Trying to Get Pregnant

YOUR dad in delivery room

Do you plan on having your father in the delivery room?  My dad was in with my sister, I think it will just be me and my mom and MIL and maybe SIL. Idk. Do you guys have any plans as to who's allowed in the delivery room? 


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Re: YOUR dad in delivery room

  • No way. No way.in.hell. It would have only been me and DH.

    ETA: I have GREAT relationship with my dad, but just no way.

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  • Nope, no way. It was MH and I and the staff only during pushing. Family came inshortly afterward! I'm a more conservative person when it comes to things like that... if we're lucky to get pg with #2, we'll do the same thing

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  • My BFF had her dad in the delivery room.   She claims he couldn't have seen anything.  I know I haven't really experience childbirth, but I can't comprehend how he didn't see anything/

    I personally don't want my dad in there, and he doesn't want to be in there.

     

  • My husband has been the only one in the delivery room so far. I wouldn't be comfortable at all with my dad in there, but I would love to have my mom and/or sister. They live too far away and both work, so it will never happen. /sigh/ =(
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  • If we ever have biological children, no way Jose! 

    Ideally I'd like me, MH, and a doula.

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  • No.  I will have my husband....that's it.  I don't even want my mother there because I just don't like the idea. Personally I think it's private. Besides the staff, I don't need anyone except DH to share the moment with. 
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  • I wanted only DH. He insisted on having my mom there because he didn't think he could handle it alone. FIL and BIL came in the room very early on (20-21 hours before DS was actually born) just for a minute to say hello. I was fully clothed at that point. I would never have considered having anyone else, male or female in the room.
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  • Yea even above the waist is a little too close for me. My sister said she didn't care after she crapped on the table. All shame was gone. Ha


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  • tiffk10tiffk10 member

    It will just be me and DH.We have too many mothers/grandmothers to fairly allow anyone else to be in there.

    Also, my dad didn't bother to show up to my own birth so I highly doubt he would want to be there for a grandchild. 

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  • SkyBeeSkyBee member
    My dad was in the delivery room, but it wasn't planned. It was just going to be my mom and DH. Dad showed up just to visit right when I was in transition and I didn't want him to leave because he always makes me feel stronger and better so he stayed. I am really super glad he was there. He didn't get into the nitty gritty or anything, he was next to me sitting where he couldn't see anything. He was the only one that was paying attention to me between crowning and birth because everyone else was so excited about the baby and he just kept asking me how I was and telling me good job. It was a really special day and it wouldn't have been the same without him.
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  • ah625ah625 member

    My first time around it was me and my mom, with 15 hospital employees. Including a scrubby janitor with a large rolling trashcan. Don't ask my why he was there.

    I plan on having any future babies at a local birth center. So it'll be me, MH and two or three attendants 

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  • Nope. I would have let my mom in if it were a vaginal birth (besides H, I mean) but he was breech and we had to plan a c-sec where it's only you and one other (H, of course)...BUT...LO decided to arrive early which was NOT allowed because of the circumstances. So...Emergency C-Sec = I'm the only one in the room (and I was knocked out). Poor H thought that when they went to tell him "It's a boy etc etc" that they were coming to get him to go into surgery with me, instead they told him he could go the nursery to see his son. :'( Ollie was born to a room full of doctors and H didn't get to cut the cord and I didn't get to hold him until 5 hours later when I woke up.

     

  • Whenever it happens....heck no. I love my dad, but there's no reason for that one. It will be me and DH, and my sister for sure. Were iffy on the mom's just because the hospital we'd be at only allows 3 people including DH...and I DEF dont want his mom in there...it just might be more fair to not have either one of them. We will see when it happens. I have a while, I'm not even preggers yet. :)
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  • imageRadonOrchid:

    Nope. I would have let my mom in if it were a vaginal birth (besides H, I mean) but he was breech and we had to plan a c-sec where it's only you and one other (H, of course)...BUT...LO decided to arrive early which was NOT allowed because of the circumstances. So...Emergency C-Sec = I'm the only one in the room (and I was knocked out). Poor H thought that when they went to tell him "It's a boy etc etc" that they were coming to get him to go into surgery with me, instead they told him he could go the nursery to see his son. :'( Ollie was born to a room full of doctors and H didn't get to cut the cord and I didn't get to hold him until 5 hours later when I woke up.

