Un/Popular Opinions

GoldenPeaches · October 2011

My unpopular opinion: people going under the speed limit don't bother me, especially when the weather is inclement. It has been raining here lately and I saw countless facebook statuses about "It's just rain people, drive faster!"

I'd much rather everyone on the road be driving a speed at which they feel comfortable and in control of their vehicle than reaching for a set number. A speed limit is just that--a limit. An upper amount you are allowed to go. With that said, I do feel that going TOO far under the limit is more dangerous than going close to the limit. 10-15 MPH under is acceptable in my book when not on the interstate. Interstates also change my opinion, but that's why I never drive on an interstate highway.

I'm one of those drivers that 90% of people hate. I follow every traffic law to a T and don't speed. Usually I go 5-8 under to make sure I don't speed. It's just not worth it to me and I am never in a rush.

CountingUp · October 2011

GoldenPeaches:

I'm one of those drivers that 90% of people hate. I follow every traffic law to a T and don't speed. Usually I go 5-8 under to make sure I don't speed. It's just not worth it to me and I am never in a rush.

This is how I drive too. I don't get honked at so I must not be all that annoying!

My contribution is

*people who feel the need to prepare me for the worst. I am nearly 37 and very aware that not all babies are born healthy. I know that breastfeeding will be a lot of work at first. I don't need to hear how your who-ha looked like it had gone through a meat grinder

mintyblue02 · October 2011

I hate that people throw around the phrase that being a SAHM is a "luxury". Um, I didn't just wake up one day and say to myself, "I don't feel like working anymore so I won't." Deciding to be a SAHM isn't some extravagant self-indulgence.

I planned out the last ten years of my life, worked extremely hard, saved our money and DH and I gave up some personal goals in order to do this.

Giving up my income is not luxurious. Spending all day feeding and changing diapers and trying to calm my child without any breaks or help instead of spending the day at a clean, orderly desk with a nice hour lunch break is not luxurious. Putting my career aspirations on hold for a few more years is not luxurious.

So please tell me what defines my decision to be a SAHM as a luxury?

getnmarried910 · October 2011

mintyblue02:

I hate that people throw around the phrase that being a SAHM is a "luxury". Um, I didn't just wake up one day and say to myself, "I don't feel like working anymore so I won't." Deciding to be a SAHM isn't some extravagant self-indulgence.

I planned out the last ten years of my life, worked extremely hard, saved our money and DH and I gave up some personal goals in order to do this.

Giving up my income is not luxurious. Spending all day feeding and changing diapers and trying to calm my child without any breaks or help instead of spending the day at a clean, orderly desk with a nice hour lunch break is not luxurious. Putting my career aspirations on hold for a few more years is not luxurious.

So please tell me what defines my decision to be a SAHM as a luxury?

I'd like to know the answer to this as well. People seem to think because I'm a SAHM, I have all this extra time. I get about an hour and a half a day to myself...naptime. Sometimes I don't even get that. I'm happy if I manage to squeeze a shower in by the end of the day!

Ricola · October 2011

mintyblue02:
So please tell me what defines my decision to be a SAHM as a luxury?

I think what people mean when they say this is that it is a luxury to actually be able to make the choice to become a SAHM. Some people work their asses off but still don't make enough money to be able to afford one of the parents to stay at home with the kids.

I do see it as a luxury to be able to become a SAHM for that reason. We also saved up for this for quite a while and live within our means, but I still had the choice to do this while others just don't.

sarakiefer · October 2011

haleymay18:
getnmarried910:

I think if you are incapable of driving the 35 mph speed limit that everywhere around town (like the old people going 20 mph, not exaggerating in the least), you shouldn't be driving. Going that much under the speed limit is a hazard to those around you. 35mph is pretty slow. I hate that my dad says it's because older people aren't in a rush for anything. I don't care. Just because you don't care if it takes you forever to get somewhere doesn't mean the rest of us want to get stuck behind you. I am not necessarily in a rush, but would like to get places in a timely manner, and somehow, I ALWAYS get stuck behind the slow people. I change lanes and get stuck behind another slow person. I swear there is a sign on my car that only I can't see and it says, "Get in front of me and go as slow as possible."

I also get really annoyed with the intactivists that are really pushy. I think it's great if you dont' want to circ your son, great, but let others make their own decisions. I hate that there is a petition going to Washington to make circumcision illegal. It's not the governments job to decide this for anyone.

Oh, and I like the cold weather. I'm glad it's only 45 degrees outside. I will take cold and snow over 90+ degrees any day!

I feel the same with circ's as I do with abortion. Do it or don't do it but keep the law away from my choices.

