Update on sharing my blog

Petunia844 · April 2012

So I sent it to our immediate family's except for my bro and sil who is about to have her first baby. At dinner last night dh asked if anyone responded, I think what he really wanted to know is if his family responded. I personally was not at all happy with his parents after Peyton passed, they didn't come to see us, they never even asked to talk to me...they really only even talked about him to dh for the first week if that. I know they were upset...but I felt like they offered an unbelievable lack of support to their son and to me after we lost our child. So even though he didnt say it I think dh was wondering what they had to say about the blog....they haven't said anything. If you looked at my inbox you wouldn't even know they read it. I was hoping sending them the blog might open the door for them to offer the support I felt like we wanted from them...I guess there's still hope for them to respond, but so far nada. I just can't imagine being so distant when your son lost his child.

fluttergirlmoonchild79 · April 2012

I'm so sorry sweetheart. I've read your blog and I think it's absolutely wonderful. You're a very talented writer. I'm so sorry your in-laws have been so un-supportive of you during this extremely difficult time. I always hate to hear when people like us seem to lose friends and family when we need them the most. Perhaps DH could say something to them (if he hasn't already). My in-laws have been the opposite - bombarding us at every turn but they've always been like that. I like to believe family is what you make it, not necessarily by relation. I like to think of us all as family - sisters in fact. {{HUGS}}

johnnys june · April 2012

*hugs*

Funny, I had a similar situation. When I transitioned to my "new blog" interface/design/moving forward, I sent out an email letting my closest friends and family know (I did the same with my original blog for Logan). I only heard feedback from bumpie friends. No one else has commented, not even my mom, who commented the first time.

I wouldn't worry about it, sweetie. You do your blog for you, not them. I just read another girls blog where she said how thankful she was for her blog because it was "free therapy"...for me...it's so true. It's my means to grieve, heal, vent, cry, laugh, and rediscover who I am. For the past few days I've noticed the "2 followers" vs. my previous 13 followers and it disheartens me. But I have to remind myself, I do this for me...no one else. I enjoy both blogging and reading other blogs. And, at the end of the day, if I'm the only one that gets anything out of it, it's still a success!

Your blog is wonderful, lovey. No matter what, you do have people that read it and you do make a difference!

Carolee · April 2012

(((HUGS))) I'm sorry your DH's family hasn't been supportive through everything. That must be hard for him. I'm glad you have each other to lean on.

StephK86 · April 2012

My SO's parents are awful and have never been supportive. His mother actually lost her biological daughter at 16 (he's adopted) so you think she would be able to connect with him. Not at all. She basically told us we need to move on with our lives just days after Gavin's funeral. In fact when Gavin was being rushed to the hospital and SO called his mom her response was "I'm busy right now, I'm on my way to church." Oh yeah lady you're really holy let me tell ya. They never visited Gavin in the NICU nor did they when he was home. They only saw him once when SO tricked me by stopping by their house on the way to my mom's. Yet they tried to make his funeral all about them and invited a ton of people. The whole time they played the role of bereaved grandparents when really they didn't give a care.

I hate them and I feel so bad for SO. He needed their love and support and still does. I just can't imagine how he feels.

I am so sorry your DH has to go through the same thing. I do not get how a parent can not support their child when they need them the most. Or how they aren't sad themselves over the loss of their grandchild. HUGS to you and your DH.

Petunia844 · April 2012

StephK86:
My SO's parents are awful and have never been supportive. His mother actually lost her biological daughter at 16 (he's adopted) so you think she would be able to connect with him. Not at all. She basically told us we need to move on with our lives just days after Gavin's funeral. In fact when Gavin was being rushed to the hospital and SO called his mom her response was "I'm busy right now, I'm on my way to church." Oh yeah lady you're really holy let me tell ya. They never visited Gavin in the NICU nor did they when he was home. They only saw him once when SO tricked me by stopping by their house on the way to my mom's. Yet they tried to make his funeral all about them and invited a ton of people. The whole time they played the role of bereaved grandparents when really they didn't give a care.
I hate them and I feel so bad for SO. He needed their love and support and still does. I just can't imagine how he feels.
I am so sorry your DH has to go through the same thing. I do not get how a parent can not support their child when they need them the most. Or how they aren't sad themselves over the loss of their grandchild. HUGS to you and your DH.

Wow, his parents sound awful, I'm so sorry. I know DH's parents are sad and I know it's hard for them because his Mom apparently talks to my mom about it... but I'm like WTF, talk to ME, talk to your SON!! We're the ones who need to know how you feel. Ugh. I just hope it doesn't change my relationship with them forever, but if they never say anything to me about my son, I don't know how to just get over that.

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