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Natural Birth
overtonhayes
member
The thing I don't understand...
overtonhayes
member
Ok ladies. First of all, I really, really don't mean to be disrespectful here. I wish that there was a 'general' labour/birth thread (how weird that there's one for natural birth and one for VBAC, but not just a general thread?), because I'm worried as it's posted here, this will come across as an attack on those who choose to 'go natural'. It's not an attack, at all. It's just a... discussion. If it comes across at all snarky or judgemental, please know that's not my intention.
Frankly, I don't get it. I don't understand why women would choose to go through labour with no pain medication, or in some cases, no medical intervention at all. I can understand that some people have had bad experiences with epidurals or pitocin, but I do not understand why they don't choose to use other forms of medical pain relief. Not wanting to be rude, but the majority of women use it, so there must be something to it; they can't all be bad experiences. A lot of the 'reasoning' (sorry, that word sounds so... "YOU NEED TO JUSTIFY YOURSELVES") comes from "well women have been doing this for thousands of years without pain relief, so it's not necessary". Well, they've been amputating legs and performing C-sections and repairing bullet wounds without anaesthetic for thousands of years, yet no one ever talks about 'alternative pain relief' if you need a leg amputated. No one expects you to go in for spinal surgery without medication.
And that's just the thing: it seems to be becoming almost an expectation now. I've been looking at a lot of natural birth blogs lately, mostly from the point of view of the OB but some from the point of view of the mother. Every blog I've read from the p.o.v of the OB has been extremely snotty. They really seem to take the attitude of "pain relief is bad, I can't believe that women actually still think it's necessary". One OB actually lamented that so many women "allow themselves to become slaves to the medical system". The blogs from the mothers weren't like that, but on several blogs, both from OBs and mothers, there were more than a few comments along the lines of "I definitely am going natural with this baby, I had an epidural with my first so I feel like I cheated".
That's disgusting! Every woman should feel free to give birth however she wants, and no one should make her feel like she 'cheated' because she used pain relief. Frankly, a woman who delivers a 7lb baby with pain medication doesn't necessarily have an easier labour than woman delivering a 10lb baby without any pain medication.
And the choice of name really, really bothers me. Every birth is natural. It is a natural thing that our bodies do, and it doesn't suddenly become some process that has nothing to do with you because you choose pain relief. I'm not knocking anyone who calls going medication-free a "natural birth", because at this point that's just the terminology and it's as simple as that, but I really wish there was a better term.
As for unassisted births... That terrifies me. I understand a home bith, and was actually considering one until I found out that you will not even have the choice to use pain medication because it can't be administered outside of a hospital. I get the concept of having your baby in your own home, instead of in a strange environment. But to go unassisted? What if something goes wrong? It doesn't bear thinking about.
As I say, ladies, I really don't want to be disrespectful, and I am DEFINITELY not trying to talk anyone out of their choices. I just want to understand. Going pain-relief-free is something a lot of women choose, so there's obviously something to it. But this is my first baby, I'm only 20 (will be 21 by my DD), and yet I feel pressured to refuse pain relief, even though that scares the crap out of me. I'm going to hold off on it as long as I can, but the past few nights I've been thinking: why? Why should I feel any shame just because I want an epidural as soon as the first contractions hit? And it occurred to me that, frankly, I'm afraid of being judged. I'm afraid that if I start begging for help as soon as it gets hard, someone will judge me, whether it's the nurses or the people I'm close enough to to reveal the gory details to or my own children, years down the line.
I don't know, I guess... Am I the only one that feels pressured by this?
I'm going to say it again because I can't say it enough, I'm REALLY sorry if I've just come across as some total a-hole who's trying to convince you all that you're doing the wrong thing.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: The thing I don't understand...
I think that if you've read a lot of natural birth blogs and have been researching then you would have come across lots of literature that would have explained to you why some women are choosing natural birth. Google "cascade of interventions" or "why have a natural childbirth" or watch "The Business of Being Born" or "Pregnant in America" on instant Netflix.
It's interesting that you're afraid of being judged, but this post comes off a bit judgmental. IMHO many more women feel pressured to take the drugs, not to go natural.
IMO, I agree with PP that you did horribly in not offending anybody. And yes, you probably are the only one that feels pressured by this (ok not the only one, but definitely the minority). Most people from what I've read on this board feel pressured from others to get pain meds because it is the norm to do so. WE are the ones that get judged for NOT getting pain meds.
