Weird thing principal said at the parent orientation for Kindy.

bebemama · May 2012

"Hi, I'm Mr. Soandso. I'm the principal here at our school. I love my job. I want to make a deal with you guys. It's called the 50/50 rule. You believe half of what your kid comes home saying to you about school and we'll believe half of what your kid comes to school saying about home, the good half."

WTF is that.

I didn't like that, it struck me as super weird, especially at the very beginning of his opening speech. What do you think? I mean obviously he's trying to be funny, but still.

august06mom · May 2012

Yeah, that's awkward and immature. I'm sure he was trying to be funny, but it's not a great first impression!

shouldbworkin · May 2012

I wouldn't take it literally, but the gist is correct. If your DC comes home and tells you something concerning, the best thing to do is call and ask if your DC heard that correctly. They usually did not. Same goes for what they hear at school, especially in KG and early 1st. They come up with some doozies.

Sunflower7777 · May 2012

shouldbworkin:
I wouldn't take it literally, but the gist is correct. If your DC comes home and tells you something concerning, the best thing to do is call and ask if your DC heard that correctly. They usually did not. Same goes for what they hear at school, especially in KG and early 1st. They come up with some doozies.

This. Be glad they're giving you the 50/50 benefit of the doubt too. ; )

EastCoastBride · May 2012

shouldbworkin:
I wouldn't take it literally, but the gist is correct. If your DC comes home and tells you something concerning, the best thing to do is call and ask if your DC heard that correctly. They usually did not. Same goes for what they hear at school, especially in KG and early 1st. They come up with some doozies.

Yeah, this. Is it a weird thing to open with? Sure. But at the same time, I get what he's saying and he wants to try and be a team w/ the parents.

Kids make things up. It's a part of being a kid. And I'm sure the school has dealt w/ their share of parents freaking out over stuff that was later proven to be made up.

speckledfrog · May 2012

The director of the preschool I worked for says the same thing. I don't see how it is immature. Kids say weird things and if you take everything at face value you might wonder WTF is going on at school.

For example, we had a mother call the school in a huff because her 4 year old said the teacher had shown them pictures of naked people at school. It turns out they had been looking at x-rays.

We had a mother call once to inquire what the children had for snack that day because her child told her they had beer. Half right! It was root beer.

Once I dressed up as Mrs. Wishy-washy and wore a shower cap on my head. I had a little guy tell me his mom wears one of those when she showers with his dad.

I had a kiddo tell me that her dad threw jello at her mom in the middle of a fight.

We've had kids tell us that their mom is pregnant when she isn't or that her grandpa died when he didn't.

The 50/50 rule - don't take things at face value.

august06mom · May 2012

I'm not saying it's not accurate. But I think it's an odd thing to open up with.

Chapter79 · May 2012

I'd have to see his face, and tone.. all of that.. before saying it's weird. If he was really serious, and not being funny- yeah, strange. If he was cracking a joke, I'd probably laugh. As someone with a current grade K'er, it's SO TRUE. I laugh at some of the crap my daughter tells me now, and the stuff she says?! I joke her future job should be a storyteller. And it's definitely NOT all true. Because some things I've e-mailed the teacher over, and she writes back to explain what REALLY happened.

Maybe he was just trying to open the meeting with a funny to ease tension

gracendantho26 · May 2012

I think what he said is spot on. And I've learned you have to take everything with a grain of salt and a sense of humor with elementary school. There are some serious shenanigans that go on from kindy on (I just posted about how "fun" third grade girls are). :oP

4Speedy · May 2012

I think that's actually a pretty common expression among those who work with young children. I wouldn't read too much into it.

My DD kindy teacher made the exact same comment to me. DD goes to catholic school and was telling me about her Christmas pageant. DD played the role of Mary and she was explaining to me how she was goIng to have to stand up on stage and sing "One is the loneliest number" in her costume.

I was chatting with the kindy teacher, who explained they were also doing a separate play about The Gingerbread Boy who escaped from the oven and ran away. The words to "one is the loneliest number..." had been changed to suit that play.

