is IF a "white" thing? (stupid question)

blonddnyc · November 2011

so I was watching "The great sperm race" on youtube which someone on here reccomended and it is truly awesome, but i noticed in the comments section on one of the videos someone wrote something that got me thinking...

they said something about infertility, or trouble TTC is mostly a "white" thing. and that you rarely see mexican, spanish or black people with trouble ttc or IF.

now i dont mean this to come off as racist in any way whatsoever.. just stating an observation... it does seem that many mexican/spanish women have lots of children, and i dont know if that because they are more fertile, it just comes naturally, or if they dont practice birth control... one of my BF's is cuban and she got KU 2 times in a row like it was nothing.... so is there any truth at all to that?

then i thought... are most of us on here white?

sorry if this is a dumb question and i really dont mean to offend anyone, im just truly curious after reading that comment.

sweetgotham · November 2011

Jessiree · November 2011

I just read an article on the Huffington Post in which Resolve stated that African American women are actually more likely to suffer from IF due to a higher incidence of fibroids and a greater reluctance to visit the doctor.

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/11/01/sherri-shepherd-and-others-talk-infertility_n_1069671.html

Also, Indifferent to your above statements.

ETA: link

on_a_whim · November 2011

sweetgotham:

THIS

abfromva · November 2011

sweetgotham:

LMAO! I'm going to step out of this post now.

MrsFobeyFobes · November 2011

I don't think it's a dumb question and I am def. not offended. I did have one of my friends tell me "Only white people know when they ovulate, everyone else just has sex and gets knocked up by accident"...no ma'am, I spent a good amount of time TTA and now I am def TTC.

In the same line as your question, I did notice that there were not a lot of "people of color" (I hate that term) on here posting regularly. I am biracial (black West Indian mother; white father.) DH is black american.

I think where the divide lies is in education and birth control usage.

There's my piece on it Smile

Hopeful912 · November 2011

sweetgotham:

LOVE this.

ETA: ...ok. And really. I'm noticing this a lot - If you have to add "stupid question"...maybe you should ask yourself over and over if you should post it.

kygirlie113 · November 2011

on_a_whim:
sweetgotham:

THIS

Yup. ::slowly backs out of post::

abeaverhausen2 · November 2011

I think it is time for you to step away from the computer.

ETA: As an added bonus, you were nearing PW territory so it may save you.

FreyaWin2382 · November 2011

GhostMonkey:
Wow.

Once again, GhostMonkey takes the words (in this case word) right out of my mouth.

OP, I don't think that this is going anywhere good....

cmrand4 · November 2011

A study I came across after googling stated that there are only slight differences in infertility rates. I don't think you can extrapolate any accurate conclusions from your anecdotal sampling from the bump. Surprise

blonddnyc · November 2011

hahah i knew id catch heat for that post, but whats wrong with being a little controversial? anyway, i appreciate the replies.

ETA - whats PW?

on_a_whim · November 2011

MrsFobeyFobes:
I don't think it's a dumb question and I am def. not offended. I did have one of my friends tell me "Only white people know when they ovulate, everyone else just has sex and gets knocked up by accident"...no ma'am, I spent a good amount of time TTA and now I am def TTC.
In the same line as your question, I did notice that there were not a lot of "people of color" (I hate that term) on here posting regularly. I am biracial (black West Indian mother; white father.) DH is black american.
I think where the divide lies is in education and birth control usage.
There's my piece on it

a) I'm curious how you would even know this... (and quite frankly, why it even matters). Don't think I've ever seen an intro that includes "Hi, my name is Jane Doe, I'm 30 years old, and am (enter race here). ????

b) Level of education and birth control usage has nothing to do with IF. Perhaps more with having unplanned pregnancies...but certainly not infertility.

KdgTeacher · November 2011

I don't think the question itself was "bad", but some of the other ummm, gems that spewed from your keyboard are certainly cringe worthy.

LeLe25 · November 2011

sweetgotham:

Right behind ya!!!!!

on_a_whim · November 2011

GhostMonkey:
on_a_whim:
MrsFobeyFobes:

I don't think it's a dumb question and I am def. not offended. I did have one of my friends tell me "Only white people know when they ovulate, everyone else just has sex and gets knocked up by accident"...no ma'am, I spent a good amount of time TTA and now I am def TTC.

In the same line as your question, I did notice that there were not a lot of "people of color" (I hate that term) on here posting regularly. I am biracial (black West Indian mother; white father.) DH is black american.

I think where the divide lies is in education and birth control usage.

