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April 2012 Moms
DD#1 9-4-04 *** DD#2 10-15-07
BFP#3 10-25-10 *EDD 7/1/11 * missed m/c @ 13w3d
BFP#4 7-30-11 *EDD 4/8/12 ~ DD#3 born 4/4/12
If you had a loss...come in
I think there are a few of us on here who have had losses. How are you ladies doing this time around? I am sure you're nervous (as I have read from some) but are you or have you gotten comfortable with this pregnancy yet?
I had my loss at 13w last time so I keep telling myself I will feel better once I get to 14 weeks. I am sure though once I reach that milestone I will still be nervous. I have to admit that I am so happy I have a doppler at home and can now hear the hb every time.
Have you been having more appts. because of your loss(es)?
I hope for everyone this is our take home baby.
DD#1 9-4-04 *** DD#2 10-15-07
BFP#3 10-25-10 *EDD 7/1/11 * missed m/c @ 13w3d
BFP#4 7-30-11 *EDD 4/8/12 ~ DD#3 born 4/4/12
This discussion has been closed.
Re: If you had a loss...come in
I've been nervous since the beginning, as I'm sure we all have been. I had two BO's in a row, so once I passed that hurdle I started being afraid of a mmc. The doppler has helped me a bit, but every couple of days I get nervous again and pull it out to check. Now I'm terrified that they'll find something on my NT. I definitely worried with DS and DD, but I don't think I was so keenly aware of all of the things that could go wrong. I also had age on my side back then.
I had more appts at the beginning, 2 u/s's to date the PG and make sure it was healthy. I decided to take 5 weeks between my last appt and next. It's actually kind of good b/c I get really worked up before appts now.
Also I am just so thankful to be here.
I have had a chemical pregnancy and ectopic pregnancy before, so ruling out those two things with this pregnancy really helped. My OB got me in for two early ultrasounds- one at 5w1d to check that baby was in the right spot, and one at 6w5d to check for a heartbeat. I was really relieved for a bit and then I started to worry about a missed miscarriage. Having the home doppler has helped my anxiety immensely. I love being able to check in on baby and ease my worries. Our NT scan is on Thursday and I am starting to get a bit nervous for that.
It's still so hard to believe this is really happening this time. I am so hopeful for a healthy take home baby but know I won't stop worrying until that happens. DH lost his daughter in the 3rd trimester in a previous relationship so he is also full of worry.
Lots of love and luck to everyone in this post!
I had one loss back in 2003 at 12 weeks. I have had one successful pregnancy since, with my son I worried the whole entire time, I told myself that after 12 weeks I wouldn't be as worried, but I was. This time I am not nearly as worried as I was with my son, I am not sure why but it is MUCH better.
::HUG:: It is so hard... I am sorry for your loss and I am sending you tons of sticky dust!
DD1 9.24.06
DS 7.1.08
twins due 9.7.11 lost twin A at
DD2 4.7.12
I had a missed m/c in May 2010. It was really rough, even worse because even though I wasn't very far along, I felt so guilty that I missed it. I ended up in the hospital with contractions, otherwise I thought it was a period.
DS was only 8 months old at the time. My pregnancy with him had been great- but this time, I definitely am a nervous wreck. I'm so scared of something going wrong and definitely will be happy when I get to 13 weeks! Next appt is Oct 11th to try to hear the heartbeat, and that will probably help a lot too.
We lost Cailin at 28 wks 3 days to a cord accident. I won't be satisfied and not a nervous wreck until this baby is safe in my arms post-delivery. It was an absolutely devastating loss that there are no words for. I knew women who had been forced to deliver after such diagnoses and I thought of how inhumane it was until I went through it myself. It was extremely cathartic after getting over the initial shock, and am so thankful for the chance to hold her and kiss her little head and tell her about my hopes and dreams for her and all of those people that were waiting on her when she got there....it was one of the most precious and awe-inspiring moments of my life to share that time with her and, it's ok because I will see her again in the blink of an eye.
