waaahhhh!! (vent)

manbearpig31610

Sorry, this is a vent. I feel like I'm going to lose it. This whole end of pregnancy thing sucks so unbelievably bad when you thow in the extra stress of being a vbac. Last night I woke up at 4am with contractions. Not just the tightening feeling of BH but actual (mildly) painful period-like cramping. It started in my belly and spread to my back and hips. I got up and waddled around the house, got some water and they were still coming. Didn't want to wake up the rest of the family so decided just to hang out a couple hours and put on tv and see what happened. They continued to come and were regular (every 5-6 min at first) but they started to slow after a while (first to 8 min, then 10) and eventually stopped (after 2.5 hours). I stayed up for a while longer before I accepted that they were done, then went back to bed. I never honestly believed it was the real thing but I was really hoping it might progress in to something more. In the end, I think the most frustrating thing is that I don't know if all that was for nothing. I suspect it was. I never lost my MP or had any other signs of things progressing (they never increased in intensity either). I hate this feeling of being on the clock (I can only go to 41 weeks and no pitocin) and I feel like it's just messing with my head when stuff like this happens. Sorry to be so whiney. I don't know anyone IRL who has attempted to vbac and thought some of the ladies here may be able to relate to my frustration. The end has just been really hard for me.

manbearpig31610

I know I'm just at the beginning of the end and there's still pleanty of time. I just hate not knowing when (or if) my body will decide to do it's thing (I was induced with DD). Some days I just doubt my body's ability and I know that does me no good but it's hard to move past.

NicoleR524

I'm not in your position yet but I can appreciate the feeling.  I doubt my body's ability as well since I was 42 weeks and didn't go into labor.  I had a few hours of mild contractions one day but it didn't turn into anything.  I felt the same way as you describe above and am anxious about next time.  It's going to be very hard to stay calm and present in the moment when I all I will be waiting for is labor to start.  I wish you lots of luck on your journey.  

myantonia

I could have written your post.  I don't have any words of wisdom, but I agree it's really stressful to have that little clock ticking in the back of your mind!  I guess we should both keep reminding ourselves that we still have plenty of time before 41 weeks!

 

I haven't had anything quite so long as 2.5 hours of contractions yet, but an hour here and there and I just start to think they might be real contractions and they stop.  I didn't want it to be full on labor yet, since I'm only 36 weeks, but I think the most frustrating thing to me was when I was checked at my appt, I'm still closed up tight.... not even a smidgen of progress!  I'm pretty sure my body has no idea how to dilate on its own.

nosoup4u

Aw, hang in there. Which is so much easier said than done.
That's a really good sign if you're having contractions at night! And this isn't the same pregnancy or labor as your first! You have weeks and weeks left, so try not to worry too much about going late, also. I totally lose my mind by about week 38-39 of pregnancy (I went into labor at 41 weeks with DS1, and probably closer to 42 weeks with DS2). It's the hardest part of pregnancy, I think...

Have you thought about pushing back on the 41-week limit? It's within reason to request non-stress tests past 41 weeks, or seeing if your provider would be willing to do some sort of induction method that's okay with VBAC (I think Cytotec/Cervidil are the big ones to avoid?). Forgive me if this has been brought up before!

manbearpig31610

nosoup4u:

Aw, hang in there. Which is so much easier said than done.
That's a really good sign if you're having contractions at night! And this isn't the same pregnancy or labor as your first! You have weeks and weeks left, so try not to worry too much about going late, also. I totally lose my mind by about week 38-39 of pregnancy (I went into labor at 41 weeks with DS1, and probably closer to 42 weeks with DS2). It's the hardest part of pregnancy, I think...

Have you thought about pushing back on the 41-week limit? It's within reason to request non-stress tests past 41 weeks, or seeing if your provider would be willing to do some sort of induction method that's okay with VBAC (I think Cytotec/Cervidil are the big ones to avoid?). Forgive me if this has been brought up before!