I laughed and explained that our family had been under the impression it was the mother of Christ who was going to sing about being lonely. I told her that was the strangest nativity scene I could have imagined. The teacher told me I should only believe half of what DD tells us at home. I told the teacher I was scared to hear about the half she was hearing at school. We laughed and moved on. Kids say funny things and it was a good reminder to take it all with a grain of salt.

Zenya · May 2012

I don't think that's weird or immature or anything. Why do you think that? I think it's funny and accurate.

bebemama · May 2012

I didn't think it was immature, I just didn't like that within the first 30 seconds of talking to us, he was basically saying don't believe what you here from your child about us here at school. I didn't like the message. Now, sure it may be true and I am sure I'll remember back on it and laugh when DS comes home telling me some crazy story BUT, I am new to this school and to full day kindy, and to sending my kid on a bus, and to sitting in a cafeteria that my son will be sitting in next year eating his lunch as opposed to sitting in the seat at home across from me as he has for the last 5 years. SO with that said, I would of liked at that moment to felt 100% trusting of the principle of the school, and at that moment when he was saying don't believe what you hear from your child, I didn't, because I don't know him, at all. Perhaps at the end of his introductory speech a joke like that may have gone over better. Not the biggest of deals, by any stretch, but it just didn't sit well with me.

winomom22 · May 2012

I don't see anything weird or immature about it. DD's principal basically said the same thing and I thought it was cute/funny and spot on.

august06mom · May 2012

bebemama:
I didn't think it was immature, I just didn't like that within the first 30 seconds of talking to us, he was basically saying don't believe what you here from your child about us here at school. I didn't like the message. Now, sure it may be true and I am sure I'll remember back on it and laugh when DS comes home telling me some crazy story BUT, I am new to this school and to full day kindy, and to sending my kid on a bus, and to sitting in a cafeteria that my son will be sitting in next year eating his lunch as opposed to sitting in the seat at home across from me as he has for the last 5 years. SO with that said, I would of liked at that moment to felt 100% trusting of the principle of the school, and at that moment when he was saying don't believe what you hear from your child, I didn't, because I don't know him, at all. Perhaps at the end of his introductory speech a joke like that may have gone over better. Not the biggest of deals, by any stretch, but it just didn't sit well with me.

This. When I sent DS off to kindy, I didn't know a single person at the district. I was basically sending my little boy off blind into the care and trust of perfect strangers -- at least that's how I felt. Of course I knew it was time and everything would be fine, but I would have been extremely put off by this joke being the very first thing that he said.

May immature wasn't the right word, but I think it was unprofessional and stupid.

lollitots · May 2012

I've heard the same thing at our school, and I can guarantee you it is true. Kinders come home with interesting variations on things, and if you volunteer you will not believe the information about your family that they are giving out (Mom and Dad had a fight last night, my mom sleeps wearing only underwear, Mom needs a drink to go to sleep (this mom drinks a cup of tea everynight to relax, but that isn't how it sounds)). I have also seen parents get all up in arms about things that their kid said when their kid got the story wrong or made it up. The parents ended up very embarassed. I would take it as a good sign that they are giving you and your family the benefit of the doubt.

shouldbworkin · May 2012

He's not saying you can't believe everything your DC says when they come home from school. He's saying that sometimes what they tell you is only half true. It's not b/c they are lying. It's b/c they miss a lot of what is going on. It's the age and he's trying to save you from having an OMG WTF moment.

Xtine22 · May 2012

speckledfrog:
The director of the preschool I worked for says the same thing. I don't see how it is immature. Kids say weird things and if you take everything at face value you might wonder WTF is going on at school.
For example, we had a mother call the school in a huff because her 4 year old said the teacher had shown them pictures of naked people at school. It turns out they had been looking at x-rays.
We had a mother call once to inquire what the children had for snack that day because her child told her they had beer. Half right! It was root beer.
Once I dressed up as Mrs. Wishy-washy and wore a shower cap on my head. I had a little guy tell me his mom wears one of those when she showers with his dad.
I had a kiddo tell me that her dad threw jello at her mom in the middle of a fight.
We've had kids tell us that their mom is pregnant when she isn't or that her grandpa died when he didn't.
The 50/50 rule - don't take things at face value.