A few weeks ago, right after finding out I was pregnant, I was diagnosed with a blighted ovum and again mourned the loss of a child and my fertility because I had requested a hysterectomy....well, thank goodness my OB sent me for a confirmation Level 2 U/S because there our baby was! I just can't stop worrying that lightening will strike again. My mom, who had a late loss before my oldest sister, said...."Don't be afraid to love this baby" and that's what I repeat in my head when the clouds roll in.
Ladies...Don't Be Afraid to Love THIS Baby!
#1-BFP 08-22-09 ~ M/C 08-31-09 at 5 weeks 6 days
#2-BFP 08-6-11 ~ Due 04/18 ~ born via c-section April 22, 2012
My Blog
Dragonflybelle - what great advice from your mom!
Like some of you ladies, I've been hesitant to tell anyone but DH and we just really want to make it through the first tri - which will be farther than we've made it before. At that point, I'm not sure I'll be comfortable, but at least I'll have the comfort in knowing my body knows what it is doing. Seeing the baby again actually looking like a baby in the next u/s will probably make it real for me and allow me to breathe a little easier. All I've seen in the past are gummy bear babys and little specs, so I've somewhat detached myself from the process of becoming a "mommy".
I do wish my OB had told me earlier on that the percentage of early m/c was as high as it is. Once I've told people I've had a m/c - I was shocked at how many of my friends, etc had gone through the same thing at least once. It's like a private little club, you don't know until you're already in it =(.
Wow, there really are a bunch of us here. It sucks that we have this in common but it is also nice to reach out to each other when we have our fears. My "home" board is the PgAL board ( and I recognize/know a few of you from there) and TTCAL have been my saving grace.
I also had two healthy pregnancies before and I wouldn't say I was naive or clueless it would/could happen to me (I worried with every pregnancy) but I didn't think after seeing the baby on the u/s at 9 weeks it would die just 2 weeks later. But Dragonfly you have made a great point...not to be afraid to love this baby and I was in the beginning afraid. Each passing week or even day I love this baby even more than I did the day before.
Maybe we can do a weekly check-in to see how we all are doing emotionally and mentally?!?!?!? I don't mind doing them either.
DD#1 9-4-04 *** DD#2 10-15-07
BFP#3 10-25-10 *EDD 7/1/11 * missed m/c @ 13w3d
BFP#4 7-30-11 *EDD 4/8/12 ~ DD#3 born 4/4/12
I m/c my first pregnancy at 4w4d. I'm still not entirely comfortable with this one, despite being over 10 weeks now. I don't think I'll be fully comfortable until LO is in my arms.
I've been having regular appointments so far. I'm trying not to freak out over every little thing but it's a mental challenge every day. It's gotten to the point I had to lay off Google because I was becoming obsessed with it. I just keep reminding myself, 'Today I'm pregnant, and I love my baby.'
DD #1 passed away in January 2011 at 14 days old due to congenital heart disease
DD#2 lost in January 2012 at 23 weeks due to anhydramnios caused by a placental abruption
BFP#1 05/19/10 M/C 6/4/10 d/x threatened m/c 6/6/10 m/c confirmed
BFP#2 10/26/10 M/C 11/01/10
BFP#3 11/28/10 C/P 11/29/10
BFP#4 02/23/11 M/C 3/1/11
BFP#5 08/13/11 EDD 04/27/12 Beta @11DPO 8.79 Beta @13DPO 36 Beta @17DPO 179 Beta @20DPO 679!! 6w3d hb 116 bpm! 8w3d hb 164 bpm! 10w4d hb 177-187 NT scan 12w2d hb 173-everything looks great! 14w4d-everything still looks great! A/S scheduled for 12/12!
