I normally hang out on the multiples board, but I'm hoping someone here has a suggestion. DS1 will be 4 in mid-September. He's still not fully PT'd. He consistently pees in the potty, but 95% of the time when he poops he goes a tiny bit in his underwear and then goes more in the potty. I've asked his pedi for suggestions, our EI therapist (the twins are in EI for speech), his preschool teachers. I tell his everyday that he needs to tell me before he goes so we can go to the potty. We offer rewards and consequences (if he put all of his poop in the potty then he gets a "fun size" Kit Kat, and he gets to fall asleep in our room. He knows that he can't go to school next year if he doesn't get this figured out, but nothing changes. I can ask him 100x/day if he needs to go potty and he always says no. Does anyone have any suggestions? He knows that's where it's supposed to go, but he ALWAYS starts going in his underwear first. I know he can do it because he did really well for about 2 weeks, but then reverted back to the same issue.
Re: Hi from multiples - PTing issue
I had an issue with my one twin doing this. Half the time she would poop on the potty and half the time she would poop her pants. I tried every reward I could think of and it didn't work. She knew what she was doing was wrong but didn't seem to care. See she is the kind of kid that will only put in the least amount of effort possible to get what she wants. So if she goes half the time on the potty she gets a reward those days and that is good enough for her.
So bascially I had to give her a consequence for not pooping on the potty 100% of the time. I told her if she pooped in her panties than she could not get in the pool the next day to swim. We have an inground pool and she looooves to swim. The first time it happened, I had to make her stay inside and she watched from the window while I got in the pool with her twin. She just cried and cried, but she never pooped in her panties again. And every time she pooped on the potty from that day on she would say, I get to go in the pool Mommy.
Is there something he really likes to do that you do as a family and you can tell him if he poops his pants he will have to stay home and your DH or you can take the twins and go do this activity without him? Sometimes this is more of a motivator for kids than an actual reward. I don't see it as a punishment but as a consequence. You don't follow the rules you don't get to do your favorite activity, but also that is not going to stop the rest of the family from doing this fun activity.
Getting our little girl to poop on the potty was such a battle. We tried everything - treats, sticker charts, bribery, time outs, punishment, reading her a special book every time she was on the potty so she wouldn't get up until she went, anything that we could think of. Nothing worked.
As stupid as it sounds, the thing that finally clicked the light bulb for her was Elmo's potty time. She's not even a huge Elmo or Sesame Street fan. For some reason, watching that DVD only once or twice finally put it in a way that she could understand. We bought that DVD 3 months ago. She has only had 3 accidents since then. Best 10 bucks I ever spent.
If nothing else, I read a story online of people actually cutting holes in the bottom of diapers so kids could sit on the potty while wearing them and still go until they got the hang of it, and then slowly transitioning out of the diaper to just bare butt on toilet. Good luck to you.