Leaving kids in car?

blckwhtyllwgirl · October 2011

I got into a discussion with another mother this week on when, if ever, it is ok to leave children in the car. I was curious what you all thought. Is there ever a circumstance it's ok to leave them in car? For example, you forgot your wallet on the counter at Walgreens - do you take both kids out of the carseat to run in and grab it - or do you just run in? What about when you are pumping gas and go inside to pay? Does it matter how old they are? The time of the year? How many kids you have? If you can see them from the storefront?

I think most everyone would agree it's never ok to leave your young children in the car when you go grocery shopping - what about the short 2 minute stops (i.e. dropping mail at post office)? I'd guess everyone has left their kids in the car while unloading groceries or loading things in the car.

What is everyone's thoughts on this?

ToledoDeux · October 2011

My thoughts: never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever.

ames71 · October 2011

I'm paranoid, so I never leave him in the car. Even if it's for something like what you mentioned?running in a store because of a forgotten wallet.

I do remember that when my brother and I were kids, my mom would let us stay in the car while she did the grocery shopping. Like for an hour. Ah... the 70s!

blckwhtyllwgirl · October 2011

ames17:
I'm paranoid, so I never leave him in the car. Even if it's for something like what you mentioned?running in a store because of a forgotten wallet.
I do remember that when my brother and I were kids, my mom would let us stay in the car while she did the grocery shopping. Like for an hour. Ah... the 70s!

Lol my parents did this in the 90s - but it was when I was old enough to say I wanted to wait in the car - and I'd just read.

chach916 · October 2011

I don't think its terrible if you run into a store to pick up a wallet, pay for gas if you can see the car and your kids the entire time.

That being said, I would never do it. Did anyone else see that Dr Phil episode where the mom got arrested for leaving her kid when she went inside to pay for gas. I'll pay at the pump or take the extra effort to just go back in with my kids.

CinemaGoddess · October 2011

I've left the girls in the car alone for like, 30 seconds, while I ran back in the house to grab something. DH has left them alone to go pay for gas, but he could see them out the window at the gas station.

wedsept · October 2011

You should never leave a kid in a car alone, even for 1 minute. In the summer months, the cars get too hot and they can die. Someone could kidnap them. You just never know.

There was a news story of someone in my city leaving their DD in the car for a few minutes to pick up prescription glasses at Costco. Someone saw the child, called police, they rescued the child and he got arrested. He is being prosecuted for child endangerment. It is a crime to leave your child alone in the car as it should be.

numeria11 · October 2011

I'm generally in the never ever camp but this last weekend I ran into a situation where I didnt really have a choice but to leave her in the car. I was driving down 4+ hours away to see my family without DH and about an 1hr and 1/2 away from our destination I had to pee so bad I seriously thought I was gonna die. We were driving thru a really rural area and had been stuck behind farm equipment for the last 30 minutes of our drive with no where to stop until we hit one of the small towns.

By the time we got there I could barely walk let alone fight with my sleeping toddler to take her out of the car seat. I locked the doors pulled up in front of the station and ran inside, used the bathroom and was back out in under 2 minutes. Did it worry me yeah little but at the same time I am in a town of maybe a 1000 people so it didnt worry me as much as it would have in Chicago.

cherylnicole · October 2011

CinemaGoddess:

I've left the girls in the car alone for like, 30 seconds, while I ran back in the house to grab something. DH has left them alone to go pay for gas, but he could see them out the window at the gas station.

This pretty much exactly...we do leave the car running though and our automatic lock key ring pops off so if we do have to run back in the house really quick, we leave the car running, pop off the key chain and lock the doors..

DreadLoc · October 2011

I wouldn't do it to pay for gas or grab something I left at a store. Most gas stations or pharmacies around here only have one employee working and there is always a line. I wouldn't risk having to wait behind other people.

But I've done it when I had to return a movie to a redbox or blockbuster express if it's not hot outside. Just lock the doors, run to the machine, and run back to the car. Max: 30 seconds.

AnneMaria522 · October 2011

Only when I get home with groceries and I take them up stairs. As long as the garage door is shut, the car door is open and it isn't too hot. Otherwise he is alone on the second floor while I go into the garage to get the groceries.

I wouldn't feel comfortable leaving him in the car to go into a store even if I could see him.

aluminium · October 2011

wife07mom09:
I only do it if the car and baby are in my full view. i.e., the dry cleaner with glass windows or take out. I never leave her unattended

I've done this once, and I still felt so awkward even though the baby was in the car just 10 steps away from the dry cleaner counter. I do everything I can now to get errands done before or after work while I am alone.

blckwhtyllwgirl · October 2011

chach916:
I don't think its terrible if you run into a store to pick up a wallet, pay for gas if you can see the car and your kids the entire time.

