Late Term and Child Loss

Introduction

Hello all - I have been lurking for a few weeks and thought it was time to introduce myself.  We lost our baby three weeks ago on January 30th.  I was almost 22 weeks with a boy.  His name was Caleb.  We knew for a couple of weeks that things were not going well.  We were orginally pregnant with triplets from IVF.  We lost the identical twins early on, but the remaining singleton always looked great.  I had been spotting from about 12weeks on and we were being monitored weekly by a high risk dr.  When we went in at 19 weeks for our appointment, my fluid levels were low and the bleeding had gotten worse.  My membranes had ruptured at some point since the previous week, and they were now saying that I had a partial placental abruption.  The next couple weeks things just got worse and worse until he ended up with no fluid at all and the bleeding just kept getting worse.  It took us over 2 years to get pregnant - I always thought that once we did everything would be fine.  Everyone keeps saying the standard things; your young, you'll try again, next time it will be fine.  I know that is what you say - and before this  - I would be saying the same thing.  But now I feel different - I have hope for a future pregnancy, and hopfully a baby, but I can't help thinking that the fear of something going wrong will always outweigh the hope.  We have frozen embryos and are planning on doing a transfer hopefully in a couple months.  Thanks for listening - sorry if I rambled.  I've read some of the stories posted here over the last few weeks.  My heart goes out to everyone - it is so sad that we have to go through this loss.   
Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

Re: Introduction

  • I'm so sorry to hear the loss of your twins and sweet Caleb. Don't apologize for 'rambling.' You can be yourself here. The ladies here are wonderful and we all support each other.

    *hugs*

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  • I am so sorry for your loss of sweet Caleb, as well as his early wombmates.  Please feel free to post about anything you are feeling.  We are all here to support each other.
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    ***Congratulations to my TTCAL buddy Roxyttandme!! It's a GIRL!! Charlotte arrived on 9/29!!!!***
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  • I am so sorry for your loss. As far what people say OMG it drives me nuts I lost my 3 month old son to SIDS. I hear well atleast you have 2 other kids REALLY??????? I just want to smack people sometimes. or i also hear you can try again hmmmm nope sure cant had my tubes tied when i had my youngest so having another baby is going to be hard and the fact that I am scared i sure cant go through that again ever. sorry now I am rambling
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Jacob was 3 months old MOM to a SIDS ANGEL
  • I'm so sorry for your losses. I hope you find comfort with this group.
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  • I am so sorry for your losses. Big hugs. The ladies here are very supportive and offer a lot of comfort.
    TTC since November 2009. DH diagnosed with sperm antibodies. IUI #1 = BFN IUI #2 = BFN On the road to IVF.... Egg Retrieval Jan 21, 2011 16 eggs retrieved Egg transfer Jan 26, 2011 Only 2 viable eggs transferred. 1 IVF, 1 ICSI IVF #1 = BFP :-) 10/3/11 No heart beat at 38 weeks: Our baby Jack became an angel 12/14/11 = natural BFP Rainbow baby Samantha Jacklyn born8/8/12. Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • I am sorry for your losses . Hope you find comfort here.
    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Daisypath Anniversary tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • So sorry for your loss!  Hope you find comfort here. 
     Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

  • I am so sorry for the passing of Caleb and his siblings. I am sorry you have to be here, but I hope we can be a source of support and comfort for you. Welcome and (((hugs)))
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
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  • I'm sorry for your loss, we lost our twins on 2/6 at 22w, we did IVF, same as you. I didn't have any frozen embryos left though :-( so we have to do it again, hopefully this year. When are you planning on trying IVF again?
  • I am so sorry that you have to join us. I am also so sorry for the loss of Caleb and his twin siblings!! Hugs to you!! We are all here for you!!
    DS- Brenden born 11/13/93 Missed miscarriage on March 6, 2007 @ 9 weeks D&C on March 8th 2007. Riley Annalise born 2/25/08 ( 3 weeks early weighing 8 lbs 12.8 oz.) Chemical pregnancy 3/2010. Sydney Adriana born sleeping on 9/30/11 weighing 10lbs 3 oz at 38wks 4 days. Trinity Alivia born via c section at 36 wks 4 days weighing 9 lbs. 5.7 oz. She is our amazing rainbow baby!!! Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers PGAL buddy drvst8
  • Thank you so much for your warm welcome.  I'm glad to have a place where people understand what we've gone through.  I'm so sorry for all your losses as well.  To answer the above question on IVF - our dr recommended we wait 3 months.  So some time in April/May we'll start the RE appointments again; and hopefully transfer sometime in May/June.  We're going to play it by ear though to see how we're feeling emotionally when the time comes.   
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • I'm so sorry for your loss of Caleb and the twins.  This board is full of amazing women!
    TTC #1 since 4/09
    2/21/11: IVF #1 Begins and results in TWINS!
    11/4/11: The twins are born at 36w4d!
    11/5/11: We said goodbye to our sweet baby girl as she was born with multiple complications and a severe heart defect, Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome.
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  • Your loss/experience was almost identical to mine... (see my previous posts) my pregnancy to started as twins, we lost one at 9w5d and the singleton was doing well... My water suddenly ruptured at 18w.. We did ivf for two years.. The thought of possibly having to do it again makes me want to vomit....
    ~Heather~ TTC Since 12/2009
    Septated uterus, pcos (on metformin), MTHFR
    Clomid # 1- July 2010 = BFN / #2 Sept 2010= BFN
    IVF#1 - 1/2011 = BFN (Severe AF started 7dpo)
    IVF#2 - 3/2011 = Ectopic
    Aug 2011- FE - Thaw all - cancelled - embryos didn't make it!
    Oct 2011 - IVF#3 = BFP!! ~ TWINS!!
    Said goodbye to Twin B @ 9w5d
    Hudson Edward ~ Pprom 18 wks 2/16/12 - We love you forever. You have our hearts.
    8/15/12 5dFET = BFP! ~ Said goodbye at 7wks gestation
    11/9/12 5dFET = BFP! ~ Said goodbye at 5wks gestation
    12/28/12 - Septated Uterus Found (was misdiagnosed as bicornuate!)
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • I am so sorry for the loss of Caleb and his siblings. The ladies here have been so wonderful!
    Tim 12/30/00 Brad 4/30/02 Alex 9/29/03 Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • I am very sorry for your loss.  I lost twins at 18 weeks that were conceived via IVF.  It is daunting to be back at the starting point.  Your doctors can't just say, wait a few months and try again.