There's my piece on it

a) I'm curious how you would even know this... (and quite frankly, why it even matters). Don't think I've ever seen an intro that includes "Hi, my name is Jane Doe, I'm 30 years old, and am (enter race here). ????
b) Level of education and birth control usage has nothing to do with IF. Perhaps more with having unplanned pregnancies...but certainly not infertility.

The point on education comes with the number of women who are able to financially pursue treatments. Lower education levels usually mean lower income, which makes them less likely to go into any kind of even basic IF treatment due to cost.

Yep, totally get that, and agree with you 100%. I read it differently, however, as in infertility itself is affected by level of education and birth control usage, which it is not.

MrsFobeyFobes · November 2011

on_a_whim:
MrsFobeyFobes:
I don't think it's a dumb question and I am def. not offended. I did have one of my friends tell me "Only white people know when they ovulate, everyone else just has sex and gets knocked up by accident"...no ma'am, I spent a good amount of time TTA and now I am def TTC.
In the same line as your question, I did notice that there were not a lot of "people of color" (I hate that term) on here posting regularly. I am biracial (black West Indian mother; white father.) DH is black american.
I think where the divide lies is in education and birth control usage.
There's my piece on it
a) I'm curious how you would even know this... (and quite frankly, why it even matters). Don't think I've ever seen an intro that includes "Hi, my name is Jane Doe, I'm 30 years old, and am (enter race here). ????
b) Level of education and birth control usage has nothing to do with IF. Perhaps more with having unplanned pregnancies...but certainly not infertility.

a) It doesn't matter, if I was someone who really cared I wouldn't be on here at all. I just thought of it after my friend made that comment to me when I was talking about TTC. I'll just leave it there...

b) You're absolutely right... I wrote more, deleted some of it and it made my comment look completely out of left field. I can only judge by what I see and I know that is not a scientific sampling and I am no expert. I'll leave that there, also.

Cool, I ended up being the offensive one!

Mrs.Slick · November 2011

I see a very diverse "crowd" in the waiting room at my RE's office.

MandyBrownNoser · November 2011

Mrs.Slick:
I see a very diverse "crowd" in the waiting room at my RE's office.

No joke, I am currently one of three white patients at my RE's office.

Then again, this town is predominantly black so it isn't that shocking.

KdgTeacher · November 2011

And interesting that OP hasn't come back to the post....

alileecam · November 2011

blonddnyc:

hahah i knew id catch heat for that post, but whats wrong with being a little controversial? anyway, i appreciate the replies.

ETA - whats PW?

PW = post whore

Eags · November 2011

Mrs.Slick:

I see a very diverse "crowd" in the waiting room at my RE's office.

This (well, for the one time I've been anyway).

Mrs.Slick · November 2011

Ok, I hope I handle this delicately:

IF treatments are expensive, something that many many people cannot afford. Financial situations might influence who is pursuing treatments but not who IS infertile. Of course there are many people of different ethnicities (did I spell that right?) who are well within the middle class and above but fact of the matter is the percentage of these sub groups who are not able to pursue treatments than that of "white" people.

And I know of 6 couples (2 Japanese couples, 3 middle eastern couples and 1 eastern European couple) who traveled back home for all their IF treatments b/c even with airfare/trip costs it was still cheaper to do the treatments there than here and there was a level of trust with their home countries doctors too.

Shayliz · November 2011

While I think your question was valid-ish.. your third paragraph was just ignorant.

angelsnight · November 2011

I see nothing offensive about the OP's question. Being a white woman with very few friends outside of other white people, I really don't know what other races do....curiosity and the desire to learn is not a bad thing though.

OP I really have NO idea on your question, anything I could add would be a complete guess and speculation. However, I was watching the new show on on TLC All American-Muslim last week and one of the couples on there has been struggling with TTC (for 4 years).

Now, having grown up in Dearborn and having dated a few muslim men years ago, I can tell you that from an outsiders perspective and just from observation, Muslim/Lebanese women do not seem to have an overall problem with IF. Of course this is NOT a scientific statement, but everyone I knew was one of several (4 or more) siblings, their sisters had several children, their brothers and SIL's had several children....and to some degree for the more conservative Muslims, it was pretty much expected that a woman would get married fairly young (sometimes an arranged marriage) not work outside the home, have many children and be a good wife and mother (this is speaking about the people I knew, I am sure there are many Muslims/Lebanese people who are not this way).