I agree with this to a certain point. I guess this might be my UO, but abortion in my eyes is murder. Once something has a heartbeat, it's alive. I heard my LO's HB at 6 weeks. Unless we want to make it legal to kill people outside of the womb, then abortion shouldn't be legal. Idc if the person is in the womb or not, it is still a person. Now vaccines, circs, etc. shouldn't be left up for the government to decide. But those issues are in a completely different ballpark than murder.

MesmrEwe · October 2011

My UO:

1) The OWS protesters are about as misguided as it gets about how the world works or what brought about the problem in the first place, it wasn't "big business" that caused the problem when things are traced back to their source (the bailouts are merely a coverup because no one that is in power wants to face the real issue that was going to surface if these big banks had been allowed to "fail" - even if by every capitalistic definition they should have been allowed to do, nor do the people who made irresposible choices in taking out loans they couldn't afford on a "rainy day" want to be told "YOU also messed up and need to be financially responsible for it!"). Remember, every "big business" started out as a "little guy" who put it all on the line at one point or another.. Also, what bugs me - how the OWS people aren't turning the protest on "big business" over to sports teams like the Vikings who want the taxpayers to pay for a brand new stadium for them to play a privately owned business.

2) That there is even a debate/argument on the whole "unmedicated" vs. "medicated" delivery lately, every mom wants to go unmedicated and have a 3hr. L&D but that's not the case for many women and in some cases being so staunchly set on having one or the other can actually cause more complications to arise. Complications in L&D happen in spite of having the healthiest PG on the planet and stats are useless on this because you aren't taking the same population of women and putting them through the same L&D and having them deliver at a rotation of hospitals. As my dev. psych prof once put it, "All births are natural unless the baby comes out of your mouth" from there, stop stressing or thinking your decision is superior over the other way!

sarakiefer · October 2011

Ricola:
mintyblue02:

So please tell me what defines my decision to be a SAHM as a luxury?

I think what people mean when they say this is that it is a luxury to actually be able to make the choice to become a SAHM. Some people work their asses off but still don't make enough money to be able to afford one of the parents to stay at home with the kids.

I do see it as a luxury to be able to become a SAHM for that reason. We also saved up for this for quite a while and live within our means, but I still had the choice to do this while others just don't.

This. I have no doubt it's hard work and extremely exhausting. But I would LOVE to be able to stay at home with my LO full time than be at work away from him full time.

heuy · October 2011

Ricola:
I have another one:
You know that story that everybody is linking right now about the couple that dies holding hands after 72 years of marriage and how sweet this is?
I actually think it is not sweet at all. This old man was driving even though his license was about to be revoked (so he knew that he officially should not be driving anymore), he caused an accident and the lady who was so unlucky to be in the other car is now in the ICU with internal bleeding and a broken neck. What's sweet about that?

This happened in my town. While I completely agree with you that the old man shouldn't have been behind the wheel--the bittersweet part for me is the death within an hour of each other.

lintscreen · October 2011

heatherom:

I'm beginning to think I really don't like other people's children. In fact, the only child I can think of that I like is one of my college friend's daughter who is 3 years old. This little girl was just the sweetest thing - even when she was having a temper tantrum it was mild and even kinda cute. All other children, including my own nieces (save for one, who is 13 years old now) I just can't stand them. I guess I'm a grouch? I don't know. I don't know many other children so I guess maybe my exposure has just been limited.

This is kinda nagging at me because what if I can't stand my own kid? I'm not much of a kid person and I can't stand screaming, hyperactive, whining kids. Going to a Mcdonald's playground is like having to visit Hell. I don't fawn over other people's children like some women I know do. I'm not tempted to go up to someone's baby and make faces at them, or want to hold them. First off, I think that's just kinda freaky for a total stranger to do. Secondly, I don't want to scare the poor child either.

So yeah - I'm a non-kid kinda person having a baby and it does kinda worry me that I won't be the best mom because of that. Doesn't mean I want to have my baby any less or not inform myself about parenting techniques, etc. I'm just wondering if my patience will give out faster.

I'm the same way. I am told that once you have your own, it's totally different. We'll see.

mintyblue02 · October 2011

sarakiefer:
Ricola:
mintyblue02:

So please tell me what defines my decision to be a SAHM as a luxury?

I think what people mean when they say this is that it is a luxury to actually be able to make the choice to become a SAHM. Some people work their asses off but still don't make enough money to be able to afford one of the parents to stay at home with the kids.

I do see it as a luxury to be able to become a SAHM for that reason. We also saved up for this for quite a while and live within our means, but I still had the choice to do this while others just don't.

