move out asap, regardless of whether or not the house sells. Of course, it falls on me to look for a new place since I SAH. Living in a town of 2500 with nothing but desert surrounding us, our options are quite limited!
Again, sorry for hijacking the post, I'm just so frustrated!
Edited for formatting issues... my Kindle made it into one giant paragraph!

Eeek, Libber! You're a better person then I am. I don't know that I would have agreed to show the house.

[Deleted User] · May 2012

Libber - OMG! I wouldn't have been very nice about it. And no worries - I asked for hijacking!

EVM1216 · May 2012

LibberDuck, I hope you made sure to show them all the leaky facets, chipping paint, etc. during the tour.

Here's my DH vent. DH is graduating tomorrow, finally, yay! So he's been in a really good mood all week. I, on the other hand, have had some really stressful news this last week at work. (Apparently 3 out of 5 of the students I supervise have complained about me being "snippy" this semester.) Anyway, my boss has given me the task this year of "improving my communication with Millennials." My self esteem took a real nose dive over this because in the past I've always had really good relationships with my workers. Plus I hired a new student, which was not the candidate that my boss wanted me to select, and she made some veiled comments that led me to believe that if I can't get this student to work out then my boss was going to start believing that these complaints are more my fault than my students being whiners.

Anyway, so I try to express the to DH, and he completely dismisses it. Tells me that I should be happy and relieved like he is, that I'm not really upset over what I'm upset about- I'm really upset about this other thing, and then relates my problem to some anecdote from his life that in no way relates to my situation. I went to bed wanting to smack him for being an idiot.

bosha711 · May 2012

Libber! No way - do not agree to show your place again! If someone shows up at your door, you need to say, sorry, you need to make an appt with your landlord & turn them away - or better yet - do not be home when they are scheduled to arrive!

What does your lease say about showing the apt? When we lived in a 2-family house, our lease said that the landlord needed to give us 24 hour notice before they showed the apt to someone. And we definitely made sure we were not home for it. Our landlords lived in the other part of the house, so obviously they were able to open up our place & show it. But no way was it our responsibility to show it!

MH vent is that he is responsible for doing dishes & he left a sink full of stuff last night. This morning I asked why he didn't do them last night & he said he was tired, so he went to sleep. Well, maybe if he stopped playing video games a whole 5 minutes before he went to bed, he would have been able to do them! Grrr. Then of course this morning, he's says he's too busy getting ready for work to do them. Then it leaves me to do them b/c I hate having a pile of dishes (or any other mess) when the babysitter comes over b/c I am anal like that.

LibberDuck · May 2012

EVM1216:
LibberDuck, I hope you made sure to show them all the leaky facets, chipping paint, etc. during the tour.
Here's my DH vent. DH is graduating tomorrow, finally, yay! So he's been in a really good mood all week. I, on the other hand, have had some really stressful news this last week at work. (Apparently 3 out of 5 of the students I supervise have complained about me being "snippy" this semester.) Anyway, my boss has given me the task this year of "improving my communication with Millennials." My self esteem took a real nose dive over this because in the past I've always had really good relationships with my workers. Plus I hired a new student, which was not the candidate that my boss wanted me to select, and she made some veiled comments that led me to believe that if I can't get this student to work out then my boss was going to start believing that these complaints are more my fault than my students being whiners.
Anyway, so I try to express the to DH, and he completely dismisses it. Tells me that I should be happy and relieved like he is, that I'm not really upset over what I'm upset about- I'm really upset about this other thing, and then relates my problem to some anecdote from his life that in no way relates to my situation. I went to bed wanting to smack him for being an idiot.

I tried my best to be honest about the house (including that we have an exterminator spray every month because DH saw a scorpion in our bathroom) but at the same time, I kind-of want her to buy it so that we won't look like the jerks when we decide to move out!

And EVM, I'm pretty sure I go to bed most nights wanting to smack my DH! I'm sorry about your work situation. Maybe you can talk to your students and find out why they feel that way? I know sometimes my old coworkers took my joking around as being snarky, when it really wasn't what I intended.

LibberDuck · May 2012

bosha711:
Libber! No way - do not agree to show your place again! If someone shows up at your door, you need to say, sorry, you need to make an appt with your landlord & turn them away - or better yet - do not be home when they are scheduled to arrive!
What does your lease say about showing the apt? When we lived in a 2-family house, our lease said that the landlord needed to give us 24 hour notice before they showed the apt to someone. And we definitely made sure we were not home for it. Our landlords lived in the other part of the house, so obviously they were able to open up our place & show it. But no way was it our responsibility to show it!
MH vent is that he is responsible for doing dishes & he left a sink full of stuff last night. This morning I asked why he didn't do them last night & he said he was tired, so he went to sleep. Well, maybe if he stopped playing video games a whole 5 minutes before he went to bed, he would have been able to do them! Grrr. Then of course this morning, he's says he's too busy getting ready for work to do them. Then it leaves me to do them b/c I hate having a pile of dishes (or any other mess) when the babysitter comes over b/c I am anal like that.

Our lease doesn't say anything about showing the house, since they wrote it up and we signed it AFTER they told us they took the house off the market. The tough part is, the lease is only month-to-month since DH will take a transfer as soon as one is available, so that also means the landlord can sell and tell us we have to move out in 30 days.

And no, it definitely won't happen again. First of all, I'm not comfortable with people seeing all the stuff we own, and second, I'm pretty sure we will be moving regardless if a nice place opens up. We have a phone call in to a woman who owns a duplex that has 3 bedrooms and a fenced in yard (perfect!) but rumor has it, she doesn't want to rent to people who have pets or kids (which makes me wonder who else she will find to rent a 3 bedroom?). We will see what happens!

jarebearsmom · May 2012

Ugh men! I'm making Mother's Day gifts for our moms. I've already told DH what I was doing and asked him a month ago if he wanted me to make something for his mom or if he's just going to buy her something. He's YET to tell me and it's TWO days before Mother's Day! AND he knew that I was using an empty can of fruit to make my step moms gift and where did I find it this morning???? If you guessed the TRASH can then you would be correct! Ugh!

jarebearsmom · May 2012

Non DH related vent: this lady on FB added me to her shop and sell group. She posted size 4 jeans and I text her asking about them. She replies with "YOU'RE in a women's 4???" I told her yes that I had lost 30 lbs and wore 4s and 6s and needed new clothes and asked her to bring them to church Sunday because we were visiting her moms church. She said "ok as long as they don't sell before" and then removed them from the group. I have a feeling she's not going to bring them Sunday

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