     

     

    Sounds like DD's birth.  Why did you have to get knocked out? 

  • imagenyc7781:
    No.  I will have my husband....that's it.  I don't even want my mother there because I just don't like the idea. Personally I think it's private. Besides the staff, I don't need anyone except DH to share the moment with. 

    I'm w/you 100%. I know my mom is going to pull the 'but you're my daughter/I'm your mother' card and assume she gets to do whatever she wants. I know she'll try and make me feel bad about it but oh well. 

    I definitely do not want anyone in there besides H and the hospital staff when it's time to push. If I'm feeling ok beforehand then yes people can come in. 

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  • imageholly321:
    imageRadonOrchid:

    Nope. I would have let my mom in if it were a vaginal birth (besides H, I mean) but he was breech and we had to plan a c-sec where it's only you and one other (H, of course)...BUT...LO decided to arrive early which was NOT allowed because of the circumstances. So...Emergency C-Sec = I'm the only one in the room (and I was knocked out). Poor H thought that when they went to tell him "It's a boy etc etc" that they were coming to get him to go into surgery with me, instead they told him he could go the nursery to see his son. :'( Ollie was born to a room full of doctors and H didn't get to cut the cord and I didn't get to hold him until 5 hours later when I woke up.

     

     

    Sounds like DD's birth.  Why did you have to get knocked out? 

     

    They were going to give me an epidural but there was no time, the had to cut me open immediately because he was coming out. Like they had to push his little feet back in while simultaneously starting to cut me open. They had to put that mask on me and conk me out/put me under ASAP. He came fast. I'd only been in the hospital 30-45 min. I'm afraid with #2 I won't even make it to the hospital. (Fear)  

  • Under NO circumstances. Ever. Absofuckinglutely not. Ew.

    ETA: You do all realize that the delivery room involves a baby coming out of your VAGINA, right? As in your vagina. Vagina. 


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  • imageLollipopsAndCrisps:
    Under NO circumstances. Ever. Absofuckinglutely not. Ew.

     

    This. Me,DH, and my sis. 

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  • blush64blush64 member

    For my first baby my parents were both in the room during labour but left when it was time to push. I was pretty quiet through most of it but when it got close to pushing and I was in a lot more pain my father was ready to leave.

    For the second my son visited, my mother and my ex-mil dropped by. The hospital is pretty open to letting you have whomever you want to come in.

    This time I want to be alone with my husband. I want the kids to come by throughout or at least the end when the baby is just newly born. (maybe come by when it's almost time and come in just after) I doubt they will want to...teen boys will probably want to be at home.

    If a relative wanted to be in I don't think I would care as long as they are gone for the pushing.

    EDIT IT is possible to have them not see anything. I was clothed during labour and during any checks people would either leave or go behind the curtain. (It was a large room that could be separated by a curtain)

  • Hell NO!!!! My dad doesn't even want to to be in the delivery room.  My mom of course and DH will be in there but are only allowed to look at my face only, I probably let my MIL in also just incase DH gets sick or passes outmkjn
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  • No way! I just had DH and my mom! That was plenty lol!
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  • blush64blush64 member
    imageholly321:

    My BFF had her dad in the delivery room.   She claims he couldn't have seen anything.  I know I haven't really experience childbirth, but I can't comprehend how he didn't see anything/

    I personally don't want my dad in there, and he doesn't want to be in there.

     

    If you are clothed during labour and the person leaves when they check internally and during the pushing, it is possible for someone not to see anything. My father was in the room during labour for my first and he left everytime a nurse or doctor came near me and he left during the pushing. He saw nothing. I had a nightgown on the whole time. I have seen people who labour in very little clothing but that was not me. I could not be comfortable like that. I have a friend who was naked. I wouldn't be able to do it.

  • I'm okay with my dad being around in the beginning... but once I'm ready to start pushing, I don't want anyone but DH in the room with me.  I've considered my mom or MIL, but... no.  The idea of anyone but DH being there gives me anxiety, no matter how much I love them.
  • Hellz no! Just DH and I in the delivery room. Everyone else was invited after we made it to recovery an hour or so after the birth with DS. We will do it the same way with any future babies.
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  • I had my DH and my mom. My dad is not in my life, but even if he was I wouldn't want him there. It would just be weird for me. I wouldn't want my step dad there either.
  • One of the reasons we will plan a home birth is because I don't want a big hullabaloo. I want things calm and as peaceful as possible. I don't want a ton of people around that I feel like I have "host" while I'm giving birth.

    Even if I have a hospital birth I wouldn't want them there until after the delivery. I love my family dearly, but having them there would only stress me out. My parents are rather opinionated people, and MH and I are making different decisions regarding birth and parenting than they did. Their choices were totally valid and worked well for them; they are just not a good fit for us (we're kinda hippie/crunchy). I don't want to have to hear their opinions and criticism when I'm trying to push a baby out of my vagina, nurse for the first time, or I'm already extremely emotional.

    Most of all, I'm excited that the birth of our first child will be an intimate joy and memory that MH and I can share together. 

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  • kacellekacelle member
    Not a chance.  With DD, it was just me, DH, and a doula.
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  • With DD it was my FI and FMIL because my own mom wasn't there so I wanted her instead. I could have cared less if my FFIL because he was hanging out watching the football game. But he chose to leave.

    With my next child it will be just me and my FI. Because I will have my ILs watch DD. 

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  • imagetopchef33:

    imagenyc7781:
    No.  I will have my husband....that's it.  I don't even want my mother there because I just don't like the idea. Personally I think it's private. Besides the staff, I don't need anyone except DH to share the moment with. 

    I'm w/you 100%. I know my mom is going to pull the 'but you're my daughter/I'm your mother' card and assume she gets to do whatever she wants. I know she'll try and make me feel bad about it but oh well. 

    I definitely do not want anyone in there besides H and the hospital staff when it's time to push. If I'm feeling ok beforehand then yes people can come in. 

    My mom does this too. When we got married she gave me a guilt trip about wanting both her and my dad to walk me down the aisle. I was going to ask them both to do it anyway, she just never gave me the chance to ask before she decided to guilt me...sigh...

    Now that I'm married and we live farther away, its gotten better. 

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  • ShaylizShayliz member
    If allowed, both of my parents and my MIL will have the option to be there. Love my dad and we are super close. Not sure he will want to be there, though!
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  • No freaking way.  And with the gown up to my armpits and a huge mirror there is no way he wouldn't have seen it all.

     

    There was me, DH, OB, MW, MW assistant and a NICU team of at least 4 people and that was all fine.  But my dad?  No. 

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  • Oh hellllllsss no!  DH and I only!
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  • Absolutely not! My dad will not be in the delivery room. I would like it to be just DH and me. If DH happens to be deployed when I give birth it will just be my mom in the delivery room, maybe my sisters but not likely. I could see MIL wanting to be in the room, but I am not close to her and she would make it more about her than anything else so she would not be allowed in.
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  • No WAY!!! Just me and my DH
  • The father Ive know my entire life died a few weeks short of my 21st bday back in 2003.My Bio father ive only talked to 1 time and honestly I dont even want him to be a part of my life so my answer is NO dad will not be in the delivery room.
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  • No way. I would like DH and my mom in there, no one else. My mom is an RN and I'm also very close w/ her, so I feel good about her being present.
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  • imagemagnoliasonfire:
    No way. I would like DH and my mom in there, no one else. My mom is an RN and I'm also very close w/ her, so I feel good about her being present.
    I feel the same way. DH and my mom. My mom is also a RN and has been with me for anything medical, I would feel better with her there. Dad can come vist before and after.




  • No way in freaking hell would have my dad in the delivery room. I'm having DH and my best friend. And while I would love to have my mother in there with me, she would unfortunately too ill to be in the room.
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