But I will explain to you one of the things you pointed out. Yes, for years they have done amputations and c-sections and many other things pain-med free. But that is also not something your body is naturally supposed to go through, so the pain you are feeling essentially is a pain that your body is fighting with, a pain that shows that something is WRONG. The pain of labor/childbirth is a pain that your body is working with, and although its not comfortable or pleasurable for most people, its not a bad thing.
This is what I was thinking. How have you not come across any "real" reasons why women chose unmedicated births?
My first reason was logical. Medical intervention increases your risk of needing a c-section. I don't want a c-section. It's like a snowball effect sometimes: one thing leads to another, and the next thing you know, you're in the operating room. And ditto that for recovery. I'd rather just not kick the snowball down the hill, you know?
And more than that, I just wanted to experience it, wanted to see what I could do. It's an amazing experience. The hormones your body releases during and after childbirth make you feel like a super power.
But you shouldn't feel the need to justify what you want to anyone. If you want the epi, and you've researched the potential negative effects, then go for it. All decisions during labor and birth involve some form of risk/benefit analysis. You have to do and decide what's right for you. I've never heard of anyone feeling judged for the epi, though. Right now, it's definitely still a cultural norm. Is it possible you're overreacting?
ETA: I'll go on record as saying I'm not a huge proponent of UA birth, either. While it may be empowering, it doesn't seem prudent or wise to me to have no medical professionals there to look for red flags and warning signs, something midwives spend a lot of their training on.
ETA#2: I typically refer to my births as "med-free" or "med-free/intervention free." Most people I've come across IRL tend to correlate "natural birth" with "vaginal birth." I think it's because people don't want to say "vaginal."
It's just a label. Use it however you want.
Huge
I've always been certain about going med-free myself, but I can see why most women choose pain relief. Epidurals can be a great thing during labor - I personally think they are overused.
And don't forget, we've been taught to fear birth in our society, and most women aren't encouraged to attempt med-free birth. How a culture views something affects how imdividual people view it.
DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)
Honestly, I'm with the other posters...you shouldn't have posted this here because you basically are attacking us.
Pain medication doesn't work the exact same for everyone, so you can't make an assumption like that about it.
My body is narcotic naive so if you give me 1/2 a tablet of Tylenol 3...I'm asleep for 12 hours!
My body knows what to do and how to do it. It's how we were designed and it's how babies are designed to come into the world. You can sit and say it's barbaric to not have pain medication, but I think it's idiotic that you would try to tell us that we're wrong to refuse medications and such which can interfere with the hormones and neurotransmitters the body is already producing to help with labor and delivery which in turn can lead to a major surgery aka c-section.
You can go be happy in la la land when you deliver all doped up, but don't nail me to the cross because I want a dope free birth!
In what world are you living where you feel that people expect you to have a natural birth? I encourage you to run a little experiment and tell everyone who mentions your pregnancy that you're going to have a med-free birth. Let us know how that goes.
Personally, I went med-free for a lot of reasons. One of the big ones was that I just wanted to see if I could do it. And boy, did it make me feel like a badass. Sorry if you don't get it. Epidurals, narcotics, and c-sections are tools that have their place in childbirth and luckily I didn't need them. I don't get why so many women plan on meds without giving their bodies a chance. And I don't get why I should have to justify allowing a natural process to work itself out the way evolution designed.
You're scared of the pain and labor, I get that. Our culture has turned labor and delivery into something to be feared and make it seem like some horrifically painful event. So I understand your fears. -- I was terrified of it myself when I first got pregnant.
Then I educated myself. I read up on birthing methods (Bradley, hypnobirthing, etc) and all the various pain coping techniques. I read about all the different drugs and interventions and learned about all the harmful effects those can have on mother AND baby. And THAT sold me. I highly recommend Ina May's Guide to Childbirth. Start with the second half of the book and read about the birth process and how our body releases hormones and works with itself to HELP us cope with the pain. And read on about all the medical interventions and all the risks that they entail and how they interfere with what the body is doing.
That is why I chose to go med free and as intervention free as possible. Because the risks and harmful side effects of the drugs and interventions were not worth it. So I faced the pain and I conquered it. It wasn't that bad; I made it through. And I felt amazing afterward.
