Highly irritated with my OB....ventish and long

allisonmarie22 · January 2012

I saw my OB today for the first time in 5 weeks. According to my scale at home I have gained 14 pounds. I gained 8 of those pounds in the last 5 weeks. I'm trying to go by Dr. Luke's recommendations, so according to her I'm right on track.

The problem is that my doctor is totally NOT on board with Dr. Luke. He told me that I had gained too much weight and that I needed to focus less on eating and more on drinking. Fine. I know I'm not drinking enough. So, I asked him, how much weight should I gain? His response to me....NONE.

What?!

OK, I know that I started this pregnancy out overweight (175 pounds at 5'3") but seriously....does this man honestly think I should not gain any more weight at all? How is that even possible? He told me something to the effect that I should look at my pregnancy as an opportunity to lose some weight.

Again...WHAT?!

He said that we'll be monitoring my twins growth every 2 weeks until 3rd trimester and every 1 week after that and we'll know if they're not gaining weight properly. Right now they're measuring slightly ahead of where they should be weight wise and I feel like we've made excellent progress. If I stop eating the way I have been then what's to say their growth won't slow down and we'll end up having to try and regain ground we've lost when it's possibly too late? I'm not willing to risk having sickly, tiny babies just so I can lose a few pounds!

I do love my doctor and up until today I would've fought to the death in defense of him, but now...I'm just stupefied.

kaitley44 · January 2012

If you are unhappy with your OB than I would switch.

I switched OBs at 30 weeks because I was unhappy with the care I was receiving. There is no harm in finding a new OB.

Jen0204 · January 2012

I was overweight pre-pregnancy (size 16) and have gained 17 pounds as of today. Personally I feel that since I was overweight to begin with there was/is no reason for me to gain the amount of weight that Dr. Luke says. However, my OB told me that she would be comfortable with me gaining 45-50 pounds. I definitely think your doctor is nuts to view pregnancy as an opportunity to lose weight, especially if you don't have GD or any reason to have a specialized diet. If your doctor is that extreme then I'd really look into a new one. At the very least he should be trying to get you to consider a happy medium between no weight gain and Dr. Luke's recommendations.

frogchic295 · January 2012

I could not gain with my guys despite eating pretty much whatever whenever...I was diagnosed GD at 17 weeks so that limited me a bit. I started pregnancy at 5 feet tall 215 lbs and delivered at 31 weeks due IUGR from poor umbilical artery blood flow and very low fluid in baby a's sac. Just before delivery and after 7 days of being pumped with IV fluids I weighed 231 so just 16lbs up. Now 4 weeks post delivery i am down at least 25lbs which is great! However, I totally blame the problems with baby a and his IUGR to the fact that I didn't gain enough weight to fatten him up before 30 weeks. We were in the 90th percentile for the first 20 weeks but at week 25 baby a started to drop percentile points rapidly. Good luck, I believe that Dr. Luke's book helps ensure a longer pregnancy

Mrs. Alice · January 2012

uhhh??? That's just messed up. I would seriously question that. Does this Dr. have much experience with multiple pregnancies?

allisonmarie22 · January 2012

Mrs. Alice:
uhhh??? That's just messed up. I would seriously question that. Does this Dr. have much experience with multiple pregnancies?

That's the thing...he DOES!! He came highly recommended to me years ago by several midwives and doulas in the area, and even when I found out I was expecting multiples and inquired with the MoM's club in my area they still highly recommended him.

I'm just confused at this point and I don't feel like I truly know what's best for my babies.

JenLC99 · January 2012

I started out this pregnancy somewhat overweight, 225 lbs at 6'1". I am almost 17 weeks and have gained nearly 15 lbs. I feel like that is too much but my MFM has not said anything. I don't think I need to gain as much as Dr. Luke recommends but I am afraid that I might if I am not careful. I am trying to cut out as much sugar as possible and all beverages but water. I think your OB is nuts to tell you that pregnancy is a time to lose weight.