This. I have no doubt it's hard work and extremely exhausting. But I would LOVE to be able to stay at home with my LO full time than be at work away from him full time.

I can completely understand that. But I think the word "luxury" implies a type of lifestyle that is indulgent, comfortable or leisurely. Unless you are a SAHM with a full time nanny or something, I just don't see how that word correlates.

Unless you are a single parent, everyone has the choice whether to work or not. Yes, you may have to drastically change your lifestyle to fit into a smaller budget, which may have you living in a trailer (which I am not saying you should do), but it can be done and is not something that is completely impossible.

It's just a choice we all have to make. I don't see the luxury in it.

KellyAnn911 · October 2011

I hate it when it's pouring outside and people don't put on their headlights. It's usually people in silver cars. The one color that blends in with the weather. Hello, I can't see you coming. What is so hard about putting on your lights when you turn on your wipers.

I should invent headlights that turn on automatically when you turn your wipers on. Someone probably already invented it. I'm always late with good inventions.

Oh, and 1 more UO. It annoys me when people say or type "prolly" like it's an actual word. Are you really that stupid? The word you are looking for is PROBABLY.

JennyLiz75 · October 2011

mirandagc91:
It really bothers me when I go out of my way to do something nice for somebody and they don't say thank you, especially when they asked for help in the first place.

Yep, happens to me all the time. I keep saying I've learned and I'm not gonna let it happen again....but I just can't say no.

My Unpopular opinion is...

Get your lazy butt outta the car and go knock on the door instead of sitting out in front of someone's house honking your horn at 6am or any other time for that matter.

My neighbor is the worst!! She gets in her car...pulls out of the garage and sits in the driveway honking for her kids over and over. Makes me CRAZY!

robynlynn83 · October 2011

I think the Tea Party is about as "misguided" as the current protest group...and I actually think it's funny that the Tea Party is upset that this new far to the other side group is now in existence....

Rick Perry makes me want to jump off a cliff--that's all on that one.

I always forget how much I hate the "You look ready to have a baby" comments....I get it, I look uncomfortable--I AM uncomfortable but you are just telling me that I look like $hit, thanks.

Ayreka · October 2011

kylayton:
I've had a few women tell me recently, "Recovery after delivery is the WORST! It's so painful!" As if I wasn't already nervous enough. People should give new moms encouragement. Unless I ASK you how terrible recovery was, please don't tell me.

Ugh people are dumb. My recovery was seriously no big deal. I barely bled past the first 24 hours and although my episiotomy was sore it was bearable and I was ready to get on with my new life. It's all about how you look at it. I'm sure you will do great!

Ayreka · October 2011

I'm late to the game today but I have one. I don't care how you give birth to your child but I really want to shake people that are so dead set on a natural birth that accomplishing that becomes their goal instead of delivering their baby safely. Doctors are not evil surgery pushers that are looking for a way to make a few more dollars with every delivery. If they tell you you NEED to do something they probably have a good reason for it. I know there are a few exceptions to this and some crappy docs out there but for the most part they are very well educated and know what they are doing. Case in point when I was on the bump while pregnant with DS there was a woman who was so dead set on her natural delivery that she refused interventions of any kind when her doc was telling her that she needed them. Her DS was born with shoulder dysplasia (sp?) that was pretty severe because of it. If she had just quit being so darn stubborn and thinking that reading a few books and medical papers made her a doctor her child would have been born just fine.

JMC11511 · October 2011

mintyblue02:
sarakiefer:
Ricola:
mintyblue02:

So please tell me what defines my decision to be a SAHM as a luxury?

I think what people mean when they say this is that it is a luxury to actually be able to make the choice to become a SAHM. Some people work their asses off but still don't make enough money to be able to afford one of the parents to stay at home with the kids.

I do see it as a luxury to be able to become a SAHM for that reason. We also saved up for this for quite a while and live within our means, but I still had the choice to do this while others just don't.

This. I have no doubt it's hard work and extremely exhausting. But I would LOVE to be able to stay at home with my LO full time than be at work away from him full time.

I can completely understand that. But I think the word "luxury" implies a type of lifestyle that is indulgent, comfortable or leisurely. Unless you are a SAHM with a full time nanny or something, I just don't see how that word correlates.

Unless you are a single parent, everyone has the choice whether to work or not. Yes, you may have to drastically change your lifestyle to fit into a smaller budget, which may have you living in a trailer (which I am not saying you should do), but it can be done and is not something that is completely impossible.

It's just a choice we all have to make. I don't see the luxury in it.