That being said, I would never do it. Did anyone else see that Dr Phil episode where the mom got arrested for leaving her kid when she went inside to pay for gas. I'll pay at the pump or take the extra effort to just go back in with my kids.

That's interesting - I wonder if it's illegal in every state - and if everyone is aware of that. I've seen people do this - particularly now that I'm noticing it since having this discussion earlier this week.

BLUEIEDHIPPY · October 2011

I have left H in the car to run back in the house for bottles/binks that I forgot or to unload groceries if he fell asleep on the way home...I'm always afraid in public that someone would want to steal my old beat up mini van from 1989 child & all....I know I have issues

KoalaBear103 · October 2011

I've left Ryan in the car (not turned on and in the garage) if I've forgotten something in the house, but that's about it.

I'm uber paranoid and would not be able to leave him other wise.

blckwhtyllwgirl · October 2011

It seems like people that have 2+ kids are more likely to have done this than those with just one - which makes sense when you are talking about some of the examples given above (paying for gas, returning movie to redbox, post office, etc).

juliedooley · October 2011

The only 2 times I've done this is when I'm parking the car and have to go get a meter receipt (the Chicago girls know the annoyance that is meter parking here nowadays). Once he was sleeping and once it was raining, and the meter box was within 1-2 carlengths of me so I literally could see him the entire time.

Otherwise I can't imagine any situation where I'd be OK with it--no errand is worth the risk to me where I can't just do it later. It freaks me out that others would leave their children where they can't see them at all, even for a couple minutes. There's just too many "what ifs" for me.

bumpuser260585 · October 2011

blckwhtyllwgirl:

I got into a discussion with another mother this week on when, if ever, it is ok to leave children in the car. I was curious what you all thought. Is there ever a circumstance it's ok to leave them in car? For example, you forgot your wallet on the counter at Walgreens - do you take both kids out of the carseat to run in and grab it - or do you just run in? What about when you are pumping gas and go inside to pay? Does it matter how old they are? The time of the year? How many kids you have? If you can see them from the storefront?

I think most everyone would agree it's never ok to leave your young children in the car when you go grocery shopping - what about the short 2 minute stops (i.e. dropping mail at post office)? I'd guess everyone has left their kids in the car while unloading groceries or loading things in the car.

What is everyone's thoughts on this?

I don't do this. I take DS in first & put him in his crib or somewhere safe, then I go get the groceries. Yesterday I got groceries & put him in his high chair with some toys so I could carry in the groceries.

When DS was about 8 weeks old, I needed to get cash from the ATM. The drive up one was out of order, so the only one available was one you had to get out & walk up to. I didn't even do that. I drove to another ATM. I guess I'm just to paranoid.

I'm not going to say I will never do it, because I guess you never know, but I don't see myself doing it any time soon.

carlab44 · October 2011

MrsLacy:

I wouldn't do it to pay for gas or grab something I left at a store. Most gas stations or pharmacies around here only have one employee working and there is always a line. I wouldn't risk having to wait behind other people.

But I've done it when I had to return a movie to a redbox or blockbuster express if it's not hot outside. Just lock the doors, run to the machine, and run back to the car. Max: 30 seconds.

This is the same with me. If I have to enter a building I won't leave them. But I often return books to the library. I pull over, turn the car off (I would never leave them in the car with it running), lock the doors, and run the 30' to the drop box at the library.

blckwhtyllwgirl · October 2011

The root of this whole topic came out of my mom freaking out on me. I bring both kids to the dog daycare and hotel I own a couple times a week. She asked me how I manage it (how do I bring 2 kids, their toy bag, my bag, their diaper bag, two dogs, etc inside). I told her that I first bring in the dogs, then the baby, then the toddler (bringing bags each time). She was all worried that I was leaving them alone in my truck for a couple minutes while unloading at the business I own (which isn't in a big shopping area - there aren't any other businesses nearby). I thought she was being a bit extreme.

Hence, this being on my mind while talking to other mothers this week and wanting to know everyone's thoughts on this.

Angela814 · October 2011

In the car in my garage or driveway, yes, but I'm in a very safe subdivision in a good neighborhood. I wouldn't do it if I lived say in downtown Milwaukee.

I've left the girls in the car to put books in the library return slot outside. That took all of 30 seconds, if that. I'll also leave them in the car to return a cart to the cart corral, but I always make sure to park as close as possible to one.