Our rainbow baby is here!! Emmalynn Anne born 4/27/12 via unplanned c-section
BFP#6 Surprise! Here comes baby #2! Harper Elizabeth born 12/17/13 via c-section
I had a missed m/c in February--today would have been my EDD. I went in for the first u/s and the tech told me that the baby was measuring small (by two weeks) and that the hb was low (82) and that she wouldn't go posting on FB. (nice, right). The next week I went in, and the baby had stopped growing probably the day after the first u/s. I had a d&c the next day.
I fluctuate between worry and joy. Some days, I know my baby's fine and I'll be happily pregnant for the next 29 weeks or so. Other days, I think that maybe I've had another missed m/c and I can't wait the next two weeks until my NT scan.
About two weeks ago, I went in for my first OB appointment. I called ahead to make sure we'd hear the hb and when I got there, my doctor said she wouldn't be able to hear it because I was only 9w2d, which made me cry. She tried with the Doppler and knew that I'd be a wreck if I walked out and didn't hear the hb so they gave me an u/s. The tech was awesome--baby was measuring right on track and had a nice, high hb of 175. I know that today I am pregnant and I love my baby, but it's hard. I have a friend coming over today and I want to tell her, but I'm so worried that something will happen and I'll have to untell her. Just two more weeks until the NT scan, and then we'll go public. And I can't wait.
mm 2/17/11 * dd born 4/20/12 * bo 1/3/14 * edd 1/21/ 1/15
I had a late loss at 22 weeks. We went in for an ultrasound, and there was no heartbeat. 4 days earlier, my doc had heard the heartbeat on the dopplar. It was devestating for my husband and I. This was our first child, and we were both very naive about the fact that something could go wrong. I knew in the 1st tri, that there was a chance of miscarriage, but it wasnt really something I worried about. I had to actually deliver Austin, and we got to see him and hold him...take pictures with him, and the rest of my family got to meet him as well. I was so happy to be able to hold him, and have some precious memories with him. We had so many hopes and dreams for him. After coming home with no baby, I broke down. All I wanted was my baby.
4 months to the day that I delievered (which was also Austin's EDD), we found out that we were pregnant. It really helped me on that day. A week after we lost Austin, my husband and I were talking and he said 'Austin will help bless us with another baby, I just know it' I wasn't nearly as positive, but after finding out on his due date about the new baby, we both feel strongly that he's our little angel watching above us.
This pregnancy has been difficult. I check for blood every time I wipe, even though I'm not really as concerned about a mc since I haven't had one of those. I fear and both love every doctor appointment because I'm so scared that something will be wrong, but happy when I hear that everything is ok. My ob has been absolutly great. He tried to hear on the dopplar last appt, and when he couldn't find it, we immediatly went for an u/s. He told me that his goal for that appointment was to make me assured that my baby was okay. I'm also seeing a high risk doctor, and we're being watched very closely. I still fear every day that something is going to happen. The day of an ultrasound, I will feel secure that baby is okay, but the next day, my fear comes back.
I pray everyday, and love my baby every day, but I can only take it a day at a time. I can't look forward to the milestones such as the a/s, v-day, holding the baby in my arms......I can only do 1 day at a time. My husband says I'm too negative, but it's the only way I can deal.
Sorry that turned out really long. Kudos if you read all that. It is reassuring to me to know that there are others out there that have suffered a loss too. I just feel like I can relate better to you guys. I'm jaded, and know that all pregancies don't always end well. Wishing us all healthy take home babies.....
I went to the dr in May knowing I had a progesterone issue, thanks to charting, and was shocked to be told I was pregnant. I had just had what I thought was a period, but had started spotting a few days later. About a week later, when I was on vacation, I started passing tissue and was diagnosed w/BO at 5wk3days.
I heard the hb at my first appt, but was measuring 1 or 2 days off. I have my next appt Wed. and am terrified because I'm not sure if it's really the baby I am hearing on the doppler. I think if I can get past my 14wk appt I will feel much more comfortable.
