Should I have kept my big mouth closed? (NBR)

thetheisens · February 2012

One of my coworkers I work closely with is seperated and getting divorced from her husband. He was cheating on her and left her. They have 1 daughter togather and he has a son from a previous relationship that lived with them. When I got pregnant with my ds she was also ttc, but then her husband left her and thankfully she did not get pg. Her husband is a real pos. He makes excuses not to take his daughter when he's suppose to and goes out and parties with his new gf, but then still asks my co worker for money for food for thier daughter when he decides to actually take her. I found out from someone that the new gf is now pregnant and announced it on fb. I knew my co worker didn't know yet, but decided I shouldn't get into her personal business. She's a really sweet girl. She said her husband had actually called to see when he could pick his daughter up for the first time in months, but also asked for money again. I was afraid he would tell her daughter about her new baby sister or brother and my co worker would find out from her daughter about the pregnancy. At the end of our shift I told her about what I had heard. Now I feel terrible, she was obviously very upset. Should I have kept my mouth shut?

thetheisens · February 2012

wishful thinkin:
It's hard to tell from your post how close you are to her. If she is just a work friend then I wouldn't have said anything. If she was a close friend outside of work I would've mentioned it to her but I don't know if I would've done it at work. It's one of those situations where you would have to be in it to know exactly what you would do and when. I had a friend whose ex boyfriend (but they were still talking and he was telling her how he wanted to get back with her and all that BS) was dating this girl and messing around with my friend. When I found out I invited her to my house for drinks and then I put him on blast. Your coworkers ex sounds like a real POS!!

We are not close friends. We do talk alot at work about our personal lives with each other. I feel terrible. I think I should have kept it to myself. I regret it now. I felt like I was keeping something from her by not telling her. I bet I feel worse about her ex does about it.

Liz4444 · February 2012

It's really hard to say because it is out there on fb so she could see it. I probably wouldn't have given that you are not close outside of the office and people tend to shoot the messenger.

cantalopes24 · February 2012

I would have said something. Of course she's upset but it's better than getting blindsided later on.

thetheisens · February 2012

cantalopes24:
I would have said something. Of course she's upset but it's better than getting blindsided later on.

I thought that I would want to know before if I was her because the she could cry and be upset now before he told her, then when he told her she could be calm and say what she really wants to say. She didn't seem angry at me for telling her and said she was glad I told her. I still feel really, really bad about it though.

AngLK987 · February 2012

I would have told her too... but I have a huge problem with a) keeping my mouth shut and b) minding my own business.

pennysuedog · February 2012

I would feel bad about her situation but not for telling her. You did the right thing. You didn't want to tell her to cause drama but out of genuine concern and you did it at the end of your day in a non-flashy way. Now she has time to compose herself and to talk to her husband about how she wants this to be brought up to her daughter. Not everyone would have the guts to do tell. I know I would want to have been told though.

rockdragon · February 2012

I don't think it was wrong of you to tell her. The information is out there so she would have found out anyway. It sounds like you told her and were then there to give her a little support, which is more than she was likely to get by finding out somewhere else. I would rather be told by someone who is trying to be helpful then to just be blindsided by it on FB or be hurt again by the POS that can't keep it in his pants when he finally does get around to saying something.

AngLK987 · February 2012

danes22:
Mrs.AngelKing:
I would have told her too... but I have a huge problem with a) keeping my mouth shut and b) minding my own business.
Haha, at least you can admit it! OP, I think you probably did the right thing.

Yes, One of my favorite not keeping my mouth shut moments was telling a "frienemy" of mine that I went to college with the following several years ago before DH & I were married, and obviously before Layla)"

She met me at the fair and says "Oh I hear you're pregnant!"

I say "Actually, No, I'm waiting until we get married to have a baby!"

This was about a year after she claimed to be a prim, proper christian girl, and part of a friend of mine's church group, got KU on purpose with a specific guy on purpose because she wanted a Milano baby... and then subsequently dumped the guy and won't let him have contact with the baby... and she's a terrible mother to boot (She just so happens to be KU again with a married man's baby.) winner winner chicken dinner.

Liz4444 · February 2012

Mrs.AngelKing:
danes22:

Mrs.AngelKing:
I would have told her too... but I have a huge problem with a) keeping my mouth shut and b) minding my own business.

Haha, at least you can admit it! OP, I think you probably did the right thing.

Yes, One of my favorite not keeping my mouth shut moments was telling a "frienemy" of mine that I went to college with the following several years ago before DH & I were married, and obviously before Layla)"

She met me at the fair and says "Oh I hear you're pregnant!"

I say "Actually, No, I'm waiting until we get married to have a baby!"

This was about a year after she claimed to be a prim, proper christian girl, and part of a friend of mine's church group, got KU on purpose with a specific guy on purpose because she wanted a Milano baby... and then subsequently dumped the guy and won't let him have contact with the baby... and she's a terrible mother to boot (She just so happens to be KU again with a married man's baby.) winner winner chicken dinner.

She wanted her baby to be a Pepperidge Farm cookie?

thetheisens · February 2012

Liz4444:
Mrs.AngelKing:
danes22:

Mrs.AngelKing:
I would have told her too... but I have a huge problem with a) keeping my mouth shut and b) minding my own business.

Haha, at least you can admit it! OP, I think you probably did the right thing.

Yes, One of my favorite not keeping my mouth shut moments was telling a "frienemy" of mine that I went to college with the following several years ago before DH & I were married, and obviously before Layla)"

She met me at the fair and says "Oh I hear you're pregnant!"

I say "Actually, No, I'm waiting until we get married to have a baby!"

This was about a year after she claimed to be a prim, proper christian girl, and part of a friend of mine's church group, got KU on purpose with a specific guy on purpose because she wanted a Milano baby... and then subsequently dumped the guy and won't let him have contact with the baby... and she's a terrible mother to boot (She just so happens to be KU again with a married man's baby.) winner winner chicken dinner.

She wanted her baby to be a Pepperidge Farm cookie?

Ummm..who wouldn't? Those things are f-ing delicious!

pearblossom · February 2012

Mrs.AngelKing:
I would have told her too... but I have a huge problem with a) keeping my mouth shut and b) minding my own business.

Me too!

Want a personalized experience?

Should I have kept my big mouth closed? (NBR)

Re: Should I have kept my big mouth closed? (NBR)

Choose Another Board

Search Boards