Does TTC weird your SO out?

gplove94 · October 2011

So I try not to talk too much about TTC w/ MH. We talk about it sometimes, but nothing "technical." So yesterday I was in the bathroom comparing my morning's almost positive OPK to my later in the day's clear negative. He came in and said "what is that?!" thinking it was a pregnancy test (he has no idea how fertility works clearly) So I explained the LH and OPKs and he then seemed weirded out. Later on when I tried to initiate sex he was not into it and fell asleep early. I was annoyed. I think I freaked him out. Any experiences to share?

kristykay123 · October 2011

I haven't started using them yet (have ordered them from wondfo) but can totally see MH thinking it was a posative PG test. I don't think he even knows what an OPK is. He looked at my BB thermometer and asked if I felt sick lol.

Maybe he was more let down by thinking you were pg and not really freaked out?

gplove94 · October 2011

kristykay123:
I haven't started using them yet (have ordered them from wondfo) but can totally see MH thinking it was a posative PG test. I don't think he even knows what an OPK is. He looked at my BB thermometer and asked if I felt sick lol.

Maybe he was more let down by thinking you were pg and not really freaked out?

Hmmm didn't think about that. Possibility.

alekkie · October 2011

I can relate...my SO has never actually been 'weirded out', but if I start going into too much detail, I can see his eyes roll back in his head in attempt to stay awake. I just think it's funny how us women spend so much time stressing, counting, analyzing, researching, and they just get to have sex and then enjoy the baby when it comes LOL

I also think if you talk about it too much with him, he will start viewing himself as a sperm bank instead of your SO...

My advice would be to just do what you're doing and not share the technicalities w. him unless he opens up to you about it. Personally, during my fertile periods, instead of saying 'I'm ovulating, we need to have sex', I just initiate sex a lot. Instead of him viewing it as 'something we have to do now' he views it as a turn-on. I think half the time he doesn't even realize that I am TOTALLY not in the mood, but that I am expecting ovulation so that's why we are even having sex in the first place. LOL...good luck hang in there, and I've learned to just not let him get the best of me...so many times I've felt like this is something I want desperately and he's just like 'eh, ok, whatever'...but that's really not the case...men and women are just 2 completely different species (:

sweetgotham · October 2011

I was on chat last week and MH came over and read over a little over my shoulder and they said, very suggestively, "Wanna show me your chart" and starts trailing his fingers along my back....so I get off chat and log of everything thinking I am gonna get me some and...oh, he actually wanted to see my chart /facepalm. So I guess he is ?weird? the other way!

MH is pretty involved; he asks questions, likes to know what?s up with my cycle, and has started flipping through Expecting 411. I also found out yesterday that he talks to the woman who runs the lab where he is a fellow pretty regularly about TTC which actually kind of surprised me (she passes along advice so that I won't be discouraged, which is kind of sweet of her even though we have never meet). When I was getting ready for work I asked him what he was thinking because he sort of looked down and said ?pregnancy? (I had told him about my temp drop). Who knows how it might change, maybe he will get discouraged and not want to hear about it anymore but so far it has been nice to have someone who is interested in the more, ell, tedious aspects of TTC.

app1e3 · October 2011

My DH was freaked out the first few months when TTC #1. As time wore on, he became less and less so. He would often shoot me down when I tired to come onto him and I would then become annoyed, a little spat would ensue, etc. etc. It can be more of an emotional journey for us than for them but at least you're not bombarding him with TTC talk constantly.

GermanGirl2007 · October 2011

sweetgotham:

I was on chat last week and MH came over and read over a little over my shoulder and they said, very suggestively, "Wanna show me your chart" and starts trailing his fingers along my back....so I get off chat and log of everything thinking I am gonna get me some and...oh, he actually wanted to see my chart /facepalm. So I guess he is ?weird? the other way!

MH is pretty involved; he asks questions, likes to know what?s up with my cycle, and has started flipping through Expecting 411. I also found out yesterday that he talks to the woman who runs the lab where he is a fellow pretty regularly about TTC which actually kind of surprised me (she passes along advice so that I won't be discouraged, which is kind of sweet of her even though we have never meet). When I was getting ready for work I asked him what he was thinking because he sort of looked down and said ?pregnancy? (I had told him about my temp drop). Who knows how it might change, maybe he will get discouraged and not want to hear about it anymore but so far it has been nice to have someone who is interested in the more, ell, tedious aspects of TTC.

