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TTC After a Loss
Alright I'm gonna beat a dead horse..
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Alright I'm gonna beat a dead horse..
I'm late to the party, but this is too much drama. I agree with Vanessa (and several other girls). And I'm not "new" to these message boards at all, but seriously? You can't dictate how anyone posts. Don't like it? Skip it.
ETA: After I posted, I realized I sound like an a-hole. I'm just saying that there's not much need to dictate how others post..
Bio
Like I said in my post (the bolded section), I don't think this board is too snarky right now. Not at all. I think it's fine. I've seen it much, much worse. My point was that I think the notion that it's too P&R is the wrong one; the P&R isn't taking the place of useful information and support. Is it more P&R lately? Probably. But that's a good thing, not a bad thing.
ive never seen a board with so many rules...
Wait, who is this directed at? The people saying to stop being so damn snarky or the people who are being "snarky."
♥BFP #1 "Spawn"- 02/23/11 | EDD: 11/01/11 | natural m/c 03/20/11 @7w5d♥
♥BFP #2 "Offspring"- 11/10/12 | EDD: 07/25/13 | incomplete m/c 12/14/12 @8w1d | D&C 12/21/12♥
♥BFP #3 "Progeny" - 02/16/15 | It's a BOY!! | EDD: 10/17/15 | BD: 10/23/15♥
All AL Always Welcome
Agreed
Bio
Yes, I regret getting involved in this conversation at all. I wish I had just ignored it.
Based on what I can tell... neither really. Just to everyone that says "don't post like this" or "only post this if you _____" or "respond this way"... kinda stuff.
Bio
No one in particular... its not about scenario in particular either... just something ive noticed about the board...
I never said that people couldn't post what they want.. I was just saying the board needs a reality check instead of shoving rainbows up people's asses
Post whatever you want. But that really doesn't help people when someone tells someoen that is3DPO and having "m/s" that they are totes pregnant. Those are the posts that are ridiculous.
Me too. I wish it hadn't been brought up again this morning. I'm through discussing it, we're all just going around in circles. Everyone's had their say, I don't know why this is such a big deal.
BFP #1: 8/2011 ** EDD: 5/9/2012 ** Missed m/c discovered at 13 weeks
BFP #2: 4/4/2012 ** EDD: 12/24/12 ** Born: Charlotte "Charlie" Olivia 12/18/2013, 8 lbs 1 oz, 21 inches!!!
I usually dont either, i find my opinion never really conscides with the majority of the board...
BFP #2 12-6-11 and 12-7-11; EDD 8-17-12. US 6w6d measuring 5w6d. Misoprostol Assisted m/c 1-16-12 at 9w3d.
<a href="http://s109.photobucket.com/albums/n56/katharine25/?action=view
I think at this point we're just talking circles.
If you want to be snarky, go for it. If you p!ss someone off, put your BGP on and deal with the downfall.
If you want to be nice, go for it. If you p!ss someone off, put on your BGP and deal with the downfall.
The only thing I'm asking, and have been, is if you have an issue with someone, take it up with that person. Stop with the cryptic global statements and deal with the person directly. If you don't want to, fine, but shut up about it then.
♥BFP #1 "Spawn"- 02/23/11 | EDD: 11/01/11 | natural m/c 03/20/11 @7w5d♥
♥BFP #2 "Offspring"- 11/10/12 | EDD: 07/25/13 | incomplete m/c 12/14/12 @8w1d | D&C 12/21/12♥
♥BFP #3 "Progeny" - 02/16/15 | It's a BOY!! | EDD: 10/17/15 | BD: 10/23/15♥
All AL Always Welcome
First, I want to say this whole thread makes no sense to me. I haven't seen anyone talking about testing at 2dpo in quite sometime so I'm not sure where that's coming from. I also haven't seen any over-the-top snark or any over-the-top P&R. Also, VQ, you don't need to speak for other people. If anyone has an issue they should feel free to speak up. I don't know what the board was like before November, and honestly I don't care. It's March 2012 and this is what the board is now. Everyone needs to deal with it.
Secondly, I want to address the smelly feet mess of a thread, because let's be honest - that's what broke the camel's back here. I try to stay out of posts that I don't care for...I am not mean or rude to people (most of the time). But if I have something to say, I will say it in my own way because that is the only way I know. I am abrasive by nature. I work with a bunch of men whom I have to be an aggressive b!tch to on a daily basis to be taken seriously. I was having a horrid night and I made a snide remark, which I still feel was blown way out of proportion. Tashpede gave attitude right back, because she was having a horrid day. It escalated into something ugly, and my only regret is not having taken it to PMs. Would the outcome have been different? Probably not, but at least it wouldn't have been dragged out for 2 days.
The only person that had something productive to say, Maddielynn, did it in the OP. Everything after that - a passive aggressive jab at me in a clicky poll, things about people being "whoreish" and needing their vaginas douched, was immature and making a mountain out of a molehill. It's over.
Can we just stop this, please? The thing that makes this board great is that all us women of different backgrounds and personalities can bond and feel accepted & understood. I don't want to feel like I can't come here, I know a lot of you don't want to feel that way either.
Sorry about the novel. I tried to condense it as much as possible without leaving out key points.
Sorry, I was busy typing when you posted this...it should've ended on this note.
I can certainly get on board with that. *starts slow clap*
Bio
THANK YOU
BFP#1 10/1/2011. Our perfect little girl, Her heart stopped @ 12w1d. D&E 11/23/11
BFP#2 3/13/12 Weird CP/Possible EP @ 6w0d
BFP#3 5/28/12 CP @ 5w0d
BFP/WTF#4 10/26/12 CP
BFP#5 12/10/12 EDD 8/23/2013
All I have to say is that I agree with this 1000%...
I apologize to anyone that I have offended since I joined the boards... it was never my intention. I want to apologize to Dee for getting snarky back. I know it's not an excuse, but with the arrival of AF and all the other bull I had been dealing with I responded with hormones and emotions rather than sense and logic. She planted the fuel, I lit the match and neither of us wanted to bring the water to put it out. We were both equally at fault and I just want to squash it and let it die. She has given me support on here and I knew it was out of her character which is why I got bent out of shape like I did. My feelings were a bit hurt and instead of handling it like I should have by sending a PM, I made it public. Again, I apologize.
I feel like all of this has become non-productive. People are getting their feelings hurt for uneccesay reasons. Because of this, I will be taking a step away from The Bump for a long while.
This board is such an amazing support system for so many women (of all kinds) to stand together on common ground. Whether you're bubbly and optimistic or just plain exhausted and just feeling bitter - we are all different and all deserve support regardless.
Also,
I don't think VQ meant for the OP to turn into this... and I apologize that it has.
Honestly, I thought this board had the perfect amount of snark, reality-check and P&R. I never saw it to be too snarky or too P&R. I still think that. Now, my opinion might be a bit skewed. I'm on the Loss board a whole lot more than TTCAL and I don't reply to every post on here. I barely check in when I can, lol! I do give support as much as I can, though.
Someone mentioned seeing a number of cliques the other day; I haven't seen any. A few mentioned it's too nice here; I've seen a bit of snark as well. TTCAL has such a high turnover rate, the too-much P&R issue will always exist in some form. It'll go away for a while but it'll come back in a few months and so on and so forth.
I'm not saying to 'get over it'. But I just learned to accept it as is. If someone tests at 3DPO and they're boo-hoo-hooing, that's their problem and I'm not going to comfort them. If anything, I'll probably ignore their post with an eyeroll and a not-so-nice utterance.
But if someone tests at 15 DPO and they're very upset with a BFN, then yes, I will offer words of encouragement. I view posts as a hierachy of sorts: if it's silly, I'll ignore it. If it's helpful, I'll support it.
I had a post just the other day about how freakin' expensive HPTs were and a few ladies gave me wonderful tips. I loved that! A few women have posted on DH issues, Clomid issues, TTA annoyances and I support them.
But if you're posting some First World problems sh*t; sorry, you gets no love here.
First bold section: I am very shocked with that! Do you remember what kind of context that was in? Like, was it a general frustration with having to answer the same questions over and over? Or was it in the context of wishing newbies wouldn't ask those questions? That is the only thing I can think of and how someone on this board would actually say they're sick of newbies questions is if they were saying it with the context of "since i've been here for 2 years i've seen the same question 100 billion times, and it get's a little old for me to answer them." rather than the context of "I wish newbies would stop posting their silly questions!"
Second bold section: I know this is going to sound really mean, and I don't like that it is this way. But sometimes when a troll, phisher, drive-by or goat stops by... it's fun to pull out the PIPs. It allows us to blow off a little steam in our own journeys and it helps us bond in the process. That's the way I see it, and have always felt after I pulled out a few PIPs.
Aurora Rose born sleeping at 35w on 4-21-10
BFP#2 {Almond} - 2.1.11 EDD 10.12.11 C/P 2.11.11