Regarding your comment on c-sections, bullet wounds, etc. Labor isn't a wound, it's not surgery. There is pain, but it is from your body stretching and working and doing what it is supposed to. Like when you run or work out, your muscles burn, but it's a good burn from your body working. Labor pains are part of the process of bringing your baby to you. When you relax and go with it instead of fighting it, the pain lessens.
Your next point, I think the snottiness is more because so many women go into labor completely uneducated regarding the drugs and interventions and just take whatever is offered to them rather than making an educated choice. And maybe you did read it somewhere, but I feel like you may have misread comments, because I've always seen that women "feel cheated" rather than feeling like they cheated. The feeling is usually more that they were pressured into drugs, maybe ended up with an unplanned c/s, and they feel cheated out of a more beautiful birth/happier birth/safer birth; rather than a feeling that "they cheated by taking drugs." I just wanted to note the general difference in sentiment from what you were seeing.
If that is what you saw, then I agree with you, that is disgusting. If someone needs pain relief and has made an educated choice, they shouldn't be made to feel bad because of that. They should be able to make the choices that are best for them and their baby, whether that is drugs or no drugs.
Regarding unassisted births - VERY few do that, and most that do, it is by accident. I think most of the women here, if not all, would tell you that having a qualified person to assist in your birth is very important to your safety and the baby's, whether it is a midwife or an OB. Having a natural birth does not mean going unassisted! I think it is very important to have someone there who understands the process and knows what to watch for in case something is going wrong.
I'm sorry that you feel pressured to go drug free. Read up on your options and make an informed choice that you feel is best for you and your baby. -- One thing to note though regarding your thought on getting an epi at the first contraction, a lot of doctors, or that's my impression from what I've read, will make you wait until a certain point to get an epi, because it can slow down your labor and cause you to stall if you get it too early and then you end up with a c/s for failure to progress. So that is one reason to wait to get an epidural. Also in my experience, most people look at me like I'm crazy when I say I didn't have any drugs. They expect that I did, so they are really surprised to learn I didn't and immediately inform me that they could never do that themselves. Which is sad, because they don't realize their own strength; they doubt themselves. I really believe they could if they prepared for it and tried, and it is an amazing feeling, completely worth it.
Best of luck to you. I hope you will do your research and go into labor knowing your options and at peace with whatever route you choose to go.
And no more worrying! Calm, happy thoughts. 
Ok, I'm going to attempt to not be offensive, but do you take medication when you dont need it?
I'm going to take a guess and go with no. So think of our experience with childbirth in a similar manner. We choose to forgo medication if we dont need it. And luckily for most of us, all the planning and researching and effort we put into pregnancy, labor and delivery means that we can have that. There are always situations where you still end up with medical interventions because labor and delivery in an unpredictable process. But at least I can say I tried.
For me, its not about not having medications/ interventions etc. Its the fact that there is someone putting a LARGE needle in my spine. If that person is having an off day, I could be the one in however many that end up paralyzed. Frankly, if I can do without that risk, no matter how small, I'm going to.
I'm sorry you're feeling pressured to go natural. Everyone should have the birth they want. But before you come here asking questions and making assumptions about natural birth, you should probably do some research. I have my reasons for wanting to go without medication, I shouldnt have to justify them to anyone.
Hope that wasnt disrespectful.
I had a medicated birth for my DD - and it caused me lots of problems, and I nearly had to get a c-section because my body was not allowed to do what it should have done on it's own - namely progress. I was uneducated, I didn't know how to stand up for myself. I was not against medication, but I didn't understand how it would make my labor more difficult.
This time, I've educated myself. I'm not opposed to medication - in some cases it's vital to both the mother and baby. Due to my own past experience, I know it's something I want to avoid. I've switched providers, I'm taking a class that I feel suits my needs and personality, and I feel I'm giving myself and my child the best chance possible for a happy, healthy delivery. And in the end, that's all any mother is after.
I also do not call it "natural birth." I call it "low to no intervention." That is what I'm looking for, and will call it as such - because that's what I feel comfortable with.
LOL I love that you think that women should not be judge for "giving birth however she wants," but then you spend paragraph after paragraph judging us for wanting a natural birth. Pot meet kettle???
It is perfectly obvious that you are not here to become more informed or understand why we are choosing the route, so why in the world would I want to waste my time trying to explain it to you?
GL with your birth...I hope it works out the way you want it to.