    It tooks us 11 months to be ready to start treatment cycles.  I know that is longer than some ladies need but give your body and heart time to heal.

    ((hugs))

    TTC since 07/2009
    Me: PCOS, Blood/Immune Issues DH: Low all 3
    Jun.- Sep. 2010 IUI#1-#3 = BFN
    Oct. 2010 = IVF #1 = B/G Twins (passed away Feb. 2011)
    May 2011 = Myomectomy and trans-abdominal cerclage (TAC)
    Sep. 2011 = Surprise BFP = C/P
    Feb. 2012 = sFET #1 = BFN
    Feb.2012 = Hail Mary IUI #4 = BFN
    April/May 2012 = FET #2 w/our last two embies = BFP (Please let this be it!)
    Beta #1 8dp5/6dt = 234 Beta #2 10dp5/6dt = 695 Beta #3 12dp5/6dt = 1796 Beta #4 17dp5/6dt = 17,888 U/S #1 May 17, 2012 = Twins
    Baby B's heart stop beating at 9 weeks 5 days
    Our little miracle baby is a boy. :)

    Baby Boy Owen and Baby Girl Avery were born too early on Feb. 13, 2011 due to a pedunculated fibroid, incompetent cervix and suspected placental abruption.
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    "What the heart has once owned and had, it shall never lose." - Henry Ward Beecher
    SAIF/PAIF Welcome
    Lots of love and luck to my PAIF/3T/IF Veteran ladies, especially my dear friend Zookie. Congrats to Papps, Teach84 and Starbuck on their little ones.
  • I am so sorry for your loss & people who havent lost a baby dont always know what to say & sometimes say the wrong things. You wont find that here & its bittersweet to welcome you here but there is lots of love & support from amazing woman who feel your pain. HUGS
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  • I am so sorry for your loss.  I hate that any of us has to be here, but I hope this board provides some comfort.
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  • I'm so sorry for the loss of your little Caleb and his siblings.  Rambling is welcome here.  Everyone is so supportive and friendly and understanding and I hope you are able to find some comfort here.  Much love and hugs to you and your family.
    BFP#1: EDD 10/11/11 Our sweet boy Robin was born 7 weeks a little early on 8/23/11 due to HELLP syndrome, unfortunately he was diagnosed with Trisomy13 and left us on 8/29/11. BFP#2: EDD 10/13/13
    thelossblog.blogspot.com
  • I'm so sorry for the loss of your twins and the loss of your precious Caleb.  I'm sorry you're joining us on this board, but welcome.
    Mom to Eliott Alexander, born sleeping at 37 weeks on 8/13/10. Most of us only dream of angels - I held one in my arms.
    BFP #2 - EDD 2/26/12 M/C 6/28/11 @ 5w2d
    BFP #3 - EDD 4/7/12 M/C 8/2/11 @ 4w2d
    Too beautiful for this earth
    BFP #4 - EDD 12/09/12, Lucille arrived 11/26/12
  • I am so very sorry for your loss. Your story sounds so much like what I just went through with my second. Don't ever feel had about rambling. This is what we are here for.

     Our baby boy,Logan, was born still at 19w3d on 7/1/2011
    Our 2nd baby boy, Mason, was born still at 20w3d on 1/31/2012

     After a much needed sanity break... we are praying for our rainbows

    ((BFP 7/29/13))  ((EDD 4/12/14))  It's BOY/GIRL twins!!!

  • It's hard to have hope when you have already experienced the "worst case scenario".

    Big hugs! We all know the pain you are now feeling. I hate to welcome you here but you are amongst friends. I'm so sorry for the loss of your sweet babies. 

    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • I am so sorry for the loss of Caleb and your twins.  While we all wish we did not have to be here, we are here for each other and for you too. 

    Hugs,

    Jenn

    PS - I would recommend just grieving these babies for now and try to put trying again on the back burner mentally....you can pick it up again when you feel a little less overwhelmed.  The beginning is really, really hard.   

    We are so thankful that our second daughter, Lillian Elizabeth "Lily", was born healthy and happy on February 11, 2013.  We love her to pieces.  

    We lost our first daughter, Hannah Grace on May 4, 2011.  She was buried on May 14 during a beautiful service at my home church. We are grateful that if she could not be here with us, that she is healed and whole with the Lord. We look forward to the day when we will get to meet her. We love her so much.


  • I am so sorry for your loss. Big, big hugs. 
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    IVF/ICSI #1 July/August 2011 BFP # 1 - B/G twins - preterm labor/cervical incompetency @ 23w3d FET # 1 March/April 2012 - BFN 5/1/12 FET # 2 July 2012 - BFN 7/24 FET # 3 BFP! EDD 5/15/13 Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Pregnancy Ticker
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