I've had 4 losses all around 5 weeks. So I have gotten a lot farther this time (or it feels like a lot to me). I'm still nervous, but it's getting better. I worry more about is the baby healthy and labor now.
I see my Dr every 2 weeks right now instead of every 4 which is his standard. I feel like it's going to be ok this time. My progesterone was low and if that winds up being my only problem, then I am over that hump. I can quit using my medicine now and baby should make it's own now. I know that's not to say anything else may not happen, but it makes me feel better to be at this point.
I hope all the ladies who have had losses or not, continue to have healthy pregnancies and healthy babies!
I had a missed miscarriage around this same time last year. Then it took close to a year to get pregnant again. I go to the doctor on Wednesday and I'm a little terrified. I just hope and pray that the baby is healthy and has a heartbeat and is measuring where it should be.
It is very difficult being pregnant after a loss. I have not had any extra appointments, however they would be nice. I think about all of you ladies all the time, I hope and pray everything works out for each of us.
I also loved the advice above about it being ok to love this baby. I guess I have been too scared to do so. I haven't been able to buy anything baby related yet. Hopefully after Wedneday I will be able to.
Thanks for starting this and I think a check-in would be great.
I was kind of a basket-case the first few weeks of this pregnancy but have been doing better, until a couple days before each appointment and then I get pretty nervous. Having good ultrasounds at 6 and 8 weeks was wonderful, but now I'm super nervous for my appointment on Wednesday. I tell myself I will relax after the NT scan so hopefully that is the case!
I had a loss between weeks 17-19 last year. We found out at our anatomy scan. Went in thinking we were going to find out boy or girl and left devastated with a major loss. Due to his size I had to go throught the delivery process. I have always had c-sections so it was very emotional to go through a vaginal birth this way. I did get to hold him, get pictures and footprints/handprints.
Our little boy Quinn was delivered on Nov 24th, right before Thanksgiving last year. The one year anniversary lands on Thanksgiving this year so it will be bitter sweet. Sad for the loss of Quinn and hopeful for the new little one on the way.
My due date this time is only one week off from my due date last year. It has been hard to not compare everything. We didn't get any answers for what happened last time so it almost makes it harder to relax this time. I go into every ultrasound terrified.
Hugs to you today.
Best wishes that everything continues well with this pregnancy, and beyond!
I agree that a weekly check-in would be great. I'm happy to do it, unless the OP would like to?
We never got any answers either, and found out during our a/s as well. Our ultrasound tech was being real quiet and not saying anything, a nd then she went to get the doctor. I knew it was bad then, but still refused to believe he wasn't alive. I already told hubby I'm going to be freaking out during this a/s. I'm going to be totally upfront with her, and tell her I need to see it, and she needs to talk to me the whole time ...even if it's bad news. I delievered Austin on 4/4/11, and our due date this time is 4/15/11. It's going to be a bittersweet month.
My anxiety about this pregnancy seems to come and go. I was incredibly pessimistic the first few weeks until I passed my loss milestone, but I still get very worried before each appointment. I think this is just normal after your innocence and naivety about pregnancy is stripped away.
I don't think I've had more appointments, but maybe the first one was earlier than usual? My OB's office has been extremely understanding about my worries and fears with this pregnancy.
The PgAL board has been my "safe" place this time around. Being about to share my fears with other women who have gone through similar situations has truly helped.
DD#1 9-4-04 *** DD#2 10-15-07
BFP#3 10-25-10 *EDD 7/1/11 * missed m/c @ 13w3d
BFP#4 7-30-11 *EDD 4/8/12 ~ DD#3 born 4/4/12
DD#1 9-4-04 *** DD#2 10-15-07
BFP#3 10-25-10 *EDD 7/1/11 * missed m/c @ 13w3d
BFP#4 7-30-11 *EDD 4/8/12 ~ DD#3 born 4/4/12