Because I care more about my baby's health and wellbeing than the fact that I have to go through some short lived pain. Because the pain doesn't scare me half as bad as all those drugs and medical interventions (that you think still make labor natural) . And for the same reason some people push their bodies to run marathons or be physically fit, I can, it makes me feel empowered and my body is absolutely amazing in that it was made to do this task.
If you want to get an epidural, get an epidural. But take responsibility for your decisions and stop acting like anyone else is trying to tell you what to do.
Each intervention carries risks. Each drug has side effects. Pitocin is a synthetic form of a hormone your body produces naturally, Oxytocin. Oxytocin is the hormone that makes you feel happy, loved, safe, protected, etc. It's also the hormone that makes you bond with your baby. Interfering with the production of this hormone by injecting a synthetic can harm the bonding process, cause or exaggerate the baby blues and PPD, and cause problems establishing a BFing relationship.
Narcotic pain relief (Stadol, etc) interferes with mom's ability to be totally present in the birth. I know, I had Stadol during my labor. I remember every moment of my 22-hour labor except the 2 hours I was on Stadol. I feel like I blacked out during that time. I don't like being out of control of myself, which is why I don't have more than 1-2 drinks at a time. I especially don't like not having control over myself when I'm around strangers whom I don't completely trust (doctors, nurses, interns, orderlies, janitors, etc. Think about the multitudes of people who come in and out of your hospital room).
All pain relief meds have the ability to make both mom and baby sluggish and sleepy after birth. The first couple of hours after birth, an unmedicated mom and baby are both on a "high" of sorts from all the Oxytocin and they are both generally calm and very alert. This time is great for getting BFing started while baby is awake and alert. You can absolutely BF successfully after a medicated labor (I had every drug in the book and DS has been EBF from day 1) but it does make it more difficult in a lot of cases.
Most of the reasons natural birth sounded like a better choice to me revolved around BFing. I think the benefits of EBF are well-known enough that I don't have to list them here to explain my choices.
On a personal note, I believe that birth is not a medical event. I believe that God designed the human body and that it's perfect in the way it functions. Birth, being a totally normal occurrence, not a life-threatening medical emergency, should be left alone. The way our bodies move and change during pregnancy and labor and the hormones that are produced from ovulation through delivery and BF are just amazing to me in how perfectly the whole process was designed. I was stunned when I really learned all the ins and outs. It's just beautiful and I see no reason to interfere with that unless my life or my child's is truly on the line.
If you want an epi, get an epi. NO ONE on this board is trying to stop you.
What a silly post and a silly attempt at not being offensive.
I chose a med-free birth because I realized that interventions (i.e. medicine) lead to more interventions and maybe a c-section. My MW told me that if I hadn't gone natural then I probably would have had a c-section since I was pushing for so long. So I'm content with my choice and felt like a rock star afterwards.
Off to the beach
DS 7/18/2010
Handy 2.0 Due Early August
2011/2012 Races
12/17/2011 Christmas Caper 10K
2/11/2012 Have a Heart 5K
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4/22/2012 10M Parkway Classic
10/28/2012 Marine Corps Marathon
What's with the wall of words? You don't "get it". Ok. Whatever.
Coming over her and posting your own fears over natural childbirth when you have no interest in natural childbirth is nothing short of inflammatory.
Personally, I don't feel that the OP was being offensive. She apologized in advance and had an honest question. There's just no way to bring up this subject (in either camp) without sounding offensive to somebody.
I've not given birth yet, but I plan to go natural and here's why (most of this is repeating what pp have already said):
- Birth is natural. We were meant to do it. All female animals are meant to do it in some form, otherwise we would not exist. Therefore, it is a process your body is adapted to do perfectly, except in rare cases when something goes wrong. I don't feel that a natural process, in a healthy state, should require pain medication.
- Getting a leg amputated or your spine operated on is not the same as birth. Those processes are not natural. The pain in those instances indicates that your body is hurt or damaged. Labor does not mean your body is damaged.
- Fear of childbirth is culturally set upon us. We see movies where women giving birth are screaming bloody murder, so how can we not think it is the most horribly painful thing ever? Yet there are some societies where birth is viewed as calm and peaceful, and guess what? The majoirty of those women feel very little pain. Pain is mental, and if we can get past that, then we don't need pain meds.
- Pain meds can lead to other, more dangerous interventions. If I can avoid that, I will.