If I make it to 41 weeks I plan to ask for more time. My OB has been so supportive and said we could try some induction techniques when I start having some progress (they just won't do pitocin). My cervix had no progress at 36 weeks and they don't check again until 39 weeks. So, if at that point I have not gone in to labor but I have at least some progress she will sweep my membranes and we'll talk about other options. She has said that if I make it to 41 weeks with no progress she will recommend a rcs. If we get to that point, I plan to ask if they will let me schedule it for week 42 so I can buy myself a bit more time.

manbearpig31610

myantonia:

I could have written your post.  I don't have any words of wisdom, but I agree it's really stressful to have that little clock ticking in the back of your mind!  I guess we should both keep reminding ourselves that we still have plenty of time before 41 weeks!

 

I haven't had anything quite so long as 2.5 hours of contractions yet, but an hour here and there and I just start to think they might be real contractions and they stop.  I didn't want it to be full on labor yet, since I'm only 36 weeks, but I think the most frustrating thing to me was when I was checked at my appt, I'm still closed up tight.... not even a smidgen of progress!  I'm pretty sure my body has no idea how to dilate on its own.

I had no progress at 36 weeks either. Boo! I have not been checked since and they don't check again until 39 weeks. I kinda want to ask them to check me at my appt on Wednesday but it's probably better that I don't. It will just give me something else to obsess over. I just need to buck up and hang in there. Thanks for your sympathy. Good luck to you and I hope things get going for both of us soon!

GMR811

I am EXACTLY with you. Checked last week at 37 weeks, not dilated.  I have been having instances of contractions with cramping and low back pressure and then it just stops. I have no problem with her cooking as long as she needs but wish I knew I would go into labor before my scheduled RCS at 41 weeks.  I can't be induced either and if I make it past 40 I plan to ask for 42 as well to buy some time.  I feel so much pressure and anxiety being against the clock.  With DS I had an emergent c section at 35 weeks due to fetal distress, was having contractions and water broke on the way to the OR.  I have no idea what its like to fight out the last few weeks, nevermind with a VBAC situation.  If I knew I would go into labor before 41 weeks I would relax so much more. I so know how you feel.

nosoup4u

manbearpig31610:

If I make it to 41 weeks I plan to ask for more time. My OB has been so supportive and said we could try some induction techniques when I start having some progress (they just won't do pitocin). My cervix had no progress at 36 weeks and they don't check again until 39 weeks. So, if at that point I have not gone in to labor but I have at least some progress she will sweep my membranes and we'll talk about other options. She has said that if I make it to 41 weeks with no progress she will recommend a rcs. If we get to that point, I plan to ask if they will let me schedule it for week 42 so I can buy myself a bit more time.

Ah, that sounds like a good plan! Seriously, hang in there. It's so, so hard with the added stress of all the baggage that comes with a VBAC. Be kind to yourself!!

blf722

Hang in there!  It's a great sign that you are having conractions.  Your body is working and you can do this.  I've been there.  I've doubted myself big time (induced at 42 weeks with #1).  I had no progress at the my last appt before my VBAC (39w4days) and hadn't felt anything.  Finally at 40w1day I started having contractions and thought maybe labor was beginning.  However, on the morning of 41 weeks my water broke in the middle of the night.  I just wanted to share that with you to give you hope.  I did not know anyone but ONE person (an aquaintance) who had a VBAC so no one understood my desire (everyone around here just has another c/s).  It can make you feel very alone and like you are making the wrong choice.  I just always reminded myself that I pretty much had just the same chance of having a vaginal birth as a first time mother, statistically speaking.  Good luck!

 

je2161

I totally understand the frustration of waiting indefinitely at the end. Although I am not in your situation YET, I will be going for a VBAC when I get pregnant again.

Waiting for contractions in the last few weeks of pregnancy was hard enough the first time. I cannot imagine how tough it will be the second time!

katiebug66

I so needed to read this because I am right there with you. Today I feel like crap and knowing if I was doing a rcs that this would all be over in a week is so tempting. We can do it!