On the show, all of the couples sit and discuss topics, and when the couple spoke about their difficulty to conceive, the others agreed that "adoption wasn't really something that Muslim people did". They didn't expand on it, in fact the one woman even stated she wasn't sure why. But I'm going to guess that in thier culture, a woman who cannot conceive is probably looked upon in a bad light (like she is not being a good wife, as if it's her fault or something) so rather than "broadcast" their inability to conceive (ie IF treatment, adoption) they probably just keep quiet about it and maybe the subject of them never having children is just taboo.

The show ended last week with the woman saying that she (and other Muslims believe) that if you devote yourself to God, he will reward you, and in their case the reward would be a baby, so by the end of the show she decided to begin wearing the hijab again (the headscarf, she stoppd wearing it after 9/11 due to stigma) hoping to be a better Muslim in the eyes of God, and he would then reward her and her husband with a baby.

Anyway, just thought I'd share because I found it to be interesting, and honestly a little sad that people would believe not behaving in a certain way is the reason they have not conceived yet.

blonddnyc · November 2011

KdgTeacher:
And interesting that OP hasn't come back to the post....

im still here... and i posted again ^ see above.

i did some google research and alot of articles said that there is a correalation between the educational level and the amount of children. Young girls getting KU'd with little to no education (no hs diploma) versus women with degrees (BA, MA) and careers who put off getting KU'd til later in life, then face more problems concieving.

that seems to make sense.

sorry im being a PW, ill go to bed now that i got all you ladies riled up.

KdgTeacher · November 2011

angelsnight:

I see nothing offensive about the OP's question. Being a white woman with very few friends outside of other white people, I really don't know what other races do....curiosity and the desire to learn is not a bad thing though.

Numerous people have said the questiong wasn't offensive, but it was this little gem that is side-eye worthy:

it does seem that many mexican/spanish women have lots of children, and i dont know if that because they are more fertile, it just comes naturally, or if they dont practice birth control... one of my BF's is cuban and she got KU 2 times in a row like it was nothing

ChiTown Bridget · November 2011

WTF?

KdgTeacher · November 2011

blonddnyc:

KdgTeacher:
And interesting that OP hasn't come back to the post....

im still here... and i posted again ^ see above.

i did some google research and alot of articles said that there is a correalation between the educational level and the amount of children. Young girls getting KU'd with little to no education (no hs diploma) versus women with degrees (BA, MA) and careers who put off getting KU'd til later in life, then face more problems concieving.

that seems to make sense.

sorry im being a PW, ill go to bed now that i got all you ladies riled up.

I have a BA and an MA I'm 26 and infertile. There goes that theory

blonddnyc · November 2011

KdgTeacher:
angelsnight:

I see nothing offensive about the OP's question. Being a white woman with very few friends outside of other white people, I really don't know what other races do....curiosity and the desire to learn is not a bad thing though.

Numerous people have said the questiong wasn't offensive, but it was this little gem that is side-eye worthy:

it does seem that many mexican/spanish women have lots of children, and i dont know if that because they are more fertile, it just comes naturally, or if they dont practice birth control... one of my BF's is cuban and she got KU 2 times in a row like it was nothing

I think ive answered my own question.. i think its age that has to do with it. I would expound on that but I know Ill just get flamed so Id rather not bother. peace out and gnite yall

angelsnight · November 2011

I also wanted to add (and my first response was long enough), I think a lot of our beleifs about certain groups of people are what we observe, even if they are limited observations (thus the groundwork of some stereotypes).

Perhaps it is true that other races tend to have more children per household than white people. So if we observe a few instances of other races out and about with several children, we tend to form the opinion that "all Mexicans have many children" and therefore do not have IF issues. But we cannot deduct from simple observation how many people of other races have IF issues because nobody wears it as a badge for everyone to see. Just my thoughts.

angelsnight · November 2011

KdgTeacher:
angelsnight:

I see nothing offensive about the OP's question. Being a white woman with very few friends outside of other white people, I really don't know what other races do....curiosity and the desire to learn is not a bad thing though.

Numerous people have said the questiong wasn't offensive, but it was this little gem that is side-eye worthy:

it does seem that many mexican/spanish women have lots of children, and i dont know if that because they are more fertile, it just comes naturally, or if they dont practice birth control... one of my BF's is cuban and she got KU 2 times in a row like it was nothing

Ok, but that doesn't change the fact that I personally did not find it offensive.

cscronce · November 2011

I really don't know where some people get their scientific information. From one friend they know, one observation, a TV show or maybe from up their ass. I don't think I have heard such ignorance spewed without embarrassment in such a long time.