I don't judge anyone for getting an epi if they've done their research and decide that is what is right for them and their situation. Unfortunately, most women who choose to go med-free get judged for being crazy, crusty hippies. It sucks to be judged either way.
4/25/12 ~ Our angel, Persephone James, is here!
Don't knock it 'til you've tried it. It's the most amazing and natural thing I've ever done and I'm so excited to be able to do it again.
And ditto what pretty much every other PP said. Educate yourself rather than reading blogs and posts so you understand the pros and cons instead of just opinions.
This! I am wanting to go natural, but I feel like everyone expects me to be unable to handle it. Thus it makes me feel like I HAVE to chose to use the epidural.
I wish I knew one of those OBs you are talking about! I have yet to meet one that pressures women to AVOID the drugs.
My reasoning is that after looking at how things like the epidural and cervidil and pitocin can increase your likelihood of a c-section, I would like to avoid them. I don't think it's true that between 1/3 and 1/2 of us really can't push out a baby. The c-section rates are pretty well correlated to use of those medications, as they both seem to increase together.
As far as the other drugs go, a lot of them are narcotics and can affect the baby, mother's ability to push, and other things. Some are not approved to be used in labor but are frequently used anyway, sometimes leading to serious problems. While the odds of it going horribly wrong in any given birth are not extremely high, I feel like if I can do it without those things, then why use them? I don't want to increase the risk to my baby, and if people want to call me a "mommy martyr" for it, well, I've been called worse.
A lot of people refer to water birth as "the aquadural." It offers some of the pain relief of an epidural and can reduce tearing. Considering all that, I wouldn't say my plan is to birth without any pain relief, just without pain-relieving drugs. The water sounds like an all-around better deal to me since recovering from a c-section is supposed to be just as much of an ordeal as labor, and statistically, choosing water over drugs DOES reduce the odds of a c-section. I see it as a trade off--a little more pain now, hopefully to spare myself some pain later.
I don't judge most women for getting the drugs since a lot of them honestly don't know the benefits of not using them or the drawbacks of taking them. Even educated moms get scared when a doctor or nurse plays the "dead baby card," and I am sure I could be easily pressured into accepting an intervention at a time like that. You can't blame a woman for doing what she thinks is best for her and her baby, even if it turns out (like it did with my sister in law) that the drugs send the baby to the NICU. I just feel bad for her that she was pressured into making a decision she could have avoided if the medical staff was up front with her rather than trying to get the baby out on a one size fits all timeline. Seeing births like this is actually the #1 reason I am opting for an "alternative" plan.
I do get irritated when there are women who DO know the risks and try to dig up any little scrap of information to make it sound like not using the drugs is dangerous to justify ragging on those of us who skip them. There are a lot of flawed studies out there that any junior high student can see were not conducted properly that will get cited as an excuse to take the drugs, and this is what bothers me. If you are looking for those studies, it is probably because you have read all the OTHER studies that show how the standard US model of care has been increasing, not decreasing, mortality rates for mothers and babies and are grasping at straws to refute that. Somebody saying, "Well, I have seen a dozen hospital studies that show how this drug can give my baby a seizure, but I choose to believe this one single study conducted by the drug manufacturer that says it can't" is something, I do admit, that makes me feel like my head is going to explode.
Also, FWIW, I would never plan an unassisted birth. If my husband was a doctor, I already had several children and felt like a pro and childbirth, and we lived down the street from a hospital, maybe. Maybe. But me, in my actual life, no. It isn't something I am comfortable with for myself, at all.
Ok, so I'll be in the minority here and say that your post didn't offend me. You sound curious and like you've done poor research, but I come across people like that all the time IRL when this topic comes up. And like PP mentioned, it's such a touchy subject that it's near impossible to bring it up with either side without "passing judgment".
Natural (ie. med free) birth, for me, is about a LOT more than just pain relief. If there was NO benefit to birthing without meds, and no drawbacks to getting an epidural, then YES, of course an epidural makes sense. Unfortunately that's not how it works.
1. I believe that my body, and it's natural functions, is a beautiful, awe inspiring thing. I have no reason to not trust that if my body can create beautiful humans, it can also birth them. I think birth is a beautiful and powerful thing that happens naturally, and I wanted to experience it as such. Birth is NOT (in the vast majority of cases) a medical emergency or problem that needs to be fixed.
