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Attachment Parenting
BFP 02/04/2011;EDD 10/14/2011;Induced due to pre-e 09/07/2011;Jack born 09/08/2011
Baby TOO attached?!
I posted before here looking for sleep tips and I appreciated the advice I got and am so glad to have found a board with some similarly-minded moms on it. We have a new problem though. I babywear and love that I've gotten over my fear of co-sleeping and it's working really well for us (minus my husband having to sleep in another room but we're doing this as a temporary solution until baby adjusts more); however, last Sunday Jack decided that he had to be held all the time. We can't put him down....EVER. It's not just his bassinet either since we've tried putting him in his pretty much unused crib or setting him on a playmat and he just flips out. I can't even go to the bathroom without him screaming bloody murder since I had to put him down for 2 minutes. We're getting a swing next week in hopes he might take to that, but I was wondering if anyone else had any more advice. I love being near my baby, but I can't get anything done because even wearing him, my activities are somewhat limited (can't bend over a lot, etc.). I have to wait each day for DH to get home so I can put dishes in the dishwasher, make dinner, or do laundry.
BFP 02/04/2011;EDD 10/14/2011;Induced due to pre-e 09/07/2011;Jack born 09/08/2011
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Re: Baby TOO attached?!
I had to learn to squat. The only things I didn't do while wearing DD were cooking and cleaning the litter boxes. Laundry and dishes were never a problem. You may also want to look into a back carry which I never mastered, but others do. DD doesn't get worn on a regular basis much anymore since she prefers to crawl around after me while I do things,so I promise you do get some freedom eventually!
ETA: And yeah, I wore DD to the bathroom most of the time until she was about 4 months old.
How old is he?
Have you tried putting him down when you're going to stay close? Maybe prop him up in a Boppy or something and stay right there, talking to him, playing with him....stay close, touch him, but don't hold him. Get him used to being close to you but not IN your arms. As he gets used to that, try out the swing. Stay close at first but test him by moving away, etc. Work up to being able to use the bathroom and hopefully he'll eventually be ok being in a swing watching you while you cook or do stuff around the house.
GL!
love is for every her, love is for every him, love is for everyone
Might be just a phase. DD is VERY attached, but she would go through stages where she needed me much more for days or weeks at a time. Teething, growth spurt, or who knows what?? Honestly I know how frustrating it can be when it takes three days to do a single load of laundry because you can't put your baby down for long enough to get through each step.
GL
Is your baby very young? If so, that sounds normal. I second learning to bend or doing a back carry. If your baby is a newborn, I encourage you to take it easy and let the house and chores be and just snuggle with that baby! Those days are short and so sweet. Even if you baby is older and having separation anxiety, that sounds normal. Back carries are a saving grace! It is normal and healthy for a helpless little being to need constant physical connection with a person. By meeting baby's need in this way now, it will filled and then will pass. AP is about balance and it is ok to put your baby down in the ways you are talking about if it helps meet your needs, but don't feel like you need to put baby down for fear of "spoling" or being too attached. All of this sounds very developmentally appropriate.
More Green For Less Green
DD born 6.13.11 at 37w5d
DS born 5.23.12 at 36w5d
BFP 6.9.13|heartbeat of 128bpm 7weeks|7.23.13 ultrasound revealed no heartbeat|natural m/c and d&c 7.25.13
DS born 5.20.14 at 38 weeks
All are welcome
My experience is very similar.
OP- I know what you mean about the meals. Have your partner or a friend or family member hold LO sometimes so you can eat; that used to feel so luxurious! Now it is much more normal. Like chrismo said, a few weeks ago LO started being more content sitting in her rocker with some toys while I made dinner, or ate lunch, or threw in a few loads of laundry. It will get easier! And, yeah, the squatting is actually quite helpful for getting back into shape, ha ha. My legs are crazy strong now!
It took my daughter about 2 months to be able to be put down and she is 10 months now and thriving! I thought she would have major separation issues but she is in daycare and so happy!
It will all happen in due time. Just be patient. To be honest, I miss those days and wish DD would be willing to let me cuddle her all day because now she just wants to crawl and explore! Thank goodness for BFing and bedsharing, so we can cuddle!!!!