Adoption

Did you just know?

When you were looking for an agency, did you just know when you found the right one? 

As I said in my intro we had a few meetings set up this week to talk with agencies.  We met with one last night and I left with this great feelingof peace and calmness. We met with the lady for about an hour and at the end we were talking about our own families, sharing pictures of pets on our phones, and she was asking MH security questions. Big Smile

They are a VERY VERY small agency.  They placed 10 babies last year but currently only have 6 families on the waiting list.  The fees are great, so so so much lower than other places we're looking at.  She said they work on our time frame and could move as fast/slow as we wanted.  

MH woke up this morning and asked me if I wanted to cancel our appt this afternoon.   I told him I would be OK with that.  Hmmm, maybe we did find *the one*.....

 

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Re: Did you just know?

  • Yes, we had pretty much the same experience as you. Good luck!
    Married on 3.20.2004. It took 30 month, 2 failed adoptions and IVF for our first miracle. We have had 9 foster kids since he was born and started the domestic adoption process when he was 10 month old, we had 4 failed matches in that time. After our daughter was born we brought her home and spent 2 weeks fearing we might lose her because of complications that came up. But Praise God all went through and she is ours forever! Expecting again after IVF Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • We only attended one info session at an agency and decided that was the one for us.  We had looked at several online, so it's not like we just went with the first thing, but we definitely feel secure in our decision.
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  • We were so overwhelmed at first trying to decide on an agency and couldn't figure out how we would narrow it down. After getting information from several agencies on costs, wait times, services, policies, etc. we had 3 that we were deciding between. We had phone calls with them and knew right after the second phone call that we would go with them- they were SO helpful on the phone and we didn't feel rushed at all even though we had a TON of questions. They had everything we were looking for and it just felt "right". We ended up canceling the third phone call. Obviously there are a lot of factors that you have to consider but after we had narrowed it down that far we felt like we just knew it was right for us. Good luck!
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  • I wish I would have the experience that you did Kdg.  That's what I keep looking for to know if we have the right agency....   I'm jealous.  Smile

    I've wondered this too.  I've researched a ton of agencies online.  I found one that I would sign with in a heartbeat.... but they aren't licensed for my state.  According to our state laws, they must be to work with us.  Sad  We've worked our way to another agency... but it feels like I'm picking them because I don't have a ton of other options.  And there is one agency that I feel like we should just take a look at... The reviews aren't that great from BMs.  (And I absolutely want an agency that treats the BMs well.)  But something keeps nudging me that I need to give them a closer look... This is nerve racking.

    Me: 32, DH: 45... TTC #1 since May 2010
    July - Nov 2011: Testing with OB... OB said everything looks good
    March - Sept 2012: Moved to RE.. 4 treatment cycles - responses of one or no follicles
    09.03.12: Diagnosed Poor Ovarian Response.. DE IVF only option
    Feb - Nov 2012: Pursued Adoption. That door slammed shut.
    12.23.12: Surprise BFP (first ever)... 12.25 - 12.31: Natural M/C
  • I felt like we did, but DH was torn. There was a tiny agency we talked to, and the woman we spoke with turned me off immediately. But  man, the fees were low. Then we talked to a large, long-running agency and I LOVED them. But the fees were higher. It took DH a couple of months to commit, but that's his personality anyway.

    IMO it wouldn't hurt to talk to the second agency. If you still love the first one, they're not going anywhere.

    So excited for you!

  • imageGnomeSweetGnome:
    We only attended one info session at an agency and decided that was the one for us.  We had looked at several online, so it's not like we just went with the first thing, but we definitely feel secure in our decision.

     Ditto this.  My hubby was pretty apprehensive before we attended the orientation at our agency.  Totally freaked out by the cost, the belief that he'd have trouble bonding with an adopted baby, and fears about choosing an open adoption situation.  The orientation made him feel a lot more relaxed about the whole process, and that, coupled with the fact that I'm friends with a couple social workers in my area who highly recommended our agency, sold us.  

  • We figured out pretty quickly which agency we preferred.  We gathered information from quite a few and made appointments with 2.   We attended to meetings for the one agency as well - one was about domestic adoption and one was about international. 

    I didn't like the 2nd agency at all.  We were uncomfortable with some of the things the director said to us.  She asked us which one of us wanted to adopt more than the other and that said something about how one spouse always wants to adopt more than the other or has to convince them...I realize that it takes some couples a while to get on the same page and be ready, but it was a really weird thing to say to a couple that was sitting there ready to start the process.

    We LOVE the agency we picked and we're very happy with everything they did to help us.

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  • Not really. We were still exploring many other situations after "signing up" with our agency. It is very small and new so I didn't really have faith that they would find us our future baby. Until our daughter was placed in our arms I wasn't 100% sold on our agency.
    June 2010-Lap
    b2b Injectable IUI #1 7/25/10 & 7/26/10 = BFP beta 14dpIUI = 133 MC 9/14 at 9 weeks
    b2b Injectable IUI #2 12/5/10 & 12/6/10 = BFN
    IVF #1 ER 3/28/11 ET 3 embryos 3/31/11= BFN
    b2b Injectable IUI#3 6/28/11 & 6/29/11 = BFN
    PAIF/SAIF Welcome :)

    Submitted Adoption Application on 6/1/2011
    Homestudy 7/19/2011
    IVF#2 CX due to Adoption Match
    We were blessed with our daughter through the gift of adoption
    IVF #2.1 ET 2 embryos 2/14/13 7 frostiesLilypie First Birthday tickers

  • We had a great feeling after our informational session this weekend but we're forcing ourselves to talk with at least two more agencies. I think our minds are made up though. 

    Good luck :) 

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    Little Slick
    Born 6.26.10
    Forever a Family 11.26.12
  • I absolutely knew the minute I spoke with them. Ours was small too, like your potential one, only doing about 10 adoptions the year before we went active. Once we met our social worker, we felt totally at ease and so happy with our choice!

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