I wouldn't leave them to go inside a store for any amount of time.

numeria11 · October 2011

anna karenina:
numeria11:

I'm generally in the never ever camp but this last weekend I ran into a situation where I didnt really have a choice but to leave her in the car. I was driving down 4+ hours away to see my family without DH and about an 1hr and 1/2 away from our destination I had to pee so bad I seriously thought I was gonna die. We were driving thru a really rural area and had been stuck behind farm equipment for the last 30 minutes of our drive with no where to stop until we hit one of the small towns.

By the time we got there I could barely walk let alone fight with my sleeping toddler to take her out of the car seat. I locked the doors pulled up in front of the station and ran inside, used the bathroom and was back out in under 2 minutes. Did it worry me yeah little but at the same time I am in a town of maybe a 1000 people so it didnt worry me as much as it would have in Chicago.

This would scare me even more. A rural area where you don't know the people or the crime rates. Was it at night? I would rather pee next to the door then leave them alone at night.

Actually I do know the crime rate and the area since I spent much of my life in that area. Crime rate, incredibly low. No it was like 1 in the afternoon broad daylight.

wife1014 · October 2011

I did it this morning. I was dropping the dog off at the groomer. It is a private driveway and I pulled right to the door. Opened the door, said "here's Dunes. Call me when he's done".

I also leave them in the garage if they are sleeping and I don't think they'll transfer to the beds or if I have a boatload of stuff to bring in. Of course, the car doors are open, the door leading to the house is open and the garage bays are closed.

I would never do it to go in somewhere. If I can't have my eye on the car at all moments, I don't leave them. No way, no how, not ever.

NiniJ55 · October 2011

If I'm pumping gas and standing right there - I would leave him. If I have to pay inside -- I would take him with me.

Other than pumping and standing right there -- I can not think of one single instance where I would leave him in the car.

ETA: Also - I won't leave him in the car while I unload groceries, either. I take DS out of the seat and put him in his crib if nobody is home while I unload the car.

Wowie+Zowie · October 2011

You're a fvcking idiot if you leave your kid in a car alone.

cherylnicole · October 2011

anna karenina:
blckwhtyllwgirl:

The root of this whole topic came out of my mom freaking out on me. I bring both kids to the dog daycare and hotel I own a couple times a week. She asked me how I manage it (how do I bring 2 kids, their toy bag, my bag, their diaper bag, two dogs, etc inside). I told her that I first bring in the dogs, then the baby, then the toddler (bringing bags each time). She was all worried that I was leaving them alone in my truck for a couple minutes while unloading at the business I own (which isn't in a big shopping area - there aren't any other businesses nearby). I thought she was being a bit extreme.

Hence, this being on my mind while talking to other mothers this week and wanting to know everyone's thoughts on this.

I don't think your mom is being extreme at all. I would take the kids in first and put them in a safe place and then unload everything.

I disagree. I think kids could get into very scary situations when left unattended (especially at a business place type setting) I would probably do the same as OP

lildevil968 · October 2011

I'll do it if I left something in the house, and need to run back inside to get it. I have never and will never do it at a store, gas station, etc.

USMCPurpleHeart · October 2011

Never have never will. Too many risks, VERY dangerous and irresponsible IMO.

NiniJ55 · October 2011

cherylnicole:
anna karenina:
blckwhtyllwgirl:

The root of this whole topic came out of my mom freaking out on me. I bring both kids to the dog daycare and hotel I own a couple times a week. She asked me how I manage it (how do I bring 2 kids, their toy bag, my bag, their diaper bag, two dogs, etc inside). I told her that I first bring in the dogs, then the baby, then the toddler (bringing bags each time). She was all worried that I was leaving them alone in my truck for a couple minutes while unloading at the business I own (which isn't in a big shopping area - there aren't any other businesses nearby). I thought she was being a bit extreme.

Hence, this being on my mind while talking to other mothers this week and wanting to know everyone's thoughts on this.

I don't think your mom is being extreme at all. I would take the kids in first and put them in a safe place and then unload everything.

I disagree. I think kids could get into very scary situations when left unattended (especially at a business place type setting) I would probably do the same as OP

I'm on the fence with this one -- becuase where can they possilby be secure at the business while she is unloading the car? I can see the kids getting into a lot of trouble being left unattended at the business.

BUT Since this is an ongoing thing (every week - twice a week)... I woulld leave a play pen at the business just for this purpose. This way they can actually be secure inside vs. being left in the car. Of course -- that's if it's even possible to do this as an option.

Wowie+Zowie · October 2011

wife07mom09:
I only do it if the car and baby are in my full view. i.e., the dry cleaner with glass windows or take out. I never leave her unattended

You are stupid as hell. Even if the car is in full view, someone CAN and WILL steal your car with your child in it.