DoraBride07 · January 2012

Do you see a MFM at all? If so, have they talked to you about weight gain goals?

It would seriously make me question my doctor if they were so anti-weight gain, especially in a multiple pregnancy. I think Dr. Luke's book is a little aggressive with weight gain, but none?! I might consider trying to interview and find another OB.

google123 · January 2012

Are you following Dr.Luke according to 'overweight' women? Cause I think she breaks it down to how much overweight you are...and then how much you should gain.

I forgot what her total expected weight gain was, but it's a lot, I know lots of women who didn't gain as much as she said and still carried their babies to term with good birth weights.

I did gain tons of weight, my body can easily gain weight, and I can say that I do regret going overboard, because it's hard to take it off.

masked_rose86 · January 2012

I would definitely question your OB.

If you can see an MFM in addition to your OB that would be ideal.....or switch to a new OB entirely.

I didn't start this pregnancy overweight, but was careful about what I ate in the beginning since my OB wasn't all that worried about weight gain (she told me to expect 35-45 lb). I didn't start gaining weight until about 16 weeks since I lost weight initially due to morning sickness. My OB was incredibly laid back and unconcerned about it. It wasn't until I hit 27 weeks that I went in for my monthly ultrasound, and my MFM noticed that one of the girls was in the 10th percentile and asked how my weight gain was going. I had only gained about 13-15lb at that point and he was concerned.....and ever since it has been a game of trying to play "catch up". Today was what will be my last ultrasound since Baby A is now below 10th percentile and he wants them delivered by week 37 (instead of waiting till week 38).

I was and still am a little upset by how laid back my OB was about weight gain....I think if I'd been able to gain a little more up front that this might have helped. Not everything is within our control though. I worked 11 hour shifts on my feet until 27 weeks which may have played a significant role in the growth too (using up extra calories/restricting blood flow etc). I do think it was good I stopped work when I did. If I had a less strenuous job, maybe it would have helped in the beginning too.

I do agree that telling you pregnancy is an opportunity to lose weight is HIGHLY suspect.

allisonmarie22 · January 2012

google123:
Are you following Dr.Luke according to 'overweight' women? Cause I think she breaks it down to how much overweight you are...and then how much you should gain.

I forgot what her total expected weight gain was, but it's a lot, I know lots of women who didn't gain as much as she said and still carried their babies to term with good birth weights.

I did gain tons of weight, my body can easily gain weight, and I can say that I do regret going overboard, because it's hard to take it off.

Yes. I even paid the $50 on her website for the personalized profile, so I would know exactly what her recommendations were for my special case (I've also had gastric bypass surgery).

I am seeing an MFM, but when I tried to ask him questions today he told me that my OB had instructed them to do ultrasounds only and not handle any of my medical management, so he really didn't want to answer my questions. I was so stunned at the time that I didn't push the issue, but next time I see them (in 4 weeks) I plan to bring this up with them and tell them that I don't care what my OB says, I'm the one paying them and I'm the patient. If they won't answer my questions then I'll find someone who will.

Overall my appointments today were good. We got all good news about the babies and they look perfect, but my doctors' behavior (MFM and OB) was confounding all around.

violaplayer · January 2012

Uhm..... You're OB is full of it. Sorry but that's how I feel. I was a ginormous fatty when I got pregnant (5'9" and 260) My OB and the peri still wanted me to gain 35 pounds. (With my GD) I gained 48 total (a lot of bloat at the end though). I'm now down 50 pounds from my pre-pregnancy weight.

Did you have a RNY? With the malabsorptive component, you especially have to be careful with eating and weight gain. I'm surprised they haven't sent you to a nutritionist.

cookiemonster03 · January 2012

allisonmarie22:
google123:
Are you following Dr.Luke according to 'overweight' women? Cause I think she breaks it down to how much overweight you are...and then how much you should gain.

I forgot what her total expected weight gain was, but it's a lot, I know lots of women who didn't gain as much as she said and still carried their babies to term with good birth weights.