2. I think that too many births end up in c-sections unnecessarily and I didn't want that to happen to me. North America has some of the very highest c-section rates in the world and I in no way believe that they're necessary that frequently. Other places in the world that have other models of care (ie. Midwifery) have much lower rates of c-section AND infant and mother mortality. That speaks volumes to me. And it's proven that even small interventions can cause of "snowball" effect that lead to more interventions and c-sections. C-sections are major abdominal surgery that can have long lasting effects, increase the risks associated with each subsequent pregnancy and birth, and limit the number of children you're "allowed" to have.
3. I just read a fascinating book that talks a lot about the hormones that our body uses and creates in pregnancy and childbirth. Did you know that the very pressure of your babys head on your vaginal opening at the point of delivery releases the largest rush of hormones your body will experience in labor, for the purposes of both increasing the mothers strength to get the baby out and for bonding mother and baby in those first few moments LO is out. This small, yet profound, coordination of baby and mothers body in labor is significantly numbed when pain meds are used. I am in such awe of our bodies and how perfectly intune they are with the labor process and with our LOs as we birth them, that I cant help but want to respect that process as its meant to be.
If you are really curious about natural birth, do some real reading and educating (not blogs), and have some faith in your body and it's amazing power. Yes, birth hurts, but it's a temporary, and functioning, pain that I will absolutely survive. The benefits of going med-free for both me and LO are far greater to me than some pain relief.
Meh, I didn't read all of the responses yet, but I really did not find the post offensive. I went through a phase before I was PG where I was wondering why the heck I would do that to myself when all the pain relief was available.
Then I got PG and let's see:
I'm not allowed to drink alcohol or caffeine, eat sushi or soft cheese, take ibuprofen, get my heart rate above 140. Basically I have to walk on egg shells for nine months,but then on LO's birth day I am allowed to drug myself with narcotics? It just seemed illogical to me, so I skipped it...until I needed my cesarean.
I think what is most important is that women are offered a truly informed choice on how to birth their babies. A choice that is not grounded in fear, but in fact. When we reach that goal, then people won't have your question. Good luck to you!
I'm only going to touch on a tiny part of your long post, because I frankly don't have the time to do a blow-by-blow right now, but I will make two points.
1) Every drug/intervention has potential side effects. IMO, if I can handle labor without said drug/intervention, why risk those side effects? Now, I know that epidurals are largely safe, and I understand why women choose to get them. It's really a cost/benefit analysis that is individual for each woman. Is the risk of side effects worth the benefit of pain relief? For many it is, for us it's not.
2) Playing on your quote above, getting an epidural (or narcotics) doesn't guarentee that your labor and birth will be easy. You seem to realize this. I had planned for an low-intervention birth, but due to medical complications, made decisions that were best for me and my baby and ended up with a high intervention birth. I did end up getting an epidural, and my birth was still painful and my recovery was even worse. The whole experience between my medical issue, medication I had to be on, the long stressful induction, being stuck in bed, having my birthplan shot down point by point, etc. was really awful. For my next PG, I want to avoid having the same birth experience. I believe that pursuing a low-intervention birth will give me the best shot at a more positive experience.
BFP#2: EDD 2/11/14, MMC confirmed 7/15/13 (growth stopped at 6 weeks), D&C @ 12 weeks 7/25/13
This is my opinion. I believe it's best for my baby and I to have a vaginal birth and give birth at home with a midwife. I had a scheduled csection with my first birth and I was surprised at how powerless and depressed it made me feel. Even though I had a healthy baby I couldn't connect with her because I felt cheated. My birth was not natural. It was unnecessary surgery.
I would love to have an unmedicated birth in the hospital, but I don't want to fight for not getting an epi or pitocin or whatever they are trying to talk me into. It really depends on the nurse and you could get one that mocks you and demeans your choices or one that supports you. I'm not willing to chance it.
In my circles and on most of the other boards people that want an unmedicated birth are viewed as stupid or hippies. I don't bash people for getting an epi or try to convince them that they should have an unmedicated birth, so I'm not sure why anyone cares why I want to have an unmedicated birth. I do think people that schedule their csections because they're OB scared them are most likely uneducated and naive, but I say that because that's where I was three years ago. I've done a TON of research since then and this is the right choice for me and my baby. If you want a parking lot epidural...whatever. It's your body and your baby.
Keegan Patrick - Bilateral Clubfeet found at Anatomy Scan.
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Wow.
