Postpartum Depression

Antepartum Depression... Somewhat long...

Morning ladies... I know this board is for PPD, but I thought I might have some insight with you all. It never really occurred to me that I could possible have antepartum depression until last night... All my hormones came crashing down on me, and I just felt so hopeless about everything. I am 28 weeks pg, and dont get me wrong... I LOVE IT! I am so happy/excited/thrilled that I am finally blessed with being able to bring a human being into this world that I can love, support and raise, it just seems like getting to that point is breaking me down.

I do have a history of mild depression that I was on medication for, but was eventually weaned off of by doctors. And obviously there are no medications that are "safe" during pregnancy, I just feel that I need something... so I figured coming to you ladies for some support would be a good starting point for me. 

So, last night sitting on the couch, all my emotions hit me for no reason that I can think of, and I broke out in tears. All I could think of was the same feelings I had a few years back before I was put on medication. I feel like a bad person (not toward LO, not toward H or really anyone else) just that I have been very quiet lately and have had no umph to want to do anything... My concentration is starting to drag and I just have no motivation to do anything.

I really want this to change, b/c I don't like how I feel, and I know my H doesn't like seeing me this way. I feel like I am failing at being a good wife... I don't show my H affection near as much as I used to, its not that I don't love him, or don't want to or anything... Its just that recently (really since I got pg) that I just don't want anything to do with affection. He comes up to me when I get home from work to give me a hug and a kiss, and I just get... almost like... weirded out? maybe and just squirm and shake him away from me. I hate doing it, it just seems like I don't want anything to do with it... like I get annoyed by him "getting in my face."

I don't want to continue dragging this on, just kind of wanted opinions and suggestions on what I can do (I know I should talk to my Doctor about this, but I don't have an appointment for 2 weeks,  and just thought I would get a head start jump in trying to get some insight and at least get it out there that I could really have this, and just talk to someone about it. 

Thanks so much for taking the time to read this... and like I said, any opinions or suggestions would be greatly appreciated...

You ladies are the best! 

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Re: Antepartum Depression... Somewhat long...

  • Welcome!

    I don't have any advice on Antepartum Depression, but I wanted to let you know I read this and am thinking about you.

    FYI: My pregnancy was miserable.  I was a terrible wife for 8 of the 9 months.

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  • imageksspiff:

    Welcome!

    I don't have any advice on Antepartum Depression, but I wanted to let you know I read this and am thinking about you.

    FYI: My pregnancy was miserable.  I was a terrible wife for 8 of the 9 months.

    Thank you!

    At the beginning it wasn't bad at all... but it seems like it just keeps progressively getting worse... Im scared because I still have almost 3 months left!!! 

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  • I don't know if you have seen me on the May boards, but I am also struggling with antepartum depression. If you would like to PM me at anytime, I would love to talk to you, maybe it would help if you know I am going through the same struggle with you. You aren't alone. And not feeling alone helps. Smile
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  • I started getting antepartum depression at about 25 weeks or so. It was so bad that my SO would have to wake me up in the middle of the night because I  would be crying (full tears and all) in my sleep. I talked to my OB and per her suggestion started going to group therapy sessions. They did help, so I would look into those. My LO will be a week old tomorrow and the hormones are starting to really get to me. But I would suggest trying to find some group to join to get those emotions out, even if you feel like they don't make since and you shouldn't be feeling that way (that's how I felt, and would beat myself up for feeling like that making it worse) and also journaling. Just get paper and write everything that is going on in your mind when you are feeling down, just getting it out helps! I will keep you in my thoughts, and I hope you start feeling better soon! >HUGS<
  • Thank you all so much! I should start looking into groups around my area... 
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