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Natural Birth
Midwife consultations...
How many midwives (and/or doctors, birthing centers, etc.) did you meet with before deciding who was right for you? Were they recommended to you, or did you find them on your own?
We're going to our first consultations, and were curious as to whether other parents-to-be had "shopped" around, or just went with the first fit...
Thanks for the help!
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Re: Midwife consultations...
My sister gave me some great advice. "When you meet the right midwife, it will be like when you meet your husband. You'll just know." We met with a set of midwives who work together and just absolutely had an amazing connection with them. They ended up being the first ones we met. Mine was recommended by my chiropractor actually.
I had every intention of interviewing more, but really just knew they were it. Definitely look around and interview till you feel comfortable!
My options were pretty limited, as there are only three that serve my area outside of birth centers. One of them had no web site and hardly any info about her online, and I did not know anybody who had met her. The second was very far for me to drive for appointments and had no voice mail for me to leave a message when I called her--or maybe she does, and her phone was just being serviced that day, but in any case I couldn't leave her a message. Her web site was mainly a bio with little info about her practices and care. The third has a very useful web site, is closest to me, formerly worked with an obstetric nurse I know, and called me back very promptly after I left her a message. When I met her and the other midwife in her practice, it went very well. We decided right away to not fart around trying to get ahold of the other midwife again and switched our care the very next week.
So, yes, I went with the first one I met, but there was still some research involved. We felt good about her right off the bat because she had ready answers to all our questions, had info to give us that we hadn't thought to ask about, and was really thorough in discussing things. At the same time, she was friendly and not too clinical. Her waiting room has water and tea, comfy sofas, toys for children, a lot of resources for moms, and books/magazines in it--again, very professional but without the doctor office feel.
And in a small town, I don't have a lot of options.
Anyway, the appt. with the HB midwife was first. I had done tons of research about HB before the appt. And the midwife was absolutely amazing. After the appt., I told DH that I was cancelling the other appt.
It was totally the right decision for us. And we are happily planning a HB for this LO!
We toured a birth center and met with 3 midwife groups. I loved all of the midwives but I think the last ones were the best fit for us. They also were full when we first got them as a recommendation but had a very strange situation where a spot opened up and I kept telling my husband that it was divine intervention! They were meant for us.
With that said, I would have hired them all if I could have. They were all knowledgeable and supportive and tender with my 2 year old.
My baby is two!!! Baby girl 9/17/09
My other baby is still a baby! Baby Boy 11-30-11
We had set up consultations with two birth centers after first going with an OB and touring hospitals that disssapointed me.
One birth center was pretty hard to even schedule time with, so when we went to the other birht center and were really impressed we just went with them. We don't have 'one' midwife, but rather have a team of 4 that we rotate our appointments with. Any one of them could be on duty when it's our time to deliver this kiddo, so the expectation is that by that time we'll know them all. So far they all seem great and all have their own personalities. I don't really like one more than the others.. which works for me. :-)
I think shopping around is fine, but just go into it with some flexibility. Ask lots of questions and ask about how you'll know that mid-wife will be there for your birth and what the plan is if she is not (i.e. who is her backup?).
My birth center was recommended to me by a friend... I called an set up an interview and they paired me with the midwife based on my due date. She was exactly the personality I was looking for, and she came highly recommended by a friend. We talked about looking around some more, but in the end I just felt like she would be a really good fit.
Later I found out my midwife is the most requested person at the birth center. She usually has a waiting list. We got lucky somehow...
Well, there are more or less three ways to birth with a MW.
1) Home birth
2) Birth center
3) Regular hospital birth, but through an OBGYN practice that offers midwife services
I know a lot of women like #3 because they can still keep their midwife and have pro-natural-birth support even if they go high risk, but it doesn't help you avoid the hospital, and it sounds like you want that. The easiest way to find one of these is to look at a bunch of your local OBGYN practices, see if any of them list midwife support on their web sites, and/or make some calls. Even if you find one that's full, you can at least ask them for a recommendation. A lot of the midwife finder web sites will not list these, so you have to probably do your own leg work.
For #2, it's a little easier because you can call hospitals directly and ask if they are affiliated with a midwife birth center. Googling can also also help you here if you live in an area with a lot of hospitals and ten calls to various departments sounds like a recipe for a cranky pregnant lady ready to throw her phone out the window because of bad hold music.
With #1, there are some handy web sites you could use.
https://www.midwife.org/rp/find.cfm
https://www.mothersnaturally.org/midwives/findAMidwife.php
The problem here, though, is that these may be out of date for your area. I know for me, one was not listed who does serve my area, while another was listed who moved to Canada last year and is clearly no longer serving my area. If you can get ahold of one, though, even if she is full or is too far away for you, she can probably offer you a recommendation.
Of course, with any type of MW care, it's great if you know somebody who has done it who can make a first hand recommendation. If there is a natural birth blog that somebody local to you runs, that might be a good resource for you, too.