I did gain tons of weight, my body can easily gain weight, and I can say that I do regret going overboard, because it's hard to take it off.
Yes. I even paid the $50 on her website for the personalized profile, so I would know exactly what her recommendations were for my special case (I've also had gastric bypass surgery).
I am seeing an MFM, but when I tried to ask him questions today he told me that my OB had instructed them to do ultrasounds only and not handle any of my medical management, so he really didn't want to answer my questions. I was so stunned at the time that I didn't push the issue, but next time I see them (in 4 weeks) I plan to bring this up with them and tell them that I don't care what my OB says, I'm the one paying them and I'm the patient. If they won't answer my questions then I'll find someone who will.
Overall my appointments today were good. We got all good news about the babies and they look perfect, but my doctors' behavior (MFM and OB) was confounding all around.

Your MFM, a Specialist in high risk, was told not to do medical stuff and only ultrasounds?? I am so uncomfortable. You need a new ob.

allisonmarie22 · January 2012

ViolaPlayer:
Uhm..... You're OB is full of it. Sorry but that's how I feel. I was a ginormous fatty when I got pregnant (5'9" and 260) My OB and the peri still wanted me to gain 35 pounds. (With my GD) I gained 48 total (a lot of bloat at the end though). I'm now down 50 pounds from my pre-pregnancy weight.
Did you have a RNY? With the malabsorptive component, you especially have to be careful with eating and weight gain. I'm surprised they haven't sent you to a nutritionist.

I did have the RNY. I also felt that I should see a nutritionist, but no one else seems to share my opinion. I just don't know. I feel at this point like I'm being mishandled, but I don't want to overreact and do something rash. I've been with my OB for 14 years and I've never questioned his competence until I got pregnant with twins.

allisonmarie22 · January 2012

cookiemonster03:
allisonmarie22:
google123:
Are you following Dr.Luke according to 'overweight' women? Cause I think she breaks it down to how much overweight you are...and then how much you should gain.

I forgot what her total expected weight gain was, but it's a lot, I know lots of women who didn't gain as much as she said and still carried their babies to term with good birth weights.

I did gain tons of weight, my body can easily gain weight, and I can say that I do regret going overboard, because it's hard to take it off.
Yes. I even paid the $50 on her website for the personalized profile, so I would know exactly what her recommendations were for my special case (I've also had gastric bypass surgery).
I am seeing an MFM, but when I tried to ask him questions today he told me that my OB had instructed them to do ultrasounds only and not handle any of my medical management, so he really didn't want to answer my questions. I was so stunned at the time that I didn't push the issue, but next time I see them (in 4 weeks) I plan to bring this up with them and tell them that I don't care what my OB says, I'm the one paying them and I'm the patient. If they won't answer my questions then I'll find someone who will.
Overall my appointments today were good. We got all good news about the babies and they look perfect, but my doctors' behavior (MFM and OB) was confounding all around.
Your MFM, a Specialist in high risk, was told not to do medical stuff and only ultrasounds?? I am so uncomfortable. You need a new ob.

Yes! It appears that is the case. Uuuuuuugggggghhhhh...I never thought I would be thinking about finding a new OB in the middle of my pregnancy!

JosiePosy · January 2012

You need a new OB. Now is not the time to be uncomfortable with your doctor(s). FWIW I was a size 12/14 when I got pregnant at 5'3" and I gained 40 lbs by the time I delivered at 29 weeks.

Fancy3Face · January 2012

I was overweight when I got pg and while my doc never said anything about weight gain, my RE mentioned that they wouldn't want to see me gain more than 20-25lbs. I balked too. I ended up losing in my first gaining a lot in my second tri and losing again in my third tri due to m/s and GD. I gained 25lbs total. I lost all that and then some in the week after they were born.

