Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: waaahhhh!! (vent)
I could have written your post.
I don't have any words of wisdom, but I agree it's really stressful to have that little clock ticking in the back of your mind! I guess we should both keep reminding ourselves that we still have plenty of time before 41 weeks!
I haven't had anything quite so long as 2.5 hours of contractions yet, but an hour here and there and I just start to think they might be real contractions and they stop. I didn't want it to be full on labor yet, since I'm only 36 weeks, but I think the most frustrating thing to me was when I was checked at my appt, I'm still closed up tight.... not even a smidgen of progress! I'm pretty sure my body has no idea how to dilate on its own.
Aw, hang in there. Which is so much easier said than done.
That's a really good sign if you're having contractions at night! And this isn't the same pregnancy or labor as your first! You have weeks and weeks left, so try not to worry too much about going late, also. I totally lose my mind by about week 38-39 of pregnancy (I went into labor at 41 weeks with DS1, and probably closer to 42 weeks with DS2). It's the hardest part of pregnancy, I think...
Have you thought about pushing back on the 41-week limit? It's within reason to request non-stress tests past 41 weeks, or seeing if your provider would be willing to do some sort of induction method that's okay with VBAC (I think Cytotec/Cervidil are the big ones to avoid?). Forgive me if this has been brought up before!
DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)
Ah, that sounds like a good plan! Seriously, hang in there. It's so, so hard with the added stress of all the baggage that comes with a VBAC. Be kind to yourself!!
DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)
Hang in there! It's a great sign that you are having conractions. Your body is working and you can do this. I've been there. I've doubted myself big time (induced at 42 weeks with #1). I had no progress at the my last appt before my VBAC (39w4days) and hadn't felt anything. Finally at 40w1day I started having contractions and thought maybe labor was beginning. However, on the morning of 41 weeks my water broke in the middle of the night. I just wanted to share that with you to give you hope. I did not know anyone but ONE person (an aquaintance) who had a VBAC so no one understood my desire (everyone around here just has another c/s). It can make you feel very alone and like you are making the wrong choice. I just always reminded myself that I pretty much had just the same chance of having a vaginal birth as a first time mother, statistically speaking. Good luck!
I totally understand the frustration of waiting indefinitely at the end. Although I am not in your situation YET, I will be going for a VBAC when I get pregnant again.
Waiting for contractions in the last few weeks of pregnancy was hard enough the first time. I cannot imagine how tough it will be the second time!