Why is it hard to remember labor?

wagneram13 · May 2012

Besides the 2 times I have given birth, I have never experienced a great amount of pain. Why is it hard to recall the details after the fact of labor & delivery? I keep asking my husband to tell me what happened and when. He tells me but wonders why I dont remember since I was there. I do remember bits and pieces but details are fuzzy especially during transition. Just curious what others think.

Bonidiebabe · May 2012

For me I think in part it was because I was in a hypnotic state. I've not done the research but from my understanding our bodies release hormones after birth that truly do help you to forget the pain of L&D. It makes sense that the body would do this in order to continue the cycle of procreation. It is a bummer though. I wanted to remember every little detail.

xnbride · May 2012

I think it is like any major event in our lives. We remember the feelings/emotions that the day/moment evokes but not necessarily all the specifics. Think about your wedding day; I imagine it is similar in your memory-fragmented with specific flashes of details and special moments.

edit to add: which is why birth photography is at an all time high right now. Just like a wedding, people want to capture the memories so they won't forget.

AnaKat405 · May 2012

Bonidiebabe:

For me I think in part it was because I was in a hypnotic state. I've not done the research but from my understanding our bodies release hormones after birth that truly do help you to forget the pain of L&D.

This is my understanding as well. While I'll be a FTM, there have been other events in my life of which the memory is fragmented for similar reasons.

honkytonk_kid · May 2012

So that everyone isn't an only child

I think many really difficult events in our lives get fuzzy with time.

Sawyerplus1 · May 2012

If we could remember it well, we'd have stopped procreating LONG ago!

When I was in labor with DS it was 30 hours long and I was very very tired and 'inside myself' by the last half. We went through a few nurse shifts while at the birth center, and I apparently couldn't remember one nurse who was with us her whole shift, and that was the day after birth! Now 4 years later, there's not much I remember....

3003girl · May 2012

I remembered it very well until about 3-4 months afterwards. I had a "normal" birth, but it was still very physically and emotionally traumatic. Time softened the memories, and now I can't even imagine how painful it was. I can remember other painful times more clearly, like when I got my wisdom teeth out and there were complications.

I do think it's the hormones. I also had no concept of time, even right afterwards. I had to ask my DH when things happened.

FyreFlyeRush · May 2012

AnaKat405:
Bonidiebabe:

For me I think in part it was because I was in a hypnotic state. I've not done the research but from my understanding our bodies release hormones after birth that truly do help you to forget the pain of L&D.

This is my understanding as well. While I'll be a FTM, there have been other events in my life of which the memory is fragmented for similar reasons.

Ditto. I forgot everything the second she was placed in my arms and nursed. I remember being in pain. But, it's fuzzy.

ridesbuttons · May 2012

People who survive things like shark attacks have a similar memory loss.

I think it is the brain's way of protecting you. Or perhaps the sensation of pain is too much for the brain to retain, like the file is too big for the space allocated for it.

Sawyerplus1 · May 2012

Interesting side note: apparently the people who get an epidural recall or remember the pain of childbirth (pre-epi) much more vividly than those who don't get an epi at all.

Has anyone experience an epi birth AND a med-free birth that agrees with that?

ridesbuttons · May 2012

Sawyerplus1:

Interesting side note: apparently the people who get an epidural recall or remember the pain of childbirth (pre-epi) much more vividly than those who don't get an epi at all.

Has anyone experience an epi birth AND a med-free birth that agrees with that?

I've done both and this was not my experience. I remember being so grateful/relieved from the pain after getting my epi but not the pain itself.

JKB1986 · May 2012

Sawyerplus1:
Interesting side note: apparently the people who get an epidural recall or remember the pain of childbirth (pre-epi) much more vividly than those who don't get an epi at all.
Has anyone experience an epi birth AND a med-free birth that agrees with that?

I can't say I agree either although I wasn't in that much pain when I got my epi. I planned to get it and they told me I could so I did.

Nechie122 · May 2012

I'm convinced being in transition altered my ability to think and feel. Not only are there gaps in my memory, but I know I was in an altered mental state. I can't really describe it, but it's almost like I lost my sense of inhibition. You know how everyone says that once you're in active labor all modesty goes out the window? That's certainly part of it.

annabelle.27 · May 2012

I fully agree with those who say it's so you go on to have another kid. After this last birth- which was more painful than my first- I was sure I'd never get pregnant again. Even thinking of doing it all again gave me this involuntary shudder. But then I began to forget the pain. Now, nearly three months later, I recall saying that it was by far the worst pain of my life but don't recall the pain itself. I casually mentioned having another baby to my husband and he stared at me like I was nuts and swore that he would NEVER put me through that again. lol.

Sawyerplus1 · May 2012

annabelle.27:
I fully agree with those who say it's so you go on to have another kid. After this last birth- which was more painful than my first- I was sure I'd never get pregnant again. Even thinking of doing it all again gave me this involuntary shudder. But then I began to forget the pain. Now, nearly three months later, I recall saying that it was by far the worst pain of my life but don't recall the pain itself. I casually mentioned having another baby to my husband and he stared at me like I was nuts and swore that he would NEVER put me through that again. lol.

Haha, this is me too! Labor #2 was much more painful than #1, and I remember saying as much, plus telling people that after that labor I'd never recommend going natural to anyone! I remember saying the words, but don't really remember the pain, and here I am, a month away from having another natural birth with #3!

wannabigfam · May 2012

I used the Bradley method w/ our child and honestly I remember almost everything...maybe because it was nearly pain free? I was in "the zone" and I think had I gotten out of the zone I would have experienced a tremendous amount of pain...but I felt so relaxed I remember even specific things I said during transition. The only thing that I can't specifically remember is what the "ring of fire" felt like - I know that it was burning when I was pushing for the few minutes I pushed. The part I do remember as hurting the most was AFTER the birth - I think because I wasn't prepared that I would have any cramping afterwards. I thought it all would magically feel better right away. This time I'm going to try and stay in my relaxed state so that I don't feel the cramping afterward.

Smurphette · May 2012

Sawyerplus1:
Interesting side note: apparently the people who get an epidural recall or remember the pain of childbirth (pre-epi) much more vividly than those who don't get an epi at all.
Has anyone experience an epi birth AND a med-free birth that agrees with that?

I don't agree either, I remember feeling pain pretty vividly all three times, with my second delivery, first natural birth, being the mildest. The difference for me has been in afterwards, as soon as my second and third sons were born I felt so much better. The cramping was there (which I actually don't remember from the second time but was intense after #3) but I could move around easily and my body felt so relaxed.

redheadinlove · May 2012

Bonidiebabe:
For me I think in part it was because I was in a hypnotic state. I've not done the research but from my understanding our bodies release hormones after birth that truly do help you to forget the pain of L&D. It makes sense that the body would do this in order to continue the cycle of procreation. It is a bummer though. I wanted to remember every little detail.

This. Although I gotta say, I feel lucky because I do remember most of my labor. Transition may be a bit fuzzy, but nothing unique happened. It was just contraction, screaming, sleeping, repeat.

choppinbroccoli22 · May 2012

My MIL had done some free-lance journalism, and she came to my bedside with pen and paper and took notes the next morning. We told her everything. She wrote it all down. I remember everything, now. I really think it helped to go over every detail with someone in a very journalistic fashion.

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