Did we work at the same school. I was going to say the same thing

littlemermaid · May 2012

LOL!!! I think that's hilarious!! I would of laughed out loud at that one. You'd be surprised what kids go to school and say what they've heard or seen at home. They of course have no filter and don't realize there are some things that should not be repeated. Also how they hear stories at school and come home but they get the story wrong or don't repeat it right.

AnnapolisLari · May 2012

Dear little baby Jesus in a manger, if this gets you so fired up and pearl-clutchy, you're going to have a looooong school career. The man made a joke. It flopped. Move the hell on.

Mrs Manners · May 2012

speckledfrog:

Once I dressed up as Mrs. Wishy-washy and wore a shower cap on my head. I had a little guy tell me his mom wears one of those when she showers with his dad.

This made me giggle snort. Dh and I often shower together (in a totally non-sexual way - its a big shower and we have multiple shower heads) in our glass shower adjacent to our tub where ds is taking a bath. Most of the time I wear a shower cap since this is usually my second shower of the day and I don't want to wash my hair again.

laurakaz13 · May 2012

august06mom:

bebemama:
I didn't think it was immature, I just didn't like that within the first 30 seconds of talking to us, he was basically saying don't believe what you here from your child about us here at school. I didn't like the message. Now, sure it may be true and I am sure I'll remember back on it and laugh when DS comes home telling me some crazy story BUT, I am new to this school and to full day kindy, and to sending my kid on a bus, and to sitting in a cafeteria that my son will be sitting in next year eating his lunch as opposed to sitting in the seat at home across from me as he has for the last 5 years. SO with that said, I would of liked at that moment to felt 100% trusting of the principle of the school, and at that moment when he was saying don't believe what you hear from your child, I didn't, because I don't know him, at all. Perhaps at the end of his introductory speech a joke like that may have gone over better. Not the biggest of deals, by any stretch, but it just didn't sit well with me.

This. When I sent DS off to kindy, I didn't know a single person at the district. I was basically sending my little boy off blind into the care and trust of perfect strangers -- at least that's how I felt. Of course I knew it was time and everything would be fine, but I would have been extremely put off by this joke being the very first thing that he said.

May immature wasn't the right word, but I think it was unprofessional and stupid.

MAYBE immature? No. Not at all. Parents are entitled and ridiculous these days and they love to blame the teachers, school and principal whenver their kid does something wrong.

What he said was spot on!

Andrewsgal · May 2012

laurakaz13:
august06mom:

bebemama:
I didn't think it was immature, I just didn't like that within the first 30 seconds of talking to us, he was basically saying don't believe what you here from your child about us here at school. I didn't like the message. Now, sure it may be true and I am sure I'll remember back on it and laugh when DS comes home telling me some crazy story BUT, I am new to this school and to full day kindy, and to sending my kid on a bus, and to sitting in a cafeteria that my son will be sitting in next year eating his lunch as opposed to sitting in the seat at home across from me as he has for the last 5 years. SO with that said, I would of liked at that moment to felt 100% trusting of the principle of the school, and at that moment when he was saying don't believe what you hear from your child, I didn't, because I don't know him, at all. Perhaps at the end of his introductory speech a joke like that may have gone over better. Not the biggest of deals, by any stretch, but it just didn't sit well with me.

This. When I sent DS off to kindy, I didn't know a single person at the district. I was basically sending my little boy off blind into the care and trust of perfect strangers -- at least that's how I felt. Of course I knew it was time and everything would be fine, but I would have been extremely put off by this joke being the very first thing that he said.

May immature wasn't the right word, but I think it was unprofessional and stupid.

MAYBE immature? No. Not at all. Parents are entitled and ridiculous these days and they love to blame the teachers, school and principal whenver their kid does something wrong.

What he said was spot on!

This! Parents like you are the reasons good teachers quit.

august06mom · May 2012

LOL! I was waiting for bitter Andrewsgal to chime in ... knew it wouldn't take long before she threw in that parents are the reasons good teachers quit. Ah I love this place.