This African American women experiencing IF is active on this board along with many other women of all races/ethnicities. I agree IF doesn't discriminate.

Also I believe that it is ok to be curious, but there is a way to be curious less the ignorance. It's another thing to make random dumb comments and then ask what's wrong with a little controversy. I try to beware of people who say things like " I don't mean to come off as racist."

The cure to ignorance is knowledge, but there is no cure for a donkey, but to kick it in the ass. Blonddnyc bend over.

I am not a mean person and anyone who look at my previous posts can see that I only give the most sincere and encouraging comments, but you asked for this one.

FutureMrsBB · November 2011

angelsnight:

I see nothing offensive about the OP's question. Being a white woman with very few friends outside of other white people, I really don't know what other races do....curiosity and the desire to learn is not a bad thing though.

I stopped reading this response right here ....

Maryland Baby · November 2011

Too many people have too many opinions on this and people easily take it offensively. Whilst I personally didn't see a problem with it you should stay well away from a # of topics.. this is 1 of those topics I am sorry to say, nothing good can come of this.

GonnaBMrs.A · November 2011

cscronce:

I really don't know where some people get their scientific information. From one friend they know, one observation, a TV show or maybe from up their ass. I don't think I have heard such ignorance spewed without embarrassment in such a long time.

This African American women experiencing IF is active on this board along with many other women of all races/ethnicities. I agree IF doesn't discriminate.

Also I believe that it is ok to be curious, but there is a way to be curious less the ignorance. It's another thing to make random dumb comments and then ask what's wrong with a little controversy. I try to beware of people who say things like " I don't mean to come off as racist."

The cure to ignorance is knowledge, but there is no cure for a donkey, but to kick it in the ass. Blonddnyc bend over.

I am not a mean person and anyone who look at my previous posts can see that I only give the most sincere and encouraging comments, but you asked for this one.

Yes

Thank you.

sweetgotham · November 2011

BrazilianPeach:
Wow.... I guess no one in Brazil has IF issues. I am safe! *runs naked celebrating!!!!*

That must be what Carnival is really all about!

angelsnight · November 2011

FutureMrsBB:
angelsnight:

I see nothing offensive about the OP's question. Being a white woman with very few friends outside of other white people, I really don't know what other races do....curiosity and the desire to learn is not a bad thing though.

I stopped reading this response right here ....

I find it funny that you felt the need to reply, to tell me you stopped reading. Um ok?

ashleyamberRN · November 2011

cscronce:
I try to beware of people who say things like " I don't mean to come off as racist."

From my perspective, I dont think the post started off bad or harmful, but you did lose me in your third paragraph.

and totally agree with quoted poster! It's like saying something totally offensive, but making it "ok" by adding "no offense" afterwards. Still offensive, and still a bit racist.

Deethebee · November 2011

cscronce:
I really don't know where some people get their scientific information. From one friend they know, one observation, a TV show or maybe from up their ass. I don't think I have heard such ignorance spewed without embarrassment in such a long time.
This African American women experiencing IF is active on this board along with many other women of all races/ethnicities. I agree IF doesn't discriminate.
Also I believe that it is ok to be curious, but there is a way to be curious less the ignorance. It's another thing to make random dumb comments and then ask what's wrong with a little controversy. I try to beware of people who say things like " I don't mean to come off as racist."
The cure to ignorance is knowledge, but there is no cure for a donkey, but to kick it in the ass. Blonddnyc bend over.
I am not a mean person and anyone who look at my previous posts can see that I only give the most sincere and encouraging comments, but you asked for this one.

All this. A simple way to have asked the question is: Have there been any studies done regarding correlation b/w ethnicity and infertility. Period. The Mexican comment was uncalled for. And I'm surprised someone in NYC who is surrounded by such a diverse population would say something so ignorant. OP should word things more carefully next time and with some more sensitivity.

brookelynpaisley · November 2011

blonddnyc:

KdgTeacher:
And interesting that OP hasn't come back to the post....

im still here... and i posted again ^ see above.

i did some google research and alot of articles said that there is a correalation between the educational level and the amount of children. Young girls getting KU'd with little to no education (no hs diploma) versus women with degrees (BA, MA) and careers who put off getting KU'd til later in life, then face more problems concieving.

that seems to make sense.

sorry im being a PW, ill go to bed now that i got all you ladies riled up.

You're confusing accidental pregnancy with infertility. NOT the same thing. There's a huge difference between not having the education and understanding of fertility and how to avoid pregnancy, and not being able to achieve pregnancy.

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