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2nd Trimester
002994182
member
long vent: thought 2nd tri was all butterflies and rainbows??
002994182
member
Just past the 14 week mark and somehow I expected things would only be smooth sailing for the next few months. Instead, I am feeling more hormonal than a teenager and stressing.
Here's the story: I've dealt with food issues in the past and this pregnancy I've been really proud of myself for eating what sounds good, and not being critical of myself or my diet (I'm not throwing back bags of Cheetos every day, but I'm not stressing that sometimes another helping of mac & cheese sounds better than vegetables).
Anyway, I hit week 14 and on Monday I read the bump week 14 - it focuses all on diet and getting enough exercise. So I start thinking about it - am I making the right choices? Then I go see my OB Tues and it's a quick appointment, but as he's walking out the door he says "oh yeah, and stay away from those simple carbs." He goes on to name just about every food I'm enjoying, including telling me to watch my fruit intake and MILK?! Maybe I misunderstood, but I'm freaking out. I try to balance out eating whole grain with simple carbs, but I'm still sort of reeling. And I am still maintaining exercise without overdoing it, but what THE HECK?!
I was doing so good and now I feel like I'm starting to doubt myself and I want to get rid of these feelings before they snowball into something I can't shake. I'm telling myself I haven't gained too much yet, I'm get a balanced diet with variety, I'm still getting some exercise, I just need to relax.
Anyone out there had any freak outs or am I the only one feeling this crazy?
Either way, thanks for listening. I don't post much (after my first mc I had this superstition that if I posted to the 1st Tri board something might happen... And now I sound officially wacko).
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Re: long vent: thought 2nd tri was all butterflies and rainbows??
Thanks for the reassurance! I can admit that moderation hasn't always been my strong suit. Not that I overdo it, but just the opposite. I can recognize that sometimes my perspective is a little warped and I tend to be overly critical of myself.
That's why when I told DH I was freaking out about all this stuff he did sort of what your mom does - reminded me how much I DO do this things in moderation and that I really am making a good little home for our baby.
PS... I bet your mom has some crazy stories.
I have tried to eat healthier and watch my diet since BFP, cut out the no no's (alcohol, raw food (not like I ate raw food), etc)
But there are somethings that I feel it's better for the baby if I am not stressed over certain things. For example, I'm drinking a pepsi right now. Should I be drinking water? Probably, but it's comforting to me, reduces my headaches and I keep it under the 200mg of caffeine per day.
If you are eating somewhat healthy (avoiding known harmful foods), taking your prenatal and not putting on 5+ per week I'm sure you are doing just fine and I wouldn't worry that much about it.
Fruit has a lot of sugar- are you diabetic? and milk - weird - maybe low fat? to eat?
I have to say - 2nd trimester is not easy at all- Im 18 weeks and still have M/s and I have vertigo. I am fatigued and Im only 31- so TRUST me - 2nd trimester is not easy. pregnancy is NOt easy at all.
Good luck. If you are unsure what your dr said you shold have asked for clarification - or you can call.
to clarify: I'm not diabetic, he was basically saying that diets high in simple sugars can lead to bigger babies. He said a bigger baby, while cute, isn't necessarily the healthiest/safest for me during labor - I'm only 5'2".
He didn't say cut out all milk or fruit, but he specifically made sure I wasn't eating fruit with every meal. His point was that simple sugars, such as those found in white bread, fruit, milk, sweets, and other carbs, should only be in moderation.
Part of my minor freak out was that when I'm nausea (which has been often) those foods are my go-to. The other part of my minor freak out is that it made me start to over-analyze all my choices. I just want to do what's best for my baby.
Thanks for the Pepsi example - I appreciated this!
Thank you for the reassurance that I'm not the only one. I have had such a difficult time with this pregnancy. I always thought I'd sail through pregnancy, I've always been healthy, active and really positive. Then I got pregnant and it was like a freight train ran me over! And I'm STILL feeling exhausted, nauseas (although not as bad as 1st tri), and waaaay hormonal. I know it's all worth it, I don't doubt that for a second. But after awhile it wears on you. Then I see a post like this and it helps me to relax and realize that I'm not the only one having a tough time.
So, thanks!
that seems like a weird comment for a doctor to make if you are not gaining too much weight.