I was just thinking about this. I'm expecting my first and DH and I planned/saved for me to stay at home when we got engaged. I realize not everyone is in a financial position to do that, or that they choose to work outside the home for personal reasons, but I don't like it when people tell me I'm "lucky" to be able to stay home. I don't consider it luck, I consider it good planning. I DO consider myself blessed/fortunate to have a husband who is 100% supportive of this decision and is willing to work hard to provide financially for our family.

Another UO: I'm convinced that Jr. High/Middle School is the 5th level of Hell-oh.

Fletcha · October 2011

Ayreka:

I'm late to the game today but I have one. I don't care how you give birth to your child but I really want to shake people that are so dead set on a natural birth that accomplishing that becomes their goal instead of delivering their baby safely. Doctors are not evil surgery pushers that are looking for a way to make a few more dollars with every delivery. If they tell you you NEED to do something they probably have a good reason for it. I know there are a few exceptions to this and some crappy docs out there but for the most part they are very well educated and know what they are doing. Case in point when I was on the bump while pregnant with DS there was a woman who was so dead set on her natural delivery that she refused interventions of any kind when her doc was telling her that she needed them. Her DS was born with shoulder dysplasia (sp?) that was pretty severe because of it. If she had just quit being so darn stubborn and thinking that reading a few books and medical papers made her a doctor her child would have been born just fine.

I guess my U/O would be that I think it's an asinine assumption that most women "set" on having a natural birth are doing so at all costs and are all anti-medicine or anti-necessary intervention... I understand you have an "example", but honestly, there are crazies who take it to the extreme in every bunch. And I think you meant she had shoulder dystocia, which is not "preventable" by any intervention, it just happens to some babies regardless of birth method. So not sure why her being determined to go natural had anything to do with it happening or made her think she was a doctor because she had done her research. But, if she refused the measures needed to get her baby unstuck, then yes, she is crazy. I kind of doubt that, though.

You are right about most doctors not being evil or money-grubbers and I doubt most going for a natural birth really think that. However, OB's are trained surgeons with most of their experience in high-risk, high-intervention births. And overall, the numbers and statistics on birth in this country indicate an unnecessarily high rate of interventions that in some cases, are pre-mature or totally unnecessary. There are a lot of different factors for this, but overall, it is troubling. We have worse outcomes than most other countries with comparable factors.

I personally don't view birth as a complication waiting to happen, therefore I have chosen a caregiver who also view births as a normal, natural process and only will take action when there is a true medical need. She is an expert on natural, drug-free, low-intervention birth and has fantastic statistics. I am also doing as much research as possible in order to be more knowledgeable about what might happen and when interventions are truly necessary as well as what to expect in labor. To me, knowledge is power and makes me feel more at ease and informed about the whole process. It doesn't mean I think I'm a doctor or any kind of expert, but I will at least be able to advocate for myself and ask questions if I ever think something may not be right or necessary. I.E. if a nurse at my hospital automatically pushes Pit if I don't progress fast enough for their timeframe, refusing cervix checks, etc.

haleymay18 · October 2011

Ayreka:

I'm late to the game today but I have one. I don't care how you give birth to your child but I really want to shake people that are so dead set on a natural birth that accomplishing that becomes their goal instead of delivering their baby safely. Doctors are not evil surgery pushers that are looking for a way to make a few more dollars with every delivery. If they tell you you NEED to do something they probably have a good reason for it. I know there are a few exceptions to this and some crappy docs out there but for the most part they are very well educated and know what they are doing. Case in point when I was on the bump while pregnant with DS there was a woman who was so dead set on her natural delivery that she refused interventions of any kind when her doc was telling her that she needed them. Her DS was born with shoulder dysplasia (sp?) that was pretty severe because of it. If she had just quit being so darn stubborn and thinking that reading a few books and medical papers made her a doctor her child would have been born just fine.

Your ignorance astounds me. Women who have decided to pass up unnecessary interventions do not do so at the sake of their health or their unborn childs. I am DEAD SET on having a home birth. If something were to happen (very unlikely but not impossible) such as a hemorrage, consistently slow heartbeat, blood pressure, baby difficulties, etc. than any reasonable woman would make the choice to do what is best for their child and themselves. That is basic survival. But I will not allow interventions because I feel my labor is slow or because I am measuring big or whatever other bullshitt reason I may be given.

FTR, you should really do some research regarding shoulder dystocia. It is not preventable or predictable. By the time it starts to occur (when the shoulder gets stuck) it is usually FAR too late that a c/s could help it. But I think it is totally awesome that you can place blame on this mother and act like her stubborness caused this. Puhlease.

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