Ok. Well, first of all, if you "don't understand" why someone would choose a natural birth, then it's probably not something that's for you. Everyone has different reasons for wanting to have a med-free birth, as you can see by all the PPs.
Having a baby is a natural, physiological process and I don't understand why some women don't want to feel that at all. When the process unfolds the way it is meant to, with no intervention, it is beautiful, feels empowering and the recovery is usually great. I just think if I went through a birth without feeling one contraction I would feel a little cheated.
I think people that choose a natural birth have a different connection to their bodies and a different mindset than those who choose differently. For some women, the birth process doesn't matter to them, for others it matters a great deal.
It matters a lot to me how my baby comes into this world.
I also agree with this sentiment.
It's fine if you want pain meds. You are with the majority of women in this country. I wish we could trade communities - since my community thinks I'm crazy for doing it med-free.
My body was made to grow, deliver, and feed a baby. It is a natural process. Sure, it will be painful in the moment, but even immediately after delivery, my only thought was "that wans't that bad."
My body, however, is not meant to have a needle shoved in its spine. It's not meant to pee into a bag. It's not meant to be confined to a bed. It's not meant to be so numb that it can't control its body parts. It's not meant to be so drugged up that I sleep through the most important moments of my life. And since you brought it up, my leg is not meant to be amputated. But if I did need my leg amputated, I would take drugs because 1. it is an unnatural pain for which my body has no coping mechanism, and 2. because it has no impact on any other living beings. Pregnancy and birth is about what is best for the baby, not what is convenient for the mother.
Oh, and I took less than 48 hours of pain meds after birth, and it was just ibuprofen. The mothers I know that had c/s spent weeks on much stronger pain meds, which keep you in a fog for days. They could barely walk up the stairs when they got home after their hospital stays, while I was at Target with my 2 day old buying baby boy clothes since we were team green. I do not wish to trade places with them.
ETA: My birth was in no way unassisted. I gave birth in a hospital with a nurse, OB, med student, and a pediatric nurse in attendance. Most women on this board intend on delivering in a hospital or birthing center, or have planned homebirths with midwives (and often doulas) present. Very few women have unassisted births.
Over the course of the last several years, I've removed the majority of medical interventions and medications from my family's life. It has made a world of difference in our health. It takes effort and vigilance and the ability to withstand constant judgement and teasing from friends and strangers alike who think we are crazy.
We eat organic, whole foods. We take natural herbal supplements and whole food vitamins to keep our immune system strong rather than rely on vaccinations, antibiotics or OTC cold symptom relief medications. We refuse the use of immune surpressing medications such as steroids. We use exercise and stretching to strengthen our bodies to alleviate pain rather than take pain pills. We prioritize the proper amount of sleep, exposure to sunlight, etc. We no longer consume alcohol or eat inflammatory foods like gluten and sugar. We receive manual therapies such as chiropractic care, massage, etc. to improve the functioning of our nervous system.
My husband and I agreed that we will absolutely use conventional medical interventions when it would be dangerous or life-threatening not to do so ... yet since we started down our path of "natural" health, we have never come to the point where we've even had to consider this option because we have been healthier, we get sick less often, and when we do get ill or find ourselves in pain - it is extremely mild and short-lived. We slowly eliminated the left over OTC conventional meds and pain relief from our home, and now our medicine cabinets have nothing but herbs in them.
I brought my son into this world utilizing these same health care concepts - no unnecessary medical interventions. He is now one year old and has been a happy, healthy, delightful child who has had two extremely short colds for a total of 4 sick days his entire life - both having occurred when staying at a relative's house, and as soon as we left the house, the symptoms cleared up.
We had a long, labor at home with a CNM. It was the most wonderful birth I could have possibly asked for, and we were fully recovered and out at a friend's birthday dinner (both baby and me) by the end of the week. This is why I have no interest in artificial pain relief during labor. It's unecessary, and frankly my 40 hour labor to birth an 8lb. 12 ounce baby was not even close to the most painful or most difficult thing I have ever endured -- those would be (respectively) falling off a cliff and shattering my ankle and climbing to the top of a 19,330 foot mountain over the course of 7 days.
I have to lol at the OP's comparison of birth to amputation of a leg. Jeezus. No wonder women are terrified of giving birth. Every birth is different, but if more people experienced and shared experiences like the one I had, and many women on this board had, there just wouldn't be this fear. It's really not a scary thing...it's such an awesome thing. I would do it again in a heartbeat.