Andrewsgal · May 2012

august06mom:
LOL! I was waiting for bitter Andrewsgal to chime in ... knew it wouldn't take long before she threw in that parents are the reasons good teachers quit. Ah I love this place.

So please enlighten me about why I am bitter? I loved teaching. I loved everything about it, but I do think parents are ridiculous these days and make teaching oh so much harder.

AnnapolisLari · May 2012

Are you kidding me?

Unless you grew up in the area or have older kids, of course you don't know anyone in the district. Everyone sending their kid to K for the first time is placing them in the care of strangers. That's what the freaking teachers are paid for. And background checked and fingerprinted and educated and tested... It's happened since the start of public education in this country and you and snowflayke are hardly special.

You need to learn that your kid is growing up and you are not going to know what happens every second of every single day. They WILL make *** up and tell it to you as gospel. You will make a lot of teacher enemies if you believe 100% of what your kid tells you.

bebemama · May 2012

AnnapolisLari:
Are you kidding me?

Unless you grew up in the area or have older kids, of course you don't know anyone in the district. Everyone sending their kid to K for the first time is placing them in the care of strangers. That's what the freaking teachers are paid for. And background checked and fingerprinted and educated and tested... It's happened since the start of public education in this country and you and snowflayke are hardly special.

You need to learn that your kid is growing up and you are not going to know what happens every second of every single day. They WILL make *** up and tell it to you as gospel. You will make a lot of teacher enemies if you believe 100% of what your kid tells

Relax, I am not even sure if this response is directed towards me or to someone else. I said I thought the statement was weird to bust out with within minutes. I realize my special snowflake is going to school and all that that will involve. Thanks. He goes to school now, in the district, everyday and we both LOVE it. I am completely prepared for what lies ahead.
I thought his statement was weird.
I am entitled to my opinion.
Where did I say I will believe 100% of what my kid tells me. I get half truths and half stories all the time already, I am prepared.
Are you seriously going through menopause or something because every.single time you respond to one of my posts it is completely assy.

REOM · May 2012

Not super weird at all. Rather cliche, really. I've heard this a dozen times in my career. Funny thing is, it's 100% true!

My advice to you? Don't go looking for things to be all "WTF" about. Work with your child's school and your child will have a much better experience.

AnnapolisLari · May 2012

Nope. I'm dandy, thanks. You just say a lot of stupid stuff and I can't help myself.

bebemama · May 2012

AnnapolisLari:
Nope. I'm dandy, thanks. You just say a lot of stupid stuff and I can't help myself.

Well clearly you are much wiser then me. Congrats. Good luck with the menopause.

AnnapolisLari · May 2012

You can fix hormones. You can't fix stupidity.

bebemama · May 2012

AnnapolisLari:
You can fix hormones. You can't fix stupidity.

Your mean and I am not, so I am not going to say anything else to you. I already felt a little bad about bringing up your old and crotchetiness, so I'm done.

LeoChic · May 2012

Wow. This thread got out of control. Clearly it's so slow around here that it seems like some are reaching for drama.

I totally get what you are trying to say. I don't see you saying that you will believe everything your kid says and many of these responses are putting words in your mouth.

I see you saying that the principal made an off-putting joke/statement that affected your first impression of him. I could see why you'd feel that way. I also get the sense that it's more than just what he said but also when he chose to say it and possibly how he said it (i.e. his mannerisms). It's not something I would let hinder my communication with him (and the school) initially but it's something I'd put in my memory bank in the event that there's issues down the road, especially issues that may center around the principal.

rebs · May 2012

REOM:

Not super weird at all. Rather cliche, really. I've heard this a dozen times in my career. Funny thing is, it's 100% true!

My advice to you? Don't go looking for things to be all "WTF" about. Work with your child's school and your child will have a much better experience.

All of this- especially the bolded part. Honestly I think the principal opened with that statment b/c he has to deal with sh*t from parents on a daily basis.

Andrewsgal · May 2012

bebemama:
AnnapolisLari:
You can fix hormones. You can't fix stupidity.
Your mean and I am not, so I am not going to say anything else to you. I already felt a little bad about bringing up your old and crotchetiness, so I'm done.

