FFFC

VABride2008 · October 2011

califorever81:

I think it's kinda funny that the crunchy post from yesterday prompted so many FFC today. The poster was just asking if other bump mommas were making some of the same choices, not judging those that aren't. Seems people are uncomfortable doing what they think is best for their family.

I'm as "crunchy" as they comes, going steps farther into it then a lot of mommas. I truly think it is best (doesn't everyone think that of their choices?), but I can honestly tell you I couldn't care less about the title, and I couldn't care less what other mothers do.

Yes I don't care what you do with your kid but don't judge me because it's something I'm passionate about. I don't do these things just because it's the "cool" thing to do. Trust me, I've seen enough ladies on here attempt the "cool" things and they usually go by the wayside in about a month of trying it.

Huahine · October 2011

MrsLeanna:
I"m pretty sure on this board when people say co-sleeping they are referring to bedsharing.
And for me bedsharing was something that I always said that I would never do and then all of a sudden I was sleep deprived and delirious and with a newborn that wouldn't sleep in the bassinet at night and I found myself sleeping with a baby on my chest!! I kind of went with the whatever works philosophy. I didn't do it for any other reason than I needed my sleep!
*Disclaimer - I am not flaming nor arguing, just stating an opinion

My impression is that your experience is very common. Parents may not plan to bedshare, but end up doing whatever it takes to get the baby to sleep. So it makes sense to me to learn about safe bedsharing (not having the child near pillows, under heavy blankets, or between parents - dads are more likely to rollover on a child than a breastfeeding mother) so as to make that choice as healthy as possible, rather than dismissing the option out of hand.

lucky81089 · October 2011

MrsLeanna:

I"m pretty sure on this board when people say co-sleeping they are referring to bedsharing.

And for me bedsharing was something that I always said that I would never do and then all of a sudden I was sleep deprived and delirious and with a newborn that wouldn't sleep in the bassinet at night and I found myself sleeping with a baby on my chest!! I kind of went with the whatever works philosophy. I didn't do it for any other reason than I needed my sleep!

*Disclaimer - I am not flaming nor arguing, just stating an opinion

ETA this is in response to the co-sleeping thing and the AAP link, I just didn't want to quote it because it was so long.

This (bolded) was the impression I was under due to how I usually hear it discussed. I do plan to keep baby in our room in a bassinet at times for the first few months, but she will not be in our bed. I googled "cosleeping" before my post to make sure I wasn't mistaken and the first two links were referring to bedsharing as cosleeping.

Excerpt from cosleeping.org (first link that comes up):

Cosleeping (sometimes spelled co-sleeping, and also known as bed sharing or "having a family bed") is the practice of having your infant in your bed with you during sleep. Cosleeping promotes breastfeeding and bonding, and it is safer than crib/cot sleeping when practiced correctly. Cosleeping beyond the breastfeeding years is common in many non-Western cultures, and even in the West many families choose to extend cosleeping through toddlerhood and well into middle childhood.

I guess I should've clicked more links. My mistake Smile I do appreciate the info though, Huahine.

ronnie day · October 2011

ChefMomAmy:
sacarpenter2620:
Also my other "flame" is that people are not leaving these posts "flame-free." Isn't that the point of the Friday thread? Let people have their opinions and express their ideas without having someone else's opinions thrust on them....because truth is we probably won't change our opinions no matter what!
THIS. It's not called "Argue with me and try to change my mind Friday".
Oh and I have another one. I hate flip flops. Absolutely hate them. I think they are neither comfortable nor cute. I especially don't get when people just love them soooo much that they'll wear them while it's pouring rain and 50 degrees outside, or wear them with dress clothes.

I will argue with you on the flip flop part They are the only thing that I can wear these days and if I could wear them every day of my life, I would. I live in flip flops. I have nice ones, and cheap ones, and have them in various colors...I think I have more flip flops than I do pants. I LIVE in them.

Ninasama · October 2011

firegirle1:
sheetzsa:
Jessiree:

I am so tired of the GTT posts. All of them: I passed, I didn't pass, I don't know if I passed, how do I pass? It's not a hard concept, you are either going to have it or you're not and if you do have it it's really not the end of the world.

AMEN!

I really hate the "How do I pass?" questions. How do you pass? By not having GD. Why would you WANT to pass if you have it???? Don't you want to know! Not knowing does not make it go away.

