Sleep training (Ferber?) a toddler?

Re: Sleep training (Ferber?) a toddler?

• DCtoLowcountry

  August 2011

  Yes, sleep training a toddler can be done. I've used Ferber/CIO method and also a lamp on a light timer. We started using the light timer right around DS's first birthday, so it might be a good time to give it a try. The method is cribbed from maybeachbride - hi if you're reading this!

   We have a lamp in his room and a timer we got at Home Depot for $15. The lamp goes off a few minutes before bedtime. We make a big deal out of the fact that the light is off and now it's time for sleep. With middle of the night wakeups, you use Ferber and reinforce that the light (which he should be able to see from his crib) is off so it's time for sleep. The "light off" time should be 11 hours for a one-year-old. Then, in the morning when it turns on, you reinforce that now it's morning and time to play! Like Ferber for us, it took 5-7 days of reinforcing before it clicked. And my DS has never had a lovey either. And I'm guessing some of this is because you're weaning and not nursing at night either?

  Like any sleep training, the key is consistency. If M knows that you'll eventually break down and he gets to sleep in your bed, then he will fight until he achieves that outcome. I'm not knocking co-sleeping if you want to - but if you don't want him in your bed, sleep training is an option.

  

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• Sofka

  August 2011

  we had to re-try Ferber at 13mo and it worked, it's so hard when they are older but you have to stick to your guns and not give up. Give it a week

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• Hey Jellisy

  August 2011

  We moved when DD was 9 months and she was terrified of her new room - since we were silly, we let her sleep with us.  After a month or 3, we decided it was time for her to move back to her room and oh was the sleep training so much more painful as a toddler.  She could stand.  She could ask for us by name.  We would find her asleep standing in the corner of her crib.  It took a good week to get her bck in her room, but once we did, it was AOK.   
  

  From December 29, 2011

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• tomandcourt

  August 2011

  We did it when J was 16 months. We hadn't done any sleep training to that point, and he was a great sleeper (usually 11-12 hours straight at night with no issues falling asleep on his own) EXCEPT he was still waking up around 4am to eat.

  Since I had stopped nursing, we decided that needed to end, so we tried Ferbering. It blew. He was so mad that we were going in and not feeding him that he got even more upset. The first night he cried for at least 45 minutes straight.

  After that, we decided to go cold turkey and not go in at all. He didn't cry nearly as long the next night, less the night after that, and since then - no crying. 

  He does have a lovey, though - a Taggie blanket. He uses a paci, too, but only for sleeping. Have you tried that or something similar? They help him a lot when he wakes up disoriented.
  

  
  

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• WinesNot Whines

  August 2011

  I've thought about a paci. He uses one for naps, and sometimes we also give it to him at night if he wakes up and has trouble going back to sleep. We've never given it to him to fall asleep at night the first time though. It might help, but I'm already worried about how I'm going to get him to give up the paci down the line, so I don't know if I should start encouraging him to use it more than he already does. But I guess I could try it for a few nights. If it doesn't work, then I can get rid of it again.

  

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• kafunder member

  August 2011

  At this age, I'd probably do straight up extinction/CIO rather than Ferber, but of course, you know your LO best. DD has started having trouble going down for the night and for naps, and if I go in to comfort her, it just makes it ten times worse. Just a few minutes ago, I let her cry for 5 minutes, and finally she just laid down and went to sleep. Last night, I went into her room after 5 minutes b/c I thought she dropped her paci, and you would have thought the world was ending when I walked out. It just set her off and she fussed for 35 minutes. Not going in is better for her.

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• Sofka

  August 2011

  WinesNot Whines:

  I've thought about a paci. He uses one for naps, and sometimes we also give it to him at night if he wakes up and has trouble going back to sleep. We've never given it to him to fall asleep at night the first time though. It might help, but I'm already worried about how I'm going to get him to give up the paci down the line, so I don't know if I should start encouraging him to use it more than he already does. But I guess I could try it for a few nights. If it doesn't work, then I can get rid of it again.

  if he doesn't take it at night, I wouldn't encourage it. Dr. Ferber is a big opponent of any sleep crutches and a pacifier is one of them. Why give him something you'll just have to take away soon anyway?

  as a disclaimer, I am not a big fan of pacifiers and believe they are especially harmful if babies have teeth. I was very lucky in that both my kids gave theirs up by themselves very early, 4mo for DD and 6mo for DS. So I do have a bias against them (my own issue, I know!)

   

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• WinesNot Whines

  August 2011

  No, I'm not a huge fan of pacis either. He used to STTN without one, so I know he's capable of doing it.
  
  

  

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