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Tips for controlling anger?
Does anyone have any tips for controlling your anger when dealing with ex? I thought my hatred and anger would get better over time, but I think I hate him more and more each day. I want to find a way to just put him in a little corner and not let him and his stupidity consume me. I know he does things just to irk me. Please help!
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Re: Tips for controlling anger?
Just keep telling yourself: those that anger us, control us.
It is a process and it doesn't happen overnight. I went through a stage where I was very angry at him. I didn't let this show in front of DS, but it still got to me. I don't think about it anymore because I simply no longer care. you will get there too.
I'm going through a similar situation where I seriously hate the guy. You try and be friendly/cordial with them for the baby's sake and to make life easier for everyone, then you get slapped in the face for it.
I'm due any day now and my ex told me last week (our 2nd conversation since I left him 5 months ago) that he would call me over the weekend to let me know if he would be there for the delivery. After 5 days of absolutely nothing from him, I blocked his email and changed my phone number. I also live in a different state, which does make things much easier. Going forward, I'll take the advice other members post and treat all dealings with him like business and have nothing to do with him outside of that. It's sad that his daughter won't have a relationship with him, but then again, it's probably for the best since he's 30 years old and acts like he's 15. I don't want him playing these same kind of games with her. That will make me seriously angry.
Talking to a therapist helps, depending on your therapist. I started seeing one a few months ago and she's not a good fit for me so I need to find someone else. However, unloading everything onto a non-biased person has been a big relief. I hope that one day I'll wake up and my first thought not be about what an absolute dead beat my ex is and how much I wish him the worst in life.
Well ex disappeared for a while and life was great without him, so I guess even though DD is 10 months it's still pretty new since he's only been back and bugging the crap out of me for a couple of months. I went to a counselor while I was pregnant and afterwards and then stopped shortly after he disappeared. I suppose it wouldn't hurt to talk to her again. And making time for exercise is a great suggestion! I used to work out all the time before having DD, and I need to make that a priority again.
Thanks ladies!