Omg this just made me laugh, did you really just call her mean. You sound like a kindergartener yourself.

BubblyToes · May 2012

Andrewsgal:
bebemama:
AnnapolisLari:
You can fix hormones. You can't fix stupidity.
Your mean and I am not, so I am not going to say anything else to you. I already felt a little bad about bringing up your old and crotchetiness, so I'm done.

Omg this just made me laugh, did you really just call her mean. You sound like a kindergartener yourself.

I love it.

And PS, it's "You're mean." And I know Lari can crochet, but her real skills are with her knittiness. Not her crotchetiness. YWIA.

AnnapolisLari · May 2012

BubblyToes:
Andrewsgal:
bebemama:

AnnapolisLari:
You can fix hormones. You can't fix stupidity.

Your mean and I am not, so I am not going to say anything else to you. I already felt a little bad about bringing up your old and crotchetiness, so I'm done.

Omg this just made me laugh, did you really just call her mean. You sound like a kindergartener yourself.

I love it.

And PS, it's "You're mean." And I know Lari can crochet, but her real skills are with her knittiness. Not her crotchetiness. YWIA.

The "your" just reinforces my point. That YOU'RE not too bright.

And I am far from the only one who thinks it. I am just the only one who said so. Maybe when you reach my advanced age you'll be grown up enough to sound like an adult and not a kindergartener. I don't hold out much hope.

I make perfectly reasonable responses to your occasional normal questions. See: the readiness post. Nothing assy about my answer. Had I said "it's when they implant the tracking device under his skin to make things easier for the school", now THAT would have been assy. Hmm

Temp108743750006959 · May 2012

justbeachy109:
Andrewsgal:
bebemama:
AnnapolisLari:
You can fix hormones. You can't fix stupidity.
Your mean and I am not, so I am not going to say anything else to you. I already felt a little bad about bringing up your old and crotchetiness, so I'm done.

Omg this just made me laugh, did you really just call her mean. You sound like a kindergartener yourself.
It made me think of the "I'm rubber, you're glue. Whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks onto you" thing we used to say in elementary school.

This Rubber ditty flashbacked me to childhood and made me want to travel to Florida just to smack my 45 year old sister.

CubbyMama · May 2012

I'm a teacher and my DD1 is in preschool, and I've heard that said a million times by colleagues and DD's teachers/preschool director. A kid says his daddy "picks up ladies in his car" for a living and the dad turns out to be a taxi driver...or a girl goes home and tells her parents that the teacher put germs on her hands when it was really glitter used to demonstrate hand-washing technique...or whatever. It's not a huge deal and doesn't mean they're planning to do bad things to your child and hoping you won't believe it when your child reports them.

But, I guess if those were the first words out of his mouth AND he was overall kind of weird, I could see maybe noticing that and being slightly put off.

EdithBouvierBeale · May 2012

I can't believe nobody else gets what she's saying here- ever since our kids were born we've been trying to tune in to their every need and decipher their codes and figure out what they need, want, and mean- and to hear the principal of their school say that he wants you to disregard half of what they have to say, it feels wrong, I think.

I don't think it's an impeachable error of judgement, but I DO think it's a sort of bristling thing to say to a bunch of nervous moms. Im super sad and antsy about sending Joo to school this fall, and depending on the day, I may have laughed at that remark, or been irritated by it.

I KNOW she's going to make up nonsense and Im going to have to be open minded to what is real and what is simply a 5 year old's impression- but I want to believe that I can believe what my kid says- and maybe Im weird, but I feel like that is just a preemptive way to show that if your kid starts having issues at school, the response you're going to get is " eh- your kid's making that up, things arent that bad..."

I get what she's saying. it was weird. not pull your kid out of the district weird, just weird.

bebemama · May 2012

Lari- Your an overgrown bully with a bowl cut, I don't care what you think of me. I'm not checking this post again because it is ridiculous.

The end.

AnnapolisLari · May 2012

Clearly something is hitting home, sweetie, or you wouldn't be so upset.

Nighty-night.

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