Success after IF

Would this bother you? RE: My MIL and pictures

My MIL always wants to go through my pictures of LO to print out.  She just went on a trip to visit some family on the East Coast and printed out 75 of MY pictures to take with her.  

Now, I am friends with all of these people on FB, so they see the pictures I put up there.  It REALLY irritates me because I take great pride in my pictures.  I just want to say, bring your own dang camera women!  

How do I tell her no the next time?   

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Re: Would this bother you? RE: My MIL and pictures

  • It wouldn't bother me. MIL is all about printing out pix of DD, and if I happen to take better/more pictures, that's just easier for her. I'd take it as a flattering sign that she likes your photography and that she wants to show off her grandchild.
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  • I honestly don't see what the big deal is. It wouldn't bother me at all. In fact, I print out pictures all the time for my parents, in laws, grandparents, etc. I think it's nice that she wants to show off her grandson to family.
    TTC for 19 months. Dx: PCOS. 3 IUI's with Clomid= BFN 1st IUI with injectables= BFP imageBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • No, it wouldn't.  Honestly, she probably knows your pictures are so much better than hers or any she would take.  She wants to show of her grandson the best way :).
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  • I have always been the picture taker in my family. My mother doesn't even own a camera and it takes about a half hour to show her how to view a digital pic with a camera. So I share all the pics I take of DS with her. Not a big deal IMO. If there are ones I don't want to share, then I just don't show her - but he is far too cute not to share!
    A lot of years and a million tears finally led me to you.
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  • No, it wouldn't bother me at all and, honestly, I don't really understand what the problem is.  My mother, MIL, aunt, sister, father, etc... all carry pictures I've taken.  Everytime there are new pictures, they print them out, either from facebook or when I've sent them to them, to take and show off.
    Lisa
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  • Wouldn't bother me either...sorry!
  • Ok, maybe I'm being a PITA then when she asks.  I'll calm down next time.  

    Thanks, girls! 

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  • I would be super annoyed too! But no idea how to get out of sharing...
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  • well, just to illustrate how opposite she COULD be... my parents NEVER take piks of Ava, never ask to make copies of the ones *I* do of her, and don't display anything of her in their home unless I print it out and frame it.

    I can kinda see why you're irritated, but I say this falls under "pick your battles" ;-)

     

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  • Im actually the exact opposite. I like my photos much better than the ones our families take, and It irritates me when there are 400 cameras in LOs face at the same time. I beg them to just let me bring my camera and promise to email photos around that same day! 

  • My only question - is she printing them out on your computer, or is she doing it at home, or are they being sent to a store to be printed?

    My only gripe woudl be if she wants to use YOUR computer and  YOUR ink and paper.  Other than that, i wouldn't care.

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  • I think the only way it would bother me is if she was claiming the pictures were her own/not giving me credit if other people asked or commented on them.   

    Otherwise, my mom/MIL aren't around DD nearly enough to have great pictures of their own (and honestly, it drives me batty when my mom does take pictures, because she SUCKS at it and it takes FOREVER).   If they didn't share my pictures with their friends/family, they would have none to share!   Doesn't bother me one bit.

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  • I don't mind sharing my pics with ILs and I do all the time, but I wouldn't print 75 pics for them because it would cost a fortune in ink printing them at home.  That is the only thing that would bother me.  I will gladly upload them to costco's photo center for them and have them waiting at their costco in their name.  I've done that for my sister a few times and she loves it and I get to choose the pics so if there is one I don't like I don't have it printed for her and she gets all the pics she wants.  I had something like 40 pics printed for her and it only cost her $3 and change at costco and she was so happy to have them.
    TTC since 8/2004
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  • It wouldn't bother me at all. My MIL loves her grandchild and wants to show her off - this is a great thing and a wonderful gift! Maybe my FR relatives have already seen the pictures, and then she shows them to her. Well, I doubt they will remember they saw them online, I don't think anyone but really me and my husband pay that much attention to any given picture of my daughter.

    I guess I just don't understand why you take great pride in your pictures, and then are offended that your MIL also loves them.