Re: why I chose to prepare for an unmedicated birth - it was my goal, should I be fortunate enough to have zero medical reason necessitating otherwise, to avoid additional pain from needles, a catheter, a potentially tired baby, having to stay in bed for awhile, and increasing my risk of c-section, etc etc etc.
I would never judge you for your choice to have an epi. I absolutely hope you have the birth you want for yourself.
I have to chime in here and say I admire your dedication to natural remedies, etc. to your family. Combine that with the mountain climbing and you're freaking awesome!
However, I'm nowhere close to that - I take Tylenol, I have allergies and asthma and deal with those both with alternative and western medicine, my idea of fun is shopping and reading a book, and probably could exercise a lot more than I do (which is nothing, to be quite honest). That said, I still had a natural birth and plan to do another one! My sort-of-out-of-shape body is still made to give birth naturally.
All women (barring pregnancy complications, etc.) can try to give birth naturally, in my opinion. It is a really awesome thing.
Get used to it. Parenting comes with all sorts of judgement and it starts now!
I'm choosing to forgo pain meds because I believe that doing so maximizes my baby's chance for a healthy birth and good start to life outside the womb. No one argues that pain meds injected into the mother are beneficial for the baby, and the baby's welfare is my top priority. I want her to be able to breathe and eat and bond properly, not disadvantaged by the effects of powerful drugs not intended for her but necessarily pumped into her through the umbilical cord. I'm ok with experiencing intense pain for a few hours to spare her that. But I'll be delivering in a hospital with a NICU and every medical intervention possible because of the outside chance that my body will not be able to deliver the baby safely without them, or that the baby has some kind of disability, injury, or other problem that requires medical treatment rather than just medical oversight.
Good luck with your birth plan. You have 25 weeks to figure out what's best for you and your baby.
I was simply relay why *I* chose natural birth. For me it was an extension of a particular lifestyle that my husband and I have been transitioning into over the course of several years. I don't expect others to live this way (like I said, it's not easy) and I totally think many women who don't wish to live this way can still have med-free births.
And I totally took Tylenol (and other OTC pain meds in addition to herbal remedies) when I was hiking up Kilimanjaro -- that mountain hurt, ha!
It's obvious that you are scared of childbirth. That's ok, many (most?) women are. You don't have to be though. Stick around this board for a while and you will learn plenty from strong, fearless mamas. Or, you know, don't. Stay scared, get an epi as soon as you can, and be done. Like you said, most women and babies are fine with medications. Just consider the fact that there are no side effects to medications you don't take. Or another option is stick around, decide med-free isn't for you, and get the epidural. Whatever you want.
The main thing you need to understand about parenting though, and the sooner the better, is this: You will be judged. You will be judged for wanting to go natural or for wanting an epidural or for ending up with a c/s. You will be judged for breastfeeding or formula feeding, for nursing in public, for covering up, for sleep training or not, babywearing, strollers, cosleeping, using a crib, starting solids and on and on and on and on. And that barely encompasses the first 6 months. See what I mean? You cannot let your parenting decisions be based on fear, and especially not fear of judgement. Make your decisions and own them.I did it for the medal.
We try not to tell everyone about them, because they're so awesome the epi moms get jealous.
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I am always happy to hear when women have the birth experience that they want- whatever that may be. For me personally I read a lot about the birth process and starting to think 'maybe I should try going natural'. I then found a midwife-only birth center near me and when reading a birth story on their website I though 'That's the birth I want'. I ended up being very lucky to have the birth I envisioned (labored in a birthing pool and then came out to do the pushing- once DS was born I was able to just snuggle with him for ages and then my DH held him for a long time and we only gave him to the midwife when we finally ate dinner!), it was an incredible and empowering experience and it all felt very natural. After the birth the midwives left us alone as a family, there was a double bed in the room and we spent ages tucked up in there admiring our new arrival.
They often say that having an epidural can lead to a chain of interventions that has been the case with so many of my friends. That said every pregnancy is different. I have a friend who went natural with her first and found it easy peasy but with her second she was crying out for an epidural and was only 2 cms (she said the pain was completely different).
It's funny how the going pain med-free almost becomes like a competition. I almost felt weird telling friends I went med-free, as if I was 'showing off' or being smug. Again the main thing is to do what you are comfortable with, the birth is only one day out of a lifelong journey.