I ate and eat a lot of fruit... and with my first, i started at 110 pounds and only gained 25 through week 41.5 when I was induced. DS was only 6 llbs 9 oz. I did not gain any weight in that pregnancy until week 25.
This time... I am only 14.5 weeks and have already gained 3 pounds and my doctor said that was perfect. I eat very healthy (as I always do and exercise a lot)... but there is nothing wrong with eating fruit and drinking lowfat milk. The fruit "might" make sense if you were diabetic or were obese or had already gained too much weight, but this doctor off to me... especially if he knows your eating history issues.
good luck and hang in there!!
honestly it sounds like you have a super conscientious OB. i know because i have one, and my last pregnancy was a lot of mental anguish with all of what you're feeling. i'm 5'0 and got the same "you don't want a big baby" spiel, and every appointment i went to it seemed like she was telling me not to eat carbs, sugar, and pretty much anything that tasted good. it had sort of the opposite effect on me and all of a sudden i wanted all the things i couldn't have and it was a real struggle. i left the dr's office in tears on more than one occasion. in the end, i gained 50 lbs (lost it all +7 after the baby) and my baby was 7lb 9 oz. but i did end up with pre-eclampsia. i think that has more to do with sodium than carbs and sugars though.
this pregnancy she seems to be a lot better. i have gained 9 lb in my first tri, but i also started out 7 lbs lighter than i did when i got pregnant the first time so maybe i just look better, i don't know. but keep your current attitude and don't let your doctor's comments get to you. ask your doctor specifically "does this affect my health or the baby's health, or is the size of the baby your main concern?" because there was a post on here recently about how much weight you gained and how big your baby was, and it was really surprising - it seemed like the people who gained more had smaller babies. granted, it was just a bump post and not a scientific poll, but all i kept thinking when i read that post was about how much stress i was under in situations like a baby shower where there were all sorts of cookies and the guilt i would get, not just inner guilt, but from DH and my mom, who were aware of what the doctor had said.
eat the best that you can, avoid the big no-nos and relax.
I am right there with you.
I'm weighing a little heavier than my doc would like (ok, I'm weighing closer to what they'd like me to weigh when I go in to deliver, still 17 weeks away). I went to go see a CNM (not my regular OB, but I needed to be seen) for a gallbladder attack, and she yelled at me because I'm grossly overweight and I need to think about what I'm doing to my baby. And because I was having a gallbladder attack clearly I am loading up on fried mayo wrapped in bacon (EW), not that I have a family history of bad gallbladders, no clearly my new found "freedom" of being pregnant has made me think eating out of control is acceptable.
Honestly I don't know where the wight is coming from, I'm eating sensibly, while trying to ward off nausea (now nausea caused by my gallbladder) which can be difficult. In my first tri I was being treated for hyperemesis and still managed to put on 5 pounds, I don't know how that is possible. Seriously, how is it possible to put on weight when a drink of water sends you racing to the bathroom, for an hour, while you vomit everything you have in your body out? And I put on 5 pounds, it wasn't until I had to go to the ER for the first time my OB was willing to consider my morning sickness was a little out of the ordinary. He also gives me less crap about weighing a little more than this witch.
It can be very disheartening when anyone is negative about anything we do, we are trying our best to have healthy pregnancies to have healthy babies. I went out to lunch with a friend of mine who is farther along than I am and showing more. We both ordered the same thing and this random guy in the restaurant started heckling her about what she was eating to the point that it made her cry. Good part, our meals were comped; Bad part, some jackass who doesn't even have a medical degree had the audacity to criticize someone else's diet. It's rude and it happens, from all around, and it sucks.
Thanks everyone, if nothing else this shows that A. everyone's pregnancy is different, but also B. that there are lots of similar worries out there and it's nice to feel supported.
I know I could ask my doc about how much weight to gain at the next appt, but I don't think knowing a certain number (gain exactly X by Y date) will help me, in fact it would probably make me more stressed. And as you can see from what people have said, each pregnancy (even for the same woman) takes a different path, but the babies can still turn out healthy. I'm just going to stick with my previous game plan: I'm doing what feels healthy for my baby and if the OBs haven't told me I'm gaining too much yet, then I'm not going to focus on it.
Everyone else who mentioned similar concerns - be gentle with yourself and give yourself credit for all that you're already doing to take care of that growing baby! Thanks again