NEWSFLASH. Your child is unattended in your car if you are NOT in that car with them.

mexicolombiana · October 2011

juliedooley:
The only 2 times I've done this is when I'm parking the car and have to go get a meter receipt (the Chicago girls know the annoyance that is meter parking here nowadays). Once he was sleeping and once it was raining, and the meter box was within 1-2 carlengths of me so I literally could see him the entire time.
Otherwise I can't imagine any situation where I'd be OK with it--no errand is worth the risk to me where I can't just do it later. It freaks me out that others would leave their children where they can't see them at all, even for a couple minutes. There's just too many "what ifs" for me.

This exactly for me. (yup those stupid parking boxes suck).

Chelle112 · October 2011

The only time I've ever done it is if I've left something in the house and I run inside really quick. Like, 20 seconds, tops.

Other than that, I wouldn't leave him alone. And yes, I've left something inside a store and taken him back in with me to get it.

epopp85 · October 2011

I'll admit, I leave DS in car sometimes while running in and out like you listed for something quick, HOWEVER, I have a keyless entry pad and can leave the car locked and running while I'm inside. I also never leave him for more than 5 minutes. I've sat my stuff down and left before because it was taking longer than that.

eitaknna9 · October 2011

At home, yes, I'll run back in the house when the car is still in the garage with the garage doors closed. Anywhere else, no.

I once witnessed my neighbor across the street leave the car outside, back door wide open, baby in back seat while she ran groceries in the house and left the car unattended for at least two minutes. I was so mad, and could not understand why she could not take the baby in first then come back and get the groceries.

SparkleTart · October 2011

I don't think I would if I was going somewhere I had to run inside. The only time I've done it is when I'm unloading groceries, etc, or running to the Redbox.

BelleIsa · October 2011

ames17:

I'm paranoid, so I never leave him in the car. Even if it's for something like what you mentioned?running in a store because of a forgotten wallet.

I do remember that when my brother and I were kids, my mom would let us stay in the car while she did the grocery shopping. Like for an hour. Ah... the 70s!

Yeah, I remember being left in the car a lot.

And you know, I'm not going to make my teenagers get out of the car when I'm just poping in somewhere...

eitaknna9 · October 2011

epopp85:
I'll admit, I leave DS in car sometimes while running in and out like you listed for something quick, HOWEVER, I have a keyless entry pad and can leave the car locked and running while I'm inside. I also never leave him for more than 5 minutes. I've sat my stuff down and left before because it was taking longer than that.

Um, you do realize that someone can break the window, jump in the car and take off in a matter of seconds, right? And, 5 minutes. Seriously? I am baffled.

Angela814 · October 2011

eitaknna9:

I once witnessed my neighbor across the street leave the car outside, back door wide open, baby in back seat while she ran groceries in the house and left the car unattended for at least two minutes. I was so mad, and could not understand why she could not take the baby in first then come back and get the groceries.

How old was the baby? DD2 is far safer strapped into the carseat while I run groceries inside than she would be in the house while I try to run them in and out. But I guess that all depends on where you live.

Wowie+Zowie · October 2011

eitaknna9:

epopp85:
I'll admit, I leave DS in car sometimes while running in and out like you listed for something quick, HOWEVER, I have a keyless entry pad and can leave the car locked and running while I'm inside. I also never leave him for more than 5 minutes. I've sat my stuff down and left before because it was taking longer than that.

Um, you do realize that someone can break the window, jump in the car and take off in a matter of seconds, right? And, 5 minutes. Seriously? I am baffled.

EUPirate says "to each their own" so it MUST be okay. <eyerolling>

t.bird · October 2011

at home? heck yes. i live in the middle of nowhere.

anywhere else? never.

do i want to sometimes? hell yes. but it's not worth the risk.

mrs.kapow · October 2011

Angela814:
eitaknna9:

I once witnessed my neighbor across the street leave the car outside, back door wide open, baby in back seat while she ran groceries in the house and left the car unattended for at least two minutes. I was so mad, and could not understand why she could not take the baby in first then come back and get the groceries.
How old was the baby? DD2 is far safer strapped into the carseat while I run groceries inside than she would be in the house while I try to run them in and out. But I guess that all depends on where you live.

Ditto. If DD is asleep when we get home, I will take my keys with me (keyless entry so you cannot drive the car w/o keys inside it) and go let the dog out, etc. I don't do this anywhere but my own home, but I do believe she is safer in her carseat than anywhere in the house without my direct supervision.

Want a personalized experience?

Leaving kids in car?

Re: Leaving kids in car?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards