Do you ever feel out of your mind for getting pregnant?

Tarta · February 2012

I don't mean this in a negative way necessarily. It's just that, when I really wrap my head around all the crazy stuff pregnancy entails, well...it just seems sort of nuts that women ever want to do this!

My first pregnancy I was so overwhelmed by the morning sickness (which lasted 7 1/2 months), fatigue, superhuman nose, emotional swings, sleep loss, tiny bladder, random body pain and weight gain etc. etc. I declared I would never do it again. My sister assured me that amnesia would set in at some point and I'd find myself right where I am. She was so right.

But even knowing how normal it is to feel this way. I have in all honesty wondered if my purposely getting pregnant again is a sign of serious lack of judgement. And now that I'm back in my psycho pregnant body I know I'm gonna have to start seeing my therapist again. Whether or not I'm crazy.

Someone tell me you've felt this way.

Tarta · February 2012

I do realize this will sound totally insensitive to anyone who's struggled to get pregnant or have children. It's just how my hormonal self feels tonight. Ask me tomorrow and I'll probably feel differently.

blindvictory · February 2012

The first time I got pregnant, I had a lot of "Are we SURE we're really ready for this!??" thoughts. And then we lost that baby.

This time around, I haven't questioned it at all. I am so ready for this baby emotionally that I just don't care about the other stuff. It'll all fall into place. All I want is a healthy LO in my arms.

on_a_whim · February 2012

This will be our first child and I am really looking forward to everything that is to come - good and bad, ups and downs. I'm sure, just like yourself, there are plenty of 2nd time (+) moms who may feel differently for one reason or another... and of course, you are entitled to feel how you do.

After spending many, many months TTC... and then experiencing a loss, I could care less about all the "crazy stuff". Just as PP stated, I am just looking forward to having a healthy LO in my arms 6 months from now.

Tarta · February 2012

blindvictory:
The first time I got pregnant, I had a lot of "Are we SURE we're really ready for this!??" thoughts. And then we lost that baby.

This time around, I haven't questioned it at all. I am so ready for this baby emotionally that I just don't care about the other stuff. It'll all fall into place. All I want is a healthy LO in my arms.

Thank you. This is the kind of reality check I need right now. My last pregnancy and post-partum was really difficult for me. I thought this time around would be different (and in many ways it is and will be different) but this first tri has been more intense than last time and I have fears that all the difficult things from last time will play out again and maybe all at a more intense level. I guess when I wrote my original post I wasn't realizing that.

When I'm feeling really horrible I do try to remind myself that the physical symptoms of pregnancy are a walk in the park compared to the symptoms of losing a sweet baby. I'd forgotten that tonight. And not everyone has the luxury of forgetting that. Thank you again. You are right.

bmv1980 · February 2012

Sometimes, but not because of the issues that involve being pregnant. I have a 13 y/o a 3 y/o and I work in a preschool...so sometimes I wonder if I'm ready for another little person. Baby, yes...teenager...not so much

I'm sure that it will all be fine though. I am looking forward to another addition to our family.

damabo80 · February 2012

I'm an IFer + multiple loss-er, and yes, I have those thoughts. Mostly at 3:30a when DD won't go the fluck to sleep, and instead just wants to nurse every 30 minutes all night long.

Then I think, what the hell were we thinking having them so close together?? I just hope #2 does not meet all of Dr Sears's requirements for a "high needs" baby. I'm just now able to put DD down for 5 minutes without a total meltdown so I can take a crap without holding her at the same time.

ilovelife · February 2012

When I think of being up all night with a newborn, then having to be up in the morning with a toddler, I think "hmmm maybe we should have waited". Thats the only part that scares me. I won't be able to sleep when baby sleeps this time around and I hate asking for help. Actually I refuse to ask the il's for help. Lo was colicky and I adked mil to come over so I could rest, she talked about it for weeks and told everyone who then offered the most ridiculous advice ever. I'll figure it out though! I'm excited about everything else!!!

MainelyFoolish · February 2012

Yes! It took over three years for my preg-nesia to set in from my first child. I've already told DH that after this kid, I'm really, really, really done! He chuckled and said "I've heard that before."

Manx4 · February 2012

I don't think I'm literally crazy but I do wonder at times what the F was I thinking having them so close in age.

My son is turning 1 in less than two weeks - he'll be 18 months when this baby arrives. I know it'll all work out but I have spent nights laying awake with a million "how am I going to do this with two when I struggle at times with one!?" thoughts going through my head.

But I remind myself how quickly the first year has already flown by and the infant stage won't last forever. This baby will be mobile in no time and I'll have different struggles to deal with.

We'll figure it out - just like plenty of families before us did.

brideandbreve · February 2012

blindvictory:
The first time I got pregnant, I had a lot of "Are we SURE we're really ready for this!??" thoughts. And then we lost that baby.

This time around, I haven't questioned it at all. I am so ready for this baby emotionally that I just don't care about the other stuff. It'll all fall into place. All I want is a healthy LO in my arms.

Yes

Pearl16 · February 2012

I felt this way a lot during my first pregnancy. I was very sick during the first trimester, and had terrible hip pain during the third - not to mention all of the other little things no one tells you about. I would actually get angry at other women who had been pregnant before for not warning me how miserable it would be, and thought women who said they loved being pregnant were certifiably insane.

Now that I have DD, I know how worth it it is in the end. Did I forget how terrible pregnancy/delivery/recovery was last time around? Absolutely not. I don't think I ever will. But it really is worth it.

MrsRidge2005 · February 2012

I've had multiple losses this past year and am sooo happy about being pregnant and having a healthy looking baby. That being said pregnancy isn't just a super fun joy ride either, espeically the first few months. Between the m/s, the anxiety and the exhaustion I think it's perfectly normal to have moments where you think "what have I gotten myself into."

In the end it's completely worth it though! Can't wait to hold my LO in September.

no1tish · February 2012

I can relate! I've wanted to be a mom soooo bad for so long, and now that I'm actually pregnant, I'm having doubts about whether or not I can actually do this. Will I be a good mom? Can DH and I really afford a baby? How will we adjust to this big change individually and in our marriage? I'm already mourning the loss of my old life! Pregnancy is not as easy as I thought it would be -- I experience all kinds of aches and pains, I'm queasy all the time, my energy level has reached an all time low, and I'm only 10 weeks! I feel like this little baby has taken over my body. I actually told my best friend the other day that I'm a little disappointed that pregnancy isn't all that enjoyable for me.

That said, all I want is a healthy labor, delivery, and LO. Those same annoying aches and pains can send me into a panic (I had a miscarriage in September), and God forbid, if anything happened in this pregnancy, I would be devastated.

I don't fully understand how you feel, but I don't think you are wrong, or bad, or selfish for feeling the way you do either, even if this is your 2nd or 3rd time around. I'm sure it is all worth it in the end.

SavGardiner · February 2012

i'm in a similar boat to blindvictory here. we tried for 4 years to get pregnant. when it finally happened in august, i doubted myself and our situation... did i lose all the weight i wanted to before, am i in the right place emotionally for this, CAN i do this... and then we lost it.

This time i question nothing. I puke daily, and less than a minute later i'm smiling... this has been anything but an easy pregnancy, and i will take it. it is all a daily reminder that i am still pregnant... and that we will have baby G here in 6 months...

That being said, i think about my husband deploying and missing so much of the pregnancy and the first few months after... and then i wonder why we did this the way we did... I feel guilty that he won't be here to experience it all with me. But he always says it's worth it, it's all going to be worth it.

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