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Babies: 3 - 6 Months
IlliniQT
member
At what age did you start any form of CIO?
IlliniQT
member
Our pedi said our LO should be working on self soothing, and to let him cry for about 5 minutes then go in, reassure him, and then start the 5 minutes again. Well we are doing something wrong or our pedi is a moron. We're on day 5 of trying that, and everytime we end up spending an hour or more trying to get him to sleep. We eventually hit a point where we just shhhh and pat him to sleep in his crib -- so he's not falling asleep, we're again "putting" him to sleep.
What are you all doing? Because I can't take another evening like this. It's stressful and causes a lot of mommy anxiety...
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Re: At what age did you start any form of CIO?
At this age you should be working more towards drowsy but awake. I'd work on putting him down and patting him until he falls asleep in the crib or close to it. Babies at this age need help falling asleep and that's why they cry. When your baby is a little older they'll cry because they're ticked off because they don't want to go to sleep. That's when I think CIO is more appropriate.
On this one trust your mommy instinct and not the pedi.
Thanks for the thoughts ladies -- we had been doing pretty good with drowsy but awake until the 4MW reared it's ugly head...now his cute little babies eyes pop open the second he's headed for the crib and the all out antics begin. Maybe we'll just wait until he seems a little more ready and tell the pedi to stick it where the sun don't *** lol
I am sure she had good intentions...LO still wakes up pretty often at night to eat, it's the only thing that will get him back to sleep. About 50% of the time, we still wrestle with the 45 minute instruder. I thought it was a boob association, so I sent DH in last night when LO woke up after 3 hours of sleeping. After 10 minutes of rocking, he was still screaming so I made DH a bottle for LO and he sucked it down like there was no tomorrow.
I gave in again tonight, and just nursed him to sleep, at least it's peaceful for now :c)
We still rock Gabe to sleep. He fights sleep more than any baby I've ever seen in.my.life!
There is no way he'll sleep otherwise. We just go with it. He won't need to be rocked to sleep forever, and we actually like the snuggle time.
We'll miss you sweet Debbie Girl (4.21.12) and sweet Cindy Girl (8.9.12)
We just started last week, and LO is just shy of 6 months old. I NEVER would have been able to do it prior to now. And, it's definitely working. The first night was tough, 46 minutes of crying (and Mommy and Daddy rocking back and forth like Rain Man!), but last night was the 4th night and it took 10 minutes at most for him to fall asleep. We've also been extremely consistent with the bedtime routine (bath, story, bottle, bed) which has been helpful.
Trust your gut! It sounds like he's not ready. No sense forcing something that doesn't feel right to you (and clearly isn't working right now). FWIW, our pedi said the same thing around the same age, and I basically just said I'd get around to it....
I'm with Katie. There is no harm in rocking a baby to sleep. I can get my LO to sleep in five minutes flat with a bottle and a rock so I see no point in trying the hundred other things I'm supposed to be doing. Also, don't we all love to snuggle before bed?
Drowsy but awake doesn't work at all around here either. I wait until the kid is good and tired and starts fussing for a bottle.
It works for us and I have a pretty good sleeper. She wakes up a few times a week for a bottle in the night, but the kid is hungry. Again I refuse to fight this. A bottle gets her to bed in 5 minutes rather than an hour of struggling. I know babies are supposed to self soothe but I think it's a skill they learn on their own in time and whatever we do doesn't necessarily encourage it along.
I'm going to be honest too. You have a ton of sleep issues and I know that sucks. However, put the books away, quit googling, stop listening to the pedi and don't believe everything you read on the Bump about what you're supposed to be doing. I don't want to come off as snarky with that, but just trust your instinct and go with it. You stressing out about what you "should" be doing is just going to make it worse.
this exactly. There are nights where he is up a bunch of times and needs to be put back to sleep, but I figure it wont last forever...and he won't go to sleep any other way.
Not snarky at all -- sometimes you just need some good ole fashioned honest advice, that people in your group of friends won't give -- the bump is perfect for that. Thank you!!
You need to do what feels right for your family. You and your DH should research options if needed.
Abby is almost 7 months old and while she can put herself to sleep drowsy, we prefer a bottle and cuddles before bed. I also cuddle her to sleep for naps on the weekends. She is a great sleeper and sleeps almost 9 to 10 hours at night. She is fussy a few times at night, but most of the time puts herself back to sleep. If she doesn't, I have to go in and check to make sure she is ok. Most of the time she can't find her pacifier.
I am a working mom and am gone for 11 hours a day. I am lucky if I see her for more than an hour awake M-F. I do what I feel is best for me, DH and Abby. She is happy, well adjusted and hitting all her milestones with ease. I know she will not always be a baby. We will work on sleep training if needed after she is a year old and more "stabilized" with her growth and development.
My Birth Story
I think 4 months is way too young, but again, do what's right for you.
We just started (LO is 5 1/2 months). I finally felt he was ready so I trusted my instincts (and I was right). I figured he was crying / screaming for a long time anyways while we were rocking / shaking him every night to calm down and sleep so might as well let him do it on his own (with Ferber's help). Some nights it would take over an hour to get him asleep and the first night with Ferber he cried for 30 minutes and slept 10 hours straight. By night 3, no fussing and 12 hours straight. It's like we have a new baby.
IMO 4 months is a little young and you should read Ferber's (or equivalent) book beforehand.
Around two months. It was the only thing that worked for our LO. Her 2 month shots were awful because we had to wait an hour for the pedi and she would not fall asleep out of her bed, so she was up for more than 3 hours by the time we got her home and the next 24 hours were hell. I finally called the pedi after 24 hours of not sleeping longer than a 3 hour stretch (and that was at night), and they told me to let her cry for up to 20 minutes!
She stopped after 5. Now we know that when she's really overtired, nothing calms her down except her own little self, but only after we leave the room.
DS is 5 months, and last week, decied he didn't want us to rock him to sleep. He will rock to very drowsy, but then starts playing and fighting sleep. We put him in his crib and pat his back (he's a tummy sleeper). DH and I have agreed that when he can get his pacifier in his mouth himself, we will talk about it -- not necessarily DO it, but think about it! He also still eats once a night, but he goes to bed at 7:00 (his bedtime, not our's!), so he does still need to eat.
Like everyone else said, you need to do what's best for your LO and for you. Ped's have their own timelines that the "experts" say is the best time for certain things... Do what works for you!
Picture courtesy of Heidi Keene Photography
We tried sleep training at about 4 months- non CIO methods, we don't think CIO is appropriate. Nothing worked. Like it would take over 2 hours to get her to sleep for 20 minutes and we had two weeks straight of that (everyone kept saying to just keep going and it would get better). We gave up and just embraced what works for us (nursing to sleep, cosleeping, napping/sleeping in swing, pretty much every bad habit there is) because we decided that she was clearly just not ready and it was just causing us unnecessary stress and sleep deprivation..
We'll try again after the holidays. We are traveling for two weeks so we are very curious as to what's going to happen and if she'll be more open to sleeping in her PnP when we aren't in our house.