Bwahahahaha! That made me LOL. Yes

Karrotelle · October 2011

TTC doesn't weird my H out but I'm pretty sure if I talked to him about Cervical Mucus it would gross him out. He knows about everything else though. (OPK's, Temping, Charting etc). Some husbands prefer not to know what's going on while TTC, whereas others want to know all about it.

Maybe your H just isn't comfortable with the idea of using OPK's. Mine wasn't at first. He told me he thought it wasn't natural. Eventually he changed his mind but I had to sit and talk to him about it. I don't think there's anything wrong with your H not wanting to knwo all the details about it but I think you should sit down and talk to your H and make sure that's all it is and it's not that he's unsure about TTC.

GermanGirl2007 · October 2011

DH is so excited about it, and thanks to a Biology of Women class that he took in grad school, he knows all about the female reproductive system. It's pretty funny actually. He knows enough, that I don't feel the need to over-share. He's happy knowing what he does, and just getting extra sex each month. Wink

That said, the other night he gave me a hug and tried to reassure me that we would get pregnant soon. Despite all that he does know, I think he is truly surprised that it didn't happen quickly. We are on cycle 6, so it's not like its taking forever, but I guess it just goes to show that knowing about how to get pregnant, doesn't actually get you pregnant.

steffieful · October 2011

Yesterday I explained CM to MH. I think I should have just kept that to myself. He grew up with a family of mostly boys so he is completely weired out by anything like that!

tayray1 · October 2011

TTC does not seem to weird MH out. He's interested in the temping, and charting, and even chart stalks me sometimes which I think is cute. We just take time to focus on each other, and put each other first when it comes to sexy time. We also try to get out of the house and have some fun! We don't put too much pressure on ourselves which is good, b/c we've been trying for 14 months already!

celestialnyte · October 2011

MH gets weirded out on some things. He has a fertility calculator on his phone, so he can "predict" when I'm ovulating (it's actually surprisingly accurate). He knows a lot of what goes on, but I tried to talk to him about CM once, and I thought his eyes were going to fall out of his head they bugged out so much. I've learned to go right to that point, but not go past it.

gplove94 · October 2011

Thanks ladies. I think I'm just afraid he's going to give up even though most of the time I feel like he's into TTC then other times I feel like he might have traces of commitment-phobia. I'm being a crazy person today. I will not be telling him about my CM that would be TMI for him.

BKT22 · October 2011

I thought about using the OPK without telling my husband about it but felt like I was sneaking around behind his back. So I just let him know that I was curious about trying it out and he was really supportive. (But not super interested in looking at something with my pee on it). Maybe your husband would have liked to know you were doing the OPK. Maybe he wasn't "weirded out" but possibly felt "left out". I think a lot of men want to be more involved in TTC but just don't know how. Luckily my DH grew up in a house full of women so it's hard to freak him out.

LanaLewis · October 2011

the first month we started TTC, DH came home early and saw the bathroom with prenatal vitamins and an OPK box out. needless to say, i don't tell him about anything unless he asks about 'the egg test.' Men Confused

MissGOP · October 2011

My DH is a RN so he "gets" a lot more about how the body works than many men. In fact, he can frequently snap me into reality very easily if I complain of phantom symptoms. I mentioned CM once and that was the only thing that kind of grossed him out. Maybe he just didn't want to have that image in his head before sex.

kcblues97 · October 2011

My husband has done a complete 180! When we first started TTC, he was under the assumption that sex any time during my cycle would work. When I started charting, and bought a BBT & HPT's, he kept saying that I was stressing way too much. I would try to explain that no, we really didn't have all month to TTC, just a few shorts day. It wasn't until I came back from my first TTC OBGYN appt that he realized I was right. Now, he is constantly asking about what my chart says, and was my temp this morning... It's a huge relief knowing that's he has started to get involved.

numb3rMel · October 2011

This thread is so funny! Or ironic in my world because MH is so squirmy about anything medical so it came no surprise to me that getting pregnant sounds more like a fairy tale to him than science. If only right?

katekat8721 · October 2011

Not really, since we charted to avoid for so long MH is kind of used to hearing all the nitty gritty. I don't really share a lot with him though just because it's not super sexy to talk about how my cervix is positioned just right for sex that day.

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