This was mine too! I totally judge these posts. I know GD is a serious diagnosis and the diet sucks, but shouldn't you care about knowing the truth?!

ronnie day · October 2011

MrsLeanna:
I"m pretty sure on this board when people say co-sleeping they are referring to bedsharing.
And for me bedsharing was something that I always said that I would never do and then all of a sudden I was sleep deprived and delirious and with a newborn that wouldn't sleep in the bassinet at night and I found myself sleeping with a baby on my chest!! I kind of went with the whatever works philosophy. I didn't do it for any other reason than I needed my sleep!
*Disclaimer - I am not flaming nor arguing, just stating an opinion
ETA this is in response to the co-sleeping thing and the AAP link, I just didn't want to quote it because it was so long.

This. For years before I had my DD I said we would never bedshare/cosleep. We ended up bedsharing for 14 months because I EBF and it made nights way more tolerable and morning easier. I totally plan on doing the same with this one, as a matter of fact we aren't even buying a crib for this one. We fully intend on doing what we did with our first, from our bed to a toddler bed (she wouldn't sleep in a crib).

To each their own. But I will say, at 2am, you will do just about anything to get that kid to shut it and go back to sleep...

den&riss717 · October 2011

littlemonster417:

1. I am PLANNING an induction, and excited for it.

2. I am NOT a crunchy mama.

1. ME TOO!!

kcvasquez · October 2011

Okay, I didn't have one until now. I cannot stand when FTM's use the words, I will never....or my child will not....Really?! You don't have a child and trust me you will be choking on your words a year from now. It's nice to think that you have the perfect plan on how to raise your child, for now. Keep those rainbows and unicorns going as long as you can I guess because until that baby is in your arms you have no idea how you will actually raise your child. Sorry, you just don't. We've all been there, I used to think "OMG, my children will never eat McDonald's, never sleep in a carrier, never hold their own bottle." Blah, blah, blah. It all goes down the drain when everything goes to he!l in a hand basket within the matter of a minute! If you're a second time plus mom, you all know what I am talking about!

Reading some of these very judgy FTM posts are starting to p!ss me off. You don't know until you've been there!

cynasmin · October 2011

Not to say I won't do it...but having the baby in our bed scares me. I worry about the various safety issues, creating a distance between DH and myself and the potential to establish a bad habit (I realize most everything can be altered and adjusted in time). I know a few people whos 4-10yrs old still bed share. And unfortunately i don't know anyone who has done it for a period of time who now doesn't and its problematic for all of those families and marriages I'm sure many of you have been a lot more successful at it but these folks really mind that 10yrs later no one is sleeping through the night

I'm going to have to be pretty desperate to allow the baby in our bed. Not saying others haven't been totally just in their decision even ones who wanted to for all the reasons people mention why its great- doing whats right for them and best for their situation. not saying i won't do it... but i REALLY don't want too. Right now I view it like BF i know its going to be tough in the beginning but i think it will make things easier in the long run.

Not flaming anyone that does it, it just scares the crap out of me!

MrsLeanna · October 2011

cynasmin:
Not to say I won't do it...but having the baby in our bed scares me. I worry about the various safety issues, creating a distance between DH and myself and the potential to establish a bad habit (I realize most everything can be altered and adjusted in time). I know a few people whos 4-10yrs old still bed share. And unfortunately i don't know anyone who has done it for a period of time who now doesn't and its problematic for all of those families and marriages I'm sure many of you have been a lot more successful at it but these folks really mind that 10yrs later no one is sleeping through the night
I'm going to have to be pretty desperate to allow the baby in our bed. Not saying others haven't been totally just in their decision even ones who wanted to for all the reasons people mention why its great- doing whats right for them and best for their situation. not saying i won't do it... but i REALLY don't want too. Right now I view it like BF i know its going to be tough in the beginning but i think it will make things easier in the long run.
Not flaming anyone that does it, it just scares the crap out of me!

I'll just speak from MY experience. I was DESPERATE, absolutely delirious not sleeping at all with a baby who would not sleep in the bassinet - refused. I did what I had to and I would do it again. It was for a short period of time and she did start sleeping in the bassinet and then eventually in the crib. I fully 100000% believe that it is impossible for a little baby to create a habit. They don't have a memory yet it's all minute to minute for them. It has never come between my marriage at all, what did come between my husband and I was the raging mean b!tch I was because I was getting no sleep and needed sleep so badly that I would take it however it came.

