baby#2 first baby shower

busy.be · February 2012

I didn't have a baby shower with my DD, so this would be my first shower ever. My friends are going to have one for me and want me to register but I'm very shy and I'm not want to ask for things so I'm having a hard time with the registry.

I never got big things for my DD like a pack n play or a swing or even a baby monitor that I can use with #2, we got the things we really needed (HD got laid off 2 months before DD was born) this time we are having a boy. What things would you register for?

Natalie3398 · February 2012

If I were you I would go all out and register as if it were #1. Go ahead and register for the play yard and the monitors and anything you want. If people buy them great if not it's ok too.

I think every mom deserves a shower. Especially if this is your 1st one ever. Go ahead don't be shy and anything you need just put it on the list.

mommabear17 · February 2012

Realistically, who do you expect to buy you a pack 'n play, swing or baby monitor? Most people do not spend that much on gifts for a second child. Additionally, many people do not believe it is appropriate to have showers for subsequent pregnancies, regardless of whether or not you had one for the first.

I would not register, and if I was going to have something (which I personally would decline), I would request that it be kept very small and casual.

dufferoo · February 2012

I wouldn't feel weird about having the shower at all, especially given the fact that you never even had one for baby #1! On the other hand, if you really are shy and don't want to ask for things, then don't register. Not that people would necessarily scoff if you did, but follow your gut abuot it feeling a little gimme-gimme, you know? If there are just a very few things that you really really want, you can always mention those things to your friends and they can pass the word on to anybody that asks.

busy.be · February 2012

mommabear17:

Realistically, who do you expect to buy you a pack 'n play, swing or baby monitor? Most people do not spend that much on gifts for a second child. Additionally, many people do not believe it is appropriate to have showers for subsequent pregnancies, regardless of whether or not you had one for the first.

I would not register, and if I was going to have something (which I personally would decline), I would request that it be kept very small and casual.

I don't expect anyone to buy me anything at all! I did tell them they don't have to have one for me and a nice way. I didn't get one with DD1 because I was away, i was in another state and they all miss out on my first pregnancy as I did with most of all them. We are all mom's now and I'm the first to have a 2nd baby, when I told they I was pregnant the first thing they said was "oh your having a shower this time"

I feel bad asking them not to have one for me as I know they wouldn't hear me anyway and have one. When they told me to register I told they I didn't really want to and they told me to get over it. They all know me very well and know I'm not about the gifts.

I don't know anything about at all, all I know is I'm having one.

AlabamaMamma224 · February 2012

While it's nice for your friends to want to throw you a shower, I think baby showers for 2nd 3rd kids ect. are tacky, whether you had one with your first or not. Your post comes off sounding like....'well, we couldn't afford all the neat stuff with baby #1, so now my friends want to give me stuff for this new kid'......and IMO, the sex of the kid makes no diff whatsoever.

It may not be the case, but that's how your post came off. I'm sorry, you were out of state and missed the opportunity for a shower with baby #1, I think the opportunity has been missed and you should let it go, or just ask to have a small lunch, or girls day out before the baby gets here, no gifts required. I certainly wouldn't register.

eav2c · February 2012

mommabear17:
Realistically, who do you expect to buy you a pack 'n play, swing or baby monitor? Most people do not spend that much on gifts for a second child. Additionally, many people do not believe it is appropriate to have showers for subsequent pregnancies, regardless of whether or not you had one for the first.
I would not register, and if I was going to have something (which I personally would decline), I would request that it be kept very small and casual.

Why should she not register? The completion coupon alone makes registering, regardless of if it's baby #1 or 2, worth it (especially if she needs big name items like a pack n play). Sure, she shouldn't expect gifts, but I think it would be foolish not to register with needing so many expensive things knowing she is missing out on a great coupon to supplement having to buy it... even if she makes the registry private.

mommabear17 · February 2012

eav2c:
Why should she not register? The completion coupon alone makes registering, regardless of if it's baby #1 or 2, worth it (especially if she needs big name items like a pack n play). Sure, she shouldn't expect gifts, but I think it would be foolish not to register with needing so many expensive things knowing she is missing out on a great coupon to supplement having to buy it... even if she makes the registry private.

