Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
catrinawaves
member
Re: 40 weeks and feeling discouraged
Feeling discouraged is understandable, I hope the contractions pick up and do what they need to do.
In regards to the RCS date, I know 41 weeks is their policy but can you bargain for at least the 25th so you don't miss Thanksgiving with your family? I hope it won't be an issue and that either way you enjoy the day with your new baby!
Is there any specific reason why you can't go past 41 weeks? Can you see if you can do NSTs after 41 weeks, and keep going for even a few more days past it if you and the baby are doing fine? That might make you feel less stressed about going into labor, also.
Hang in there, though. I was so beyond stressed when I went past due with my second son - VBAC moms don't need any added stress!! Good luck!
DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)
Just wanted to say you're not alone in the "overdue and discouraged" club! I will be 41 weeks on Friday... We start doing NSTs next Week and if those are ok, I get a green light to keep going to 42. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it doesn't come to that....
It's worth a shot to ask your ob if you can go past 41 weeks with extra monitoring... Mine was totally on board with it. Good luck!
I think it's totally normal to feel that way. I was feeling discouraged probably the entire last month of my second pregnancy. I agree with others about seeing if you can push the RCS date back.
GL!
The end of pregnancy, particularly when you're aiming for a VBAC, is so challenging! I know how you must be feeling. I agree with pp about asking to push the date back just a few days even. I went into labor at 41 weeks and a day and had my baby at 41 weeks and 2 days (early morning). I tried every trick in the book to get my labor going for weeks - membrane sweeps, acupuncture, chiropractic, tons of spicy food, sex with orgasm (that is a challenge at 40+ weeks!), evening primrose oil vaginally, then eventually a small amount of castor oil at the very end that seemed to flip the switch. My labor was pretty fast and uneventful and I definitely preferred it to my induction with my first, which ended in a c/s due to failure to progress.
GL! I hope things pick up for you soon.
Something tells me the doctor would certainly appriciate waiting until after Thanksgiving...
Thanks everyone. I had the NST this morning, and she passed with flying colors. Which is the good news; the bad is that I'm still only 1 cm dilated with a posterior cervix, meaning sweeping the membranes is pretty tricky and probably didn't work (again).
The MW is going to talk to the OB about pushing back the RCS date to possibly the following Monday, 11/28. Hopefully none of this will be necessary, and this little lady decides to make her entrance soon!