Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: To circ or not to circ
I am thinking a lot of little clinics will pop up just on the other side of the state line.
How would they enforce that? 1 year in prison for the parents? If they did put them in jail the tax burden, including loss of income (and therefore loss of taxes), paying for the jail time and putting some of those kids in foster care, would be outrageous and California is nearly broke. I guess if they only enforced the fine, you could just consider it part of the "fee" of getting the procedure and California would make a bundle.
We had our sons circumcised in the hospital when they were born. DH was present at both procedures. This is the one decision that I definitely deferred to my then-husband on, him owning the same equipment and all. He was circumcised and would prefer that over not being circumcised to the point that he would have had it done surgically as an adult, but was so glad he didn't have to go through that.
We circumcised. I never had a doubt about it. DF also had no problem with it. I knew a few people who didn't circumcised their sons and they had to have it done when they were older and I knew I could never put my DS through that. These days I think it's just a matter of the opinion of the parents.
ETA: sorry just read the article and I think it's ridiculous they are making this decision for the parents. I would think it would be better to get it done as a baby because #1-they don't remember it & #2-there is less to have to take off (sorry)
We did not circ our son. Why? In my country they don't do it. My DH is from here (USA) and he is circumcised, so I told him that I will let him decide. He did some research... and decided that the pros are not that convincing.
The pediatric that we are seeing also doesn't think that it is necessary.
I am Jewish, so I did. The bill SICKENS me. Cannot even form the words to express how much I feel that this proposed law seems anti-Semitic. Jail time? For following your religious beliefs that are NOT harmful. There have been several posts on the Bump re: this and how people (not saying you, MyPunkinPie) feel it's mutilation and torture. When I believe it's part of what connects a Jewish male to G-d. But these people forget about CHOICE.
IMO, being Pro-Choice also equals being against this bill.
Bronx Zoo: Summer 2013
To read my blog, click on the giraffe pic below!
DD -- 5YO
DS -- 3YO
I agree with you on this aspect also Robyn. I can't imagine it will pass, but if it did, I think the Supreme Court would reverse it. Not on the same level of offensiveness, IMO, but after this, maybe they propose a bill that makes it illegal to pierce little girls ears until a certain age. Not something we did, but there is a strong cultural connection for some people and others just prefer it.
I can't believe this even made it to the ballot.
This hasn?t come up for us yet, but I?m also in the ?I?ll defer to MH on this decision? camp. MH & I did talk about it before we found out we were having a girl. It was agreed that if we were having a boy, he would be circumcised just like MH.
I remember when my paternal grandfather was 65, circumcision became medically necessary for him. Not that I needed to know that.
We will be circumcising our son due in December. I know that my husband feels very strongly about it due to the face he was uncircumcised until age 24 when it became necessary. I don't think he would wish his adult circumcision on anyone.
We circumcised and for us, it wasn't even a conversation. Though I have heard that more people are opting to not circumcise, in my informal poll of my friends, all of them who have sons had it done. Honestly, I couldn't care less what other people do regarding circumcision. Everyone does what they think is best for their baby.
I think the bill is ridiculous and I would be very surprised if it actually passed.
We didn't because DH is European. No one outside of the US does it unless it's for religious reasons! The whole, "I know people who had to do it later," "I don't want my kid to look like a sharpei," "it's gross not to" line of thinking really annoys me.
Nobody else freakin' does this! American men are the exception, not the rule to knee-jerk circ'ing!
All that aid, making it illegal is incredibly stupid.
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We didn't. And we made the decision mostly since in this day and age, it's not all that medically necessary anymore. (Exceptions, of course) Our pedi says it's about 50/50 lately.
Hubby is, and I put it to him to decide, for the most part. If it was up to me, I probably would have done it. But his feeling was that This is how God made us... who are we to alter the original designwork.
Wow.. my inlaws live in LA and I hadn't heard about this bill.. I can't imagine with the Jewish population of LA that this will pass in Santa Monica..??? My hubby is Jewish, but even if he weren't Jewish, I would circumcise my son. I want him to look like his Daddy.. and feel comfortable with his body. Interesting b/c I think that most people I know in NY area who aren't Jewish would also just do it b/c it has traditionally been done around here. I have 5 nephews (who are Catholic).. and they all had it done.
I have to say.. I have some more progressive friends who didn't circ their son (who is same age as
.. and he's had a few infections on the foreskin of his little penis. I also taught K in LA almost a decade ago and had a 5 year old student get it done over one of the vacations and it took a few weeks to heal and was quite painful for him. His parents regretted not doing it when he was a baby, but he wanted it done at 5, so they did it.
We did not. We have no religious reason to, my hubby is circumcised, and we are American...our decision was more medical we felt that if there was no medical reason we would not. Ironically my older son almost needed one because of urinary problems, but they allowed us to wait a month and the issue corrected itself.
That said, I am a little disturbed that the Bill seems to think that parents cannot make informed decisions on their own.
Same story here DH is European and I also did research on it. We did not circ.
In our house and family it wasn't even a discussion, DS got the circ. It may be an American 'thing' but its the norm for all the males in my family and MH.
What I would have never guessed was that there would be a problem. The doctor did not remove enough skin, it is basically closing up and will need to be revised at 6 mo. It breaks my heart that LO will need to have the revision, but we feel that strongly that he is circ'd. And if 6 mo is the earlies it can be done, then that is when he will have it. Definitely don't want to wait until later.
Rowen Alexander born 10 weeks early 1/28/07
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According to DH, it comes up during things like toilet training and swim lessons. Only for a few years, but years where it really matters.
We circ'd because DH is the primary caregiver and he was worried that he wouldn't be able to keep everything properly cleaned otherwise. I had no strong opinion either way.