I have also done bed sharing when DD is sick. When she has a fever of 103 or 104 at night I want her next to me so I can check on her throughout the night. Even after she was old enough where it could have become a habit it never did - a few nights and then back to her bed, she asks once or twice and sleeping with us and the answer is no and then it's back to normal.

jinnlinn · October 2011

It weirds me out when people are still BFing when a kid is like 1.5-2 years old. I mean if they can come up to you, grab your Boob and ask for milk aren't they too old.

cynasmin · October 2011

MrsLeanna:
cynasmin:
Not to say I won't do it...but having the baby in our bed scares me. I worry about the various safety issues, creating a distance between DH and myself and the potential to establish a bad habit (I realize most everything can be altered and adjusted in time). I know a few people whos 4-10yrs old still bed share. And unfortunately i don't know anyone who has done it for a period of time who now doesn't and its problematic for all of those families and marriages I'm sure many of you have been a lot more successful at it but these folks really mind that 10yrs later no one is sleeping through the night
I'm going to have to be pretty desperate to allow the baby in our bed. Not saying others haven't been totally just in their decision even ones who wanted to for all the reasons people mention why its great- doing whats right for them and best for their situation. not saying i won't do it... but i REALLY don't want too. Right now I view it like BF i know its going to be tough in the beginning but i think it will make things easier in the long run.
Not flaming anyone that does it, it just scares the crap out of me!
I'll just speak from MY experience. I was DESPERATE, absolutely delirious not sleeping at all with a baby who would not sleep in the bassinet - refused. I did what I had to and I would do it again. It was for a short period of time and she did start sleeping in the bassinet and then eventually in the crib. I fully 100000% believe that it is impossible for a little baby to create a habit. They don't have a memory yet it's all minute to minute for them. It has never come between my marriage at all, what did come between my husband and I was the raging mean b!tch I was because I was getting no sleep and needed sleep so badly that I would take it however it came.
I have also done bed sharing when DD is sick. When she has a fever of 103 or 104 at night I want her next to me so I can check on her throughout the night. Even after she was old enough where it could have become a habit it never did - a few nights and then back to her bed, she asks once or twice and sleeping with us and the answer is no and then it's back to normal.

I'm glad that you found something that got you some rest and helped ease any marriage tensions! I can see where it makes total sense to do this, which is why i say "not saying i won't" that being said I'm happy to see some examples where it was a temporary used thing that was helpful at the time but not ongoing. Otherwise I'd probably be having a nervous breakdown not wanting to do it but feeling like I must.

mudluscious4 · October 2011

sacarpenter2620:

Also my other "flame" is that people are not leaving these posts "flame-free." Isn't that the point of the Friday thread? Let people have their opinions and express their ideas without having someone else's opinions thrust on them....because truth is we probably won't change our opinions no matter what!

Here here!

With that said, my FFFC is NBR. I do not respect political opinions that differ from my own. I will let you have them, I will let you say them and most of the time I will not debate you, I will smile and nod while you say what you believe. But in my mind I am not saying "well, everyone's life experience is different and blah blah". No. In my head I am thinking that you're an A.H.

KlovesG · October 2011

ChefMomAmy:

I judge people who consistently post in the following style:

Run-on sentences; no paragraphs, just a wall of text; using they're/their/there improperly, and putting apostrophes where they have no business being.

I guess that makes me a grammar nazi a*shole, but I'm assuming we did all pass elementary school....

this!

PhoxySteph · October 2011

I cried my eyes out on my 30th birthday.

chigirlinaz · October 2011

kcvasquez:
Okay, I didn't have one until now. I cannot stand when FTM's use the words, I will never....or my child will not....Really?! You don't have a child and trust me you will be choking on your words a year from now. It's nice to think that you have the perfect plan on how to raise your child, for now. Keep those rainbows and unicorns going as long as you can I guess because until that baby is in your arms you have no idea how you will actually raise your child. Sorry, you just don't. We've all been there, I used to think "OMG, my children will never eat McDonald's, never sleep in a carrier, never hold their own bottle." Blah, blah, blah. It all goes down the drain when everything goes to he!l in a hand basket within the matter of a minute! If you're a second time plus mom, you all know what I am talking about!
Reading some of these very judgy FTM posts are starting to p!ss me off. You don't know until you've been there!

Preach on!! I was an awesome parent until I actually became one. Wink

kcvasquez · October 2011

chigirlinaz:
kcvasquez:
Okay, I didn't have one until now. I cannot stand when FTM's use the words, I will never....or my child will not....Really?! You don't have a child and trust me you will be choking on your words a year from now. It's nice to think that you have the perfect plan on how to raise your child, for now. Keep those rainbows and unicorns going as long as you can I guess because until that baby is in your arms you have no idea how you will actually raise your child. Sorry, you just don't. We've all been there, I used to think "OMG, my children will never eat McDonald's, never sleep in a carrier, never hold their own bottle." Blah, blah, blah. It all goes down the drain when everything goes to he!l in a hand basket within the matter of a minute! If you're a second time plus mom, you all know what I am talking about!
Reading some of these very judgy FTM posts are starting to p!ss me off. You don't know until you've been there!
Preach on!! I was an awesome parent until I actually became one.