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  • I don't think it is that big of a deal as an outsider, BUT I have a tenuous at best, relationship with my MIL, so EVERYTHING she does/says is wrong! I wonder if that is the case with you?
  • I prefer to be the picture taker and then I upload all the photos and email the links to the family.  My IL's always print what they want and I print photos for my parents.  My MIL works for a photo developing store so it works out best this way.  I prefer my own photos and I hate having 5 people all wanting to take the same picture.
  • That wouldn't bother me but I don't take a lot of pictures sometimes I'm even "stealing" hers haha.  Owell.  If you are that bothered by it just say something...although I think she would prob get upset because I doubt she means to step on your toes.  She's just a proud grandma in my opinion!

    "I have four children. Two are adopted. I forget which two. -Bob Constantine

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  • imageDr.Loretta:
    It wouldn't bother me. MIL is all about printing out pix of DD, and if I happen to take better/more pictures, that's just easier for her. I'd take it as a flattering sign that she likes your photography and that she wants to show off her grandchild.

    Ditto this exactly. DH sends his mom pics we've taken constantly for her to print out and hang in her office. She even emails me to ask for Boodle's monthly pics as she hangs each one. I know I have the best pics of my kids and don't mind sharing at all.

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  • That wouldn't bother me.  We have a photosharing site that we upload pics to almost daily.  My grandparents print tons of them off to show to their friends.  I don't mind. 

    I think she's just very proud of her grandbaby and wants to show him off :)

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  • I would be annoyed.  Do you have them on a site where anyone can see them and order prints?  Is that what you mean by she printed them out?  If so, you can always not post to the site all of your pics, just the ones that are cool for anyone to print and have for themselves.  If she is using a printer at home (including your home) to print them, again, how does she have access to ALL of your pics?? Are you allowing her to browse through them all?  I take LOADS of pics and download them and save them all, but I don't post them all to FB or to any site for that matter.  And when family visits, I don't sit down with them to have them go through ALL of the pics I have taken.  That's just odd to me.  What I want to share I post or send via e-mail.  The rest are mine to keep and do with as I please.  I share the ones I want to share and the rest I keep for myself.  My Mom has a camera that she hardly uses, my MIL doesn't own a camera .... I take pictures of them with DS and then send to them or post for them the ones they are in.  The other pics I pick and choose what to give them.  I am with you on this - it irritate me big time too.  I think the solution is not to show them all the pics.  If they don't know they exist, they won't want copies :)
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  • My MIL does a lot of crazy an annoying things but this isn't one of them and even if she did do this it wouldn't bother me.  My own mother prints off my pictures all the time and I'm more than happy to share my pictures of my cuties.

    Kelly, Mom to Christopher Shannon 9.27.06, Catherine Quinn 2.24.09, Trey Barton lost on 12.28.09, Therese Barton lost on 6.10.10, Joseph Sullivan 7.23.11, and our latest, Victoria Maren 11.15.12

    Secondary infertility success with IVF, then two losses, one at 14 weeks and one at 10 weeks, then success with IUI and then just pure, crazy luck.  Expecting our fifth in May as the result of a FET.

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  • My Mom makes copies of my pictures all the time and I have no problem with it. I take these pictures for everyone to enjoy. If she had to take the pictures they would all be fuzzy and there would be two since she never remembers to bring her camera.
    TTC since 10/06 - Went to RE after 6 months of TTC due to AMA -Diagnosed with MIF 5/07, only option IVF with ICSI - IVF #1 cancelled due to cyst, never got to ER - IVF #1.5 10/07, BFP - Robert Andrew born 7/30/08 Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers
  • I have no problem with the grandparents printing out copies of our photos, but what I DO have a problem with is this...

    Taking the photos from FB and posting them in their own FB albums. My Dad has started doing this, and it makes me NUTS!!! I don't know how to tell him I don't want him to do it. He just wants to share his grandkids with his friends, but darn it...I have my settings so that only MY friends can see the pictures, and that's how I want it! It really bugs me... I'm not sure why it does, but it really, really does.

  • Of all the inlaw crap that people put up with, wanting to take "your" pictures to show off is really not a big deal. I'd be delighted if my inlaws or anyone else for that matter wanted to show off my photography and my child. 
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