She didn't mention registering for a coupon code or keeping it private. She's talking about registering for a shower for a second child. Hence my answer. If she just asked if it was tacky to register when you weren't having a shower because she wanted to keep track of things and get a coupon, then my response would've been different.

lauraluv7 · February 2012

totally register girl! As mentioned above there are perks for you! Tracking all your purchases and getting great coupons in mail are great, plus alot of people have been asking me where I am registered that can not make it to the shower. Alot of people buy gifts for mommies even thought they can make it to shower. Don't listen to anyone who tells you, your time is pass for a shower! I have friends who had showers for child #3 and 4. If your friends want to throw you a shower, why not! I hope you have a great time and DO NOT feel guilty about anything Smile

Good luck mama!

rparks8467 · February 2012

Register and have a good time!!! People here forget that a baby shower is a celebration of life!!! Not always about being gift grabby

LaurenCase89 · February 2012

You should register and enjoy! It's extremely nice of your friends to throw you a shower. If one of my friends had not gotten a shower for her first pregnancy I would help throw the shower! It is about celebrating! So have a good time!

mymitch · February 2012

eav2c:
mommabear17:
Realistically, who do you expect to buy you a pack 'n play, swing or baby monitor? Most people do not spend that much on gifts for a second child. Additionally, many people do not believe it is appropriate to have showers for subsequent pregnancies, regardless of whether or not you had one for the first.
I would not register, and if I was going to have something (which I personally would decline), I would request that it be kept very small and casual.
Why should she not register? The completion coupon alone makes registering, regardless of if it's baby #1 or 2, worth it (especially if she needs big name items like a pack n play). Sure, she shouldn't expect gifts, but I think it would be foolish not to register with needing so many expensive things knowing she is missing out on a great coupon to supplement having to buy it... even if she makes the registry private.

Aleja0918 · February 2012

rparks8467:
Register and have a good time!!! People here forget that a baby shower is a celebration of life!!! Not always about being gift grabby

A shower, by definition, is about the gifts. It's also to welcome the woman into motherhood. If you want to "celebrate life", have a meet the baby party where no gifts are expected.

FrecklesInside · February 2012

I really don't see the problem with having a shower for #2 if you never had one. Just because it is not proper? That is ridiculous. These are her friends and family - they want to shower her with gifts since they didn't have a chance for the first one. It is not tacky. It is beyond me why it is considered tacky for someone to offer to throw you a party for a second or third etc. child... people might need new things for the new baby and if family and friends WANT to do it, I don't see why not.

What a silly "law" to get all up in arms about.

OP, you should register. No worries. Enjoy your shower!!

rhubarb123 · February 2012

Do you understand what a baby shower is and what it is for? It is to welcome the woman into motherhood (for the first time). You are already a mother.

It is fine if your friends offer to host a shower for you but they should keep it small...like a sprinkle. You do not register for sprinkles although you can register for the completion coupon so you can purchase things you need that you didn't get at the sprinkle. You just don't put the registry info "out there".

You WILL have people/guests that don't think anyone should have showers for any pregnancy except the first. Obviously they would not literally say or do anything and most would come just because it is the "polite" thing to do. Course it is always possible none of your family or friends follow proper etiquette.

BTW...I know women who have 3-5 chidlren and NEVER had a shower. Imagine that! It is not a right of passage you know. lol

Samiantha101 · February 2012

Ignore some of the bossy hens that call this place home and register for what you want.

As for all the ladies who say that baby showers are for welcoming a woman into motherhood, well, thats just like your opinion.

Wikipedia and most everybody I know think of a baby shower to celebrate a baby's birth or pending birth by showering a mom with gifts.

mamigee98@yahoo.com · February 2012

You should register for anything you think you will need. From the basics like diapers and wipes to stroller and car seat. People will get what they want and what they can afford anyway. It's always good to put stuff on your registry you might buy later on too because most stores will give you 10% off whatever is left on your registry. You will get mostly clothes so no need to include any of that plus stores change their inventory almost weekly so clothes are hard to find on a registry.

mamigee98@yahoo.com · February 2012

and BTW, it's not wrong to register for a bay shower, that's what they are for....gift giving! and every pregnancy should have one. i never heard people say that baby showers are for first time moms until i got on these boards. i'm having my 4th child and family and friends are throwing me 2 showers. I registered for the basic stuff or whatever I didn't have. My youngest will be 4 when baby comes so I still had some stuff and my friends generously gave me a bunch of hand me downs. register and have fun at your shower!!!!

Liz4444 · February 2012

Natalie3398:

If I were you I would go all out and register as if it were #1. Go ahead and register for the play yard and the monitors and anything you want. If people buy them great if not it's ok too.

I think every mom deserves a shower. Especially if this is your 1st one ever. Go ahead don't be shy and anything you need just put it on the list.

Why does every mom deserve a shower? I really hate the sense of entitlement in the world today. Everyone who gets their driver's license deserves a Mercedes, it doesn't mean everyone gets one.

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