I definitely wouldn't lose on purpose. I lost in my first and third tri's and my OB's freaked out. I'd just eat healthy (good fats), get the recommended types of foods (proteins), enough water and not worry about the #'s on the scale. You don't need anymore stress. You're doing fabulous!

allisonmarie22 · January 2012

Thank you all so much for your feedback. I've got some serious thinking to do.

It's so nice to have a group of people to come to that know where I'm coming from and understand what it's like to be carrying multiples! Most people just don't get it!

Jen0204 · January 2012

I wonder if your MFM would be able to give you a recommendation for another OB. That's insane that they're not allowed to give you medical advice. The only reason I can think of that your OB would have said that is if your MFM was giving out advice that they didn't like. My OB and MFM work closely together, but my OB defers to my MFM on all decisions regarding the babies and when/how to deliver. I'm surprised that the MFM would agree to work with a practice who asks them not to give out medical advice. Their job is to monitor the babies, if all they're doing for you are ultrasounds I'm sure you could get those done somewhere other then a specialist's office.

hunt2005 · January 2012

allisonmarie22:

Mrs. Alice:
uhhh??? That's just messed up. I would seriously question that. Does this Dr. have much experience with multiple pregnancies?

That's the thing...he DOES!! He came highly recommended to me years ago by several midwives and doulas in the area, and even when I found out I was expecting multiples and inquired with the MoM's club in my area they still highly recommended him.

I'm just confused at this point and I don't feel like I truly know what's best for my babies.

hunt2005 · January 2012

allisonmarie22:

Mrs. Alice:
uhhh??? That's just messed up. I would seriously question that. Does this Dr. have much experience with multiple pregnancies?

That's the thing...he DOES!! He came highly recommended to me years ago by several midwives and doulas in the area, and even when I found out I was expecting multiples and inquired with the MoM's club in my area they still highly recommended him.

I'm just confused at this point and I don't feel like I truly know what's best for my babies.

Even for someone overweight and pregnant with one child they normally recommend at least 10-15 pounds of weight gain. Yes, that person may be overweight, but the baby still needs to grow and if you don't gain any weight then it's pretty much dieting which can limit the calories that the baby is getting and hinder it's growth. Now multiply that by TWO babies, and yeah. Find a new doc. Sorry you're going through this.

mmbench · January 2012

I was 5'8" and 175 when I got pg.

The first time I saw my OB at 12w I was 183. She instructed me NOT to gain any more weight. The next 8 weeks were the hardest of my life because I practically was dieting to not gain any weight (we did not know it was twins).

We found out it was twins at 20w, and my OB dropped me at 24w (with a referral to a MFM/high risk practice due to TTTS). One of my babies was MUCH smaller than the other, and he put me on a high protein diet in addition to bedrest. He honestly said he didn't care what I gained at that point as we needed to make sure the smaller baby was able to get whatever she could get out of me.

I ended up gaining 75 lbs before having the girls at 34w. Lily was still only 2lbs 13 oz, and Madeleine was 4lbs 9 oz. I honestly feel that if I hadn't been so hung up on gaining in the beginning, she would have had a better shot at being larger at birth.

3 months PP I was 210 and have been stuck there (plus or minus 5 lbs) ever since. It's not the end of the world.

snoangel79 · January 2012

Definitely switch your OB, that doesn't sound right to me! I've gained 26lbs and my babies are still on the smaller side though. I work in L&D (off work as of 23 weeks) before I left a woman was having her twins at 38 weeks and they were estimated 6 and 7lbs a piece, I looked at her weight gain and she had gained only 35 lbs!! So it seems the Dr. Luke book is not always right with a ton of weight gain. I'm following my high risk doc who said 37-50 (which sounds very reasonable, I'm normally 140 5'6").

kiwi443 · January 2012

I would encourage you to switch if you're uncomfortable. I switched at 20 weeks, after finding out I was carrying twins. My original OB felt that my pregnancy was not high-risk, despite the fact that ultrasound tech saw only 1 placenta and couldn't confirm whether there were 1 or 2 sacs. Changing practices made me so much more comfortable. GL with your decision.

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