Babies on the Brain

Um, how do we address this?

Allie is in a habit of taking money.  Tonight we went to TGIF.  She wanted to pay the waiter.  We gave her the book and told her to hand it to the man.  She took the money out and handed him the book. 

We came home and I emptied my pockets and put cash on the bar.  She was running around playing and asked if she could put money in her piggy bank.  She had a quarter in her hand.  She took my money and put it in her piggy bank.  DH and I just spent 20 min digging it out. 

We have addressed it by saying "Allie we don't take money that does not belong to us.  It is very hurtful when you take something that isn't yours."  We also asked how she would feel if we took her toys and hid them.  We explained how putting our money in her bank is like hiding our money.  

Any other suggestions?   

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Re: Um, how do we address this?

  • Did she take your change or the money you were supposed to pay with?

     

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  • You've done what I would do. If it kept up, I'd do whatever discipline methods you use already.
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  • imageMelaneigh1:

    Did she take your change or the money you were supposed to pay with?

     

    She took all of the money tonight.  It was the tab and a tip.  

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  • imageMysterious_wife:
    imageMelaneigh1:

    Did she take your change or the money you were supposed to pay with?

     

    She took all of the money tonight.  It was the tab and a tip.  

    Allie!

    I don't know what to tell you, but I think I would be very sternly talking to her.

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  • imageMelaneigh1:
    imageMysterious_wife:
    imageMelaneigh1:

    Did she take your change or the money you were supposed to pay with?

     

    She took all of the money tonight.  It was the tab and a tip.  

    Allie!

    I don't know what to tell you, but I think I would be very sternly talking to her.

    We had to hold back our chuckle.  We wanted to laugh, but this is a serious issue.  She has done it before and we let is slide since it was a few bucks.   

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  • I wouldn't let her "pay" anymore. And I wouldn't leave money out where she can get to it. I would table the money playing for a while.
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  • imagemrsadamc 05:
    I wouldn't let her "pay" anymore. And I wouldn't leave money out where she can get to it. I would table the money playing for a while.

    Are you listening to my DH right now?  He just said the same thing.  

    Thanks ladies.  

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  • imageMysterious_wife:
    imageMelaneigh1:

    Did she take your change or the money you were supposed to pay with?

     

    She took all of the money tonight.  It was the tab and a tip.  

    I hope you relized this before you left and thus didnt dine and dash?

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  • Honestly, I would march her happy butt down to the restaurant and make her give them the money and apologize for stealing. That server likely had your tab come out of his take home last night, and Allie is definitely old enough to understand stealingis wrong.
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  • Wait, did you get home before you realized it, or did you correct it in the restaurant? I would make a pretty big deal out of it, it's stealing. Stealing and lying bother me more than hitting and biting. I wouldn't let her even touch money for a while, and when she asks why I would tell her it's because she can't be trusted, she's stealing. After a week or two of this I might start to let her handle very small amounts of money and make a big deal about how you have to learn to trust her again. If you got home from the restaurant before you realized what happened, I would make Allie go to the restaurant to return the money and apologize to the server and to the manager.
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  • imageScout2005:

    I didn't get from the OP that Allie took the server's money home, just that she took it out of the book at the restaurant. I assume MW or DH took it back and gave it to the server.

    Maybe I read the OP wrong, but I thought the money she took at home and put in her piggy bank was separate from the money taken at the restaurant?

    No you didn't read it wrong. Other people did.

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  • Lib (and some random lurker) do you really think I would have let Allie walk out without paying?  She is 4 not 14. We didn't leave her completely in charge of paying. We never left her unattended.  We would have noticed a wad of money in her hand when putting her in the car seat.  I may be a lot of things, but a thief is not one of them. We paid the waiter and scolded Allie on the spot.  The money she put in her bank was MY money out of MY pocket as stated above.  I am actually a little hurt people would think I am low enough to walk out on a tab.  

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  • I also stated above we addressed taking things that do not belong to us is hurtful to the owner.  Again, 4 not 14.  I was trying to put things in a small child prospective.  
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  • imageMysterious_wife:

    Lib (and some random lurker) do you really think I would have let Allie walk out without paying?  She is 4 not 14. We didn't leave her completely in charge of paying. We never left her unattended.  We would have noticed a wad of money in her hand when putting her in the car seat.  I may be a lot of things, but a thief is not one of them. We paid the waiter and scolded Allie on the spot.  The money she put in her bank was MY money out of MY pocket as stated above.  I am actually a little hurt people would think I am low enough to walk out on a tab.  

    There was some serious reading comprehension fails on their part.  I never once thought that you left without paying.  And I don't think you are low enough to walk out on a tab.  MW, I think you dealt with it appropriately and just have to make some changes in the future.   

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  • imagebekah22587@hotmail.com:
    imageMysterious_wife:
    imageMelaneigh1:

    Did she take your change or the money you were supposed to pay with?

     

    She took all of the money tonight.  It was the tab and a tip.  

    I hope you relized this before you left and thus didnt dine and dash?

    This is where my question came from? I dont know you or the age of your child(I just discovered this board). I certainly dont think your a "low life". I'm sorry if you took it that way.

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  • MW, I'm so sorry. The first read through I thought she took the money, you saw it, and then you paid him. Then someone asked which portion of the money it was, and you said tab+tip, that's what confused me. I absolutely don't think you would walk out on a bill or leave Allie unsupervised. I thought it was a mix-up, but I misunderstood. Sorry I hurt your feelings!! ETA: I hope this is coming off sincerely, not sarcastically, I feel really bad that you're feeling bad about this.
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