Isn't everyone?! Until you have kids, then you know better! haha

PhoxySteph · October 2011

kcvasquez:

Okay, I didn't have one until now. I cannot stand when FTM's use the words, I will never....or my child will not....Really?! You don't have a child and trust me you will be choking on your words a year from now. It's nice to think that you have the perfect plan on how to raise your child, for now. Keep those rainbows and unicorns going as long as you can I guess because until that baby is in your arms you have no idea how you will actually raise your child. Sorry, you just don't. We've all been there, I used to think "OMG, my children will never eat McDonald's, never sleep in a carrier, never hold their own bottle." Blah, blah, blah. It all goes down the drain when everything goes to he!l in a hand basket within the matter of a minute! If you're a second time plus mom, you all know what I am talking about!

Reading some of these very judgy FTM posts are starting to p!ss me off. You don't know until you've been there!

firegirle1 · October 2011

PhoxySteph:
kcvasquez:

Okay, I didn't have one until now. I cannot stand when FTM's use the words, I will never....or my child will not....Really?! You don't have a child and trust me you will be choking on your words a year from now. It's nice to think that you have the perfect plan on how to raise your child, for now. Keep those rainbows and unicorns going as long as you can I guess because until that baby is in your arms you have no idea how you will actually raise your child. Sorry, you just don't. We've all been there, I used to think "OMG, my children will never eat McDonald's, never sleep in a carrier, never hold their own bottle." Blah, blah, blah. It all goes down the drain when everything goes to he!l in a hand basket within the matter of a minute! If you're a second time plus mom, you all know what I am talking about!

Reading some of these very judgy FTM posts are starting to p!ss me off. You don't know until you've been there!

I am a FM and I agree. I mean short of I will never give my child crack or let her jump out of the 4th floor window I really don't know. There are tons of things i will TRY not to do though. I guess I'll find out for sure soon.

firegirle1 · October 2011

PhoxySteph:
kcvasquez:

Okay, I didn't have one until now. I cannot stand when FTM's use the words, I will never....or my child will not....Really?! You don't have a child and trust me you will be choking on your words a year from now. It's nice to think that you have the perfect plan on how to raise your child, for now. Keep those rainbows and unicorns going as long as you can I guess because until that baby is in your arms you have no idea how you will actually raise your child. Sorry, you just don't. We've all been there, I used to think "OMG, my children will never eat McDonald's, never sleep in a carrier, never hold their own bottle." Blah, blah, blah. It all goes down the drain when everything goes to he!l in a hand basket within the matter of a minute! If you're a second time plus mom, you all know what I am talking about!

Reading some of these very judgy FTM posts are starting to p!ss me off. You don't know until you've been there!

I am a FM and I agree. I mean short of I will never give my child crack or let her jump out of the 4th floor window I really don't know. There are tons of things i will TRY not to do though. I guess I'll find out for sure soon.

laceyann2008 · October 2011

firegirle1:
PhoxySteph:
kcvasquez:

Okay, I didn't have one until now. I cannot stand when FTM's use the words, I will never....or my child will not....Really?! You don't have a child and trust me you will be choking on your words a year from now. It's nice to think that you have the perfect plan on how to raise your child, for now. Keep those rainbows and unicorns going as long as you can I guess because until that baby is in your arms you have no idea how you will actually raise your child. Sorry, you just don't. We've all been there, I used to think "OMG, my children will never eat McDonald's, never sleep in a carrier, never hold their own bottle." Blah, blah, blah. It all goes down the drain when everything goes to he!l in a hand basket within the matter of a minute! If you're a second time plus mom, you all know what I am talking about!

Reading some of these very judgy FTM posts are starting to p!ss me off. You don't know until you've been there!

I am a FM and I agree. I mean short of I will never give my child crack or let her jump out of the 4th floor window I really don't know. There are tons of things i will TRY not to do though. I guess I'll find out for sure soon.

hahahaha! But really, exactly what you said. We just can't know which rules we are telling ourselves are going to stick and which are going to get thrown out the window within 5 minutes and thankfully, I'm humble enough to realize I don't know half as much about parenting as I'd like to think I do!

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